Sleep Advice Needed

Updated on July 27, 2007
M.J. asks from Osseo, MN
11 answers

My 6 1/2 month old does not sleep through the night. She typically wakes up one to two times a night (often screaming) and barely sleeps 8 hours combined for the night and often will only nap a total of 1 1/2 hours a day. I have read that at her age they should typically be sleeping about eleven hours a night. It seems like I have tried everything, giving her cereal before bed, establishing a nighttime routine, letting her cry when she wakes up a little longer each night, giving her water instead of milk when she wakes up. Nothing seems to work and I am sleep deprived because of it! Any help would be wonderful!

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B.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Oh goodness, forget what those books say. I think its quite normal for a 6 month old to wake up once or twice a night. I know many babies (my own included) who did not sleep completely through the night until they were more than a year. If your baby cries, nurse her or give her a bottle quietly and quickly (or if she's really not hungry, just snuggle her a bit and give her a comfort object like a pacifier or blankie). Then settle her back in for sleep and go back to sleep yourself. I would put the emphasis on getting you and baby back to sleep as quickly as possible. Do whatever you can to accomplish that. I do think a six month old should be sleeping for a good 12+ hours at night, but that doesn't mean they don't wake up briefly during those hours for some milk.

Good luck!

B.

1 mom found this helpful
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P.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

I totally agree with Bridget. Neither of my children slept solid through the night at 7 months old. My kids are 4 and 2 now and I routinely sleep through the night. (Not always, because even when they are old enough to sleep all night, they will get a cold, or cut teeth, or other things that result in disruption for my sleep.)

There is too much stress on parents to get their baby to sleep through the night. You know what I'm talking about. That question you are always asked, "Is he/she sleeping through the night?" And the parents who seem to love to say, "My baby slept through the night from the time I brought him/her from the hospital." Great... mine didn't and I went through a lot of stress the first months of their lives because I felt I was failing as a parent because I couldn't get them to.

Whether your child sleeps solid through the night does not reflect on whether you are a good or bad parent. Some kids sleep... some kids don't. Some parents chose to let their child cry themselves to sleep... some don't. Some parents can sleep through the crying... some (like me) just wish they could.

Just keep doing what you think is best, do what you can to get her back to sleep as fast as possible. Once she gets a little older, and starts to walk and run, she is going to be tired enough at night to sleep. My dad once told me, "you'll sleep plenty when you are dead." He's right. Believe me, you are not going to believe how fast it goes after you survive that first year.

Good luck.

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C.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi M.,
My son probably started sleeping completely through the night at about 10 months old after I got advice from a doctor and slowly wheaned him into the routine. I use to give him a bottle right before putting him down so he was pretty much asleep and then would fall asleep the rest of the way in the crib. Which I think that is a good start though to get him familiar with falling asleep partially on his own. The doctor told me to give him a bottle and then brush his teeth and then put him down, this way they aren't falling asleep with a bottle and will learn that they don't need a bottle to fall asleep.(You could read a book or something too) I slowly did different things to help him with this, everytime I layed him down after the bottle I would say Nigh, nigh. But one night I just gave him his bottle and he was falling asleep and I brought him out to brush his teeth, then I went back in his room, gave him a kiss, layed him down and said nigh, nigh. He whined/cried for about 5 to 10 minutes. Then it got less and less each night( I think the second night was a minute). The water thing helped for a little while when he was younger, but this honestly is the only thing that completely worked for us. If she wakes up during the night, let her cry for at least 10 minutes, just listen to the cry after that and try to decipher on what kind of cry and if she may be calming down.(Personally I think if it has been 30 minutes they aren't falling asleep, but listen to the cry) That doctor also told me to let my son cry until he fell asleep or he wouldn't learn, he would always expect us to come in and help him to fall asleep( I did this to a point like stated before). There are times when you do need to go in there, such as what if she poops,leaks, or is hungry. At those points you just have to go with your gut, maybe peak in there to make sure she isn't caught in the bars. Another thing that may help is to go in there and give her only a small bottle and then lay her down to fall asleep on her own, even if she seems to want more. That also helped me.I hope this all makes sense, I rambled on a little and I didn't proof read. Feel free to email me with any questions.
I really hope this helps!!! I know exactly where you are coming from.

