Tips for a New Stay at Home Mom?

I homeschool, so now there's a certain amount of structure (at least up until lunch) but before we began, we really didn't "plan" anything. Of course, you will have appointment, etc...

...but otherwise, we just took each day as it comes (and still do, outside of school.) If we need to go to the store, we go. I do big shopping once a month at Target, and at the grocery stores...and we walk to our local store almost every other day to pick up something.

If it's nice, we go to the park or nature center, or just for a walk. If it's icky, we stay in. We pretty much do what she wants, outside of what needs to be done...play with toys, read books, play games, etc.

Breakfast, lunch, and dinner are at approximately the same time every day, and so is bedtime, bath, etc.

I definitely don't schedule "play" time versus other time...I would just let things take their natural course, and modify as needed! :)

Congratulations, by the way! It's a wonderful life!

I'm half and half. When my oldest (she'll be 5 in Aug) was 1.5 yo, we joined a Mommy group through meetup.com. We found a great group of people that are SAHM or WAHM. Always something new to do and things to explore. And definitely things I haven't done before. So, we 'kind of' adhered to a schedule (but mostly for meals). Breakfast after wakeup, meetup/playtime outside of house (9ish-12ish), lunch, naptime/quiet time at home, snack and playtime at home, dinner and then family time. Things are always changing as the kids get older - I have 4 yo and 2 yo. But if we get out during the morning 3 days a week, I'm happy.

I don't quite have a scheduled time to do everything but some days I'll say is a clean/organize day and the kids will play at home or do some errands during the day but not all. If at all else fails, I'll leave errands for night time or weekends when the hubby is home.

Just take it a day at a time. Make a schedule but no biggie if it doesn't get done. And most of all, have fun!

I was a SAHM for the first 6-9 months after my sons were born and, since I'm a teacher, I have summers home with them. Here's what I learned, for what it's worth...

Yahoo has a great calendar function to replace Outlook if you don't have that at home. Does your cell phone have a calendar app? Now would be a great time to find out. But, overall, my family uses a paper/pencil weekly calendar that lives on our island. House rule: if it's not on the calendar, the family is not committed to the event.

When my sons were babies, I had a very tight schedule and it worked very well. Now that they're older (13 and 17), we still have a schedule, although it's more flexible. I would encourage you to check out www.flylady.net. This might be a great start for you to keep some sanity and order to your life. (I do this during summer when I'm off school.)

Since I live in rural Nevada, and gas is increasingly expensive, errands are one day a week. My boys and I usually make a day of it (we call it "going to town"), complete with lunch out, household errands and, if they've been good, a "fun" stop, usually Borders or Wal Mart. We also usually do one "field trip" day a week. This could be going to a museum, the beach, a baseball game, something out of the ordinary. This gets us out of the house two days a week and we all work hard at spacing them out so we don't get sick of each other.

I guess the biggest thing I've learned about my time at home is that it requires far more discipline to stay organized and on top of things at home than it ever does at school. My hats are off to full-time SAH mamas! The second biggest thing I learned is how valuable outside play time is to wearing my kids out so they sleep well at night. It doesn't have to be structured; simple "go outside and play" works well. The third biggest thing I learned during my time at home is not to be afraid of boredom (for the kids). My kids know that if they say, "Mom, I'm bored," I'll find them chores to do. Over the years, my sons have discovered all sorts of cool activities on their own with this philosophy. At 4, your daughters might be young for chores, but I never backed down from saying "find something in your toy box to play with." They have to learn to entertain themselves.

I hope this helps. Good luck to you!

I am a part of MOMS Club and I highly recommend it. There are weekly activities for the kids in addition to playgroups and monthly Mom's Night Out. You can attend as much or little as you're interested in. I know SO much more about fun things to do with kids in our area than I even had any idea existed before. And it's just nice to have a social outlet for both me and the kids and a support network. They brought me meals for 2 weeks when I had my daughter. It's very regional, so everyone in my chapter lives very near to me, which is convenient. To find a chapter near you go to www.momsclub.org My chapter only costs $23/year

Also, look at the website www.flylady.net for organizing and routine ideas. The website and program can be overwhelming (caring for children and a home are overwhelming after all), but I have implemented a lot of good from flylady, namely getting dressed every morning. I'm naturally organized, but I didn't have routines, and those really help. I have a morning and evening routine, but I still struggle on the cleaning routines. Things don't always go smoothly and according to routine or plan with a little one. But a little structure is better than none in my experience. I try to start dinner around 3:30 or 4 to get it done and cleaned up after so that when my husband comes home it's dinner and family time (this ideal and not always reality) so we can go on a walk together and enjoy each other once he's home. I am very efficient in my meal planning. Lunch is always leftovers from dinner the night before, and I often make a lot of something and freeze it (like beans). If we have extra meat after having it for leftover for lunch, I chop and freeze it to throw in soups or on salad for easy meals later. I use my computer calendar (iCal) religiously. I have a tendency to fill our days with too much fun stuff out and about, which just ends up being stressful. I'm an on-the-go mom, but some of our best days are when we sit at home and spend the afternoon reading library books, crafts, playing games, or just talking.

