Son Cannot Write Name in Preschool

Hi~
I work with kids on handwriting. Handwriting is more than just writing letters. It includes:
* visual perceptual (how your eyes interpret what you are seeing),
* visual motor (message from your brain to your hand),
* postural control (maintaining an upright position),
* strength,
* endurance,
* prewriting skills (drawing shapes, diagonal lines, etc)
* sensory (feedback from your muscles and joint on keeping the correct pressure on the pencil/marker),
* use of both hands (one stabilizes, other writes),
* in hand manipulation (being able to walk fingers up/down pencil; turning pencil over using fingers, etc)
* pencil grasp (in which you need good hand skill development including:
- separation of radial side [thumb, pointer, middle fingers] and ulnar side [ring and pinkie fingers] of hand;
- good shoulder,
- elbow wrist stability;
- web space (space between thumb and pointer) stability
- arches in palm of hand
- range of motion in arms/hands
- etc….

So I guess I’m trying to say that it is hard to say what is causing the difficulty without evaluating him.
Since he is not holding his pencil correctly I would consider a pediatric occupational therapy (OT) evaluation (you will need a referral from your doctor). Pencil grasp can be helped now but if you wait until he is older it will be MUCH harder to change. The OT will assess all the above info to see why writing is hard for him. They should give you activities to help with writing that you will need to do at home.

Good luck!

PS as a person who has extensive training in child development it drives me crazy that schools are working on writing names starting at the age of 3 1/2 ... especially since they typically are not TEACHING writing). I'll step off my soap box now :)

8 moms found this helpful

Kids this age, in Preschool, do NOT write letters all the same size, nor legibly. Yet.
Not even 1st graders do.
Probably by 2nd or 3rd grade, "writing" uniformly really is noticeable.
I see/saw this all the time, as I volunteered in my daughter's classes since she was in Preschool. She is now 7 and in 2nd grade... and only "now", do I see her AND the other kids her grade level, writing more prettily/uniformly and "legibly."

He is fine. They do teach it in school.

all the best,
Susan

3 moms found this helpful

I am a pre-k teacher. My advice to you, is to keep working with him on it, in time it will come. Boys are different then girls, some boys take longer to learn skills than other boys. He may just not be interested in it. It will come, writing names is really a 5 year old skill, or kindergarten skill. I wouldn't worry. He will master it next year, but keep practicing. With the pencil if he is not holding it the correct way, give him a shorter pencil or break a crayon in half, it will force him to hold it the correct way. http://www.dltk-teach.com/alphabuddies/modern/modtitle.html with this website you can print your sons name out and he can practice tracing. I would try that for a while, will help him form the letters. But don't worry he will eventually get it. Every child learns differently.

3 moms found this helpful

He does not need to be able to do it perfectly. The important thing is that he knows the letters and the correct order..
He does not need to be evaluated. He is fine.
He sounds ready.. Most kindergartners do not know how to write much. They may scratch out their names but it is not always perfect.

We forgot to work on fine motor skills with our daughter so we worked on it a few weeks once school started and she was fine..

Have him roll little balls out of playdo. Have him connect a box of paper clips to make a chain. Have him use clothes pins to pick up things. Have him separate colored buttons, coins etc.. When you are folding clothes have him button up all of the shirts.. He should work on puzzles,

Have him draw with regular sized crayons and pencils. Teach him how to trace. He can use his finger or the colors or the pencil.

Have him eat blueberries using a toothpick (if you trust him to do this). Have him eat popcorn one kernel at a time. Have him string cereal into necklaces.

2 moms found this helpful

Not to worry about the way the print looks on the page just yet. I would concentrate on helping him to learn a proper pencil grip. You could try this wonderful little pencil called the twist-n-write. It is shaped like a "Y" and his finger goes in the middle, forcing a tripod grasp. You may be able to find them at staples or office max, but your best bet is online. Give them a try, and speak to his kindergarten teacher about it so that she is aware of your concern. If it does not improve by the end of kindergarten, or if you have any other fine motor concerns (or any behavioral, sensory, attentional, reading, phonemic awareness, or other learning issues) then pay attention and get an evalution sooner, rather than later. At this point, it is not something to be concerned about.

M.

2 moms found this helpful

Most kids who don't go to preschool can't write their names before they get to Kindergarten. Don't freak out... this is not a huge deal. Some people never write legibly - they turn out to be doctors and lawyers.
YMMV
LBC

2 moms found this helpful

My daughter is in preschool and starting kindergarden inthe fall also. She does not spell her name correctly either. Preschool is only to prepare them for kinderarden. Spelling theirname is something they will learn in Kindergarden. Don't worry. You can help him over the summer by having him practice his name once or twice a day. You can also spell his name out with refridgerator magnents. Mix them up and ask him to put them in order. Make learning his name fun and not a chore. Don't expect too much. My oldest daughter was spelling at age 3. My preschooler now is a lot different and she refuses to learn at anyone's pace but her own!

