Using a Wrist Strap Harness for My 6 Yr Old Who Runs off in Public

If he were developmentally delayed I would consider it. But, if its a case of ADHD OR ODD, then no. Absolutely not. I would give him somethingelse he can do: hop up and down, count how many jumping jacks you can do while we walk, but running away is not an option and as Rachel stated, consistent, unwavering consequences. "If you can not choose option a, b, or c then we'll have to go home." Discipline from you is learning self discpline. I don't think a harness will teach him anything accept that at six years old, he's the kid on a harness.

honestly, if he is 6 he could just take the strap off. He needs to be punished harshly when he runs off, grounding, removal of favorite toys, ect... until he learns to behave.

He's 6! My kids figured out a very early age how to get out of them all it is is Velcro. I suggestion discipline him when he does it. If you are at the zoo and he does it oh well trip is over back in t car to go home they learn pretty quick to stay with you as long as you do it consistently.

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Have you had your son tested for Autisim? It sounds like he has some learning disabilities.
I would try some diet modification. Take anything with monosodium glutamate (MSG) out of his diet. Also take out yorgurt. See if this helps his behavior. For some reason both substances make kids with autisim and ADD-ADHD act out and can become violent.

I would not try the wrist strap. I have seen toddlers get them off easily. If you can get a harnes for him do that or simply get a 5 ft dog leash and hook it to the belt loop of his pants. You will comments and looks of disapproval. If anyone says anything simply say 'my son is special needs and this is the only way I can keep him safe'.

Hey. . . do whatever it takes to keep him safe! I usually am very understanding when it comes to kids in public- b/c 90% of the things seen I have experienced myself- BUT when it comes to kids running across parking lots w/ mommies chasing after them- I just want to scream!! A 6yr old with a "leash" is better than a 6yr old on a missing person poster, or a 6yr old's obituary. I do agree with some others though-I would think a 6yr old will deff. be able to get out of it if he wants to, so then what?? I had one of these when my son was in the 2-3 range- (the little monkey one) but never really needed to use it. My kids know you DO NOT leave mom in public. Yep I'm a spanker (gasp!!) and I do public time outs! (another gasp!) haha- but they know what I expect and know the consequences. Your heart is in the right place,I didn't read your other posts, but from this one sounds like maybe you've got a strong willed little one. That's a good thing! Typically strong willed children will be leaders not followers! Best of luck~ God Bless

Unless you ziptie or handcuff him, he'll be out of that strap the moment you have your back turned. You'll have about half a second's worth of warning as you hear the velcro rip away.

Some ADHD impulse control tricks w/ running away.

1) Go to a safe place and do the "whistle game". This works best when they're still toddlers. It's essentially training your kids to come when you whistle. You say "Go!", and then when you whistle, they have to come back and "touch your leg" (like 'base') and wait until you say 'go'. Then they dash off and you whistle again. Do different distances. REALLY far away AND reeeeally close. What it does, after several hundred times over the course of a week or two) is train a part of their mind to HEAR you whistle for them no matter how hyperfocused they are. It yanks them momentarily out of the hyperfocus (with adhd-i kids, a soft bell is often used to aid in the transition... but those are sedentary activities). I use my fingers, my SIL uses a whistle she keeps on her bracelet.

As they get older and learn more self monitoring, you'll rarely need to use this (although at 9 I still whistle for my son once a week on average, but better than 3 times an hour!)

CHEER for them. Make it really fun, and a game, and give high fives each and every single time they come back. In a VERY short time, what becomes a game becomes habit/ just the normal state of being.

((ANYONE who objects to this doesn't have an ADHD-c or ADHD-h kid, who will literally run until their feet get bloody, and are often 10 feet away before the part of their mind that goes "I should ask" wakes up. They won't "get tired", or scared, or even realize they're on their own. ))

2) FUNNY WALKING! I used to use this in stores all the time. I'd have my son do teeny tiny steps on his toes, or march, or hop, or belly dance, or slow race, or itsy bitsy spider (fingers or FEET). Something that keeps him occupied and BY me.

3) Small muscle movements (they're as RELAXING as large muscle movements, and girls usually catch onto this faster than boys, but you can show him). Have him bat his eyelashes, wiggle his toes, flex his bum, run his tongue along his teeth, whatever. These are the things all of us all the time in order not to drive other people crazy while WE still need to be moving constantly.

4) LOTS of activity. We homeschool to support this (awayschool in our area is 8 hours long... talk about NIGHTMARE), but even in awayschool there are "work arounds" (like a 6mi walk before school). For my son, he needs at LEAST 4 hours of heavy hitting activity, and preferably 6-10. What I did while he was in preschool was to start of the day with a 6 mile "walk" (took us about an hour). I'd walk, he'd run. Now that he'd older, I walk, he rides razor, skateboard, bike, etc. Wear him out, feed him up. We also have a "sports" schedule that looks nuts. Swimming, Snowboarding, Basketball, Baseball, Aikido... the list goes on... AS WELL AS other physically active things like MUSIC (piano and singing), and drama.

