What TV Rules Do Others Have in Regards to Exposing Infants?

Updated on July 30, 2008
M.L. asks from Sacramento, CA
11 answers

My husband is staying at home fulltime with our son, now 11 months, and they have a great time playing all day. Intermittently in the day and evening, my husband likes to watch TV in our living room while playing with our son. Our son never used to notice, but will now look at the screen at times. My husband doesn't think it is a big deal, but I really don't want him exposed to TV. I don't have a specific reason- we are very active people and not couch potatoes at all, so I am not concerned about that aspect. I would just not rather he notice TV exists until he is a lot older. I am curious how other people deal with the TV?

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L.R.

answers from Sacramento on

Hi M.,
Our daughter is 3 yrs old now and we still don't watch regular TV around her, except football, which she has always watched with Daddy. When she was a baby we would put on Baby Einstein sometimes, which she loved (still does), Play with me Sesame, and a show called Oobi. I would sit with her and talk about what we were seeing. My niece never watched any TV for the first few years of her life and now is glued to the TV if it is on while our daughter watches some TV but prefers to read or play. We are moderate TV watchers but don't believe in using it as a babysitter.
Sincerely,
L.

PS Our daughter learned her colors, shapes and how to count by 18 months old from watching Baby Einstein and Mickey Mouse Clubhouse!

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L.F.

answers from San Francisco on

M.,

Babies and kids in general are like sponges- they soak up all the information they are given- We didn't allow our baby to watch TV. I don't trust the producers and media that is put on TV- much to violent and believe it or not, they target small children for ads and products that they want to sell. So, its completely up to you, but I believe TV greatly influences children both good and bad-.

Molly

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A.G.

answers from San Francisco on

We don't let our son watch television. At all. There is too much conclusive research out there about the negative effects it has on small children. I would suggest doing your own research with your husband and making house rules based on that research.

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A.C.

answers from Sacramento on

We always let our kids watch 30 minutes of Baby Einstein before the afternoon nap, but otherwise the TV wasn't on when they were infants. I always had plenty to do with them during the day to keep us busy. And I understand how your husband feels because I LOVE TV!!! Keeping my grubby mitts off the remote when the kids were awake was hard, but I found it to be necessary. They took 2 naps a day and if I needed a break with a little TV fix, I'd take it during their naps or after they went to bed at night. Plenty of time for TV, not enough time to be with them while they are babies! I listened to a lot of music during the day.

Now as they are older I like that the TV isn't always on. It's a privilege to watch it and they enjoy that time when they have earned it and I don't have to hear nagging all the time about having the TV on.

That's how it rolled in my house. Best to you as you figure out what works best for your family!

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J.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Everything that an infant sees gets logged in to their tiny brain. Personally, I don't watch things that I wouldn't want my son to see. That's just me though. If I am going to watch a movie or something that is a little more advanced then I wait until he is asleep and watch it then. I just don't want him to see scary images. If he is anything like me then he will also suffer from night terrors and an overactive imagination so I try to not expose him. I do turn on PBS for him in the morning, not that he watches it, but it's a great way for him to continue to hear words and he sees the characters of his favorite stories (Clifford, Curious George and Franklin) come to life. So even though his attention span is about 1 minute, it's on. He gets to watch one baby einstein a day too. As far as something his father would watch... we don't put things on that are too violent or negative images. If your husband is looking for a break or wants to take a shower, I would seriously suggest in investing in Baby Einstein videos. Stick with the first generation ones which are Baby Van Gogh, Baby Monet, Baby Bach, Baby Beethoven, Baby Mozart and Baby Galileo. The ones that come after those are the ones that Disney has made since they bought out the mom who made them and they SUCK! :)

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A.A.

answers from San Francisco on

There are some studies that are beginning to link young children who watch TV and ADD / ADHD. The theory is the fast visual stimulus (it doesn't matter what is on TV) makes it harder for them to focus and/or slow down as they get older.
There is also a belief that it inhibits some of children's creativity / imagination as all these images are being crammed in their minds. It also keeps them from engaging in real life activities with real life learnings and real life joys.
One last thing to consider is developmentally, young children cannot filter out fiction from reality. So anything he sees on TV he will respond to as if it were real.

My girls watched a lot of TV when they were little and one was diagnosed with ADHD and my other has all the symptoms of ADD. We are now a Waldorf family with no TV at all and they have blossomed beautifully. It's taking some time to retrain them to focus, but their imagination has soared and they are much more happy and healthy on so many levels. Honestly, my husband and I don't know how we ever had time for TV!!!

