Toddlers Sharing a Bedroom? How to Transition?

Updated on November 30, 2006
M. asks from Birmingham, AL
5 answers

My sister is moving in with my children and me for the next few months so I'm trying to get my kids used to the idea of sharing a room for now. I have a 3 yr old son and a 17 month old daughter who have become accustomed to having their own personal spaces for sleep. I am also trying to transition my daughter from her normal pack-n-play bed to a toddler bed. I have a few concerns. One is that my 3 yr old refuses to go to sleep without one of his videos on and my daughter won't go to sleep unless the room is dark and quiet so I'm not sure how they are going to fall asleep in the same room (they're definitely going to be a distraction to one another). My second concern is that my son wakes up screaming in the middle of the night every night and winds up opening the child safety gate to get to my bedroom and climbs into bed with me------since our bedrooms are upstairs I'm afraid he's going to leave the gate open leaving the possibility open for my little girl to fall down the stairs if she gets out of bed. I'm also afraid that his screaming in the middle of the night is going to make it impossible for his sister to remain asleep for the duration of the night. Last night was the 2nd night they've shared a room and luckily I woke up when he crawled into bed with me and I closed the gate---when I woke up to get ready this morning my daughter was asleep with her blanket in the hallway in front of the closed gate, so I know it's going to be a problem. If anyone has any advice it would be greatly appreciated.

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So What Happened?

I really appreciate the advice. (Thanks Lori for the reassurance). Just for the record, I do NOT bring people home with me----and CERTAINLY would never do so when my children were at home. And the television in my son's room is definitely not used to allow him to zone out in front of the tv. I don't want to allow the kids, especially in this difficult period of adjusting to the divorce, to become accustomed to sleeping in my room. I had my ex come by and tighten the safety gate so that my son can no longer open it by himself. That seems to be working ok for now. Every single night so far, my daughter will wake up and drag her blanket to the gate and fall asleep in the hallway. We'll see how that works out.

More Answers

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B.K.

answers from Knoxville on

I know this isn't going to be much help for a single mom who dates much or brings men home, but since I am assuming you don't (hoping you don't ... no offense), I will give this suggestion.

If your son is in a toddler bed, or otherwise small bed that might fit in your room, why not move him in with you, and then your daughter won't have to move. This seems to me to be the easiest suggestion, since your son comes to bed with you in the night anyway. Why not just put him in there? Then he won't be roaming the house to come to you, and your daughter won't be woken up by him. Best of all, you won't have so much change to contend with, and you won't have so much worry keeping you up. Since your sister is only going to live there for a while, you can just work on transitioning your son back to his own room, instead of getting them used to sharing and then having to change everything again. I hope I helped ...

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E.I.

answers from Dothan on

M.,

I concur with the earlier statement. Television in the bedroom is not a good idea. And studies are showing children who fall asleep with tv at night could lead to attention span problems later in life. I would take out the tv ASAP! Try some classical music at night if he needs something to go to sleep to! : )

Secondly, I know you need your sister to help you, but would it be possible for you and her to sleep in the same room? Your children should have their space, especially if they have recently undergone some changes in their living arrangement with the divorce. And although I support putting children in the same room, however, their ages should probably be a little more closer together than that, or they should be older. (Your 17 month old is still little.) And if your older child could potentially put your younger child in danger with leaving the gate open at night, then I would definitely think about putting your sister in your room and maybe yourself with the younger child or possibly on a pull-out couch?

I know these are the answers you are probably not what you are looking for, it isn't easy in your type situation, where space is limited! I always running out of space every time we move! (We are a military family.) I hope I have helped you somehow! : )

Take care,
Lee

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A.C.

answers from Greensboro on

Do NOT let him have a TV in his room. he needs interaction with people. Not to be zoned out in front of the TV.

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L.O.

answers from Nashville on

M.
I have a 6yr old and a11month old I want them to share a room but she still wakes up screaming too. Ive decided to put baby in own room to get use to going back to sleep on her own and moving 6 yr old in my room with toddler bed for awhile. Maybe you could put son in with you for a while. I dont think I read in your question that you let your child zone out in front of TV Im sure its the light that helps them not the TV so I wouldnt worry about the one comment that was more of an attack than advice. Well any way Im sure you will figure out a great solution Good Luck

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J.N.

answers from Clarksville on

I have two boys that have shared a room all along and now can't get them to sleep in seprate rooms. LOL I would say that it is going to take some getting use to, but they will adapt to eachother. You might not get much sleep due to the saftey issues.

Is there some place else you can place the gate to where the stairs are blocked and he does not have to open it to get to you? Or maybe put another gate up at the stairs maybe.

Well I hope I helped a little, sorry it couldn't be anymore.

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