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M.,

I know you already received many responses, but I wanted to let you know what helped with my son. I am a homeschool mom and our son struggled with writing, still does sometimes, but we worked on writing with his fingers until his hands were ready to hold a pencil. Some of the ways you can do this is to put shaving or whipped cream in a pan and ask him to draw lines, circles, and other shapes for you in the cream. Show him how to make the shapes for his own name, then for your name, and then his sister's name.

You can also use different mediums like dried rice, wet sand, etc. to draw with his fingers. To strengthen his fingers and palms you can offer play dough and ask him to create different 3-D shapes such as a cube, sphere, cone, etc. Draw with a stick in the sand or use large sidewalk chalk and make different drawings.

Work on cutting skills and coloring with crayons, teaching him different ways to hold his fingers. He will not be very good at these techniques at first, but let him try, and even if he is not cutting or coloring perfectly don't step in and do it for him or it will silently tell him he's not good enough to accomplish the task on his own.

He most likely won't have a very long attention span for many of these activities, expect maybe the play dough. So don't force him to sit longer than he can. Once you are done with practicing a few shapes or letters, then let him play on his own. Over time he will start practicing the skills you have been teaching and slowly gaining mastery.

Good luck!

C. J.

2 moms found this helpful

I would not worry about this unless it is a prerequsite for your school. You could make it a fun game by having him write it on different paper, using chalk, using crayons or even kid safe shaving cream. I do believe this is typical with boys. Our teacher also focuses on hand strength. The children use small pencils to assist with this. She told us to have our daughter tear paper when recycling and.or use a squirt bottle.

I promise it will come in time.

1 mom found this helpful

I think it is normal for them to not write letters all the same size for a while yet , my son is in first grade and they have been working on this this school year. My daughter is also in preschool (she was 4 in December) and she can write her name but the letters are all different sizes and if she cannot fit it on one line she will put the last letter elsewhere on the page , she also has a Y in her name which she does backwards. I wouldn't worry about , they will do more practice in K and then first grade is when they start to knuckle down with it and writing sentences etc.

1 mom found this helpful

My son just finished Kindergarten -- he didn't go to pre-K, so he started the year not knowing how to write at all.

I wouldn't sweat it. Every child learns at a slightly different pace. Don't force him and turn it into something grueling. As another Mom suggested you might do some fun things this summer -- Have him write letters to Grandma/Grandpa, postcards while on vacation, etc --- but don't force it.

I'm sure he's going to be fine! :)

1 mom found this helpful

Kids develop at different rates. He'll be fine! It's unfortunate that children are pushed so hard at school during the first few years. Some children just aren't ready for reading and writing. It's NO reflection on intelligence. They just need more time. However, it's easy to push them too hard because we feel pressured to have them keep up. I wasn't writing my name in Kindergarten (I'm 46). There was no push for that when I was little. I have managed just fine! :)

1 mom found this helpful

When kids start kindergarten, they learn all of that. All kids coming in are at different levels, some know how to write, some don't, so don't sweat it. With my son's class (he's in kindergarten), they worked on their first name the first half of the year, then they worked on their last name the second half, so now she has them writing their full name's on all assignments. There were many kids in the class that not only couldn't write their name, but some didn't know how to spell it.

1 mom found this helpful

Girls seem to learn faster than boys. My 4.5 year old boy starts Kindergarten in Sept too and he can't really write either. Don't forget that some of the kids in his preschool might have older siblings; that usually means that the younger ones want to learn what the big ones are learning; for example, my son is taking martial arts and my three year old daughter is too young to take classes with him, however, she watches the class and has actually picked up on many of the things he is being taught; she's picked up so much that the owner of the dojo will allow her to be enrolled in classes four months before her fourth birthday (4 is the youngest they enroll in the kids classes.) Don't worry too much about the fact that your son can't write or hold a pencil well, that's one of the things he'll learn in Kindergarten, and if need be, they can have extra time spent with him. Good luck.

1 mom found this helpful

My son is 4 and finishing pre-K. He is getting better with handwriting, his letters are still not all the same scale.

The things I've been doing at home to help him (without driving him crazy) are lots of tracing pages (some letters some just tracing random designs and stuff). If he doesn't want to practice his name over and over, perhaps you can try printing line drawings of a character he likes and have him practice tracing those. As he develops more skill and control with the pencil he'll get better with his name as well (assuming he KNOWS the what the letters should look like).

Hope this helps.

T.