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R.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

Looks like you've gotten some great advice, of course I just wanted to throw my 2 cents in as well :) I also agree with Bridget, that it is totally normal for her to wake up a couple times a night at 6 months. However, it does sound like she may be a little sleep deprived and overtired herself. I know everyone has a favorite book but "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr, marc Weissbluth helped our family create a routine that worked for us. Now that our daughter is 2, she sleeps like a champ, tells us when she is ready for bed and for her nap and everyone is happy. And it is true what the other moms are saying, It won't be long before these sleepless nights and tired days are a distant memory.
One of the great things about this book is that he compares all the other sleep methods and really lets you as a family decide what will work. The most important thing is consistancy and a good nap schedule. When my daughter was about 5-6 months old she started having screaming fits which was so unlike her, I realized she was overtired!! They are getting to be so active at this age and no longer just fall asleep when they need to and they really do need to be taught how to settle down and sleep. the most important nap is the first nap of the day, it should be no lated than 2 hours after they wake up. So, if she wakes up at 6 am, she should be asleep in her crib no later than 8 AM. Which means you would probably start the soothing process about 7:30 (ie feeding, rocking, turn down lights, soft music etc...) At this age she would typically have about a 2 hour period of wakefullness. So if she wakes from her first nap at 9:30 then her second nap would be at 11:30 and so on and so forth. It does take some discipline but once you are on a schedule then everyone will be sleeping so much better and if there does come a time when you miss a nap or get off routine it is really easy to get back on schedule. This book also addresses parents that work full time and how to create schedules around daycare situations. So, it is a much more practical book than a lot that are out there. I highly recommend it!! Good luck to your little family ! Oh, and at 6 months, when she wakes up in the nights, she probably is hungry so 2 feedings a night is very appropriate.

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K.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

At 6 months, my son was still waking up at LEAST twice a night to eat. I also worried that he wasn't getting enough sleep, since he only took 30 minute naps a few times a day. My doctor reassured me that the definition the medical community uses for "sleeping through the night" is 5 hours in a row, so my son was doing just fine.
Now he is 13 months old and he sleeps from 6:30 p.m. to 3:30 a.m., has some water, then a few more hours of sleep. He also takes 2 one-hour naps a day. This has happened without any cry-it-out treatment (we tried that, and it just caused more exhaustion after 2 hour cry sessions in the middle of the night!).
So don't worry about what you're "supposed" to be doing, just do what works for you and your family. I wish you good rest and good luck!

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T.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi M.. Is your Baby teething?? My 1 year old little boy started getting teeth at that age. He would cry in the middle of the night. I started giving him tylenol or ibuprofen before he went to bed and that seemed to help. Where does your baby sleep?? Crib?? Pack and play?? With you?? I always give my son some white noise, like a fan or something in his room. That seems to help. I also would let my son just cry and it was less crying every night. I would keep up with just letting your baby cry for an honest 2 weeks. Stick with it because it works. It did for my son at 4 months. I also work fulltime and need my sleep. Don't break the ferberizing method because then you will have to start over. When your baby crys just soothe her. Don't turn on the lights or keep picking her up. Keep up with the bedtime routine. I know the sleep thing is hard. I've been there. Good Luck...

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B.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

My daughter was like that so I just popped her bottle (water only) in her mouth and had her sleeping with me. I started more bad habits this way, the bottle and sleeping with me but it was the only way for me to keep my sanity and get some sleep. At 2.5 years old I weaned her off her bottle and at 6 years old now she is still in my bed but I really don't care. Since I started all of this we've both been getting plenty of good sleep each night. Just figure out what works for you and do it. My daughter didn't sleep through the night until she was past 2 years old. They are all different. Now she's such a sound sleeper she won't even wake up with the alarm clock blarring.

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S.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

Being sleep deprived makes it really hard to be a mom. My 11 month old use to get up two or three times a night. It's not that he was hungry but rather that he wanted reassurance that I was still close. We have started playing music that has a heart beat mixed in with it and this has helped a ton. Now he is only up once a night and it is cause he looses his nuk. Good luck.

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M.K.

answers from Minneapolis on

The book The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems by Teaching You to Ask the Right Questions really helped us to get our guy sleeping through the night. The author is somewhere in between "cry it out" and "always go to them". It really helped us teach our guy to sleep in his own bed. We got it through the library.
Best of luck!
:) M.

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J.E.

answers from Minneapolis on

If you haven't read it, the book "The Happiest Baby on the Block" was a LIFESAVER for us! It has great techniques for getting babies to sleep that make total sense, and are easy to do. You could also look at BabyWise--it was a fantastic book, too.

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L.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

I had alot of troubles with my baby sleeping as well. He only slept 8 hours in a 24 hour time period for the first 4 months. He was just an extremely alert baby who didn't want to sleep. Months 5 and 6 were really tough. He would wake up screaming in the middle of the night and not stop for 2 hours. I had to stop breastfeeding and put him on Similac Alimentum for babies with colic and protein sensitivity. After he went on the formula, those 2 hour crying spells in the middle of the night went away (finally!) The only time he acted up was in the middle of the night, but the formula was magic for us.

Chin up because it does get better. And believe it or not, those sleepless nights will soon be forgotten. My baby is now 11 months old and sleeps 10 hours straight.

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