G.L. asks from San Marcos, CA on December 17, 2008
18 Month Baby Has Stopped Sleeping Through the Night!
My baby daughter was the kind you could just put down in bed with a bottle, turn on the mobile and leave the room and she'd go to sleep on her own no problem. Lately for the past couple of weeks, she hasn't been napping well (waking up crying midway through) and at night she goes to sleep at 8 pm, wakes up at 1 am crying for milk and then again at 5:30 am. At 5:30 I have to hold her until she falls asleep or she doesn't stop crying and then regular wake-up time is 6:30 or 7:00. My husband and I have tried to give her water instead of milk at 1 am and let her cry it out but it doesn't work. Any ideas how I can get her to sleep through the night again? We are both so tired...
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So What Happened?™
Hi Ladies,
Happy Holidays and thanks for all the responses. Yes, after checking her mouth, she is getting her top molars in and the bottom gums are swollen so they're coming in next! I do still get up to soothe her when she wakes in the middle of the night - my heart couldn't take the "crying out theory" but like you all said, she's going through another growth phase and so things will still be a roller coaster ride for a while. It just gets hard when you haven't had uninterrupted sleep in 19 months! Thank you all again and I hope you all had a lovely and safe holiday. Regards, G.
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A.H. answers from Los Angeles on December 18, 2008
I feel for you! I am in the same boat. I dont know what to do either, sorry, but I want you to know that you're not alone. I have tried to let her cry it out and she will stay up screaming forever. She will make herself throw up, so I cant do that anymore. I hear that eventually it ends...
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J.S. answers from Los Angeles on December 17, 2008
Check to see if she is getting her molars in. Teething tablets are great and offer cool teethers. Perhaps some tylenol to ease the pain.
She is also of the age for night terrors which is an unfotunate stage you just have to work through over time. All you offer is comfort.
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B.B. answers from San Diego on December 18, 2008
I just went through this with my DD. Ends up she had a double ear infection and was getting in her molars. A trip to your doctor wouldn't hurt.
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S.H. answers from Honolulu on December 17, 2008
Tis' the changes of a child. She is probably going through developmental changes or about to hit new milestones. This is what typically happens. It's normal. It's a phase. One phase of many. At 2 years old it happens again.
Sleep is not static in a child. But you are lucky your little one has been a good sleeper.
Just keep consistent in your nap/bedtime routines and times. This is important. It will pass.
When they go through these changes, it's not easy for them either. So, just be patient.
She could also be going through teething, or "night terrors" (look it up online) and these are normal too. It's developmental.
She could also be hungry, as she is growing.
Or, she may be getting sick or not feeling well... this is also how they behave when they don't feel well.
Or, it could be "separation anxiety", and yes, it's normal at this age, and even when they are in their crib and "supposed" to be sleeping... their "emotions" are ALSO developing... and this is a new thing for them.
It is many things at the same time, that a baby or child has to adjust too. They are changing so fast each month.
The Toddler years from about 2 years old will bring another set of sleep issues... for the Parent. So head's up. EACH age has different manifestations of sleep changes and emotions. Such is the life for a child, and then the Parent.
A great book series is "Your 1 year old" or "Your 2 year old." You can find it on www.amazon.com It has a book for each age of a child. Its a fast easy read and explains each age and what they go through. It's great to understand them, from a child's perspective.
All the best, I know it's tiring.. but they grow up so fast. Lack of sleep for parents is the thing we can't always avoid. One day you will miss it. :)
take care,
Susan
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D.M. answers from Los Angeles on December 18, 2008
Alright, please don't just let her cry...if this is consistent, and she is really crying then she needs something. I read a couple of the other posts, and it got me really worked up. While that may work well for others, I don't feel that letting a child cry or getting mad at them for crying is the solution. If she is continuing to cry then something is wrong, she's not testing you or trying to pull the wool over your eyes...she's still a baby. What are we here for as Mommies, if not to nuture and care for our kids when something is wrong?