HOW does #4 tie into stores? Well, when my son was still learning self control we would NOT go straight to anywhere I needed him to be calm. We'd go somewhere FIRST to get the vast majority of the wiggles out. You can't wear out ADHD-h kids, it's practically impossible, because they hyperfocus on physical activity. What you CAN do is take the 'edge' off, by running them ragged for 30-60 minutes ahead of time. My nephew (that I care for a few weeks to 3 months a year to give his parents a break) is ADHD-h. I can sometimes skate on my OWN son (adhd-c), but my nephew HAS to be "run" before we go somewhere quiet.

5) Meds or stimulants.

We used a large dog collar with a retracting lead on it today and a craft fair. The dog collar went around his waist by the way, not the neck.....lol.

We couldn't find the harness. Ours has sensory issues and is not always able to make good choices so the harness is for his safety.

Before you leave home, sit him down and explain your rules: He is suppose to stay beside you the entire time. Tell him after three corrections, or less if you want--depending on the destination, that he will either get a time out or you will leave immediately. When you are in the car, on your way, ask him what the rules are to ensure he knows it by heart. When you get there, explain again the rules and consequences. If he violates rules, follow through with consequences. No exceptions. He'll learn fast.

The wrist strap will work but what happens when you don't have it?

If he has a disability of some type, I get it but you still can't have a child running off. You still need to have consistent rules.

Wrist straps are probably not going to be effective with an older kid who is alot more unpredictible and stronger than a toddler. Depending on his size and where you are at in public, there is nothing wrong with still using a stroller, and putting them in the basket of a shopping cart to keep him "contained."

Since he is older, consider buying a Sit n' Stand stroller, he might be more open to using it. Or insist he ride the side of a shopping cart when in the parking lots or in crowded places where it is practical.

When crossing streets and parking lots, grip his wrist and hands in a vice hold such as is taught in self-defense classes when an assailant grabs your hands or wrist. (You hold the palm of his hand like you're going to shake it, but wrap your fingers tightly around either side of his wrist. Sounds awful, but you won't hurt him if you do it right. The hold you have will be gentle like holding hands the regular way, but if he struggles or pulls, he'll be very, very uncomfortable, and that means he will be less likely to want to break free because of the leverage you will have.

Incentives work fantastic too and will help them learn to curb themselves. Tell him if he can stay by his "wingman" he can have a small toy when you get back to the car. Keep a stash of cheap carnival toys in a baggie, match box cars, or whatever he likes, so he can get rewarded immediately upon return for good behavior. It's amazing how well they remember their safety rules when there is something good waiting for them.

Last, keep drilling safety rules over and over. Seems like they don't hear but they do. Some kids just have impulse control problems, and it takes a lot to get them to "get it." The hard part is trying not to have a heart attack yourself in the process of keeping them safe! I agree with the estute moms who suggested getting an evaluation for ADHD or a Spectrum disorder. These kids tend to have problems with impulse control for a very long time and you may want to take advantage of any advice an expert has to offer. Crowded places like stores, parks, and busy parking lots are very "stimulating" to kids with attention disorders...making a challenge for mom. Don't let anyone upset you by implying you aren't discipling your child properly. You just may have to take a different approach to reach him and his ability to understand and overcome any personal limits if that is what's going on here.

Based on all your other posts you really have your hands full!
If he behaves for everyone else, and behaves at school, then for some reason he doesn't see you as authority figure.
What is the consequence of him running away? If it happens again, stop whatever you are doing and GO HOME. I had to do that a few times with my own kids when they weren't behaving in public, I even left a full cart of groceries in the middle of the store one time, but they got the message. Certain behavior is not acceptable and shouldn't be tolerated, he needs to take you seriously.
Personally I would try not to take him anywhere, especially anywhere fun, until he has learned how to listen to you. Six years is old enough to know better, and like I said, if he behaves for everyone else, then he IS capable of showing restraint and making good choices.

instead of putting a wrist strap on him , put him in the buggy.
That way he's contained and you have your hands free. thats his punishment for running off , sitting in the buggy like a baby.

This is a product called: "Mommy I'm Here cl-103br Child Locator, Brown
by Mommy I'm Here"
Amazon has this.

But it is not a substitute, for your child.
But, you can then have a 'locator' device for your child, per being out in public and if he gets lost.
My daughter used this, when my Husband took her on a trip.
It works well.
It works from over 150 feet away from the child.

Per your other post about this problem, your son seems to lack Impulse-Control.
Have you spoken to the Pediatrician?

Talking to him about it and showing him safety videos, does NOT seem to help make him understand.....

You do whatever you need to do to keep them safe.
If I had to leash my kid at that age, I would. Mine always stayed right with me because the consequence for running off was right to bed with no supper and no TV for a week.
LBC

Be careful with the wrist strap - he might be able to get it off. I like the ones like a harness.

The one I used ha a harness that had very strong velcro and on the kid it velcroed in the back so my kid couldnt get out of it I loved it I left the harnes at a friends house by accident and ended up usin the strap and hookin it to a belt loop on the back of his pants either way it was a life saver. Sometimes no matter how hard you try you just have one of those kids that refuse to listen and have to do whats best for the kid no matter what others think.