Why Can't Kids Quit?

Are these activities optional? Yes. Are they valuable? Yes.

My daughter and I started training in karate when she was 5. I have earned my black belt and she is now two steps away from the same (brown belt with black stripe) at age 10. Does she love to go to class? No. Does she love karate as much as I do? No. Does she want to quit? No. Because she told me "If I quit now, I'd always know that I didn't finish." Bingo. That's an important lesson to be learned. Once she earns her black belt, she will stop going to karate and continue with other activities that she likes more. If she had HATED it when she was 5 or 6, I wouldn't have made her keep going. If she didn't excel in it (which she does) this may have also gone differently.

The lessons she's learned in karate - the body awareness, strength, balance, and concentration - have helped her do well in other activities. Circus is her new latest favorite! And she recognizes that.

She is taking piano lessons. She also does not love this. BUT, the musical ability she is learning has made learning to play the tuba (which she does love) faster and easier, and now that her piano skills allow her to play more complex pieces, she is enjoying playing more.

I don't believe in forcing children to take lessons or be in a sport. But, the lessons it is possible to learn from these activities are valuable - focus, skill, and especially accomplishment. Accomplishments don't always come easily, they take time, energy, work, and persistence.

I think the point is that kids learn a lot beyond just the activity they are in. It's important for kids to learn to finish what they start, to work through anxiety and frustration that often comes in the early part of anything new, and to not be flaky. Good life skills taught here.

You mention following through as part of a team or finishing out a season or session. This is what I see most people do. I don't know anyone who forces their kid to continue years on end in an activity they hate. That's pretty Tiger Mom and I just don't know anyone like that. So I agree with you there, but I don't see people who push their kids for years.

hmm for some kids i think its diferent

my daughter is the kind of kid who gets very nervous up front and will declare she's not going to do anything because she's afraid of being mocked.

she loved playing baseball at home, enrolled her at the local place and she decided she HATES being watched because she's afraid people will laugh and wanted to quit. ii made her stick out the season because she needed to learn everyone makes mistakes and its OK...and also needed to learn team skills. this year if she doesnt want to sign up again...thats fine

karate- she tried one lesson HATED it and i could see why and we never went back

irish dance- shes in her 5 week and wanted to quit before she started, cried going in, left and LOVED it, 2nd lesson, same thing didnt want to go wanted to quit...third a little less resistance because she knew she was J. nervous and would like it, 4th-excited to go

so for my kid she needs to be forced a bit or she';d do nothing. BUT if she decides after a season and after my money isnt involved she doesnt want to continue i'm fine with that

i dont know if that makes sense or not

she wants piano lessons. i know the second it isnt fun she'll say I"M QUITTING...but i also will "force " her to do it a few more weeks to see if she really is nervous and likes it or really doesnt like it

she's 6 and shy . i assume when she's older i will J. trust her words more

Thank you for posting this question.

Moms who think kids shouldn't quit, I hope you open your mind to everything Mamazita just said.

IMO, people think kids shouldn't quit because they are overly vested in some vision they have about who their kids should be, and it's more about THEM than about their kids.

I'm guilty of it too -- I wanted my musically gifted son to be a rock star; I wanted my daughter to be a dancer, I wanted my other son to be an artist, I wanted them all to excel at a sport. They all did a little of those things, and now they are being the people they were meant to be. It's hard to see them give those things us. Just this morning, as a matter of fact, I was looking at that guitar sitting there untouched, and wistfully pondering the road not traveled. And in regard to dance: I remember the last year my daughter danced, and watching her on stage, you could see in her dancing that her heart was not in it. Her dancing lacked the energy and vibrancy it had in previous years.

By all means push your kids to try things, and don't let them waste your money, but let them quit when they decide it's not for them, for pete's sake. At ten years old, you can have a meaningful discussion with your daughter about what role she wants dance to play in her life, if any, and let her decide. In addition, what if there is something that she is even BETTER at, that she will not get the chance to try, if all her time is funneled into dance?

Life is about trying things. If your kid begs you to play soccer, for example, and has you pay to sign him/her up for the season, then okay, make him/her play out the season before quitting. At least s/he will get some exercise. But after years of dance, I think the kid knows when she's done.

People have to be internally motivated. You are never going to force your kid to be something s/he doesn't want to be.

And p.s. - If your kid quits, and then realizes she really does want to dance, she can always start dancing again, with renewed enthusiasm and commitment.

