my 2 1/2 yr old daughter wanted to start going potty on her own about 3 weeks ago. She is doing well going number 1 and has been in underwear for the past week (with a few little accidents here and there). However, she has yet to go number 2 in the toilet. she will just go in her underwear and then tell me she has poopy. My mom said I should just put her back in diapers or pullups, but I don't want to give up on her yet and I don't want to go backwards (and I don't want to spend the money). she is very smart and independent and wants to do everything her older brother does (he'll be 6 yrs old next month). suggestions? is she just not ready and needs to go back to diapers/pullups? or should I give her a little more time? any tricks I can try? I'm hoping once she goes number 2 in the toilet the first time, she'll be able to keep it going.
thanks so much!!!
Thank you everyone for taking time to respond! I will not go back to diapers/pull-ups. I'm going to give her more time and continue to talk to her about where to go potty. I do clean her up in the bathroom, she watches me put the poop in the toilet, and she flushes it herself. She gets a "treat" (small piece of chocolate) every time she goes #1 on the potty and I offered her a bigger treat for going #2 but she doesn't seem to want to do it. I have noticed a few times where she had that look and I asked her if she would go sit on the potty to let the poop out and she would just say no and run away. I have even hugged her while she's on the toilet and told her it's ok to let the poopy out after she has finished going #1. I'm not sure if she's afraid, and if she is, of what. But I will try to coax her by telling her if she goes poopy, I will take her out for ice cream, so we'll see if that works!
Don't put her back in pull ups/diapers...you've made it this far. As a motivator I bought pink toilet paper at stop and shop!!! ANd it worked like a charm! It was just for her and it was her special roll and she could only use it when she went in the potty. I have b/g twins so they each had their own color and loved it! Hope this works. Sounds like shes doing great!
Dont put her back in them. I think you should say if u go poopy in the tiolet i can take u too...... her favorite place or if u go poopy u get a cookie
is she scared to go in the potty? My daughter was for some reason when we visited my grandparents for 5 days. She kept saying "i dont poop at grandma's house". Finally, I went poop in front of her, and that seemed to do the trick, because then she wanted to poop in the potty like mommy. Maybe if you did it in front of her that would help. I hated doing it, as I'm pretty private in the bathroom, but it really worked for my daughter. Good luck!!
Don't go backwards.
That's just my opinion.
If she fills her underpants, take her into the bathroom, help her take her undies off, have her help put the yucky in the toilet, sit her on the toilet to "make sure she's done", then wipe her off and flush it bye bye.
She will get the hang of where it goes if you do this.
Also, do you have it pretty well timed as to when she goes?
Set her on the toilet or potty chair and make her stay there.
I don't mean be cruel about it, but read a book with her, talk to her about butterflies....whatever, get her in the habit of sitting on the potty and if she has an accident, take her to the bathroom and make her watch you dump out her underpants than sit her on the potty and flush.
She'll get the hang of it.
Best wishes.
Most kids her age are regular in their bowel movements and some also hide when they have to make. So I would try to figure out when your DD usually goes and then watch her for any signs. Dont stare at her, but just observe her. When she gets a strained or far off look about her walk her calmly to the potty and have her sit. Then read her a story or better yet clean the sink, mirror. In other words be near her, making sure she is sitting, but dont watch her or make it seem as if you are waiting for something. Scrub the mirror and even hum a little or talk about something silly to yourself. Also when she does make in the potty be careful of her reaction when you flush it in the big toilet. Some kids get upset to see their handiwork go swirling down the drain while others are thrilled by it. If she gets upset then flush after she has left the room.
Do not put her back in pullups or diapers!
Get a copy of "Everybody Poops."
And once she goes in the potty once, she will be trained. My daughter only had one accident after she finally let herself poop in the potty. I read her Everybody poops, and I bribed her with special undies and Dora gummies. (I had my daughter in trainers until she pooped in the potty).
Just keep saying "poop goes in the potty."
Hi M.
My guess is that you have not simply showed her by taking the underwear into the bathroom and dumping it in, then talking to her about how much easier and cleaner it is to just go in the potty. Then being diligent about cleaning her up with washcloth and all. Then say if you go in the potty all you need to do is wipe and you could be off playing. Oh it worked like a charm with the one I had trouble with. The person who told me I thought was nuts, so if you think I am that is AOK, but it worked like a charm and I had no more trouble. She didn't want me to wash her, put her in the tub or anything else to cause her to miss play time. Oh yes we missed about 20 minutes which ran right into nap time that particular day, and I milked that for all it was worth as well.
No I doubt you need to go back to diapers. I really think it would set the rest back as well. Just an opinion
I don't think you should put her back in diapers nor pull ups. I believe that it can cause them to go backwards. What I did with two of my boys, the oldest and the youngest: My oldest did it and it went on the floor and I said, "oh, look at that poopy, that is yucky and that belongs in the potty." He was going to pick it up and I said, "no, no. Mommy will put it in the toilet and come with me" and we went to the bathroom and put the poop in the potty. I didn't want to confuse him. He was going in the potty and flushing it down the toilet he's not going to understand to do it in the potty. So, the next day I saw the expression on his face and I said "No, not yet." I quickly picked him up and put him on the potty and I said, "Go ahead, push the poopy out." and he did!! I praised him and praised him and I said to him, "that's where it goes" and it looked like a light bulb turned on for him. And he did it ever since. My youngest, it took a while but to be honest I don't know how I got him to do that. It was almost like it was in his nature to do it in the potty. My second son, he basically taught himself because he was watching his brother, who is only a year and 3 weeks older doing it and he copied and got praised too. I praised them and the more I did and they liked it the more they kept doing what they should be doing. It'll happen, that is the second thing that comes after number 1 happens in the potty. Let us know what worked with her....I'll be curious. Every child is different and knowing what worked for them makes me more pleased how different each child is and how unique they all are. May God Almighty bless you and your little one.