This phase is typical and even as a co-sleeper my son and I experienced wakings like this, and it was a tough time. Your little girl is trying to tell you something, and needing you to hold her is one of those things. There were nights I had to rock my son back to sleep at this age/stage, and hold him until he was sound asleep and put him back in bed.
Making sure your child needs' are met is not a 'bad habit' or them taking advantage of you.
At this age, my son started getting his 'Two Year Molars', and nights were rough for a couple of weeks. I was frazzled and exhausted, but such is the life of a Mommy. I began with teething tablets, drops and gels...eventually gave in and gave him Motrin for the pain. It's better than tylenol because it last about six hours between doses and not four.
If she is waking up and crying for Milk, she may be hungry (as Susan mentioned). During this time my son went through a growth spurt as well, and needed more nourishment. So, we started a bedtime snack (crackers, gold fish or yogurt) and cup of milk before teeth cleaning, and at this age/stage this helped considerably with taming the nightwakings.
There are so many things constantly happening in our toddlers lives, they grow EVERYDAY and learn NEW things. I don't mean to be harsh, but at this stage it is important that your child know she can count on you for whatever she needs and the other posts got under my skin. I think you're doing a great job and following your Mommy instincts.
Good Luck.
D..
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K.S. answers from Los Angeles on December 24, 2008
Hi G., my name is K. Smith and I am a Sleep Consultant and Parenting Coach. It sounds to me like she is chronically over tired. If she doesn't nap well during the day then she will defintely have more night wakings. When you go to sleep exhausted you do not have restful sleep. It is very important at her age that she be taking good naps. At her age she can either be taking two naps or one in the middle of the day. Be sure that she is not getting over-tired before nap time. Bedtime should be much earlier, especially considering she is so over tired already. By 6:30 or 7:00 at the latest. Don't worry about her waking up earlier because you are putting her to bed earlier, this is simply not true. The more you sleep, the better you sleep. Lastly, going to bed with a bottle of milk is not considered self-soothing. Not only is it a bad habit but it is very damaging to her teeth. She needs to learn how to put herself to sleep without the use of any sleep aids, except for a Lovey(blanket, stuffed toy etc...). There is more to sleep training then just letting her cry it out without any sort of plan as to what to do next. If you feel you need help I can create a customized sleep plan for you and help you implement it. Please visit my website for more info about me and my services. www.theindependentchild.com
Best wishes,
K.
A.K. answers from Los Angeles on December 23, 2008
WELL SAID Deanna Leigh M!!!! I completely agree with you. I too completely believe in tending to your baby's needs. ALWAYS. Getting upset at your crying baby is so not the solution and neither is crying it out. That's so sad, frankly.
G. - Your baby definitely does needs something from you. And it could be something as simple as a little extra loving and soothing from mommy or daddy. These phases never last that long and always end. If you don't want to offer milk when she wakes than that is totally fine - you don't have to. But please do not just ignore her. Maybe try bringing her to bed with you? If my 21 month old wakes up crying we will just bring her to bed with us and she sleeps right next to us. It is so lovely to wake up to her beautiful face. And the next night she goes to bed without a problem in her own room and sleeps all the way thru the night. I believe it's because we constantly soothe her and tend to her needs that she is such a stable and secure little girl and sleeps so well on her own. If/when she has a rough phase at night she knows we will be there for her so it never lasts long.
I wish you the best of luck!!!
A.H. answers from Los Angeles on December 18, 2008
I feel for you! I am in the same boat. I dont know what to do either, sorry, but I want you to know that you're not alone. I have tried to let her cry it out and she will stay up screaming forever. She will make herself throw up, so I cant do that anymore. I hear that eventually it ends...
A.O. answers from Las Vegas on December 18, 2008
Have you checked for new teeth coming in? This is a common age to be teething some of the back teeth. I know my toddler sleeps restlessly and is more moody when he is getting his teeth. Hope maybe this will help!
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