Why the Push off of Baby Food?

Updated on February 26, 2009
E.S. asks from Brightwaters, NY
25 answers

My 12 month old daughter still eats baby food along with table food. i feel its an easy way to be sure she gets her veggies. i give her grilled chicken, pasta, low sodiums soups, scrambled eggs and dry cereals , yogurts, along with her baby food cereal, fruits and veggies
unfortunately, i am a working Mom and the baby sitter (my friend and neighbor) does not give her the baby food and is constantly telling me how her children were completely eating table food at 6 months. my other friend and nieghbor is right there with her. I know they are lying when they say she had her veggies while im at work. they also give her too many cookies and pretzels. it makes me very upset but I dont have anyone else i trust with her all day. the food thing is my only issue. Why is it some sort of competition amongst Mothers to see whose kids were off baby food first? frankly, i wouldnt brag about the way their kids eat. Neither of these stay at home Mom's cook healthy home made dinners each night. Their kids drink soda and are chubby.
I still stick to my ways for dinner and on weekends but how long can I give her aby food fruits and veggies if she still eats it?

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So What Happened?

thanks for the imput
as far as the sitter - I trust in so many other ways and i dont have that level of trust in a childcare center. also, i dont fit into the time frame the childcare centers offer (without additional costs i cant afford)
as far as real veggies - ive tried and shes not ready yet. she'll eat everything else in table food except veggies. even with the babyfood, i spoon in a little applesauce to help it go down better. the competition thing is annoying ans obnoxious.

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N.D.

answers from New York on

I fed my babies baby food for lunch until they were old enough to want to feed themselves and then I gave them Campbell's vegetable soup. I would drain off the liquid while in the can, fill it back up with water, heat the veggies and then drain off the water. This way I got rid of all the salt. My kids loved to pick up the little food morsels and also learned to like veggies.
You are her mom and can ask the baby sitters to give her baby food, but perhaps they are too busy (lazy) to sit and feed her. If she has finger foods, she can feed herself. But as long as she is getting a nutritious breakfast and dinner I wouldnt worry too much.

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A.S.

answers from Albany on

My child is 16 months old and I still give her baby food. She has allergies to milk and eggs and its easy to do that. Plus, the calcium as well. Do not worry about what age, the baby will tell you. Do what you think is best and not worry about anything else. If the baby sitter wont feed it to her, or thinks its not right. I would not take them there. I would have the conversation with her, of what you want. I would not worry about it. I learned to do the best you can and don't listen to that. My child is still on a bottle and I don't care what people say about that. She also doesn't use a pacifier and there are 4 year olds that do. I think what is best for you, is what you should do, take care.

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M.B.

answers from New York on

I still give my daughter Earths Best baby food along w/ table food if I feel she is not eating enough table veggies. She is 21 mos old. My Dr. says there is nothing wrong w/ it as long as it's ALONG w/ table food, not solely eating baby food. And as long as they like it why not. Don't stress about it. There are too many other things to stress about in this world!

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D.D.

answers from New York on

There's mom competition with everything. I've found that if your child walks at 10 months someone else will say that their's walked at 9. Of course another mom will chime in that he's walked at 6 and yet another will claim that her's walked out of the womb and actually cut his own cord. Motherhood is filled with it.

The other mom is telling you that all kids are off baby food because she doesn't want to be bothered with spoon feeding your kid when she can just shove a cookie at her and go back to talking with her friend on the phone. Just continue to feed your child as you wish and don't worry about what everyone else does. Trust your own mom instincts to do the right thing.

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H.G.

answers from New York on

Your babysitter is being completely inappropriate. It is her job to follow your instructions to the T!

No matter what her beliefs regarding food, it's unbelievable to me that she would try to tell you how to feed and raise your daughter.

My own kiddo stopped baby food before 12 months, but who cares??? If your baby likes it, why shouldn't you give it to her! I wish I could get my 13 month old to eat veggies! :) There are plenty of 12 month old babies eating baby food still, and you have no need to defend yourself. Your concern about them giving her cookies and pretzels is also an issue- because you should be able to trust your sitter completely! It's not about the snacks or food choices- it's about trust!