1 mom found this helpful

My son is just finishing up first grade and he doesn't even write his first name properly and his name is Kyle. I don't think it gets much easier than that. My oldest just finishing up third grade isn't perfect all the time and his name is Adam. Yes I choose easy just for this reason. My youngest is Alex and I don't expect him to get it right away either. I wouldn't worry too much about it just yet.

This was many years ago, but my grandma always tell the story about my mom refusing to write through I think about first grade. Apparently the teacher told my grandma not worry about it--she always knew the papers without a name were my mom's and the teacher said that my mom would write her name when she was ready. Here's the punchline. When my mom finally decided to write my grandma says her penmanship was extraordinary-- it was better than many adult's. My mom still has the most beautiful handwriting and though my grandma has been gone some years I always think of that story when I get handwritten cards and letters from my mom.

My very bright 4 1/2 year-old grandson can write his name, but the letter shapes, sizes, and spacing are really amusing.

As you've discovered, your little guy is feeling frustrated, perhaps embarrassed and annoyed at your expectations, because they are not yet within his grasp. Fine motor skills take whatever time they take to become developed and refined. And yes, boys often (not always) excell at gross motor skills but take longer with those more delicate operations.

He'll learn what he needs to learn in kindergarten. Don't give him any sense before then that he'll have trouble learning, or he'll start that great new adventure believing he's already failing.

My husband is 42 and still can't write his name legibly. I think it's a guy thing....

Seriously, I agree with the other posters. Not a thing to worry about. My son had a really unusual grip and I was told not to try and fix it, that it would correct itself. Of course, I didn't listen and went out and bought a really good pencil grip for him so that he would use a tri-pod grasp. Never happened.

He is now in 4th grade and still uses that same wonky grip on his pencil, but his writing has really improved. My daughter's handwriting is very good, but she will sit still long enough to make that happen!

His kindergarten teacher will let you know if there is anything you should be concerned about. Until then, keep practicing and keep it fun for him. Good luck!

just play a game.. like say look i can make an A... but put a Z.. and see if he notices... say can you help me.. make an A..... do things like that.. and good luck.. is he young?? going to kindergarten.. maybe he isn't ready.. see what the school says ... ask the pre school what they think...

I see you have a lot of response but just wanted to throw out there that in January my 3-1/2 year old couldn't hold a crayon or pencil correctly and wouldn't even try to color. He went to 3 school for a semester so he was worked with some but when I saw the biggest difference was when he suddenly became obsessed with stencils. Its all he wanted to do for a couple of weeks. I would also reiterate don't stress about it or rush but if you want to guide a bit I think stencils are great. I am sure someone out there would find a reason to disagree but.... :) I guess the only thing i can think of is it could be hard to transition to free hand but my son is doing great. He also asks me to hold his hand when he does some letters....

It is common for boys and girls to have a 1-2 year developmental (physical and emotional) gap. However, I think learning to write your name in pre school is a lot! Don't push it, he'll get it. :)

It is not unusual for boys to develop later in the fine motor area. It's hard to believe, but if you want to help him with him fine motor skills, then you need to take him outside and throw balls with him. Fine motor development starts from the chest and works it's way down the arms, so the stronger the arms and shoulders are, the easier time he will have with writing. Just try to make it fun and not make a big deal out of it. It will come in time. Good Luck!

i would work on it at home, but not push it, yet, but really try to get him to do things that get him holding a pencil or crayon. Even just to color or draw, so he cant get the feel of it.

My stepson is in 2nd grade, and his writing is still very inlegible. We asked the teachers about this every year, and we are told that they don't teach the kids how to write anymore. That since everything is computerized, they let kids do what they want. They feel that by teaching them writing they are not allowing the kids to be creative, so they can write how they want. I find this very disturbing, so when he is with us in the summer, he does a lot of writing, just to try and get better. his mom doesn't care, so it's on us to try and teach him to write.

At this point they more he can even just draw and color the better when getting him to write.

I am appalled to hear that some schools aren't teaching writing "because everything is computerized". My 2nd grader is bringing home worksheets on cursive writing EVERY NIGHT lately. And spelling lists (autobiography, belligerent, catastrophe for a 7 yr old!) And yes, he wrote big and little letters for his name interchageably until.....hmm, a few weeks ago (haha)! I admit there was more free-style in printing than in cursive training (ah, those lined pages will bring some consistency yet).
Some kids in my son's K-class did not know their letters coming in....the schools cannot make the assumption that the kids are getting that training through pre-school or at home prior to a formal education. While my son's preschool made academics (letters, numbers, reading) a part of their day, everyone developed at their own pace.

