Problems with Dropping Him off at Pre-k

Updated on August 17, 2008
E.K. asks from Kennesaw, GA
7 answers

I have a 4 year old that started pre-k on monday. He did fine the first day. The second and 4th day he didnt. The days he did have problems when I dropped him off were also my days off. I dont know what to do. He says he wants to stay home with me. Hes been in daycare before but its been a little over a year. I dont know if he just doesnt like his school or is just being attached right now. I am also 4 months pregnant and hes been very attached. What should I do!

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M.C.

answers from Charleston on

it will get better with time. Make sure you are spending extra quality time with him when you are together. When you drop him off, tell him when you'll be back and make sure you're back exactly when you say you will be. Also, when you leave try to stay positive--if he sees you get upset, it will worsen his sadness. Before all of this, though, make sure it isn't a problem with the school. Best of luck--kids are resilient creatures--he'll do great!

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D.H.

answers from Atlanta on

Has he voiced exactly why he doesn't want to go or just misses you? Some children just aren't ready for formal schooling at age 4. And since here in GA where Pre-K isn't mandatory, you don't have to put him in there.

It actually will be a good thing to spend that extra time with him before the baby comes and when the baby comes, so he can bond with you and the new baby. Making him a part of this big picture will create a stronger connection with less insecurities. (but of course, that is my opinion) :0)

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B.L.

answers from Atlanta on

Maybe you can have a little picture of you in his pocket to take if he gets lonely? Or a small thing from home that helps him feel secure? I'm sure its a phase though and he will out grow it. He will be fine. The best is when you go to pick them up and they say "MOMMMY!!" and are happy to see you! When you drop him off, just walk out if he starts fussing. If you give attention to it, he will just think he can act that way everyday. Also, if you try to calm him, you end up getting upset more yourself. I guarantee you he is fine 5 min after you are gone....

E.M.

answers from Atlanta on

It could be so many things or nothing at all...Maybe he realizes that in the next few homes he will have competition for your attnetion, and so forth,,,,,,,Talked to the teacher and your son Tell your son if he stays at school when you pick him up you are going to do something special together Just make sure that there is nothing wrong going at school

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A.L.

answers from Savannah on

Get a copy of the book "The Kissing Hand" by Audrey Penn and read it together. It is a great book about a little racoon's transition to school. When you drop him off, be loving, but firm that he has to go, and leave quickly. The longer you stay, the worse it gets. (As a teacher, I know this is true. As a mommy, I know how hard it is to leave your baby screaming.)

If possible, go back a few minutes after you leave and peek at him through a window. You'll most likely see that he is playing and happy. It could do you a world of good. (Just make sure he can't see you too!)Good luck, and don't worry. You'll both make it through this transition just fine.

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D.T.

answers from Atlanta on

This is completely normal. He knows that you are home on those days and wants to be home with you. Use some of the ideas other people wrote and give it time. He will need to learn that he has to go to school and staying home with you is not an option. I know it is heartbreaking to leave him when he is crying but it is necessary. I am sure he stops a few minutes after you leave. He will eventually get in the routine and stop crying when you leave, probably. Some children continue to cry once in a while all year but it does not meant that anything is wrong. Some children just have a harder time dealing with the separation.

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A.C.

answers from Atlanta on

I had this problem with my 3 year old last year at preschool and I started a reward chart for her and it worked. Granted that she would get bored with it after a while, then I just switched to a different reward. After changing the reward a few times, she didn't need it anymore. Some people don't believe in using rewards but I do and it helped.

Hope you find something that works for you and your son!

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