I'm sorry, but I think you should kick her to the curb. It's just not fair to you, to add this extra stress into your life...

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V.M.

answers from New York on

You can give her baby food for as long you are happy and comfortable doing so. It certainly won't harm her in any way. This is YOUR child, do what you feel comfortable with and don't apologize to anyone for it.

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J.P.

answers from Syracuse on

For as long as you want. Do not listen to what anyone else says. You know what is right for your family. As long as you are giving your baby a variety of foods in her diet it doesn't matter. If she still likes it and will eat it I do not see a problem with it. They day care person is probably just not wanting to spoon feed her and chooses to give her table foods she can feed herself so she doesn't have to take the time to do it. I would start looking for a new day care provider if she is not going to follow your dietary wishes. I still cook with baby food. I use the fruits in cupcakes and cake recipes as it makes for a moister cake and adds more flavor than regular apple sauce!!!

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D.S.

answers from New York on

Dear E.,

I agree with Diana about the competition thing however I do not agree with you trusting your daughter in this women's care. If she is not doing what you ask as far as feeding her what makes you think she will listen to all or any of your requests down the line. She is going to raise your baby as she does hers and that type of person is not who I would want raising mine. I own a childcare center and whatever a mom asks from us we do. That is what they are paying us for to assist them in raising their kids not to instill our beliefs. And trust me I have older children and have done many things differently, however we do honor their wishes. If they tell us no pacifier, then no pacifier, as long as it is reasonable and within my means I make sure my staff does as they were asked to. I would not trust this women she seems to be to strong willed and determined to undermine you. Get your daughter into a childcare center where she can also learn, have structure, and be cared for the way you want her to be. Good luck!!

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K.K.

answers from New York on

I see no problem with letting her have baby food, but you may find that one day she flat out refuses it. My son decided at about 11 months that he didn't want to be fed from a spoon anymore - he swats at your arm as you approach, so we've found a variety of fruits and vegetables that he can and will eat. I'm not clear on whether your daughter has refused self-feeding fruits and veggies, but it may be a good idea to work on finding some fruits and veggies that your daughter will self-feed in case she refuses the spoon and because it may make her more interested in fruits and veggies in the future. Some of my son's self-feeding favorites are:
peas
cooked carrots (out of a home-made soup or stew)
cooked spinach (seasoned with some soy sauce and sesame oil)
soybean sprouts (same seasoning)
strawberry
pineapple
pears
peaches
kiwi
banana

It sounds like you're having trouble managing the friend / sitter relationship, which is understandable, so that may be another reason to get your daughter eating some of these fruits and veggies. If you can't trust the sitter to feed her baby food, this may be the only way to ensure she gets a well-balanced meal.

Good luck!

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J.C.

answers from New York on

Hi E.,

My daughter will be 3 in May and she still eats baby food on occasion. She has a very healthy diet and normally eats her share of good foods. But she at times wants her baby food (only one kind - Earth's Best Turkey Dinner). So I will give it to her with applesauce and a veggie. It's healthy and I know that she is good to go. I am a FT working mom so I even will give her some if it's for convenience reasons as a last resort!

Don't sweat it. As long as your daughter is getting a good balance of nutritious foods, you're fine giving her baby foods sometimes.

In terms of your sitter - it may help for you write down a meal and snack plan. Leave room for a check off box (for her to check when your daughter eats the food) and a section for other foods given.

Good luck!

C.B.

answers from New York on

She can eat baby food for the rest of her life. It won't hurt her in any way. The junk food will, as you know. I would stand your ground. Just say thank you for your opinion but I'm the mom and really want you to feed her as I would like. On the other hand, she is bound to want what the other kids around her are eating. Maybe you could ask the sitter to limit the goodies to just a taste. Hope that is helpful.

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M.T.

answers from New York on

Hi E.,
Have the doctor write a note stating that due to food sensitivities, your daughter must only eat the food that is sent from home. This may be easier than saying "I don't agree with your parenting choices when it comes to kids and foods"
When my daughter was an infant, I wasn't thrilled that she was about 10 months old and I saw a picture our sitter took of her eating a lollipop, something that I never, ever would have given to a baby.