If you know when she is more likely to have a BM then you can watch extra careful for times she squats and grunts and then you can ask her if she needs to go. Just like with a puppy, you want to catch her in the act and scoop her up and get her to where she needs to go. The nice thing is that it is more obvious with a bowel movement:) And naturally you would praise her lavishly when she finishes in the potty so she will know going there is something to be proud of... But make a big deal about how important it is to let mommy know when she needs to go, "so mommy can tell you how proud she is of you!"
Give it some more time.
Dear M., It is so good that she wanted to do this on her own. Number 2 does take longer. I also do not think you should put her back in diapers. Ask her to tell you when she has to go (she may not be ready for this yet) or make a note of when she goes: after lunch? mid morning? and try to get her on the potty at those times. When she does go #2 in her pants, bring her to bathroom and put the BM in toilet and say "this is where it goes" we would all wave goodby to the poopy! Good luck, it is not easy:-) Grandma Mary
Updated
Dear M., It is so good that she wanted to do this on her own. Number 2 does take longer. I also do not think you should put her back in diapers. Ask her to tell you when she has to go (she may not be ready for this yet) or make a note of when she goes: after lunch? mid morning? and try to get her on the potty at those times. When she does go #2 in her pants, bring her to bathroom and put the BM in toilet and say "this is where it goes" we would all wave goodby to the poopy! Good luck, it is not easy:-) Grandma Mary
#2 is a lot harder for many kids. I think sometimes they simply don't know how to go from doing it whenever/wherever/in whatever position, to going at a set time and sitting on a potty (which is often a different position than they have been using). What helped for my son (who was pee-trained for months before being poop-trained) was to break it into stages. 1st stage was to poop in the bathroom, wearing diapers (he was in undies, at this point, but I'd put a diaper on him when he needed to poop) and in whatever position he wanted (which was standing, for him). Next stage was he had to sit (still wearing a diaper). I let him choose what to sit on, and he chose the floor. Next stage was to sit on the potty (still in the diaper). Last was on the potty, without a diaper. We did each stage until I could tell he was comfortable, but for at least 3 days. And, once he went successfully in the potty once, he never stopped. He also never had a poop accident in his undies once we started the stages. The key was making it easier for him, because he was very motivated as soon as he felt he could succeed. Good luck!
She sounds ready. I potty trained my daughter at the same age. I put her straight into panties--just used diapers at night for the first 7-10 days. She had been staying dry at night pretty consistently for a few months.
HOWEVER, my daughter wasn't entirely compliant. She knew what to do, knew when to do it AND where...she just wouldn't. I had sworn that I wouldn't bribe her with candy, but that is what worked.
I kept screw-top jars of jelly beans, marshmallows, and m&ms near the bathroom. She got her choice of a couple of jelly beans or marshmallows for peeing and a couple of m&ms for pooping. No treats for trying...only for doing. It worked almost immediately. Keep in mind that, up to this point, we were a practically candy-free household. It was a new and exciting treat for her.
She was using the toilet for all functions inside of two weeks...accident free. Since she trained last AUG/SEP, I can count on one hand the number of times she's wet the bed at night. The jars were never very full, but when they were empty that was the end of it.
This method doesn't work for everyone and not everyone agrees, but you really just have to find your child's motivation. There is really no difference in rewarding them with a sticker, candy, or new toy...it is all still bribery.
It was funny when instead of telling me she needed to poop, she would say, "I want chocolate!"
Hi There,
My daughter was completetely pee trained with no accidents 2 mos before her 3rd birthday. However, she was not poo trained for almost 6 mos. after that. I actually have heard that this is pretty common. The worst thing you can do is try to force the issue or throw them on the potty when they are pooping (if they are resistant). Some kids are afraid of "losing part of themselves" into the potty, for others it is a control issue. If they start holding it, then it hurts to go and it becomes a pattern of not pooping. For us, we told my daughter that she could ask for a diaper to poop in, but she had to go in the bathroom to do it because that's where big kids poop. She always asked for a diaper or tended to go early in the morning while she was still in a night time diaper (so I knew she had the physical control). It finally occured to me to put a potty seat in her room with a towel under it and tell her that if she had to poop in the morning she could do it by herself and call me when she needed help. Sure enough the next morning she did it!! She did all her poop in the potty since then. I think that some kids just need to make the decision themselves. We had been through a lot that year and I think for her it was about control. Whatever the reason, I wouldn't give up on her yet. Try to see if you can atleast get her to ask for a pull up or diaper when she is pooping and let her do it in the bathroom so she atleast starts to get the idea. Good Luck!
