Sleeping Through the Night... - Phoenix,AZ

I love the book, "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child." There are a lot of ideas and scenerios of what can work. In most of the info. I've read, most babies don't usually start a sleep through the night schedule until 4 mo. old. Hope this book is helpful for you.

I have never follwed the babywise method so I am not very familiar with it. I do have 3 children and all of them, even while breastfeeding, slept through the night by 8 weeks. I can't say it was their weight either because the last one was only 9 lbs. 13 oz at 4 months and she still slept 12 hours a night by 8 weeks. I have never actually attempted to try to get the kids to sleep through the night - they just seemed to do it. However, I do have a bedtime routine that some people have suggested might be the reason they sleep so good. I took a class on infant massage and I gave each one of our children an infant massage everynight as part of the bedtime routine. There are books you can buy to help you with the techniques, but I actually used oil(organic olive oil so if they put their hands or feet in their mouths it's okay) and massaged the entire body. There are different areas you focus on for specific concerns, there are even things you can do for stomach aches. This became such a fun time everynight because after about a week the baby would actually look forward to it and it was relaxing for both of us. I would follow the massage with a nice warm bath (to wash the oil off) and then lavender lotion and feeding and a bedtime story. I have always tried to lay my kids down when they were sleepy but not asleep because later on then I would be able to put them to bed without having to worry about them being sound asleep and that carries them into when they get older (I now can tell my 5 and 3 yr olds to get in bed and they do it without an argument). I really hope there is something here you can use because I know it gets long when you are getting up several times a night.
If you are interested there are classes at the hospital for infant massage (at least there were when my 5 yr-old was born). You just have to call or maybe look online. Also Life Sculpting in Chandler has some classes this month on the Developing Infant. Their website is www.lifesculpting.biz
Good luck.

My daughter did not sleep through the night until nearly 7 months. She still wanted a nighttime feeding and we introduced the pacifier when we wanted to eliminate that feeding. That worked because she could satisfy her need to suckle.

At 2 1/2 months I am shocked that anyone is telling you he "should" be sleeping through the night. That is so young. Babies are born knowing how to do ONE thing - suckle. It is a powerful urge, a need rather than a want, and very soothing. If he's looking to suckle, he wants food, or he wants soothing... which he's looking for the parents to provide. He is only 10 weeks old.

If he is used to 2 feedings a night and then you eliminate both, how could he not be hungry? A baby knows when they are hungry. I would try to get him onto one feeding a night for a few months before I'd even try to take away the feedings altogether.

When you feed a child according to your schedule, not theirs, you may be offering food when they are not really hungry, so they will not eat vigorously and take a large meal. Then, of course they are hungry later and if it's not on the schedule and the parents refuse to feed him, the baby learns that he cannot trust his self-regulating cues. He learns that his hunger is not relevant to whether or not food will be offered. Obviously, I don't agree with this at all.

I don't mean to be harsh or critical. Being a new mom is SO hard, but I think you should lower your expectations based on what a person or a book tells you your baby "should" be doing. This is YOUR baby and you know it best. It is more important to meet a baby's needs and have him be calm and secure than to have him frustrated and/or hungry and insecure.

I would consider reading up on Attachment Parenting for a different point of view that is gentler and more accommodating to a babies' needs. Every baby has different sleeping and eating needs.

Babywise has been widely criticized for many reasons by parents and doctors. It is considered by many to be too harsh, too rigid and has even been linked with Failure-To-Thrive and dehydrated babies. Some hospitals refer to dehydrated babies as "Ezzo babies" because the strict feeding schedule often results in babies not getting enough food.

Of course, you must decide if Babywise is good for you, but do consider reading some other things and not necessarily adhering to one principle only. All babies are different and unique. Your son will eventually sleep through the night. I know it seems like it will never happen and you will never get a good night's sleep again, but it will come sooner or later! All the best!

HI C.-
I wrote a response, and then the computer went haywire and I think it got erased..
Then I read some of the other responses and thought I'd better give you a private message instead.
I used Babywise, and never starved my babies as some of the other suggested! The plan was set up to be helpful, but of course, you ARE the mom and you know if your baby is not thriving. You can always add feedings or supplement if you don't feel like they are getting enough. I don't agree with everything in the books, but my three boys responded great to the plan and it was very helpful to our family. One thing I wish was that I could have learned to be a bit more flexible with my first one... that really helped with my other boys.
All 3 boys were sleeping through the night by about 3 months.... although my middle's son's schedule got all messed up when we moved. It took about a month to get him back sleeping through the night again.
Don't give up on the plan... give it some more time and patience. Your baby will catch on before you know it and life will get easier. It definitely worked for us. There's no way I could have lived through 3 boys under age 4 if it hadn't!
On pacifiers, they are definitely helpful. If you feel like he needs it, then use it. Keep them in all parts of the house. Soon he will be old enough to grab it and stick it in himself! My oldest son loved them, middle son wouldn't take anything-- now THAT was annoying! My 3rd son loved his thumb. That's not as easy to break!
I hope I've been of some help. You can email me anytime.
Toni from Gilbert
____@____.com
P.S. You are going to get ALOT of advice. Remember to not stress out and just enjoy your baby. Do what you feel is right and don't get confused and frustrated with too much info!
Take care

