I have a 17 year old son with Asperger's.... Aspie's are like any other mate. They can suck and they can be great. No, they are not going to have the same awareness of emotional needs that non-Aspies might. Some non-Aspie males are totally emotionally unaware and they don't have an excuse.
My son is very sweet and kind and funny. But he has to try to reach out to others... it's very easy for him to be wrapped up only in himself. And he has to make himself do these things... for him it is very much like learning Algebra. So your mate can do the same. His desire to make things work or not should be your clue.
The other poster has had a hard time. It's hard to say what part is Aspie and what part isn't, but I'm telling you I've read blogs and articles of people who are Aspie's and they can and do have successful, happy relationships.
Just be logical with him. Tell him if he likes having you around then he needs to 1. go to counselling and 2. do the homework from the counsellor at home too.
It may seem unromantic to tell him that he must ask you four times a week to sit down and ask you about your day, your feelings etc and spend at least 30 minutes "listening" to you. But if he agrees and does it, I can't think of anything MORE romantic and fulfilling. To know that someone would go to that effort for you, when it is very hard for them to do because they care about you would be so sexy.
Again, he's like any other guy in many respects. He may be a jerk or not. He may be your soulmate or not.
I don't know if she takes Aspie adult counselling but Dr. Denise Wooten in Lewisville works with many Aspies and she's wonderful. You might give her a call and if she can't help you, I'm sure she could refer you to someone that could.
Tell her T. from Flower Mound referred you.... she gets really busy and sometimes she's not taking new patients but if you drop my name, it might help.
Good luck to you!