Not Sleeping Through the Night...

Updated on July 27, 2009
S.L. asks from Sun Prairie, WI
10 answers

My (soon to be) 4 month old will not sleep for more than 2 hours at a time during the night. I've tried to give him the pacifier, pat him on the stomach, and even let him cry for a little bit until I KNOW he's hungry. My biggest concern is that he's truly hungry when he wakes because he eats a lot on both sides! He has no problem putting himself to sleep during the day or at all during the night...he just wants to eat! I go into see the pediatrician in a few weeks but I'd like some advice asap...I haven't slept in SO long! Thanks :)

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So What Happened?

Hello everyone. I just wanted to say that, since my posting, I've discovered a trick for longer sleeping. One night, we were wating for gramma to arrive from Montana and it was getting quite late. I used to put him down between 6 and 7 at night but that night, he didn't get into his crib unitl 8:30. He slept for 6 straight hours, then slept for 3, then antoher 3, then he was up for the day. Ever since then, I've been keeping him up until 8 or 9 and he always sleeps for 6 hours straight. This also helps me because I hit the hay right after he does! Hope this helps those of you who are experiencing the same thing.

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C.O.

answers from Minneapolis on

My first didn't sleep thru the night till almost 2 (she woke once a night for a diaper change and went back to bed) and my second just started sleeping thru the night at 10 months. Some kids just aren't big sleepers. My second was truly hungry when she awoke at night so I fed her and she went right back to sleep. Funny thing.. you will never sleep the same way you slept before having kids.. its just part of being a mommy. Enjoy it... it goes so fast!

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C.N.

answers from Milwaukee on

My 15 month old still night nurses, but a 4 month old especially needs those nutrients and there is no way I would let me nursing 4 month old cry for 30 minutes at a time, he doesn't know better all he knows is that he is hungry and according to la leche league, kelly mom, world health organization, and the AAP and nursing baby should be fed on demand when they are hungry regardless of time of day. Just my two cents though.

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J.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

S.,

He's growing fast, and really probably is hungry. My boys were both like that. My daughter sleeps longer (at least she did at that age). If he's not falling straight back to sleep as soon as he latches, and is actually eating on both sides, I'd just keep feeding him at night. You could try feeding him more often during the day (if he goes more than 2 hours - try feeding every 2 hours) and see if you can get more calories in him so he might sleep longer at night.

Good luck, and know that really in hindsight, it won't seem like very long at all that you were sleep deprived. When he's 18 months and sleeping regular hours, you will feel like he was just a tiny baby and might even miss a midnight feeding :)

Good luck, and try to rest during the day if you can.

Jessica

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R.P.

answers from St. Cloud on

Just let him eat; He's still very very very young! He can't help it that he feels hungriest at a time that isn't the most convenient. DO try getting him to eat more before you go to bed. 4 months old is stil too young to worry about his sleeping habits. I'd try not to worry about it until he's closer to 9 months. (who knows, he may start sleeping through the night next week!) Try to rest as often as YOU can- I can related with sleep depravation and it stinks! You can try Korean Ginseng and even 1 cup of coffee a day for you, it is safe for you and baby both and will help give you extra energy.

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L.B.

answers from Des Moines on

Waking frequently at night is very typical for a four-month-old infant. I recommend that you read Dr. Paul Fleiss's book Sweet Dreams, which has a lot of information about healthy sleep patterns for babies and children.

The Sears Nighttime Parenting book is also good.

In my experience, it's better not to look at the clock and keep track of every time your baby wakes up. That just psyches you out for the next day.

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E.I.

answers from Duluth on

typical baby behavior. hes having a growth spurt. baby's tummies are about the size of their fists. they triple their weight and double their height in the first year; hopefully the ONLY time in their lives they grow that much. all that growing leads to waking a lot wanting to eat. when i doubt, dont cry it out, just feed! :D its easier for baby to determine needs from wants when his needs are consistently fulfilled right away! :D

www.askdrsears.com has some good info about babies and sleep. please check it out! :D if you are nursing, find a local or nearby la leche league, they will be able to provide you TONS of support in all things about babies!

