26 answers

11 Month Old Won't Sleep

My daughter is 11 months old and is not sleeping well at all. Most nights she wakes up every hour or hour and a 1/2. I live in an apartment and this limits me to the amount of time that I can let her cry. When I do let her cry, she screams at the top of her lungs. When I go in her room I usually just lay her back down(she is usually standing in her crib) and try to run her tummy or back. Most of the time this does not work-she just keeps on screaming. The only thing that will definitely get her to calm down is a bottle. I am pretty sure she is using the sucking as a way to get to sleep. She has never taken a pacifier and still refuses to do so. She has been getting a tooth here and there so I have tried Tylenol, Motrin, teething tablets and baby oragel. None of those measures has made a difference. I am at my wits end here, I have Lupus and can't keep up this pace as I will get sick due to never sleeping. I am not sure what to do with her but I know that this cycle needs to be broken. Help!!

What can I do next?

Featured Answers

It may not be just the sucking that is helping. Maybe she is really hungry. Try putting cereal in her bottle at night to thicken it and fill her for longer. Also, if you have not tried the Soothie pacifiers (available at walmart or target), try them! They are shaped more like a bottle nipple and they are the only ones both of my kids would use. Good Luck!

1 mom found this helpful

Have you tried giving her a bottle with just water in it at night when she wakes up. My son just started sleeping through the night and he is 14months. and I tried everything the books say... it may just take time. Now I am back to an infant!

I know what all the experts say but it didn't work for me. Both of my kids usually started out in my bed (alone or I laid down with them for a short time) and then I moved them to their own beds when I went to bed. My oldest is 17 and has absolutely no issues with sleeping-decided on his own that it was time for him to start his night in his own bed when he was around 8. My 6 year old daughter still falls asleep this way. Like I said, no expert would ever agree with me-but it worked for us!

More Answers

It may not be just the sucking that is helping. Maybe she is really hungry. Try putting cereal in her bottle at night to thicken it and fill her for longer. Also, if you have not tried the Soothie pacifiers (available at walmart or target), try them! They are shaped more like a bottle nipple and they are the only ones both of my kids would use. Good Luck!

1 mom found this helpful

I am so sorry for what you are going through. My body has started to have real trouble because of lack of sleep with the little ones (4, 2, and 9 months). The dynamic of the apartment situation makes it even harder. I would encourage you to do whatever you have to (within reason) in order to get some sleep. If you can hire a sitter and sleep, do it. if you can use family, do it. Definitly check out "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child". But get the more recent additions. At this point for your health, I would even agree with the post to throw out the rules (within reason). If you let her sleep with a bottle (against all advise) that's okay! If you can try to co-sleep, that's okay. It's better for your baby to have a bit of sugar on her teeth at night, than a mom who falls asleep at the wheel, etc. If you use the Healthy Sleep book, it will guide you to how to schedule her. This should help. Also you can let her cry it out early in the evening 6-8:00, and then tend to her at night. This practice at night and naps may help her do better at night. Please do what you can to take care of yourself. I wish I could help you out. Can you husband (if you have one) help at all?

1 mom found this helpful

My son went through the same phase and Crying it out did not work for us at all. Oh I let him cry, first night 5 hrs, second night 3 hours, third night 2 hours and he threw up, fourth night 20 min and he hrew up then continued to cry for the rest of the night. fifth night......etc. we tried consistantly every night using the method from healthy sleep happy child, and a few other books. After two weeks I had had enough. I moved my son to a fold out foam couch on the floor, super babyproofed his room, shut the door and used a monitor......HE SLEPT!!!! He slept there every night through the night soothing himself to sleep till he was 15months when I finally bought his big boy twin bed. We had a problem again after my daughter was born and he was almost 20months so now he sleeps with music. I know "they" say not to, however my philosophy is whatever works. I need to be rested to be a good mom. If mama's not happy, no one is.

1 mom found this helpful

the solution is simple, but it is complicated by the apartment living. however, you and everybody who can hear her will get more sleep if you let her cry it out. Not just at night, but also for naps during the day. Let the neighbors know what you are doing, leave a note in the lobby and explain that she will be crying a lot for a day, but then she will be able to go down without crying. Stop doing those things that prepare her for sleep time, i.e. rocking, back rubbing, waiting until she actually falls asleep. Even though she's only 11 mos tell her, and yourself at the same time, in a soft voice that now she is going to learn to go to sleep by herself. Then, at nap time, just lay her down, walk out of the room as confidently as you can, and set a timer or check your watch for 5 min to pass when she starts crying. Then duck your head in and at the most say softly, "It's time to sleep" or say nothing at all. Now wait 10 minutes. If she's still crying, duck in your head and hopefully she will see you and begin to really cry. This will wear her out. Set the timer for 15 min, and duck your head in again. Then just let it go. If she starts tosleep but is doing that little gasping thing, like she is softly crying, in her sleep, don't worry about it. She will most likely be asleep now, and you may have to repeat this sheme for her next nap or bedtime. You may have to repeat it if she starts waking up in the middle of the night again at some time in the future. And you will have to repeat it if she gets sick and you care for her through the night. If this does not work in 2 days time, write us again, or tell your doctor. Also, keep track of how much time she actually cries and you will see it decreasing and can say this to any neighbor who complains.

1 mom found this helpful

C.:

Yes, doing all that sleep training is all good and fine IF you have the energy to do so. Please try to take all this in stride. I have a little one who has been a terrible sleeper (most of the time) since day one. I've tried it all w/little success. You need to do what is best for you and what your gut tells you. Co-sleeping may be what she needs, maybe more food. Do what your maternal instincts tell you and try not to focus on what "society" tells you is the right thing (ie crying it out). I find myself getting very caught up in what I think my child "should" be doing at the moment-which creates more stress. Many other societies co-sleep and it's the norm. I have rheumatoid arthritis and I empathize w/your stress, pain and lack of sleep. Once you are in a better place, then you can consider other methods to get her sleep through the night. My daughter didn't really sleep through until 14 months..and we are still battling it from time to time. Hang in there and take care of yourself. I hope this is helpful.

J.

1 mom found this helpful

I totally agree with the previous post. If you let her cry it out, you'll be surprised how quickly she learns to put herself back to sleep. We had to do this at some point with both kids. I'm sure the first night will be awful, but it will improve SO quickly. Good luck and stay strong...in the long run, she really will be better off if you don't go in the room.

I have a question... when does she get up from her last nap then go down for the night? Does she get a bottle before bed or how long after dinner does she go down for the night?
I would suggest for example if you put her down for the night at 730 then feed her at 6.. so she's satisfied as she goes down. Also make sure she is good and tired.. no more sleeping past 3pm. That way she's had a good 4 1/2hrs of activity, eating and bath time to prepare her for a good nights sleep. Just for good measure.. a bit of painreliever 1/2hr before sleep.. to take any edge off the teeth pain in order for her to get in a deep sleep. Do you have any noise for her? We play music all night to drown out noise and give them something to trigger sleep, help them relax and let their unconscious know it's still night time.
Good luck & God bless.

Have you tried giving her a bottle with just water in it at night when she wakes up. My son just started sleeping through the night and he is 14months. and I tried everything the books say... it may just take time. Now I am back to an infant!

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