Stay at Home Moms Whose Kids Are in School

After I was laid off I could not find much motivation either - so, I invited people over to the house often so things HAD to be done around the house! Hope that helps - being laid off is emotionally sucky and it can easily effect everything.

One of the busiest people I knew who used to deligate out a lot of work, said, "if you want something done, give the task to a busy person."

Sad but true. Busy people simply function on a different gear.

Mine are preschoolers, but with our last two moves before kids, I lolly gagged about finding a job and took some time off. Its amazing how little you get done when you are not pressed for time. And I also thought I'd keep an immaculate house but it was messier than ever! Recently I just made myself a schedule that is flexible enough to suit my personality, but structured enough to kick my hap hazard butt in gear. I recently did this because i got rid of my cleaning service and needed a way to maintain my house without help. Just for an example, I run the dishwasher after dinner even if its not totally full and empty it every morning. I find that I don't pile up dishes through out the day or run into the monumental task of dealing with emptying the dishwasher and cleaning up dinner mess. I used flylady to inspire me. I made a list of tasks that need to be done daily, weekly, bi -months and once monthly and put them into a calendar that I follow on a 28 day cycle regardless of the month.
Making certain days of the week for certain chores is a really good way to keep form letting things pile up on you as well as mentally preparing you for your day without having to put a lot of though into it. This is not exhaustive but this is how i organize it roughly:
Monday: sheets and towels (change out and launder), upstairs dust and vac.
Tue: exercise (I have an appointment time of 8:30 even though I just do a DVD at home), flex day for chores not on my regular list or get out of the house day.
Wed: Kitchen details like cook top and microwave, meal planning day, and start the clothes laundry.
Thur: exercise, groc shopping, vac and dust downstairs, clothes laundry.
Friday: bathrooms

This has really helped me. And should I ever be a SAHM with kids in school, I will still try to keep a schedule and reserve certain task for certain days so it becomes ingrained and I am without excuse.

I too find it really hard to get house chores done and only deadlines and lists make me do it. But also, I have some freelance work that I do at home, so that helps.

Since you were recently laid off, you are used to having a work schedule, so have a home schedule to replace it. Figure out what you want to do each week, break that into what you want to do each day, and schedule it. Be sure to include things that enrich your life, not just household chores. If you have friends who are SAHMs with school-age kids, be sure to get together with them during the day and NOT talk about the kids only -- it will help you feel connected.

Volunteering at school is a great thing to do and will make you feel plugged into the school; you will have a much better knowledge of what really goes on, what teachers have this or that reputation, what your kids do all day, where the school really shines or really lacks, etc. If your kids' classroom teachers do not need your help, ask the school librarian if he or she would like you to come help out there a few times a month, or see if the front office needs regular help to take things like copying off their hands.

If you continue to stay home and don't get another job, consider volunteering in the community, too. Or become a Girl or Boy Scout leader or co-leader -- that takes up planning time! OK, got to go.... I am procrastinating on a work deadline and then have to go volunteer at the school library today!

Neither of my kids are in school yet, but my plan is to make the schedule according to the kids' school and extracurricular activities, volunteer, and get the house in shape....but in addition to that, I go to school part time (a couple nights a week and on the computer) and will continue that. Once my eldest is in school, I'll bump up my work load at school. By the time my youngest is in school, I'll be nearly finished with school and will go full time to get it done. Then I'll search for a job that I can work while the kids are in school. In the meantime though, my job is home management (not just keeping the house clean and the food cooked but the finances, the yard, any projects we have, etc to keep everything running smoothly). That involves a schedule: a morning and an evening routine, a basic daily routine, a weekly schedule where I do different things on different days, so that I can do a little everyday and get it all done every week, including all the extracurricular, fun, volunteer, etc opportunities.
Good luck finding your stride.

I always thought if I was home all day my house would be spotless. Not so. I was laid off too and found that when I was working full-time I had an excuse why the house wasn't clean. Being home all day means you're constantly looking at what could be done. It is hard to get motivated. I do basic cleaning every day.

I have found that our weekends are available for family fun because I can do the shopping, laundry, etc. during the week. That's a big plus. To keep myself occupied during the day, I volunteer at the school and another organization, I plan menus and shopping lists, catch up on reading, make appointments, do shopping, run errands for my mom, etc. I'm still working on fitting in more exercise. Don't beat yourself up over having a schedule. Take a while to adjust to not working, then tackle what you can. You don't have to do everything in one day. Some days I'm not motivated to do anything and I've decided that's OK. Even mommy needs a break!