My little guy will be two months old on March 9th. He is just beginning to sleep through the night, which is amazing. He is over 11lbs, but I don't think that is why is he sleeping through the night. I believe babies will sleep through the night when they are developmentally ready. Both his father and I starting sleeping through the night when we were only about a month old, so I don't know if it has something to do with genetics?? I do follow a relaxing schedule at night that includes a warm bath at the same time every night, a massage with oil in his low lit room, and I rock him until he gets sleepy. I basically just calm him down at the same time every night.I also make sure he goes to bed with a full belly. I have recently put him in his crib in his own room as well. I was thinking that my husband's snoring might wake him up so I moved him to a more quiet environment :) From what I understand most babies do not start sleeping through the night until they are 3-4 months old. I also don't agree with Babywise. I believe it is too strict for infants. I'm not sure that crying it out is good at this young either. That might work better as he gets a bit older. Your son is still so little. Right now he just needs to know that you will always be there for him (even in the middle of the night). At this point I would do whatever the little guy needs. Feed him, cuddle him, rock him, let him suckle. I don't believe that things you do now will always turn into habit. He will be sleeping through the night before you know it! Good luck!

I have used Babywise for all 4 of my boys and am so glad I did. My first was nearly 4 months old before he slept through the night and I wondered why. Then I re-read the book and it states that 76% of baby boys will sleep through the night by 9 weeks and 96% by 12 wks. Even though he started sleeping through the night around 4 months, it was worth me helping him by putting him on a schedule. Be encouraged to continue on as you are, it will happen and it is quite OK if your baby is in that 4%, mine was. And to my delight the other 3 were thriving as they started sleeping through the night between 2-3 months. As the Ezzos say, every baby is different.

Dear C.,

I'm kind of alarmed that your ped thinks a 2 1/2 month-old baby should be sleeping through the night. Really, that's not something that I would expect before six months, and I really wouldn't force the issue before then. We tried to do babywise too and it was a disaster. Things finally got better when we pulled our little guy in bed with us and let him nurse when he wanted to during the night. We did the cry-it-out method when he was older (over 6 mos.) and it worked beautifully then, because he was ready for it. But there are very few 2 1/2 month-olds sleeping through the night. Best wishes!!

Our little one didn't start sleeping through the night until later and even then it's off and on. Now it's more on than off.

It's not bad to nurse when they want to suckle -- and some babies have a schedule of their own (outside the babywise schedule). :-)

Does he feed more often in the evenings? Our little one was 10 lb, but still didn't sleep through the night -- only about 5 or 6 hours. Now she sleeps longer.

I hope this helps.

I did babywise for both my boys also. The magic number in weight is 13 pounds. Also, once you are there, there will be nights that he wakes and nights he does not. It gets too complicated to try and figure it all out. If it was me,I would still feed him when he awakens, it is still early for him to sleep through the night. Also, boys tend to awaken more often than girls.
I also suggest a nighttime ritual. We do bath, bottle, bed. No playtime after bath, it was CD in their room for nursing and cuddle then right to bed.
So, don't follow the Babywise book as a Bible, just use it as a guide, you are Mom and you know what is best for your baby.. He will drop a feeding soon. You are doing a great job and he is growing and thriving. Hang in there.

Looks like you've got lots of answers already but I'll add my two cents. I haven't read Baby Wise but I have a 30 month old and a 13 month old that are both great sleepers.

First off, two and a half months is a little early to be hoping for an uninterrupted night. Don't let your doctor, your family, or even strangers on the internet TELL you what your child should be doing at what age. All anyone can really offer is a guideline and even that isn't usually accurate. And try not to stress out because he's not sleeping through the night yet. It will only lead to stressing about every other thing in his life....when he crawls, walks, talks, etc. And that's more pressure than a baby can handle! :-) Your little man is completely and totally unique. And, eventually, (I promise) you'll have him all figured out.

Secondly, (everyone say it with me): PACIFIERS ARE OUR FRIENDS. One of the most important milestones in your child's life is when he's old enough to reach for his pacifier at night and put it in his own mouth (hopefully around 4-6 months). Once that happens, buy four and place them in each corner of his crib, in the same place, every night. After a bit, he'll start to know exactly where to find one when he wants it. And YOU, my friend, will have a good night's sleep. (If you want to speed this process up, don't buy the pacifiers that can only be put in "right-side-up" since it takes a little longer for babies to figure that part out. Instead, buy the kind that can be put in upside down as well and still feel the same. Walmart has some silicone Winnie the Pooh pacifiers that I LOVE.)

And don't worry about getting him addicted to the pacifier. Sure, many months down the road, you might have a couple of rough nights when you take it away. But that's another problem for another day. And it's MORE than worth it...trust me.

In the meantime, hang in there. Don't stress about ANYTHING that you don't absolutely have to. And, most importantly, learn to take naps.

Best of luck, C.!

-S.