hi there--
my daughter, who just turned 4, has seemed to be given up her nap. for 2+ years now, she has slept 8-8 and then from 2-3:30/4 in the afternoon. in the past month, she has gotten up earlier, around 7am, but continuing with the nap. but this past week, she has not fallen asleep at nap time. she is quiet for a bit and then plays quietly in her room. so that 's good. and we now put her to bed earlier so that she is asleep by 7pm. she goes to sleep right away, no problem. but the past two days, she has gotten up before 7 (this morning at 6:15). she has bags under her eyes, and she is much crankier and easier to get upset. i am concerned that she is not getting enough sleep. she has one of those clocks that changes color, and she knows her feet cannot touch the floor until 7 when the clock changes, but she is still talking loudly and playing (and waking me up by doing so).
my question: once your child dropped napping altogether, how did you make sure s/he was getting enough sleep? is there any way to get my daughter to stay quiet and wake up at 7 and not before? is "sleep begets sleep" no longer applicable at age 4? in other words, is a 7pm bedtime too early? too late? it just seems that losing the nap (1.5 hours) and waking up earlier (losing 45 minutes) add up to a lot of sleep loss, and it's taking its toll on her behavior and demeanor.
any thoughts would be greatly appreciated-- thanks!
ETA: she has gone through nap strikes before, and i have done many things to make sure she sleeps at naptime, which she had returned to. even been consulting a child psychologist for ways to ensure the nap continues (though she says that around this age, many, many kids drop the nap and the cranky behavior escalates). i feel like i have run out of tricks to ensure she naps (and she gets plenty of exercise and activity in the morning), and this time it just feels different to me. that said, i want to make sure she is getting enough sleep at night and is waking up at a reasonable hour. i think part of it is that we have had this routine for so long, so the changes are strange for all of us, and i am unsure of how to proceed. thanks again!
I don't remember my daughter ever in her life being asleep by 7:00 pm. Unless a child needs to be awake early in the morning, I would try a slightly later bedtime. And then adjust as necessary.
(I'm waking up earlier right now, because it's getting light earlier and earlier.)
As children get older their daily sleep requirments become less. Fourteen hours a day is a LOT for a four year old! At four years old she probably only needs ten hours a day, so if you want her to wake at 7:00am, then an 8:00pm or a 9:00pm bedtime is more realistic. Also, do a quiet time in the afternoon to replace nap time. For quiet time we usually did a movie, or let the kids look at books, but something quiet, sitting or laying down. Transitions are always a little tough on everyone, but the behaviour/demeanor problems should sort themselves out when the new routine is established.
My son napped through kindergarten and on weekends through first grade.
And after school throughout first grade he was one grumpy guy.
So he gave up naps when he was about 7 yrs old.
He grew very quickly starting at about 4 yrs.
When he was 4 and again at 6 he shot up 4 inches each year.
The growing pains were awful but he just needed all the sleep he could get.
Even now (he's 14 now), when he's having a growth spurt he'll sometimes get home from school and grab a 30 min nap.
If her behavior is suffering that badly, then she still needs the naps.
Wow! Just be happy that it lasted as long as it did. That's a lot of sleep! She just plain probably doesn't need as much now. Last time DD slept that much was when she was a baby. Everyone said that when she dropped her one nap she would make up for it at night and she never did. She now sleeps between 10-11 hours a night and it's been that way since she dropped the nap and it hasn't affected her.
I personally think that the 7pm bedtime is too early, which is why she's getting up so early. Play with it and see happens. You can't really force them to sleep. She will eventually adjust.
The earlier you put them to bed the earlier they will get up. They only sleep so many hours. She slept almost 12 hours, that's more than enough sleep for a 4 year old.
You need to keep her up in the evening. In a few weeks it won't even be dark at 7pm. At 4 she could even be doing a 9pm bedtime and still be getting enough.
Perhaps putting her to bed later and getting her up each morning on time will encourage her to take that afternoon nap for a while longer.
I think she is getting way to much sleep early. I'd have her bed time around 8p. If you want her to settle a bit earlier put a quiet kid movie on that could lul her as part of her bed time or Mommy me time by reading a book. I think she will sleep better with the later time.
this is a rough transition.. just because they drop the 1.5 hour nap.. does nto mean they dont need the same amounth of sleep.
when my kids seem to be not sleeping enough.. I do a sleep journal for a week or so.. write down the times they go to sleep and wake up.. (not the time that yu put them in bed and they lay there)also.. take a few notes about her mood --does seh seem tiered or rested?
you should see a pattern after a few days.. then you can adjust the bedtime to help her get enough sleep. maybe bring back the nap every other day.. or something?? find the way to have her get sleep..
My kids are 5 and 7 .. they sleep 11 hours almost every night.. and once or twice a week.. they sleep 12 hours.. so I dont think she is sleeping too much..
My son started to transition away from his nap around age when he started preschool. And he would only nap in the afternoons on the 2 days he went after he got home, not at school....one time he was there an afternoon, instead of the morning, and he wouldn't nap there. By 4, I think he was going to bed around more like between 730 and 8 pm...with a random nap -- usually in the car. Give her a few days and keep an eye on her and you'll figure out what new new "patterns" are...
I just want to chime in that daylight savings is just around the corner. I find my son wakes up earlier this time of year, I think it is due to it being lighter earlier.
Also, if you would like to preserve your existing routine, why not shorten her nap? It will probably help when she goes to school anyway. (as will an earlier wake up time) I know you mention that she is getting a shorter nap right now, but she is bound to get so tired that she will occasionally try for a longer nap in the next few days.
Have you checked to see if her 5 year molars are coming in? That might explain why she needs sleep but isn't getting it.
Adjustment periods are tough, but once you figure out how much her new total sleep amount is (for the day), you can adjust her bedtime so that her wake up time is when you hope for it to be.
I am suprised that your daughter was still napping considering she got 12 hours at night... most 4 year olds average 11-12 hours a day (in 24 hrs) total. You should be happy you got naps and a 12 hour night for as long as you did. She just doesn't need that much sleep any more. It will be a rough stretch until she ajusts to a new schedule but I would say if she gets close to 12 hours per night with no nap, she is doing just fine. My kids stopped napping consistantly by age 3 and would sleep about 7:30 pm to 7:00 am. I still encouraged rest time or would do car naps (the only way to get them to sleep in the afternoon past age 3) if we were going somewhere that evening and they would need to be up later. At age 4 she just doesn't need naps anymore. Good luck with the transition!
