Toddler Acting Different Late in My Pregnancy

My daughter is 21 mos. old and I am due the beginning of April. for the past few weeks, she has become increasingly clingy and whiny, challenging my every command or request and throwing tantrums any time something doesn't go her way. She doesn't do this for her baby-sitter, or much for daddy, just for me. I do think that she can tell she is about be displaced in a way. I think about how often I hold her and how she is free to climb into my arms any time that I am sitting and not using them, lol. When her baby brother is here, that will most likely be his place, and I am sure that there will be meltdowns then as well.

I have also been told the that 'terrible twos' can arrive early and that is where her tantrums and power-struggles are coming from. I don't know, but I do sometimes hope that it is the terrible twos and that she will have passed this stage by the time the new baby arrives. She is very advanced verbally, and can have a great conversation with me. I think that as she realizes more that she can communicate her thoughts and wishes to me, the more frustrated she becomes when she can't make me understand, or thinks that I don't understand.

I'm sure this doesn't help much, but just to let you know, you aren't the only one going through it.

Hi! As a mother of 4 boys, I can't offer any girl specific advice, but since there's no more than 22 months between any of my kids, I can give some general info. It could be the new baby, but in my experiences it seemed the kids could have cared less that the baby was coming "soon": they didn't want to hear about it until the baby was actually here. Could it be that because the baby is due in three weeks and you're still working and preparing for her arrival that your daughter feels left out? Maybe if you give her a special job to do each day to help her new sister when she comes, she would feel like she was having a bigger part in the whole experience. Also, it could just be that the "terrible two's" have begun. It can be hard to deal with that and a new baby, but if you have something special that's just for her that she can do while you're feeding or otherwise taking care of the baby you can get through it!

My oldest began acting out the night before our daughter was born. He was awake until midnight and had never done that before. She may be sensing that big changes are coming in her young life, but at the same time she's almost 2. The terrible two's are here. She's basically in the stage now where she will be testing her boundaries, but at a tiring and difficult time for you. My advice, when you feel yourself losing it, walk away from your daughter and take a few breaths to calm down. I know how difficult it is, having been through this situation...4 kids, 3 of which went through the 'terrible two's' while having a newborn.

As the saying goes 'This too shall pass.'

Good luck with your growing family,
B.

It seem's that around 2 years old, little ones become fearful of things they don't understand (water going down the drain, loud noises, etc) I had three girls all within 3 1/2 yrs so I know how you are feeling! Take time with your little girl even when you are stressed or rushed with all you have to do in a day! This may only be a phase that she is going through so just try to be patient! All children are different so trust in your instincts as a mother and take the time to understand that she is only little and probably feels the anxiety that you might be feeling with the birth of the new baby being just around the corner! Good luck and enjoy!

Hello J. S,
My daughter is going to be 3 in May and she has been acting the same. We have never had a problem with her untill about 3 months ago. I think it is just something to do with them being 2. Good Luck with the new baby and hope things get better. N. W

I would have to agree with the person who said your daughter senses that her sister is coming soon. My girls are 2 years apart and my oldest was so moody, weeks before her sister came. She was quite and sat on the couch not doing or saying much (she is a very active child). It was if she was depressed. I firmly believe she knew that her sister would arrive soon. It's weird, but I think she felt left out some how and scared. I know that being 9 months pregnant you don't want to deal with a moody toddler, but remember that this is a big change for her and she needs reasured that mommy and daddy will still be there for her.