Reluctantly Weaning... Need Advise!

First, resolve to do what you are doing. It will be easier on your and on him. Kids sense stress - and indecision. They work it! Thankfully he takes a bottle easily!As babies grow, one has to expect 'trauma' - meaning crying, arching the back, etc. They have a will and life does not always go according to their will. Raising a child means helping them learn to control themselves in situations that don't go their way - one can't yell at the plumber for taking a few extra hours - one starts learning that early one, slowly, slowly. At 8 months, he can sleep through the night without nursing.

He has been trained to fall asleep nursing; now he needs to be trained to fall asleep without nursing. He is older, stronger willed, more determined than at birth. But we are the adults and so it is our job to lead.

You can do it.

To wean without pain, think of lengthening the times between nursings. So if he nursed at 7am-11-3-7pm-4am, cut out one nursing - that will give 8 hours between two of the nursings. Don't nurse then for 2 days. Then, cut out another nursing, so you have another 8 hour gap. Probably best to have someone else give him his bottle and leave the house, so if he is crying you don't have to hear it. If you are going to wean him, there is not point in standing there torturing him and yourself.

I weaned my son around the same age b/c I simply could not keep-up with the pumping at work. Honestly, I think you are beating yourself up without reason. I felt like a terrible parent too, but my pediatrician reassured me that my son had benefited from the breast milk & that formulas were going to be fine.

We started slowly by replacing every-other feeding with a bottle (that my husband fed him). It was way too tempting to nurse when he would refuse the bottle, so for us it had to be my husband at the start.

You will still have wonderful bonding moments... and so will daddy! I will tell you that your little one will eat much faster from a bottle, so you will have more time to cuddle and read books which is nice too.

I can't help you with the co-sleeping. We never did it... sorry, but I don't believe in it. He will get into a new routine and so will you. Just be consistent and stop letting your guilt run the show!

Little ones usually adjust so much faster than we give them credit for. At one month I had to bottle feed my second son due to a health issue that he had. I dreaded taking away the bottle, but when I finally did he was just fine. So, try not to stress too much.

This is happening sooner than you had originally intended, but it would have to happen someday. This is your chance to decide what you'd like your new routine to be. You can bottle feed to sleep, bottle feed followed by books and rocking, maybe sing songs. Just think about what you'd like to see the routine in a couple of months, then develop a plan to gradually make that happen.

I spent many nights crying because my son had to be bottle fed. I'm so glad my husband and pediatrician reminded me that it was not my choice. Most mom's are so good at making themselves feel guilty for things completely beyond their control. Please try to let go of those negative feelings. Your really are a great mamma!

You should give yourself a break. You've given your child 8m. Which is 8m longer than my kids got from me!

The hardest part about switching to formula is finding the one that is right. All formula is the same, compare ingredients, just the price tags vary widely. My suggestion is to start with a store-brand formula like Target or Walmart, whichever you can get to easier.

Also, you'll need about 8 8oz bottles. They can be washed in the top-rack of the dishwasher. There are little racks to wash the nipples and rings. Start with a stage one or two nipple as the flow will be slower and more on demand. Formula feedings are usually every 3-4 hours give/take. During growth spurts they will be a bit closer. When mixing the formula follow the directions on the can. Try to use room temp water. Mix 1 oz more than what he is currently taking. As he eats more its easier then having to make a second bottle. Take a 'burp' break after half the bottle.

As for the night feedings, you can still co-sleep and having bonding, just you'll need to prop him up a bit more.

M.

I had to assist with the weaning process with my then 3 1/2 year old daughter when I was pregnant with baby # 3. Breastfeeding my toddler was getting increasingly uncomfortable for me, so I had to help her with the process. Of course my daughter was much older than your son, with your son it may take a bit longer but my daughter was weaned in a month. Is co sleeping something you are attached to? If not, then now is a good time to begin the transition from your bed to his bed. The idea is to eliminate the night time nursing altogether. He associates sleeping next to you with nursing, so you need to eliminate this association for him. Since baby associates mommy with breast, it might be a good idea to get your hubby to help you with this process of weaning. Can your son take a sippy cup? Although my children were exclusively breastfed (no bottles ), I did begin introducing a sippy cup at 6 months (with water or juice) so my kiddos never had a bottle. Whichever you decide to use, just make sure you don't give in to giving the breast back once you eliminate a session. Naps and bedtime do not have to be scary at all. Begin introducing "distractions" in lieu of the breast like a snack, a drink in a sippy cup or bottle, if you prefer. Make your breasts impossible to get at by wearing tops that will restrict his access to them. Just take one session away at a time, but don't eliminate breastfeeding sessions all at once. So for example, if you were to eliminate a session today, in 3-4 days, eliminate another session and keep eliminating until there is not one left. It may take time, it may not. Every baby is different but it is about creating a new routine and sticking to it.

Maybe try giving him a sippy cup that is intended for 6+ months. You could also try mixing the breast milk in with formula for a little bit in the bottle. Mixing half and half at first, and then mixing 3/4 formula with 1/4 breast milk, then finally just giving him formula. Unfortunately, I could only breastfeed for a month because my milk stopped. But, during that month I also had to supplement formula.

My daughter sleeps with me every night, ever since she was 4 months old. So, I have no suggestions on that. I have no intentions on putting her in her own bed for awhile. Some say it's wrong. But, it's my choice, and I'm the only one who has to deal with it.