We let the sks try many things, but they had to stick it out for the duration. No quitting in the middle of a season or show. No quitting when there were three lessons left. It's not just about follow through. It's also about honoring your parents' time and financial commitment. SD did riding lessons for a year or year and a half and decided not to sign up again. It was fine with us. She wasn't ever going to be competitive. But had she wanted to stop in the middle of lessons where we couldn't get a refund? No. We also made SS stick through the end of the season on sports and told him if he couldn't commit to the whole season, he shouldn't try out. If a child has taken x lessons in piano and no longer wants more, then I'd let him/her stop after a duration. The flip side is I wouldn't invest in an expensive instrument unless the kid was really passionate about it. We rented SD's trombones for a reason.

Further, the sks could pick an activity, but they couldn't just play video games after school. They needed to do something outside of homework and vegging out.

When they were young, they wanted to try everything. So I let them. We spent a fortune in soccer cleats, lacrosse sticks, baseball bats, gymnastics leotards, ballet slippers, ice skates, paint brushes and all the accessories that go along with trying everything out there and the lessons themselves. I was happy to do it, as long as they wanted to do it. However, there WERE several times where I pre-paid for the season and 2 practices in, they decided "I don't waaannnaa go anymore!" Well, too bad, you're sticking it out for the season.

Now that they're a bit older, I've taken a different approach. Since there's nothing that THEY truly love or are super good at, and given the choice, they'd rather sit on their butts on the iPad, I'VE decided their activities for them. My son does karate twice a week and takes guitar lessons. The girls currently swim on a team (the BEST exercise EVER) and play tennis (I play tennis and someday, when they get good, we'll play together). They play piano. My older daughter has chosen to play the violin in her school orchestra as well.

They complain sometimes. I don't care. It's an investment in their future. Karate is perfect for my special needs son - it grounds him and works him out at the same time. When his body feels good, his mind follows. Check out some tennis courts sometime - you'll see REALLY OLD people playing. You can play tennis 'til the day you die. Swimming? That's great exercise whether you're 5 or 55. And piano is a no brainer. I'd rather push them to do stuff they don't want to do, because the alternative is them sitting at home watching TV. If they're not motivated themselves, it's my job to motivate them. In fact, I'd say that getting them to move their bodies and stay strong and healthy is *more* important than getting perfect grades. Being able to play a musical instrument will bring them joy for the rest of their lives. Their grades are just fine for now, not perfect, but just fine, so luckily that hasn't been an issue.

It's a busy schedule and it might seem like there's no downtime for them, but somehow, they still manage to spend a LOT of time on that darn iPad. And they're happy, well-adjusted kids, so we'll keep doing what we're doing for now. So, no, they're not allowed to quit.

My sister hardly ever followed through on activities until she was older.

My mom did not have much money and so it was always a big sacrifice for us to be able to participate. My mother did not make us do these things, we asked and had to make a good request.

My sister would throw a fit. She would beg and beg. My mother would inform my sister that if she started these activities, she would need to finish.

Her responsibilities at home that would go along with the agreement. Clean her room, help clean on Saturdays, mow a 1/3 of the lawn,. baby sit. Blah, blah, blah..

And then it would be great until my sister got bored. Or didn't like the other people, or wanted to sleep in. Or did not like practicing.. this went on and on. Cello lessons, tap, ballet, softball, gymnastics, girl scouts..My mom even had to go and pick my sister up from camp on the 3rd day!!!!!

My sister was just so inconsolable. Once she got home, she talked about being bored. Blah, blah, blah. I could have killed her. I knew my mom had taken on extra work and put of some dental care she really needed and my sister told me "I don't care".I wanted to come home.

I guess in a way this is still going on. She has stuck by her children and adores them, but she would leave one boy friend for another. every time. She even left her husband for another man, but once she was with him, a few weeks later she wanted to go back to her husband so she could live in the house they were having built. Once it was built and she was in the middle of decorating it, she left him again.

And now she has a boyfriend and they have broken up 3 different times.

She did not finish her second semester in college.

My mother was worn down from trying to encourage, prod, force my sister to finish these activities. But my mom worked full time and was raising us the best she could. . But my sister knew if she threw enough of a fit, she would get her way.

If a child really hates something, it is good to listen to them, let them know you understand and make a smaller goal. Ok, I know you do not like this class, but lets just try it till the end of this month. I will use the previous post as an example.

