The Words My Step Daughter Spoke About Her Newborn Son.

Although it sounds like she has other issues it also sounds like she may be suffering from ppd I think women with other psychological problems are at increased risk. She may not be being lazy but not doing anything because she is depressed. If she is on welfare she should be on Medicaid and they will cover mental health. If she is a threat to herself or others I believe she can be held at the hospital psych wing for a 24 hr watch. I think dads best bet is next time she hits him to call the police and let them handle her because if she changes her mind and wants baby at least her violence will be on police record.

The baby's father needs to file for custody ASAP. Yes Child Services may need to be involved. The living situation that you are describing, not just the fighting is NOT good for the baby. You need to step up and help the Dad help his son. Wether that is a roof over their heads, calling Child Services, or paying for a sitter and a maid. The welfare of your grandchild is at stake.

M.

Unfortunately you probably cant do any thing with her except try to talk her into seeing a doctor for her mental issues (psych). As far as the living conditions for your step grandchild, I do believe you should feel pretty responsible there and either talk to the dad and tell him to take that baby somewhere safe and clean or you are going to have to intervene with the authorities.
Sad. I feel for ya.. It's hard to be pretty much helpless and watch these things happen.

Not all women are maternal. If she really doesn't want to be a mom, then the best thing for everyone is for her to leave and give full custody of the baby to the dad.

I don't know if you can really "do" anything. She sounds incredibly immature and it seems her new "toy" is not as magical as she hoped it would be.
I think it probably would be best if she does move out and leave the baby. Support the father all that you can. Hopefully, he can file for full custody and she will agree to terminate her parental rights completely. That's probably the best outcome overall for this situation.

GET THAT CHILD AWAY FROM HER!!! If you need to take temporary custody, do it. That little boy will not live if she is taking care of him. If he does live, we will grow up just like her. The world DOES NOT need another person like her!
Help that dad out by finding ways to get full custody of the baby. Please someone get that baby away from her.

Sounds like the baby's dad needs to file for custody and say good ridance.

As for help for your SD, check with some state agencies and see what might be able to be done to help her.

Honestly, you need to contact Child Protective Services and report the situation. You cannot, in good conscience, have a child living in a filthy and explosive environment. The call is anonymous and the person who interviews you will ask you plenty of questions and will do an immediate visit to the home to inspect (unannounced).

If she is unstable, she will be forced to get help. The most difficult part is that the baby may be removed from the household if she does not elect to leave herself. The father can retain custody if he demonstrates the ability to care for the child and the home- most states will subsidize daycare in these situations.

To me, it sounds like your stepdaughter needs help- you can't do that for her, but you can make sure that your grandchild is safe. Right now, he simply isn't.

From what you describe she is an unfit mother. At this point I'd be more concerned about the baby than your stepdaughter. A baby needs and deserves someone to provide love and proper care. If she wants to leave the baby with the father, then I would not discourage her from doing so. From what you've described he is a caring father who is trying to do what is best for his child. If she does leave the baby with him and move out, I suggest you tell him to immediately go to the child support office and file paperwork. It is not so much about getting money from her, but will establish him as the father and as the parent with physical custody. If he can afford a private attorney, I'd suggest he get one and sue for sole custody with supervised visitations for your stepdaughter until she has her act together.

As for your stepdaughter, she may need professional help, but she could just be a selfish, uncaring person. From the information you gave I think she's just selfish and uncaring, but since you have more knowledge and a long history with her you'd be in a better position to know if she needs professional help or not. But either way, I'd be more concerned about doing what is best for the baby.

I would also agree with Megan C. and have the baby's father file for custody. She is 21 and obviously not mature enough to know how great it is to be a parent and what a blessing a child is, sometimes 21 is just too young! If the dad seems to have his head on straight and wants custody then he should file for it. Before even considering getting your stepdaughter some help, someone needs to get that baby away from her.

Try to talk to the daddy if he isn't fit as a parent, get full custody of this precious baby! He shouldn't have to go through this turmoil and drama----she needs help and you don't want it to turn into those news stories about a mother hurting/killing her child. I know that sounds extreme, but its entirely possible with someone who is irrational and doesn't want to be a parent. She sounds resentful of her baby--thats not a good position to be in. I would do all I could to step in and get the baby if the dad won't step up and get custody. Good luck to you and yours.

M

Talk to your grandson's father. Take him out to dinner and have a heart to heart with him. Let him know you're there to help with whatever is best for your grandson. Tell him you want to spend time with your grandson no matter what. Encourage to file for custody and testify for him during mediation if needs be.
Your stepdaughter is an adult, she makes her own decisions and must be responsible for them. That baby needs an advocate. He is relying upon his family to do what's best for him. Step up and get involved, for his sake.

Child Protective services need to be called. Hopefully, the father can gain custoday, but even a foster family would be better than that woman. Discuss it in advance with the father, see what his wishes are and how you can support him, but either way, protect that poor baby by at least making a phone call.

Call the police and child protective services quickly, before that baby dies. PLease!