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C.H.

answers from Des Moines on

My son was like that - at that age we started giving him a little cereal in a bottle (you have to then get the right nipple) mixed with formula before bed. Worked like a charm. He was a hungry boy and this really helped him!

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M.C.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi, I've never posted on anything like this before - so hopefully it goes through! :)
First off, congrats on your new baby!

So, if the baby is genuinely waking up out of hunger - there are a few things that I think it could be:
First, you might want to try to assess if you have a satisfactory milk supply. If you are nursing as often as you say you are - you probably DO have a sufficient supply. However, you did not say if you supplement with formula or if the baby has been gaining enough weight, etc... etc...etc... But I will just assume that you do have a sufficient milk supply. Some thing to bring up, though.
Or second, and most likely the reason he nurses so much, is that you have a "small storage capacity". ***This is not a bad thing and it does not mean that you can not successfully breast feed your baby or meet your baby's needs***. You CAN meet your babies needs, and that is important to remember.
Most women do not understand how the breast actually works - a great book is: Breast Feeding Made Simple (ch. 6). I will try and explain how your "storage capacity" effects how often your baby nurses.
Your "breast storage capacity" simple refers to the amount of milk you can hold in your breasts. It is NOT related to breast size. Breast size is determined by the amount of fatty tissue in the breasts. This means that smaller-breasted mothers that have more room in their glandular tissue can still have a large storage capacity and hold large amounts of milk comfortably. THE KEY WORD IS: COMFORTABLY.
Mothers with large storage capacities report that their babies almost ALWAYS take ONE breast at a feeding. This is because the baby always gets enough milk from one breast to satisfy him. A large storage capacity can also have a major effect on the number of feedings per day. A baby's total daily milk intake remains remarkably stable from one to six months of age. At around one month, a breastfed baby reaches his peak daily milk intake of about 25-35 ounces of milk per day, and this stays roughly the same until he begins solid foods at six months and his need for milk decreases as his solids intake increases.
At one month, the average baby's stomach comfortably holds about 4 ounces of milk, so to get enough milk during the course of the day, he needs to breast feed on average about 8 times. (8 feedings x 4 oz = 32 oz/day).
A mother with a large storage capacity has more than 4 ounces available at each feeding, and as he baby grows, he may begin to take more milk, say 5 or 6 ounces, at a feeding. Since the amount of milk he needs in a day stays the same, if he increases his milk intake at feedings, his number of feedings per day will go down. In other words, the baby who previously needed to breast feed eight times per day to get 25-35 oz, now needs to feed only 6 times a day to get the same amount of milk.
The mother with a large storage capacity can go longer between feedings and let her breasts fill up more between feedings with out her milk drying up - because her breasts can hold more milk with out it feeling uncomfortable. So, the milk supply does not suffer due to the reduced number of feedings. Also, remember, everyone's milk supply ebbs and flows over the course of the day, so a baby will not always take the same amount of milk at every feeding. But hopefully this example clarifies this idea.
Taking more milk per feeding may also affect a baby's need to wake at night to feed. The baby who needs fewer feedings per day tends to sleep thought the night at an earlier age that other babies. Yet even with longer stretches between feedings at night, a mother with a large storage capacity may not become uncomfortably full by morning since her breasts comfortably hold more milk. This means she can maintain her milk supply in spite of these longer stretches.
Now lets look at a the other side of the coin. The most important point to remember is that women with a small storage capacity produce plenty of milk for their babies. Researchers noted that none of the women in their studies with a small storage capacity had a problem with low milk supply or slow weight gain in their babies; their babies were thriving. But these mother-baby pairs had a different feeding rhythm.
If the baby of a mother with an average storage capacity takes one breast at some feedings and both breasts at some feedings, what is typical for a mother with a small storage capacity? In general, these babies want both breasts at almost every feeding, especially by one month of age or so, when they can take more milk.
Lets say a mother with a small storage capacity can comfortably hold 2 oz in each breast. At one month, her baby needs to breast feed eith or nine times per day to get the 25-35 ox per day he needs (2 breasts X 2 oz X eight feedings = 32 oz per day). What is different, however, is that during months one through six, his milk intake per feeding will NOT change. Unlike the pair in which the mother has a large storage capacity, this mother's breasts hold 2 ounces apiece. So, no matter how big the baby's stomach gets, he will get no more than 4 oz per feeding.
A baby continues to need 25-35 oz per day. He can take a maximum of 4 oz per feeding. What will happen if his mother attempts to drop some feedings as he grows? (This is sometimes recommended on the premise that older babies don't "need" as many breastfeedings). Dropping feedings affects this baby in two ways:
1. The baby's overall milk intake per day goes down, because it is impossible for the baby to take more milk at each feeding to make up for the dropped feedings.
2. The mother's milk supply decreases.