"i know you feel like this teacher is too tough, how about I speak with her?"

"I know you are frustrated because there are other girls that will perform and you will not this, time, but lets still go and you be prepared, just in case someone cannot perform for some reason. "

"I know it hurts, but lets look on line and see if there are other stretches that you can use at home to help you reach this goal."

"Lets look into taking a yoga class together, I heard that will help a person become more flexible and we can do this together!"

Smaller goals that can be reached or at least enough encouragement and trying so in the end you know that you did your best and really tried to be successful.

If my child signs up for an activity then they are to complete that activity. I have never forced my child to do any activity. If they are interested in something I would sign them up. For example, our son did not like flag football. He wanted to tackle and got in trouble if he did. He decided he didn't want to play anymore. I told him that he had to go because his team needed him there and he was part of the team. He went and that was the last time he played football.

If they try something and don't like it, why in God's green earth would I sign them up again? That makes no sense to me.

You wrote that:

"Yes, I get the idea of following through when you are part of a team, or a member of a cast, because other people are counting on you. And yes, I also agree with finishing out a season or a session, because kids need to learn that what they signed up for costs money, and that money should not be wasted. "

I think that most of us who say that a child needs to stick with something agree with exactly what you stated above. I don't know any parents who make their kids do a sport again after they finish a miserable season, or who force dance classes after a miserable year/session. The only time I see parents push a kid to stick with something seems to be a musical instrument. I would imagine that this is because most students eventually hit a part where it's hard or boring, but if they push through that phase, they move onto a level of proficiency and enjoyment that can really open up doors for them (playing in the band or orchestra at school, or performing live) and give them a lifelong skill. Plus, owning that instrument is expensive! You want to make sure you're child really is DONE with the violin before selling it, kwim?

Our rule is that you stay until the session we paid for is done (non-team events) or until the season is over (team sports, theater). My youngest is 6 and he and everyone else is old enough to understand that when they ask to do an activity, they're committing to it. Obviously it's a different story for children who are younger, or who have other issues (Asperger's, sensory issues, behavioral problems etc.).

If a child commits to something they must follow through with that commitment.

I think what you are talking about is when the parent extends the commitment and the child has no say in it. That, I agree teaches the child nothing. I think it has a fair few negative effects.

I also think it is the parents issues. Your kid is good at dance but doesn't like it, why do you make them go back? It has nothing to do with their commitment, it has only to do with you enjoy that people see your child's talent. Sure I have heard the but they were given this talent they shouldn't waste. Give me a break a lot of kids have the same talent what makes it something to grow to adulthood is they also love doing it. Your kid ain't got that, get over it.

I understand that feeling. God I loved watching Christine's great saves. She was beautiful goalie to watch. She used her brain and her body and that was palpable in how she reacted! I loved the look on the other parents face, that's our goalie! I even loved the look on the other teams parents when their hopes for a win were just dashed by my daughter! I loved it but not enough to make her continue when she came to me as a junior in high school and said I want to take a different path.

I probably could have made her keep going just pointing out all the money I had invested in her training. Thing is, being forced, she would not have been the goalie I loved watching. Why would anyone do that to their child?

Meh, rambling, guess I am saying I don't get it either. Don't live vicariously through your children, they are not you and they will point that out if you try.

I think most parents make their children finish something that paid money for, but don't force them to do it again if they don't want to. If we paid money and they wanted to do it, they are finishing the season or whatever is, because they committed to that.

The parents that keep their child in activities they don't want to do are either living vicariously through their kids.

I'm a gymnastics teacher and I have seen all kinds of situations.

I feel bad for the kids who are pushed into doing gymnastics because that's what Mom or Dad want. You can tell they don't really enjoy it and I think that's when injuries happen.

I feel bad for kids who's parents let them just quit because ONE DAY it got a little hard. There are a lot of kids who decide they want to quit because they can't do something instead of pushing through and working for it. Or the kids who fall down one time and get hurt and then never want to go back. Sometimes you fall down. Sometimes you get hurt. You just get back up and try again.

For the most part, the kids usually enjoy the class. Most of the stick it through. Some sign up again and again, and some leave and we never see them again. I know a lot of them get bored with gymnastics and want to try something else and I think it's great that they all try different activities.

