Please Help with Cousin's Divorce - Husband Won't Move Out

Tough situation, though she cannot legally force him out, If she leaves then it can be considered relinquishment of property which makes it more likely he will be granted the home during the settlement. She can try to move to a different room, though throughout the divorce till the settlement is made he has every right to be there no matter how hard it is on her. This is divorce..sad but true. My uncle just went through this, and didnt move till the divorce was finalized, and my mother-in-law also with her second husband, though she moved out and had to move back in in order to get the house. She got lucky though, and her third is a divorce attorney who reminds her of this regularly.

Hi E.,

Oh, I can feel her pain. Has she had a court hearing yet? In Wisconsin, where I divorced, you can file for temporary orders from the judge, including living arrangements and temporary maintenance (support), while the divorce is being worked out. Bottom line, though, is it sounds like she needs a REALLY good lawyer... s/he will know all of that. And also probably a good therapist. ;) Best wishes to her.

Unless he is abusing her or the kids, there is nothing that can be done legally to force him out of his own home. Unless.... he's not on the mortgage, which isn't very likely.

I think it's kind of a harsh reality, but if she wants out of the marriage, and wants to minimize the mental stress, her only option is to leave herself. She filed for divorce, she should have this plan in place anyway .

When I went thru my divorce, I LEFT HIM, I wanted out... I got out, and the only way he was able to bother me, was to leave me begging pleading voiemails, which he usually followed up with some of the nastiest messages I have ever heard - which actually ended up helping ME - when those messages were played for the judge, he granted my divorce without hesitation. :)

Edit note:

I wanted to add, that even when my husband verbally threatened me on voicemail and severely vandalized our car (saying things like when I was stabbing the seats I was thinking of you...) the police were completely unwilling to do ANYTHING. They told me 'there are no laws against vandalizing your own property' and 'without a restraining order we cannot do anything about him harrassing you on voicemail, even if it is threatening in nature'. It was this point I lost all faith in the police department.. and I walked out of there saying, 'well... when you find my body in a dumpster, you know who did it'. So I really wouldn't rely too much on what the police can do. Her lawyer is her best advocate thru all this.

E., my mom just went through this - there is nothing you can do legally to make him leave if his name is on the title/mortgage, unless he's abusing her and/or the children and their lives are in danger. Once my dad moved out, my mom changed the locks and the keyless entry code for the garage, but he would still come around to try and hassle her. She called the police & they & her lawyer told her the same thing - that unless he was threatening her life she couldn't do anything...if he was she could get a restraining order. Now that their divorce is settled and he signed over his rights to the house, if he is there unwanted she can call the police to have him removed from the property. That hasn't stopped him from still harassing her though - he fonud her work number through 411 & is calling her there, then he found her private work cell & is harassing her on that number as well. Her next move is to get a restraint on phone calls...GOOD LUCK!

If he's following her around all day, then it sounds like he does not have a job? Her options are going to be based on how much funding she has available.
Unless he has been abusing her or the kids, she won't find it easy to make him leave the house. It's just as much his as hers. But she is free to take the kids & move somewhere else. But that's where money plays a roll. If she doesn't have any, or not much, it'll be difficult. Is there any other family or friends in the area she can stay with? Does HE have any friends that may be willing to get involved? Call his best friend & see if he'll talk him into leaving & staying with him for a few days.
She should ask her lawyer what she can do to keep him out if he does leave. I honestly do not know if she can legally have the locks changed, etc, without having to give him a key...
The local police department man have some ideas too, without causing any additional problems. They can "talk to him" & suggest he go elsewhere. If he acts threatening while they're there, they'll take him away.
But if he's normally mild mannered, they're probably going to suggest staying in different rooms until it's over, or other arrangements can be made.
Good luck, and tell her to watch her back. Seriously. It's this type of guy that seems to snap & makes the evening news. (You know, I can't live without you, and I won't let YOU live without me.)

Starlite *

Do not move out. I moved out of my house (at my lawyer's advice!) and took my children with to a tiny apartment to wait/ I asked the lawyer next step and he said we go to court. He came and told me that i couldn't have my house and that (even though the apartment cost more than my home mortgage and we could split some assets so everything would work out) he told me I left and couldn't have it even though he told me to. So I repeat, unless he's hurting you *then you have a good reason for him to leave, do not go anywhere. Although my life worked out really well down the line a new house and all, but it was a nightmare. I am also not sure if I should mention the name of the lawyer who did that to me, but be very careful of lawyers.