Should I Have My 8 Year Old Son Evaluated by EDIS?

Updated on May 20, 2008
K.G. asks from FPO, AP
14 answers

Hello
For years I have been tormenting myself about whether I should get my son evaluated. I have an appointment with EDIS tommorow and am starting to get cold feet. I am concerned that if I involve the military that there will be alot of red tape and intrusions. We homeschool mainly due to difficulties he has had in public/dodds school. There are days when I suspect he has aspergers. He is the king of interruptions..he is hyper alot and he gets completely obsessed with things. Right now his latest obsession is webkins and he talks nonstop about them from the minute he cracks his eyes open until he closes them at night.He is difficult to homeschool but he is tracking...I am afraid if he were in regular school he would be in trouble alot. He is very bright and creative! He is a very kinestetic learner. He often acts out what he has learned with his stuffed animals. I am confident that, in spite of the difficulties he is learning at home. I am concerned that if I have him evaluated through EDIS they will impose their ideas of what is right for our son. I am also afraid of the label but I do want to know what I am needing to educate myself about. Medication is not an option unless if it is a chemical disorder and it is determined through medical testing that he needs something his body is unable to produce naturally such as insulin or lithium. I have put this testing off for years now. I am wondering if I should cancel the testing and have it done privately so that it does not become a part of his permenant medical record. If anyone has any viewpoints on this I would appreciate them. I want to know if my hesitation is unfounded or should I cancel the appointment? Thank you.
Kim

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A.B.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

If you are concerned he may have a condition, I'd definitely go ahead and do it. They can give you all the suggestions they want, but you are his caregiver and decisionmaker. If you know what his condition is then you may be able to look at how to handle situations differently to make it easier on you both.

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D.D.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

Kim,
Do not cancel the appointment! If your son is diagnosed with Autism spectrum disorder there are a ton of services he would be eligible for. If you cancel the appointment he could be cheated out of the opportunity to become the best person that he can be. I understand that you feel you know what is best for him, but be flexible. Give EDIS a chance to provide you and your son with the tools needed to be successful. They can even help to integrate him into a classroom. A child with Autism/Aspergers needs to learn,with some assistance at first, to interact with his peers. The longer you wait the more difficult it will become for him to cope with social situations.
Even if it is not Aspergers they may be able to provide you with some resorced to make homeschooling a little less stressful for both of you.
I hope that you consider my advice. I speak from experience. I have a little boy, almost 8, who was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum High Functioning just over three years ago. He has come a long way with the help of EDIS and the dodds school system. There are wonderful people out there who care about you and your child and they want to help!
Sincerly,
D.

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C.G.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

I personally think that it takes a town to raise a child. I have 4 of my own and my 2 oldest 14, and 10 are both boys and they both have been evaluated and have ADD. The inattentive kind, they're not hyper what-so-ever. But they've been tested and evaluated and put through a ringer. Medication was our very last resort also. We changed diets and took out all sugar, and all that, but none of it helped at all. Poor fellas just have attention spans of about 3 and 7 minutes=) Bless their hearts. I have many teacher friends who say that keeping a child with a disorder from proper medication is like keeping a person with diabetes from their insulin. Everyone thinks of this differently tho. I don't think that having him evaluated is a bad thing. They can't force you to do anything you don't want to, but they are a great source of information. This is what they do, and the people that I have come into contact with have been wonderful, and my friends who have had EDIS come out and do speech therapy and such sing their praises. It can't hurt anything, and they may even have some pointers. They aren't in your sons life everyday, and may see things that you (being with him 24/7) haven't. Like a "not being able to see the forest for the trees" kind of thing=) You really don't have anything to lose. Your son is very lucky to have such a great mom who is so concerned with his wellbeing. Good luck, I don't think that you'll regret having EDIS see him.

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L.K.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

Hello K.,

We had our daughter tested at EDIS and they were very professional and personal to work with. She also receives Therapy at EDIS too!

I think it would help if your could find out what the root cause is, maybe then you would know how to best help your son. I know it can be scary to get the testing done, yet it can be helpful too!

We have our Daughter currently attending Bob Hope Primary and She's doing very well..She receives Therapy and her regular Kindergarten Curriculum there too.

I wish the best for you..I hope it works out for you.

I know that having a child with Special needs is challenging,yet seeing the daily blessings in your Child, are worth it!

Best of Luck,

Lady Rhia

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T.W.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

You absolutely should. Being that I work at a school, I see children with all sorts of disorders and it is crucial to get the help that EDIS can provide as early on as possible. The military won't step in and do anything unless you let them, but they are so willing to help and to make sure that you obtain the best services they can provide and that when you leave that you go to a place where you can get the absolute best care you need for whatever it is that is determined. They will provide services for you, your family and most importantly your child. I've seen too many children fall through the cracks because they didn't have access to the services that we as military are SO LUCKY to have. Don't deny yourself or your child from this exceptional benefit provided by the military. Best of luck Kim.