Not to worry, they will work on all that in kindergarten. To help him become accustomed to holding the pencil and a tri-pod grasp, I would go to your nearest learning supply store and pick up a rubber pencil grip that is molded so that you automatically hold your pencil in the correct position. Other than that, don't worry and don't push. Actually, developmentally, a lot of kids don't develop the tri-pod grasp until they are well into kindergarten. If you push the matter, you are actually going against nature and may cause some damage to his hand and thumb, and you will also turn him off from the whole experience.

Common with boys. You can work on the pencil holding during the summer - maybe make a game or two out of it. Have him also write his name in the dirt and sand and with sidewalk chalk. Boys are often better large muscle creatures and fine motor stuff comes later.

My son won't be 4 until August, but his older sister has decided to teach him to write his name. I noticed that he wasn't holding his pencil correctly, so I did something I learned when my older kids were in Montessori school: I bought him some of those LARGE pushpins.... What you do is draw a simple shape, like a square or circle, on a piece of paper about the size of one fourth of a sheet of notebook paper. I am teaching him how to press the pin to make holes along the line of the shape (you can put the paper on a cardboard or on the carpet). As he gets better at it, he will make his holes closer together and the shape will pop out as if it was cut with a jagged pair of scissors. And when he masters the basic shapes, I'll move on to more complex shapes (I remember when my kids were 4 and learning about continents at their Montessori school-- they had shapes of the continents to do this activity)....anyway, the point is it's nearly impossible to hold the huge pushpin incorrectly to make it make a hole... and this builds the fine motor skill of how to hold a pencil correctly. No need to get OT for a preK kid! His kindergaretn teacher will work with him, and you can help him yourself in teh meantime.

I think some boys just have bad handwritting! My son is beyond in his 1st grade level in spelling, math and reading but has the worst handwritting in the class. I mean bad!! He is at least a grade level below on handwritting and a grade level or two ahead in studies. I talked to his teacher about it and she went and got him a handwritting book he does in class daily. I also made him write daily over last summer. The first month or so he wrote his abc's and then he learned to write our address and number the last month. And he still had the worst handwritting in class!! So don't feel alone. The biggest suggestion his teacher had was to work on fine motor skills. Sadly my son has NEVER colored and he hates art projects. We think this may be part of it. He never developed those fine motor skills. So this summer he has to write and color daily. Pure torture for him! I would just make sure to work with him all summer and tell his Kinder teacher next year. Once they know where a child needs an extra push, they usually step up in that area!

Hi M.,

I read all the posts so far, and I think you're getting some really great advice here. I love AJ's list she has provided - great stuff, AJ!

My own son had a lot of early intervention with speech and language, as well as OT for sensory integration disorder. While at the neurologist's office getting an evaluation, the doctor noticed a problem with his right hand that no one had picked up on. He was 4 years old. It turned out that he had a weakness in his hand, and the doctor recommended Occupational Therapy for that. I ran across an OT who specialized in handwriting, offering group (or individual) classes. It was a great fit, because he could learn his letters, learn to write them, and work on his hand problem all at the same time. She used "Handwriting Without Tears" by Jan Olsen, which our school district used as well.

The thing is, everyone here is correct in saying that a child shouldn't have to write in preschool. My son had some real delays and I just worked on everything to get him caught up and school ready. He took these classes for 2 years. It wasn't because I wanted him to do things early - he had problems that needed to be addressed, and I used a method that kind of took care of several issues.

Really use a lot of the ideas that have been given here, as FUN ways to prepare his hand. That's really important.

All my best,
D.

No worries, many kids can not properly write their name when they start kindergarten. It is one of the first things they will learn when they start school next year.

I didn't read the other responses, but this is what I can offer. It used to be that Kindergarten was when they learned EVERYTHING. Now we are expecting kids to know these things before they get there. A hundred years of education doesn't lie. Your child is fine. All children are at different places in their learning. Some are reading in Kinder, some are learning their letters. It doesn't make them less intelligent, it makes them normal. The teacher for his Kinder will be expecting all levels of learning. It will even out by the end of the year. If not, then you can start to worry/be proud. I only have boys, so I can't say what girls do or don't do. I do know that if you are consistent with reading to him and encouraging him that he will be just fine. Over the summer you might think about printing out some things for him to practice, but I wouldn't worry about it.

instead of having him write them buy letters and have him spell with them make a game of it spell more than just his like your name mom dad sister brother stuff like that have a game with it that helps.

You are describing my daughter as well, acting silly, loses interest. She can write her name but sometimes does one letter REALLY big or on two lines, etc. I was also told my her preschool teachers not to worry too much about it, there's months left before kindergarten and they will be working on that a lot next year. Many of the kids in her preschool class are still working on holding a writing instrument correctly, and some of them don't write their names at all, or they write them backwards.