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B.P.

answers from New York on

I have noticed too that some moms like to brag about their kids eating table food. I too find that the jarred baby foods, especially the Earth's Best are nutritionally balanced and are a great way to start off a meal. Then the baby can eat table food. I can completely understand your annoyance, especially because the sitters kids sound unhealthy so who is she to spread advice. If I were in your shoes, make the feeding situation for your child as easy as possible so the sitter will not grab the junk because the food you bring is too complicated. Again, reiterate to her in a non confrontational and non judgemental way the manner you wish your child to be fed. I think your baby will eat the baby food for some time longer, especially the stage 3. My son is 11 months and really enjoys the stage 2.

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A.H.

answers from New York on

don't push her off baby food just yet. my husband pushed me to get my son off baby food at about 11 months. He used to eat great on baby food.. all veggies, fruits... Once he started on whole food and until now.. age 12.. he still doesn't eat fruit or veggies. Once in a while he'll take a grape or 4 or 5 peas!! but that's it. a nightmare of a eater. he is on many sports.. so he is thin.. but he is meat and potato man. My daughter - I kept her on baby food until she was about 22 months.. but I used to give her all kinds of veggies.. like cucumbers, lettuce, corn, asparagus, tomatoes... and tons of fruit. she is 10 and loves all sorts of foods. If I had to do it over again.. I would prolong the baby food and make sure she or he gets a lot of whole food thats good. tell your babysitter... you want her or him to eat only what you send. One or two cookies a day is enough.. get baby cookies or baby snacks they are more healthy.... and tell them that's how you want it. You lay down the rule.. you have to .. it's your child. good luck

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M.B.

answers from Rochester on

E.,

Oh MY GOODNESS! If these people are giving your child sweets instead of what you ask for - can you re-evaluate your sitting situation?

baby food is FINE! There is nothing wrong with it - in fact some babies have a really hard time with stuff that isn't pureed - like green beans, spinach, and other fibrous stuff. My son has horrible pain and gas with green beans (which only recently started to affect him, don't know why).

Oh my, I just cringe when I think you baby is receiving things you don't want her to have, and not receiving what she needs.

Good luck,
M.

PS: She CAN have veggies for breakfast - or whatever meal she is with you - so if you know she isn't getting something, you can make up for it earlier, or later.

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K.H.

answers from Utica on

Hi E.
Sounds like you want things your way and it is not happening. I am so sorry about that. I am also sorry that you think that there is some kind of competition amongst moms. No two children in the same house eat the same way, especially at 12 mo. Some kids have moms that are in a hurry to get them off baby food because it is expensive, some because they think it is unhealthy, some because they think it means their children are grown up. Wrong on all counts!
Sounds like your baby is eating, and enjoying whatever is put in front of her. Yes? That is good. No child goes by the book, they are average children so some must be sooner and some later to get there. I had one that hated to eat. Still does. Then you have a bigger problem, trust me.
Are you sending all her food with her? Then you would know exactly what was not eaten. Sometimes telling the sitter not to clean up the dishes etc, just put them in a plastic bag or lunch box and you'll handle the mess, is also a good way to know what was not eaten. As far as too many cookies, how do you know?
You are giving your child a healthy life and life style as you feed them healthy foods.
You must feel threatened by their comments or there would not have been a need to justify your statements with what is happening with their children.
Refrain from anger and be thankful you have people you trust to care for your children. Some are not so fortunate.
None of mine were eating table food at 6 mo, or 9 mo, maybe at a year as I remember they all knew how to dive into their birthday cake.(I make cake from scratch, not box) and you'd be surprised how good frosting is made from just unsweetened jam and cream cheese.
I read boxes, and labels and chose what I thought was best. I was the baby sitter so when people sent their children with corn curls as their lunch I fed them from my cabinet and shared the corn curls with everyone. I was thankful when I didn't have to clean each kids mess. Putting it all back into the lunch box was a snap. I had nothing to hide as they ate what they ate and there was nothing I could do about it. Most of the kids I sat for were 2 & up so can't say much about 12mo.
God bless you as you make decisions
K. SAHM married 38 years --- adult children 37, coach; 32, lawyer, married with son 6 mo.; and twins 18, in college, journalism major 3.8GPA, and fine arts major 3.7GPA. I feel their health and their bright minds are in direct correlation with the healthy start with healthy foods.