Check out the research for yourself and share with your husband. There's plenty to consider when it comes to youngsters and TV.

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K.G.

answers from San Francisco on

For our son's first year, no TV. During his second year, only Sesame Street. We never watched TV in front of him during his first two years. Year three, PBS shows that didn't drive us nutty :) and a few Playhouse Disney shows, such as Little Einsteins, which he loved (nothing like Baby Einstein videos). We Tivo'd the shows and fast forwarded through any "brought to you by Chuck E. Cheese/Sugar Cereal" promos. We also let him watch some sports but would either mute commercials or tell him that commercials try to make you think you need things you don't actually need (shockingly, this seemed to sink in). I'm a huge TV junkie and never watched when he was awake. It killed me! Maybe your husband could keep the sound off until your son is older. Since my son was about 4.5, I have kept on the Today Show in the morning, even in front of him, unless they're doing the news (too scary) or a story where the topic was something I felt was not appropriate for his age. Pro or anti-TV sentiment aside, I think it's important to teach our kids that when you talk to or play with someone, that person deserves your undivided attention. You husband probably does not realize that he is inadvertently teaching your son habits that could affect him in preschool (when he won't give teachers/friends his full attention) and beyond. Now that my son is five, I can truly see how much he models his behavior after us (regretting certain things, myself!).
K.

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R.V.

answers from San Francisco on

If you don't have a stance on this issue nows the time to get one. This was and still on occassion is a area of disagreemant for my husband and I. But he has let me lead on this in our home and now sees the benifit of careful thought as to what they watch. Do some research, there's lots of info out there on the negitive effects tv can have.The sooner you can both be on the same page the better. I have one rule of thumb and thats to err on the side of caution theres no harm done. So my kids might miss out on a good movie now and then, it always comes out on dvd. But the effects of programing and movies that are negitive can be long lasting. My kids do watch tv and video. Once they are aware of it as babies thats when we no longer watch anything that we wouldn't want them to see. Now that my youngest is almost 3 she watches dora and wonder pets and my big kids don't complain because they don't watch any of the junk thats promoted for older kids. Sponge BoB, Hannah Montana, no way! Tv is a non issue in our house because the kids have never been in charge so theres no whinning,complaining, fighting about what to watch. And now that they are older they have decerning taste on what is okay to watch and what is junk. So nows the time, decide firmly what viewing practices are going to be in your home. This is a very important issue in my opion. These early years will lay the foundation for the years ahead. It gets more diffucult as the kids get older. Best wishes

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C.A.

answers from San Francisco on

My husband is home with our daughter 2 days a week and have the same conversation about the TV. He likes to have the background noise, and I suspect let her play while he watches TV rather then interacting with her. I don't' like the TV on at all, I feel like this is a special time and he should soak it in and enjoy it before we find TV a necessity to get other things done around the house. Well, I kind of let it be and let him do what he wants to do. However, I just read an article about how having the TV on in the background, even educational TV, hinders toddlers development. When I'm home with her, it's not on until our daughter is in bed, I just don't ask what my husband does with the TV when I'm not home.
I hope this helps!

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A.L.

answers from San Francisco on

As another mom mentioned already, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends no tv for children until 2 years. Concerns about how it affects attention, language development, behavior, etc. So we try to keep the tv off whenever our 11 month old is around. I have become a little more lenient about it though. If for whatever reason the tv is on, I don't mind if she gets glimpses of it. Sometimes it can't be helped. We've been to restaurants where there's a tv. No matter how you turn her chair or what you put in front of her, she'll look at it at times. And I have to admit, I will put on something educational just so I can quickly trim her nails, but then the tv is off again. It's not easy being a stay at home parent - sometimes you just need that link to the outside world. Can your husband leave the tv off until your son is napping or asleep for the night?

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C.L.

answers from Fresno on

My daughter is 16 months and watches about 30 minutes a day (Veggie Tales or this one other cartoon she likes). We do have the TV on at other times, but she doesn't pay attention to it unless it is her show. I think the AAP says that kids under 2 shouldn't watch any TV at all, because it can hinder their verbal skills. Although my daughter does watch a little TV her verbal skills are great. She would rather play with her toys or read books anyway. I think it is O.K. for your husband to watch a little TV to maintain sanity being home all day. In a couple months your son will be a lot harder for you husband (energy wise).

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