I think there is a difference between your child trying something and finding they just don't like it, and a child that likes something but wants to quit when things get hard. It's important to let your child quit when it's not a good match, and it's important to teach your child to push through when things get hard.

I'm of the mind that you finish what you start, but I did allow my SD to quit soccer in the middle of the season. There were a lot of boys on the team and they kick HARD. It got to the point where she didn't want to go because the boys kicked the ball too hard and they played rough. That I can understand. However, when she wanted to quit dance because she didn't get the role she wanted in the dance I didn't allow it. She stuck it through and ended up loving the role she did get.

You really have to take it on a case-by-case basis. I think most of the moms here are NOT the kind to push their kids too far. That's a good thing!

Sometimes it's not the activity itself, but the skills learned. My son hates swim lessons but I'm continuing to sign him up and make him go until I'm satisfied that he has the most basic swimming skills down. It could save his life some day!
I think what you are seeing in general though is a concept that's discussed in the tiger mom book. It goes something like this: Nothing is fun when you don't know how to do it, and children will not voluntarily put the work in to learn things.

I make my kids honour the committment as far as finishing the season or session or whatever, but I wouldn't register them again if they don't want to do it. I don't sign them up for stuff unless I am pretty sure they want to do it and will likely stick with it. Swim lessons are non-negotiable, but I guess those would fall into the personal safety category.

I agree with you, i will not force my kids to participate in anything (optional stuff such as sports, music or dance) that they do not want to do. I am a firm believer in finishing what you start though so if my son wants to play soccer and decides half way through the season he doesnt want to anymore thats just tough finish the season and then you can pick something else to try. I had a friend in high school whose parents forced her to take piano from age 3 until she graduated high school, she hated it and resented them for making her do it for so long.

I feel the same as you!
Ditto!

Anyway, I have 2 kids, and they have their interests. They are both different people. They are signed up for things that THEY like and WANT to do and ENJOY. That is good and nice. Thus, learning it for them, is "fun."

And yes, homework and school work, is a priority and family.

I know some kids, my kids' classmates, that are in things that the parents want them to do. And they go to these activities during the school week, at night... and then they are all stressed because they have to then stay up late at night, doing homework and to catch up. And they are sleep deprived. But they can't quit. I even ask some of those kids, if THEY really like their activities themselves. And they shrug their shoulders and say "I don't know... but I have to." These are kids that range in age from 1st grade to 5th grade.
So that is the flip side to it.

I'm with you. The only thing I made my daughter do despite her reluctance was learning to swim - we lived near a river and I considered swimming a survival skill. I didn't care if she never swam for pleasure. I just wanted her to know how to not drown.

Anything else - music, baseball, theater, dance, scouting, school clubs - she was free to quit if she no longer enjoyed them, even if I had prepaid for them. She understood that if I could not get a refund for prepaid activities, then she could not start another one until the contract for that one had expired, because the extra-curricular budget was already spent.
Funny thing - knowing that she had the option to quit made her more willing to give an activity another chance if there was ANY part of it that she actually liked, because she knew she wasn't trapped in it.

ETA: Re nurturing natural talents. The fact that someone has a natural gift or talent for a particular activity doesn't mean that they will enjoy doing it. It is possible to be very good at something you absolutely hate. If my daughter was a musical genius, but had no desire to study music, I would not force her to take music lessons. If she was naturally athletic, but didn't particularly enjoy any particular sport, I would not make her particiapte in one.
My daughter is highly intelligent - tested both academically gifted and talented (drama). Had she not wished to take accelerated classes in school, I would not have made her do so. Had she not wished to take drama classes, I would not have made her do so. Had she been content to make C's, I would have let her do so, and let her pay the price in terms of lost opportunities for academic scholarships for college. Had she not wished to do her homework, I wold not have made her do so, and would have let her deal with the natural consequences - failing the class and having to take it over.
Life is about choices and learning how to choose well. The only way we learn to choose well is by occasionally choosing poorly and suffering the consequences of those choices.

I agree with you. If we find we dislike something, we quit. Life is too short and she will learn the important skills later.