I go to the gym regularly for my "me" time. To answer your questions: We do fun things (library story time, go to a park, invite friends over for lunch, activity with MOMS Club) at least 3 days a week. I do not have structure for running errands. Every week is different. I look at my calendar every evening and every morning and look ahead as well to see when I fit in going to the grocery store, etc. I do not combine my errands in one day and I wouldn't recommend that unless you do it without kids, like get a sitter. Otherwise you'll all be very frustrated and frazzled. The kids cannot handle that much running around to boring stores all at once. I try to accomplish stuff on the one day a week my kids are gone at school at the same time. I get 3 hours a week to myself during that time and I try to do something productive. If I had more time I would also try to work on a hobby or read during that time, but 3 hours just isn't enough for all of that. I try to put my kids to bed around the same time every night, within a half hour of 8:30, but I don't wake them up. I think their bodies know when they've gotten enough rest. I wake up a little before the kids and quickly throw my workout clothes and shoes on and brush my teeth, or shower and get ready if I'm not exercising that day. Many days I don't get my hair done and makeup on before the kids wake up, and once they wake up my time for getting myself ready is pretty much over. That's what cute hats and ponytails with cute hairclips are for.

Final words: I like to be productive and get things done and many things are important to me, but we can't have it all every day so we have to simplify. I make choices every day and I use this as my guide: What use of my time is going to have the greatest long-term effect on our happiness and well-being? For instance, I'll usually play with the kids over having a spotless house and I've learned to let go (kind of). Good luck finding your own personal balance as a SAHM! I'm happy for you and your kids you get to have this experience. Don't beat yourself up if full-time parenting takes up way more energy and time than you had imagined and things don't always go according to plan.

I've got a list of things I try to get done each day: laundry, chores, appts, etc...but if something doesn't get done one day, there's always tomorrow!

We only have a schedule as far as meals go, and the rest of the day gets planned around them:

wake up is usually sometime between 6-7am, then breakfast at 8am (after mama gets her coffee! lol), then we get dressed and wash up for the day, 3 days a week my oldest goes to preschool from 9-11:30 so me and the younger ones will either come home and play or get some errands done then (MUCH easier with just 2!); the days she's home we usually do crafts. Lunch is around 12:30, followed by some outside time or the girls play while I do some chores. Snack around 3pm, then outside till daddy gets home.

I'm actually looking forward to summer (no preschool!) so that we can have a little more consistancy; then my oldest goes to kindergarten this fall, so the routine will change again.

This is a new change for you and your girls, so take it slow. You're all going to need some adjustment time to get used to being around each other ALL day ;o) I'd start the routine with meals and see what works for you and your girls from there. As for the over-scheduling, my girls are 3 and 4.5 (and 5 months) and never do more than 2 activities at once: dance, swimming, soccer. It keeps us busy but not TOO busy.

I have a large calendar, the 8 1/2 x 11 size and each day there is something on it so I don't forget! :o) We usually plan nothing on Mondays unless it is something special. I like to stay at home after the weekend so I use that day to clean the house and just hang out at home. The kids play either indoors or outdoors. I run errands usually all in one day. I keep a list of what I need to do and go do it all in one day if possible. I plan a day with their friends at the park, or a playdate somewhere. On one day I plan a lunch with a friend of mine that also has children so I get time with my friends and they play with their kids. then maybe another day at home, maybe a day at the pool, maybe I have a doc or hair appt, whatever the schedule dictates, which is does dictate for you.....
I always give them at least a day at home and then on errand days they usually get 1/2 day at home. I do not believe in overscheduling. I like them to enjoy their toys and downtime. If you can pick something to accomplish each day, more power to you. If you start right away keeping yourself disciplined you will do well. I, on the other hand, have willy nilly days, some days I get nothing done and some days i get a lot done. You do get lazy so try to keep yourself organized and work on projects that you have wanted to do. Make your lists now that you want to get done. congrats to you, it is so special having that opportunity!

I have been a SAHM for 5 years and love it! So glad that you will get to spend some precious time with your girls.

Since your girls are the same age you will be able to do a lot of stuff and not have to worry about appealing to different age kids. Our kids are 3 years apart so it has always been interesting doing things, like the library for instance.....our 2 year old just wants to run around the library and our 5 and 8 year old want to find a good book and sit and read for awhile.

As far as a schedule, I've always made a point to shower every morning, all of us need to eat breakfast and be dressed by 9am, and there has to be dedicated play time (no cleaning or other distractions, just play and interact with the kids). I grocery shop when needed, usually once a week. We go to the YMCA (for me to workout) every other day. We spend a lot of time outside and just go with the flow. Let your kids experience life! That might mean stopping at a park just because they want to or parking at a spot close to the airport to watch the planes take off and guess where it is going. Some of my best memories with my kids so far have been those random moments of experiencing something together.

One thing that I have been doing is some journaling a few times a week. I write about what we have done that day or what we struggled with that day. It is so fun to read it years later.

Enjoy your kids and just let them be kids....have fun!