Sudden Behavior Change in 3 Year Old

This is pretty normal at this age, especially for little girls. They start developing more independence and discover they can have an opinion about things that affect them. Little girls (I think) become more opinionated and whiny. Unless you feel there is a valid reason for her change in behavior, I wouldn't give in to her new demands. Try to play a game on the way to daycare, let her take a favorite stuffed animal, tell her you'll take her to the ice cream store when you pick her up, or to a park, etc.

I think it is a stage. I remember times when my daughter would do this, then it would go away. I don't think daycare 2x /week and a couple of Y classes means she is "overbooked". This amount of activity seems reasonable, as long as she is getting some free time and time to play with you during the week, also. I would just be encouraging and upbeat and give this some time. Some times they do this just to see how much "power" they have in their lives at different stages.

Maybe she just feels stressed with too much time away from home. It sounds like she's "overbooked". If she's doing so much at 3, what will her life be like when she's10? Soccer, dance class, gymnastics, cheerleading, karate, you get the idea. I would back off on the outside activities for awhile. All she really needs at this age is the security of a stable home, some interaction with other kids to help develop social skills (daycare is great for that), and Mommy and Daddy time. I think you are too eager to have her have all these outside interests when she's trying to tell you that she's just not ready. Stay home, make cookies, read books, plant flowers, whatever. She can't verbalize what she needs from you, but she's plainly telling you that she's not happy. Good luck.

My thought was the same as Nancy's – could your child simply need more down time, hanging around with mom and dad, playing, resting, exploring the back yard, following her own whims? Three-year-olds need free play, imaginative play, make-believe play, and more play. It's their primary job.

It is possible all the activity is overwhelming her. I know when I try to take on too much, eventually all I want to do is stay home and hide under the blankets. Perhaps you could drop one activity and see how she adjusts?

Maybe dropping the Y classes will get he back to enjoying pre-school. I would give it a try (and remember she will need some adjustment time, too).

Good Luck,
S.

As a mom and teacher my heart goes out to you. I think you just need to keep trying to figure out what has changed to cause her to change. Children are so hard to figure out sometimes. They are also very literal. Maybe she took something someone said or something that happened once and is very upset about it. Has anything changed at home? It could be possible that she is just going through a phase and will outgrow it. Maybe another child picked on her once but, hasn't done it again since the teachers have been paying closer attention. Maybe she is missing her mommy time more than before, now that there are more activities for her? I don't really have a good answer for you but, wanted to try to help since there aren't any other answers yet. Just keep trying and I will keep you guys in my prayers. I hope you find out soon and get your happy little girl back very soon! Hang in there!

I noticed that my daughter can become very stressed during her swimming lessons. She also is very tired and irritable afterwards from exerting herself. Maybe it is the swimming lessons for your little one too?

Sounds like your 3 year old is overwhelmed by having the 2 Y classes. Some children can handle it and other's can't. I would cut back and just have 1 class for right now and try again at a later age. We tend to push our children and not listen to their needs and how much pressure they can handle. I am in the miniority when I say that kids just need to be kids, play outside, with their toys and have time with mom/dad etc. Yes outside activities are great, but don't push your child too fast or they will burn out before you know it and won't want to participate in anything as they get older. We think our kids have to have a ton of outside activities but they don't. Take a clue from your child, she isn't ready for 2 classes.

Do you stay with her during the swimming lessons? If it started with that then that is probably the source of the problem. It could be as simple as to much for a young child and as complicated as a fear of the pool and made to go in or it being to cold. It could be someone else getting into trouble a lot makes her worry she will be yelled at too and make it unpleasant. If you want to keep her in swimming lessons, please be there for them so you can see how she reacts. Is she scared or offish with the instructor? Does she fight going into the water? Ask her if she wants to wait to take swimming lessons for a year or so.

My 3 yo is going through the exact same thing- all of a sudden in the last week, he doesn't want to go to preschool (that he normally loves), says no one plays with him (which I know is not true), etc. It's usually some different excuse every time. I told him that he has to go anyway, and after a little fit, he is completely fine and happy again. When I pick him up in the afternoons, he is happy and says he had a good day. I honestly think it's a stage he is going through. Above all ,he had rather stay at home in the mornings and I think this is just his way of trying to get his way. I think that giving in to him just teaches him that he can manipulate to get what he wants, so we stick to the status quo.
Anyway, I hope it helps to know you aren't the only one. :)

Cutting back on her Y activities may be a good place to start. Even though she may like the activities, she may not be able to connect that she is overwhelmed and just wants down-time. Preschoolers don't benefit from having more than an hour or so of scheduled structured extracurricular activities a week. If her resistance continues, stay and observe unnoticed if possible for anything that might make her uncomfortable.

It also could be a confidence thing. Since my 4 y/o daughter was moved up to "Level 2" in her swimming class, where she actually has to do strokes on her own, she is resistant and whiny before going because its a lot more work and she probably isn't confident that she is doing it right. She is usually happy when she gets out of the water at her accomplishments, but needs encouragement every week. Either way, I think having her pick which activity she want to do and cutting back on her schedule may help.