I get up in the morning see my husband off to work and then my children get up for school. I throw on temporary step outside clothes. They get themselves breakfast, I get my youngest ready and then it's off to wait for the school buses.

Once they're off I start on simple chores and before 1 make sure I get a shower. I typically spend time planning dinner as well as making some sort of special treat a few days a week. I have to work out my own schedule of doc appointments and such as well at least twice a week. I get major cleaning done when it's needed which is honestly only once a week. I cannot lie I spend a lot time focusing on doing research regarding further treatments for myself and my son. I work out on days I can handle it.

I find motivation by knowing that I am lucky to be able to have a husband that is able to provide for our family and knowing I never have to worry about money, eating, or many of the other things others have to stress over. I look at life as a gift and no matter how horrible I'm doing I know that the least I can is keep a clean home, children happy, and thus a happy husband.

I am so jealous! I long for some alone time to get a list ten miles long done! My kids went away for a week and I got half the basement cleaned out, an upstairs mess organized, a writing project done, a painting done, went to the gym every day (so easy without dragging three kids with me!) and watched some "me time" movies, and saw some friends!!!!! Things I otherwise NEVER DO!!!!! because my kids aren't in school yet.

Sounds like you're used to working h*** o* an outside schedule and are still reeling from the change. Allow yourself the "funk" but start making lists of what you want to do to arrange into a daily schedule once you're ready. It's really hard to have a totally "open ended day" become productive, but if you have a list, it's easy to follow. If you have a big house project (clean out garage) you want to have done by the end of May, start scheduling "an hour in garage" on certain days at certain times twice per week, and magically, it will painlessly get done by the deadline. Set goals and work backwards when making daily schedules.

If you really don't have anything you WANT to do, and all the stuff you should do is done, then throw yourself into job hunting and resume building (volunteering is good for resume) and maybe an online degree. (That's item #50 on my list if I finish everything else by the time my kids are all in school).

Easier said than done, but try to embrace the time!

The one most important piece of advice I can give you, that took me a while to learn, is GET DRESSED! Take a shower and get dressed in the morning shortly after you wake up. Don't just toss on sweats or wear your pj's around the house all day. You will get NOTHING done. I think it's psychological.

The days where I put on jeans and a bra with some semblance that I may step outside my door and interact with someone are the days I get the most stuff done.

I lay on the sofa all day eating Bon Bon’s like Peggy Bundy.....Yeah Right!!!

I clean day by day, not the entire house at once. My husband also works from home and is always leaving a mess. I am trying to attach a waste basket to his butt so I can get a little break.

I find that once I start doing something I will keep that rhythm going until it is done, or do some each day (it depends on what it is). I have been cleaning out my daughter’s closet and going through her toddler toys so we can donate them. Next week I will be cleaning out our garage and organizing it.

When i was home due to a layoff, I also had trouble being motivated. When you are working outside the home, you can easily tell yourself that "if I was home I could do so much stuff" but the reality is different. What helped me was making a list of things I wanted to get done. Then deciding that each day, I was going to do one or 2 of those things. The first couple of days I was easily sidetracked into something else. But after a week I was doing that one or things that led to another.

For someone who has been a stay at home it is a natural progression. Like as the kids get my independent you add more to the schedule.

I think in your case it would be harder, how much can you add, how long can you add it.

On a typical day I got up, got myself ready, drove the kids to school, worked out all morning and spent the afternoon hanging out with my friends. Productive I know. :p Then I would pick up the kids and run everyone around making dinner somewhere in there.

I'm a SAHM.
Both my kids are in school now.
However, I got a part-time job at my kids' school.
So I also then have the same schedule and holidays and vacations as them. So I feel fortunate about that and I get a little pocket change for myself.
But even before I got this job, I was always still busy everyday all day, even if my kids are in school.
I do all the household chores, errands, upkeep, cooking, laundry, taking my kids to school and picking them up, etc. And keeping track of my kids things/papers that they bring home daily. So my days are still full busy days.
I don't wait for motivation to happen. I just am on auto-pilot and do what I have to do. Daily.

I'm a SAHM with kids in school with my hubbys jobs (yep he has two) it makes it too hard for me to work full time. So I always get up and get dressed when they do. After I drop them off I head over to the gym and it gives me the energy boost i need to get through my day.