Sleep Help - Virginia Beach,VA

Good responses all~
The only thing I'd add, (and I'm late in the day), is to swaddle in a STRETCHY big cotton receiving blanket, (mine stretched out so bad you'd think it was for toddlers- by Gerber, I think?) and leave one arm out to see how that goes. My guy was swaddled til 4.5 mos. because of the startle reflex...woke himself up, poor thing. I also started putting him on his side, bolsting him up with roled up blanket and he liked that...at least he slept better. Good luck.

Dear N.,

"Cold Turkey" method....it may sound harsh, but if she has peace of mind, contentment, and feels safe with your love then she doesn't need the comfort of swaddling. Perhaps you could just rock or pat her for a short while to help soothe her to sleep. I'm sure you probably already use it, but music is a wonderful soother for falling asleep. My 2 year old son still listens to the same music box before falling asleep for nap time and bed time. As difficult as it may be to hear her cry in the beginning, you will be doing both of you a favor by removing the swaddle blanket from her routine and give her a few minutes (if you're not already doing so) when she is awakened by the startle reflex. We want to help our children learn to help themselves, so even a couple of minutes to allow her to self-soothe will be a positive thing. I hope this helps :-) Best Wishes to you & your baby girl

It sounds like your baby still needs the security of swaddling - have you tried using a baby-sized blanket instead of a swaddling device? When our girls were really tiny we used those flannel receiving blankets you get in a 5 pack then moved up to a baby blanket in a lightweight cotton to give us some extra material to swaddle with.

Just in case you didn't learn in the hospital, one way to swaddle with a blanket is to first fold it into a triangle with the point facing you and the long end away from you. Place the baby on the blanket, feet just above the 'point'. Wrap one of the long edges around the baby, tucking it in nice and tight under her. Fold up the 'point' to enclose her feet, then wrap the last edge around her body, adjusting the tightness to her comfort level. In my experience, my kids did better when their swaddling was nice and tight. There are several ways to swaddle - hope that helps!

Confession: I put each of my children on their stomachs because of their startle reflexes waking them up. I keep them in a crib in our room, in our bed, or have a baby monitor on while I do that so I can listen for trouble. My sisters did the same, and so do many of my cousins and friends. I think the last poll I heard was that 45% of moms put their babies on their stomachs, in spite of the "back to sleep" campaign. By 6 months, you are safe from SIDS anyway.

My first was a disaster when it came to sleep habits. I used Dr Hull's sleep tight video and website to establish a consistent routine and wean her off of needing Mommy there to sleep at night(and with minimal tears). Dr Hull provided extra support via email that was helpful when I had specific issues/questions as well. I highly recommend his website and video!!!!
A.

I'm a Mother of a 22 year and a 25 year old. My 22 year old was similar to your 9-1/2 month old. When he started to grow out of his swaddler, I got a bigger blanket. Some children find it more comforting to be craddled tighter than others. My oldest never needed that but my youngest needed it for a very long time. Even when he was a small child he liked to have the covers tucked in tight. When I asked my doctor about it I was told that it had something to do with being tucked in tight inside my womb. Since he was a large baby when he was born, it made sense. My oldest son was much smaller, so that's why it made sense to me. I don't know if this will help you, but it did help my son. I just bought a bigger blanket, one that wasn't real heavy, sort of thin, and used that instead. He slept, but still not through the night. As for being tired, I truly do feel for you. I was there myself and there were many nights I just wanted to sleep and couldn't. Try a larger blanket, but try to get one that is thin. I hope it works and I hope you get some sleep. One last thing, I never put my son on his back, he always slept on his side. But since I'm an older Mom and back sleeping wasn't the thing to do back then, I never had to worry about his arms coming out of his blanket. As he got older he slept on his stomach with his face turned to one side or the other.

If she is too big for the swaddling blanket that you have, you could use a regular blanket and tuck it in, but I can understand your concern that it may not hold. Another solution may be to make a blanket using the old swaddler as a model and just attach velcro to a bigger blanket after you cut "wings" to wrap around your daughter. I'm sorry I don't have more suggestions for you, but my son hated being swaddled, so we never even used the swaddlers that we had. Good luck and I hope it works out for you!

I am surprised she still lets you swaddle her. My adivce is to get her used to not being swaddled by placing rolled up blankets around her in the crib. You can also try laying her on her tummy to sleep, since by now there is not risk of SIDS and she would be less likely to startle herself from this position. Swaddling children for too long can actually delay motor skills like crawling, so you will probably see a change in her motor skills. Good Luck :)

I was never able to swaddle my son effectively so I made him some bumpers for his crib that really limited his wiggle room and that really helped him sleep. I have also seen where they sell a mat with bumpers for cribs.