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N.G.

answers from Columbus on

We went through EDIS, and for the most part were happy with the experience, the only thing I didn't like was the rude man who did the hearing checks on my daughter. EDIS worked with us to develop a plan that worked for us and did not label my child and you always have the option of discontinuing service if they are not working for your child. I was surprised to hear that EDIS is evaluating a school-age child, here they only work with children up to age 3. And don't completely discount DODDS. My child has some mild symptoms of Asperger's and hs done very well in her DODDS school. They were very open in listening to us and developing a plan that works for her. Like you I was worred about things being on her permanent records, both medical and educational. The EDIS stuff is not even in her medical records. As far as education I was worried she'd be judged or treated differently by teachers or other staff at the school, but she hasn't been at all. Like you, medication is not an option for us, and that is exactly why EDIS and DODDS has worked so well for us. Even if you don't want to send him to school full-time, I know lots of people who send their kids to DODDS half-day or just for specials such as Art and Music. Don't get me wrong, I'm not against home-schooling at all, while it doesn't work for my daughter, I have a lot of friends who home-school and our local home-schooling network does some very creative and interesting activities. I wish you and your son the best of luck.

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R.T.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

Well my son does not have the same problem as your son but he was evaluated by EDIS and it was not bad at all. He goes there for his appointments to see if their is any progress and they give me their feedback and that is it. They give me ideas that I could do at home but their is no one saying do it this way or that way and thats it. Now I can get the extra help and he can get the extra attention that he needs so that he can do better in school. U really do not think that EDIS is all military because they have this same type of program in the states while we were in Texas and it was called Texas Health STEPS.

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C.U.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

Hi K.,
I just read your story and not sure what you decided (sorry I am late with this response) but wanted to tell you not to worry about seeking help. Knowledge is always BEST when it comes to helping your (possible) special needs child.
A full medical work up is also a great idea to give you a good look at what is going on. Might I suggest checking for allergies (specialist does small injections on arm and checks for reaction) if you haven't already don't so. I have worked with autistic spectrum children for over 20 years and have seen some behaviors decrease dramatically with diet changes, removal of pets, etc.
The school district in Japan should have an autism specialist on staff who might be able to tap into some resources for you. EDIS is a good option and trust me, you want testing done while you are still active duty and this service is free. A simple IQ test can cost you big bucks, not to mention a complete battery of testing to help determine autism.
Labeling your child may seem scary but if they do require added assistance as they get older, it's best to have that well documented. For example, many universities have programs that assist special needs students. You can find great programs in the states, too, that teach transition from high school into work programs (for example). In other words, whether you chose to place your child in a program to help meet his social needs at this early age, or wait, it doesn't hurt to have a history of paperwork to turn to when you do need that extra help.
Your ACS might have play groups and activities. I know our ACS here in Heidelberg has teen events with pizza, etc. Check into it - for sure there is an EFMP coordinator who could take you into a parent group for support. Good luck.

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C.S.

answers from Bismarck on

Hi, my son was evaluated by EDIS here in England and we loved it. They were not military people just contracted therapist in their field. Two therapist came to our house and evaluated my son one would go through the paperwork and write and the other would just play with my son. But what she was playing with him was how they evaluated him. Through that they determined what areas he needed help with and with my husband and I we talked through what goals we wanted to accomplish with his sessions and how often they would work with him. They would adjust it to fit into everyones schedule. Our therapist would come to our house. During the sessions it was more like a play date then a school class. But what she brought was specific to what she was trying to get him to work on. Here they only work with children until they are 3 but our Elementry School has a program that he could get into to continue working with a speech therapist. I met with the teacher and therapist and we talked out the goals that he would work on and how often he would go to school. He has been in school for almost a year now and he loves it, and our family loves it. He has learned and developed so much with all the help that he has gotten. And I feel less stress about the fact that he does not talk like other children his age. I would really suggest going through with the evaluations and looking into all options for your child. In the end you can always change the program. They are only there for your childs best interest.

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L.A.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

In a sense, I understand your fear of the unknown...but in the same thought, I read that you want to know so that you can direct your teachings accordingly so your child does not go without the proper means.

My opinion through examples...(and I can only come from a moms point of view because I am not a licensed doctor/therapist/couselor/all of the above) (1) If my child got hurt on the playground, I would ask him questions and then evaluate the situation as to whether I can do home remedies or if I need a professional to treat him. (2) If my child got his feelings hurt from what I said, I would change my tone and my words, take his feelings into consideration, yet still get the same point across. and (3) If my child has some difficulties completing a school project, then I will help as much as I can and if its past my capabilities, then I will need to seek a tutor for him.

what I am trying to get across to you is that no matter what we do, we need to understand that our (1) decision making and (2) personal changes, and (3) trust for others to help our kids can be more difficult and painful than giving birth itself.