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J.E.

answers from Rochester on

Hi E.! Congratulations for giving your child a great start with healthy eating! My daughter is 13 months and she still eats about half of her veggies in baby food and all of her fruits. She will not take even canned chunks of fruit yet. I continue to offer them but until she decides that she will eat them I will give her baby food. It is "real" food after all, just pureed! I would rather her eat that then not have a healthy diet. Do not let anyone make you feel like you are wrong. There are many ways to do things when it comes to raising a child. That doesn't mean that one way is any better than another. As far as I see it, you are doing what is right and healthy for your child. Bring the baby food to the sitters and insist that she gets it. You are paying her after all, she should respect your wishes. Good Luck!

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K.G.

answers from Jamestown on

I would reiterate to the sitter that you want her to be fed the baby food....if that's what you really want.
At this age, I would think that you could just cook up some veggies and let her eat them like that. For example, green bean, you can keep them long and cook them to tender. She should be able to bite them. Or you can cut them up small for her if she needs bite size pieces. Same with carrots.

If she is eating all the other foods without any problems, it shouldn't be too hard to get her onto regular veggies as long as you cook them and cut them the right size.

I can not believe that a 6 month old wouldn't be eating baby food... unless she means she made her own. I rarely used premade baby food with my kids, but I did use a food processor to make my own for them. There is no way a 6 month old can eat food that isn't through a processor.

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A.M.

answers from New York on

First of all, you need to put your foot down and tell them to feed her nothing that isn't pre-approved by you!

You want to maintain her enjoyment of the taste of veggies like peas, carrots and green beans. If she's not crazy about eating them steamed yet it's most likely becasue of the texture. Keep feeding her the baby food version and try the real thing every couple weeks until she accepts them. Or cut up a few small chucks and add them to the baby food.

One of my overall parenting philosophies is "don't fix it if it isn't broken". Too often I've felt like parents push their kids to do something they aren't ready for (like this, or giving up the bottle or moving out of the crib, etc, etc). Some kids are ready but others are not. Every kid is different. And my daugther is now an awesome eater and a champion sleeper. Of course she goes through stages when she's not as hungry or tired but I often realize later that they coincided with a growth spurt. So be patient and let her needs guide you. You know best.

On a side note: I mentioned what a "skinny-minnie" my daughter was in front of her daycare provider the other day and she said "it's no wonder"! She'd rather have a rice cake with peanut butter and a side of cantelope than just about anything else in the world. She begs me for cake and candy and takes one or two bites and leaves the rest. It's worth the effort to instill good habits now! It's the same with the sleeping. I just told a friend over the weekend that my daughter still takes 2 hour naps on the weekend. She's 4. Her 3 year old daugher hasn't napped in a while. Again, all kids are different. But I kept Cassie in her crib until she was 3. She learned that it was absolutely unacceptable to climb out and that she was to call me and wait until I came to get her. And, of course, I was responsive to her. But she felt safe there and is still in the toddler bed the crib transformed into. We're just getting ready to move her into another room where she'll be in a full bed. Again, why fix something that isn't broken?

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M.M.

answers from New York on

Hi E.,

The only reason I would move away from baby food- especially if it comes in a jar, is that at 12 months, she might really enjoy the variety of taste, color and texture. It is also better for her system to take on the fiber of raw vegetables and fruits.
In terms of care takers, one of the great time savers for me was a hand held blender. I would steam vegetables, or cook them, and then blend them. That way I could control the amount of crunch or texture, if you will, my kids were getting. I could make 8-10 4 oz pots of vegetables, either mixed, or individual, and have them in the fridge. The sitter could feed them right out of the little container, or warm them up with something else. (But don't heat plastic containers with veggies in the microwave!) And homemade veggies freeze well! So you don't have to cook everyday.
Your child gets better variety, far less salt, and it is cheaper than buying the stuff from the store.
In terms of the competition, eating foods by 12 months won't get them into college. Neither will early potty training. Children develop as they need to.