I am in TOTAL agreement with you here....I often wonder the same thing.

ok you said that you see sticking with it to follow through, team needs you , etc, um why does there have to be more?
It's very normal for a child to start to get antsy in a after school class , sport , etc around this time of year. They all start to feel Christmas break coming on. It happens a lot.
Now, many times a child wants to quit because they find the activity isn't easy for them any longer and they have to actually start working. They don't want to work so they decide they want to quit. They come up with all kinds of excuses of why they want to quit , but when you get right down to it, it's because it's starting to get more difficult and they actually have to practice outside of class or they actually have to work at it.
If you let the child quit half way through the season , you teach them that when things get hard to just give up. That quitting will fix their problems , well it won't.
If my kid stick it out and find at the end of the season they don't want to do it next year then fine, we won't do it, but every time my kids have said they wanted to quit and I've made them stick it out , at the end of the year they can't wait to start next year again.

I totally agree. I have a couple of friends whose kids are involved in a different activity every day of the week. And they are only 6 years old! Good grief!
My son is a homebody, and loves to spend time with us. We have done several different activities (taekwondo, soccer, etc) with our son, but it really wasn't his thing right now. So we don't force it . We have just learned not to sign any long-term contracts to do anything. He doesn't know what he wants to do at his age- his favorite color even changes from week to week. lol
I think in a couple more years he'll have a better idea of what he likes or wants to pursue. But right now, he just loves home and maybe the occasional time limited activity, such as swimming lessons.
I've never understood this do-do-do, go-go-go. Isn't home life just as important? How can these kids and families ever spend time together when they are running around here and there to first one thing or another? How exhausting.

Perspective from the other side.....My parents let me quit. I had to finish the season, but if after that I didn't want to continue I didn't have to. Problem was I was gifted at gymnastics & swimming (told by multiple coaches) but when I got bored I quit. I had real talent, and no one pushed me. By the time I realized I really did want to do the sport it was too late and I was shut out because I had taken so much time off. To this day I regret it. I wish they would have tried something different and helped me develop my talents, but they just let a 10 yo make the decision to not foster that talent.

My son is gifted at soccer. Right now he lives and breathes it. If he decides he's burnt out and wants to quit we'll encourage him to take a break and take skills classes, maybe play rec, kick the ball around at home, then go back to competitive when he feels ready. We will not just let him quit, he has too much talent for that.

Look at it this way - if your child was gifted in school but one day decided they didn't want to try any more, passing with a C was ok by them, would you allow that? Or would you push them to do better? Would you push them to do the best they could, what you know they were capable of doing? Most parents would push, because we want to see our kids develop their talents. Sports, music, art, are no different. Sometimes kids need a breather, but that doesn't mean we let a child decide whether or not it is time to give up on something at which they are gifted.

I agree with you! Well stated!

Totally agree. I even go so far to say that a 5 year old who signed up for soccer and doesn't want to finish the season shouldn't have to bc of the money. They're too young to understand the obligation they were entering into. Of course there are times my kids will say they don't want to go to something and I force them bc I know that usually then they get there and have fun. ie: gymnastics. Happens a lot but when I give them the option of quitting altogether, they don't want to. So there's a balancing act etc but overall I agree with you and I also excel at several things and am very successful professionally vs I'm a "quitter".

How many times has a child of yours begged begged begged to try something.
"Please please please! I'll never ask you for anything ever again!".
(Yeah. Right.)
You spend the money, buy the instrument/uniform/equipment/sparring gear and then 2 weeks later "I don't like it! I don't want to go! I'm tired! I want to quit!"?
Hey - if you've got the money to throw away - more power to you - but I don't enjoy throwing it out the window - it was hard to earn!
But if you make a child stick with it - they just might THINK about something a little harder before they beg for something else on a whim.
Of course - a parent who can't say 'NO' up front sort of sets themselves up for this.
I have to say my son has been very good about this.
He really thinks things through before he asks for anything.
But I know other parents who fall for it hook line and sinker every - single - time.

I basically agree with your premise here. However, children are children and they don't see the big picture. So they'll tend to quit without realizing the long term consequences. As MamaR pointed out, they might find later in life that they wish they had continued so they could participate in something. So, it's a fine line that parents walk. Probably the best way to approach it with most children is to give a timeline.... "keep on with this until _____, and then we'll talk about it again". If you say "____ and then you can quit" that's too definite and doesn't give them an incentive to re-think how they feel about the activity. But saying you'll talk about it again helps them to think about their decision.

Everything that I've signed my daughter up for, was because it was something SHE wanted to try. I've never just signed her up for something without seeing how she felt about it first and so far, she's loved everything (gymnastics, dance, swimming, soccer). She's been asking when she can start piano lessons (she's now 5, I figured when she is 7).