I think that you should definitely get your child checked out for his own benefit. If you don't, it is only you to blame due to your fears rather than looking out for what is best for your son and getting him proper treatment.

If you still have reservations about the military, you can always get a second opinion.

If your child is under age 3, then YES, EDIS is the place that you would go where it is totally voluntary and confidential. If he is over the age of 3, he would get evaluated by Child Find.

whatever the outcome would be, why not have it in his permanent record? If you were incapacitated and he was "acting out", wouldn't you want to have someone read that he has "something" rather than label him as something he is not? just some things to think about.

sorry that its lengthy, but I'm sure that you understand. We sometimes have to say to ourselves that "I've done the best I can and I need help beyond my control"

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B.G.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

Hello. I have not had experience with EDIS myself but I wanted to address the issue you have with 'labeling'. It used to be taboo to have a 'label'. However, now that 'label' is just a help for your child. It will allow the military to be sure you are in a place in which whatever services he may need are available to you. If he doesn't need anything, then it is not a problem. Labels make the law work for you. They protect your child and make sure that he is worked with in the least restrictive environment appropriate for him and his situation. No one can push any treatment or medication that you do not want. Just remember that you are the parent and you get to make the decisions. If a recommendation makes you feel uncomfortable, research it before making any decisions. The internet (and this site) are wonderful resources. Also, remember that his medical record is confidential. It can not come back to haunt him later in life unless he allows is. Plus, it is against the law to use medical records to discriminate. I know it is scary but this seems as if it is just a fact finding mission and knowledge is power. I have a cousin that probably has Aspergers and has never been diagnosed because of his mother's insistent that he not be 'labeled'. He is graduating high school by the skin of his teeth and has had a miserable experience. He will never go on to college because of it. He could be so much more and could have had so much help learning to cope had he been diagnosed. Now he will probably always live at home and not drive and only do minimal jobs yet he is not that bad...just needed to learn coping skills. So, gather your knowledge and research and decide what works best for your child's unique situation and how you can help him. Maybe you may need help from others or maybe you can give him the help he needs. You'll never know until you know what you are dealing with. Good luck.

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V.T.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

Don't be afraid of EDIS...I know it can be very scary and difficult...when my son started having trouble in school everyone including my mom told me to have him evaluated and I said NO!! There could not possibly be anything I could not solve myself so I stressed myself out helping him with all his home work and class assignments at night because he was not finishing them in school. We bought extra books to help him catch up because he was falling behind and when I realized my daughter was starting to resent all the extra attention he got I realized I needed help. He was diagnosed with ADHD and ODD(oppositional defiance disorder). He got the counseling he needed and through several months of trials of no meds, meds, all natural meds, we were able to get him settled on a low dose med that let's him be him with a little help to focus. He has been on them for 2 years now with no change in dosage and he is doing great! Actually makes the honor roll. We also keep him on a special diet with Sunday off he gets to pick his favs to eat that day. Summers off the meds and we do lots of brain building activities with him that help him focus as he gets older. Just remember to have the knowledge is better then sitting in the dark wondering.....what harm can it do? You would be shocked at all the resources the Military has to offer and by no means will your son ever be labeled unless you label him. And remember you are in charge what works for some does not always work for others. Hope that helps.....

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C.D.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

My nehpew has this EDIS. I wasn't big on them putting him on meds for it, but it seems to be helping him. My little brother is also in the miltary. He is in a public school they make sure that he has a teacher that can deal with this extra enegry at his last school he was in a smaller group of kids.

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M.H.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

Hi Kimberly,

I first want to say that it sounds like you are doing a great job with a very challenging situation. Kudos! That being said, I think all of us need help and guidance from professionals at one time or another. I don't think you should delay the evaluation any longer. You never mentioned how old your son is, but I never think it's too early for intervention. Just because your son is being evaluated by EDIS doesn't mean they're in control. You are still the parent and have the final say in your son's educational and therapeutic future. You need to put his needs first, and lay your fears aside. So what if an evaluation is on his permanent record? If they don't find anything, no harm no foul. If they do, then you can get busy helping him. The sooner the better. Just keep in mind that doctors are not Gods and that YOU have choices. If there is a finding, then know this will not be an easy road. Parenting seldom is, especially with a child with special needs. Ignoring the problem will not change the situation, just make it worse and more difficult to deal with as time goes by. I'm an educator who has dealt with many children in need of therapy. As parents, it is difficult to accept that our children might need help. But, have you ever thought that maybe your son would be happier if he learned to cope with some of his issues? He might find great stimulation and gratification from outside sources. He might find other kids who are just like him! Whatever you decide, remember that you need to do it out of love and not fear. Just take the plunge. I think you will be glad you did. Good luck and God bless.

M.

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