And, Frankly, I would put a total stop to the cookies and prezels. They rot teeth, hurt their metabolism, and stains their taste for good foos over the long haul because those foods are FILLED with corn syrup, modified startches, trans fats and artifical flavors and colors, not to mention salts.
She is your child. It is great that a neighbor and friend can help out. SO, sit down with this friend and read through the ingredients. Talk about what you want for your child, and ask her to help you make it happen.

Good Luck! Sounds like a bit of a sticky situation.
M.

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R.H.

answers from New York on

Absolutely hold your guns!! That is your baby. I am the exact same way. And it is not unfortunate that you have to work, you are doing what you gotta do, it is unfortunate that you have someone controlling your baby's diet in a negative way. My daughter is now 27 mths. I still give her the gerber veggies(green beans and peas) and she eats applesauce,(that's not baby food). She won't eat cut up table food greens or salad which is always offered and it is the only way I know she is getting it. I refuse to force feed her. I open the lid and she eats it herself, I think she likes the texture of it.
It is not just the push off of baby food, also off the bottle too. It doesn't matter when they start drinking from the cup and those sippy cups operate much the same way a bottle does anyway. My two girls are 11 yrs. apart and I remember leaving my first one on the bottle for a lot longer than I did with my second. It also is the same for potty-training and almost any other developmental milestone. You are right it is a competition, not just one you have to deal with, but all of us mothers and as ridiculous as it seems, against eachother. It sounds like you know what your doing and you'll know when to stop.

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A.G.

answers from New York on

There is no push to get her off baby food as long as she eats it. My kids hated it and only ate it about a month and then finding ways to feed "toothless grins" healthy without choking was harder. Your lucky she eats baby food. We as moms always seem to compare our kids and what they do. Don't let it get to you. You do however need to sit down with her care takers and tell them that you are trying to stick to a specific diet for her and here is what she can and can't have (insert list of both here). I had to do that with a care giver for my daughter and since it has cut back on the "food" problems. You are her Mom and it is your decision what she eats and as long as you are supplying the food they should respect your wishes and feed her as YOU want. Good Luck. A.

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J.D.

answers from New York on

I'd give the baby foods as long as she will eat them! My son gave them up on his own, wanted no parts of them. I was bummed! Tell your babysitter she HAS to give them, period and she has to lessen the cookies and pretzels too. There is no rush, if you daughter likes them and wants them, then keep them going as long as you can! It seems after the baby foods, theres an aversion to fruit and veggies so the longer the better in my opinion! For some reason there are always people who just want to give your child JUNK and rush them in life -push them to crawl, push them to walk, push them to eat table food. SLOW DOWN people! I think you are doing great - just be stern with your desires for her! : ) The competition - SO ANNOYING - just ignore that, like many things, other parents will tell you they have it so much better, easier, perfect - I just don't talk to those people anymore! LOL!

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C.P.

answers from Rochester on

I agree with you. If your daughter will eat the baby food let her. I don't know why anyone would be happy to have a kid on regular food at 6 months. As long as she is trying new textures & chewing solids who cares if she is eating some baby food. Do what you feel is right for your family.

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P.M.

answers from New York on

Personally I feel at 12 months, the baby food is not needed. I know kids who would not eat regular food because they stayed on baby food too long, so I am not a huge fan of baby food. I started my son on solids around 4 months, but never anything unhealthy and never soda!!! It sounds like you are already giving her all the right foods, so why not try the veggies steamed as well? I think since you really trust these women, you can have a heart to heart about the food thing. Maybe you can send her the foods you want her to eat rather than leaving it up to them. My son is in daycare now, and I (along with other parents) send lunch and snacks everyday. My son never ate the typical baby stuff like mac n cheese, so I do sned in dinner type food for lunch instead like chicken and rice and corn, or steak, cut up with sides. Good luck to you, having trusting child care is everything, and if that is the only issue, you are lucky.

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