If there was something she really hated and just wasn't a good fit for her, or she had done for a long time but didn't feel any more passion for, I wouldn't make her keep doing it. But I also wouldn't just let her quit part way through the session/season, especially if she had wanted to do it in the first place. Finish it out, and if you never want to do it again, that's fine.

I hate to see kids forced into doing things because deep down, it's more about the parents living vicariously through them than what the kids want. But I also think that some kids need to be pushed a little and encouraged at times, and their reason for wanting to quit needs to be taken into consideration. My daughter wanted to take ballet as well as tap dance this year and has loved both, but then during the 6th or 7th tap class, she accidentally hurt her finger stepping on it with her tap shoe on, and then all of a sudden, she wanted to quit. She whined about it for a few more weeks and said she didn't want to go any more and I told her that she wanted to do this, she had been having fun with it, and getting a little boo-boo on her finger was not enough reason to give up. I also reminded her that sticking with the program for the full year meant she got to wear a cool costume and be in the recital at the end - if she quit now, there would be no costume and recital. Her dance teacher even told her a story about how she once hurt herself riding her bike but that didn't stop her from still riding a bike. That was enough to get her back in the right frame of mind - she hasn't talked about quitting since.

Sometimes kids need to realize that when the going gets tough, the tough get going, and it's a matter of whether they want to feel like they have accomplished something or not. If the end goal doesn't matter to them, and they are not having fun, then you do have to wonder what's the point. On the other hand, I wished my stepsons had been better about sticking with things they went out for, and their mother had been better about teaching them to honor their commitments. Instead they would just have lame excuses like, "I'm just too tired", Mom would let them quit, and now that they are 18 and 19, they are having a hard time setting goals and working toward them - they don't know how it feels to accomplish something and become better at it. They also had a little too much free time on their hands, hung with the wrong crowd, and got into some trouble because of it. Personally, I don't care which activity it is, but do SOMETHING - don't just be a bump on a log. A friend of ours had a daughter in competitive gymnastics for years but when she reached middle school, she felt she had done enough, and also wanted to try new things, like basketball and volleyball. Which she did, and she doesn't regret giving up gymnastics at all - she was still very athletic and enjoyed being part of a team. It wasn't like she just suddenly started sitting around doing nothing.

ETA: I would agree too that swim lessons are essential and would expect a child to get reasonably comfortable around the water and know how to swim, just so they can learn how to stay safe. And sometimes an activity can be enjoyed for a lifetime. My brother and I both took piano and now the piano is at his house and he learns new pieces and plays it all the time - stress reliever!

My kids have been allowed to quit when they aren't enjoying something they wanted to try. Now I will have them finish out the season if it is a sport but otherwise they are free to quit.

I have only made my sons finish things they have joined, things THEY wanted to join. I have never forced them. I only two old enough, but w/ my oldest he harped on me forever to play football. I personally knew in my gut he wasnt going to like it but he wouldn't let up. So I signed him up and sure enough he hated it. BUT if he would've quit his team would have to forfeit every game because he made the number just enough for them to have a team. So I made him finish out the year. The next year he wanted to join a different tougher league. I couldn't believe it. Well I took him to the 1st practice and he of course....hated it! He griped and griped on the way home about how stupid it was etc. So I asked do you want to keep playing? He grumpily said he didn't know. I told it was like this, when you go tomorrow I pay them the check for you playing you WILL finish the season. It's your choice, thankfully he decided to not play.
I don't agree w/ picking things for your kids then making them stick with it. If they ask, then yes they should finish. Forcing them in to music, dance etc you're just asking for resentment. JMO

You took the words right out of my mouth!!!

I do agree with you. I signed my kids up for soccer earlier this year. It was a 8-week season and my daughter really didn't like it. That was fine with me. I made both kids finish the season that I paid for and we didn't sign up again.

I believe that kids should be able to try a variety of different things. If I don't like everything, why should I expect my kids to like everything?

I let my kids quit. In fact, we didn't go to story time this morning because my son didn't want to go. I'm a bit different with activities I pay big bucks for, but I let them miss a class or two. I've also taken to signing them up for cheap activities, so if they don't want to go, I don't feel bad. I'm like you, I want to expose them to things, but sometimes we all have days when we just don't want to do something, and if it isn't all that important, who cares?