With fewer feedings the baby's weight gain will likely slow or stop, he may even lose weight. A baby in this situation is underfed, which means he'll probably also be understandably fussy and unhappy. His sleep may suffer, as well.
The mother with a small storage capacity is also at risk for a decreased milk supply. Why? when a mother drops a feeding, this means the intervals between feedings increase. Remember, full breasts make milk slowly and drained breasts make milk quickly. (for more info on this buy the book - very interesting!!). A mother who's breasts can comfortably hold 2 oz will feel full very quickly in comparison with the mother whose breasts can comfortably hold 5 oz.
If she decides it's time to train her baby to sleep through the night and subsequently goes 7 or 8 hrs between feedings, her breasts will become hard and full after 4 or 5 hrs, not only does that put her at risk for mastitis, but her full breasts will mkae milk slowly, She gives her body the signal to slow down her milk production.
As long as a mother with a small storage capacity continues to feed her baby when the baby shows hunger cues and continues feeding enough times per day, her milk supply will be fine. (The exact number of feedings needed will vary according to individul storage capacity.) But if she stretches out the time between feedings or drops them to the point that her breasts feel full, her body will respond by producing less milk.

**** The mother with a small storage capacity is the mother whose baby continues to wake and breastfeed every few hours during the night. Continued night feedings are normal for this mother and baby. The baby needs them to get enough milk and the mother needs them to keep up her milk supply. If this mother has a breastfeeding goal of twelve months, she needs to plan to continue night feedings.

If you buy this book - you can get some great ideas on breastfeeding while lying down and co-sleeping. (pages 109-115).

I highly recommend having your baby in bed with you!! There are ways to do this safely. If you can manage to sleep with the baby there - it is the ideal arrangement for you to get your rest. Mother's sleeping away from their babies is a relatively new idea in the history of the world. Many mother's are nervous about suffocating their baby - however, if you take the proper precautions it is usually not something to worry about.

Good luck to you!! It just sounds like your baby is doing exactly what he needs to do to get enough milk and keep your supply going strong!! Continued night feedings is most likely your norm.

if you have any questions/comments here is my email address:
____@____.com

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K.L.

answers from Madison on

I know how you feel. I was up every 1 1/2 - 2 hous in the night for the first year. One 3 hour stretch when my son first went to sleep. He was definitely eating (up to about 9 months then it was comfort and habit) when he woke. Trust your gut and you will get to sleep, eventually. If your partner can help with a feeding that can help with sleep. Didn't work for our family but I know folks who shared.

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C.D.

answers from La Crosse on

Just don't let him cry, this is never a good idea for so many reasons including the risk of SIDS and problems with attachment between you two. Attachment is so very important for them in their first year. I know it is awful not getting as much sleep as you are used to, but I have survived painful and long-lasting sleep deprivation and my daughter is a better sleeper because of it. It is horrible when you are not getting your share of sleep, I know it. Good luck, and why not take him to a chiropractor for an adjustment while you're at it? He might have a problem with his digestion too. I hope you get some good sleep soon but you probably won't...but I know a year from now things will be much easier for you.

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