Not Married, Boyfriend Is Cheating, Wants to End relationship.....and Take Son!!

Oh my gosh my heart goes out to you....I understand where you are at in life.....My second husband was a cheat....Once a cheat always a cheat, believe me....I stayed in that marriage because of the five children....and I couldn't do it on my own....It was a miserable existance.....I wouldn't do it again....I would of left....If you are a good mother, how could he take your child away???? The courts like to side with the mother.......If you think he has only cheated a few times...think again......You are much better off without him....You deserve a good life with someone that will love you and only you......My husband died at 54 years old....massive heart attack.....Today I am thankful for this..Today I have a very wonderful life without him...The kids are doing better now that he is gone....The main problem I have today.....I just can't do a relationship with a man....I don't trust men at all....My husband is the reason for me being like this......Honestly I like my freedom today....I don't feel caged, drained, or always upset......Today I do have peace in my life......finally.....I wouldn't of wished my life on my worst enemy......trust me.....I thought I loved him too.....In our last conversation together, I told him, I was in love with a man that I flat out couldn't stand.....Today I realize it wasn't love at all.....A man would not do those things if he truly loved you.....We all tend to want what we can't have.....I don't know why this is so true....but it is....Get a lawyer.....If you are on a fixed income....He should pay for your lawyer.....or find a lawyer that will do it pro bono....Usually you can find one at the courthouse....Go early in the morning and there are lawyers there that will help you out....Don't stay with him.....It will never change...only get worse.....I went through 21 years of this....The last four years were simply horrible....He was bringing the women home, sleeping with them in my bed.....I slept on the couch the last two years....I also started to drink at night to cope....Now I am in AA.....I wasn't a drinker at all prior to this.....I needed to self medicate to cope with my life....Sad to say my youngest son is a lot like him.....If I had only left I know in my heart....he wouldn't of become like his father.....Now I feel guilty for not leaving when I found out......No matter what...It is never good to stay in that kind of relationship....My husband was always searching for happiness in all the wrong places....He never did become truly happy...It is about him...and his problem....Not about you....Don't take on his problem.....You or nothing else will make him happy....trust me......

GET A LAWYER, NOW!!!!
Good luck, E.M.

Duh!!!! he only wants custody so he does not have to pay child support.
Just leave him you are not married and if he does not file for custody you win and have the kid if he does then get a lawyer and get your kid. The courts side with the mother besides you can be a stay at home mom and what judge would not like that. Just because you are on disability does not mean you are a bad mother. Itr means you have something wrong with you and you cant work.
Just leave and then get child support from him to help pay for stuff.
Like the PPl said once a cheater allways a cheater so leave and make a life for you and your child.

Call social services & ask for help!! They have people who can give you the phone ##s of the different agencies that handle these issues. Are you on WIC? If not, call them, too & start that & ask them if there are any mother's groups that they know of close to your home.

Also, look up the Parks & Recreations catalog for Parenting Classes...you are the "student", but it is a pre-school setting, where you meet other moms & kids the same age as yours & learn about parenting your child & do crafts, sing songs & learn about age appropriate behaviour for your son. I think that if you look up the Sweetwater Union Adult school, they might have them, also. It's a great resource for networking, also. I know that Chula Vista has several "Mommy & Me" classes around at the various elementary schools, I'm not too sure about IB, but I think that on Palm Ave, down by the beach, there is an Adult school that I read had some parenting classes. They start with infants, there should be one for you & your boy.

You could take the bus to the classes, they are generally a couple of mornings a week from 9 to 12 or so. They are well worth the effort, you could make friends & your boy could also. You would also be showing the court that YOU are an involved, educated parent who is trying to do what is BEST for your child.

Hang in there, you should just keep your eyes on the end goal, a heathly life for you & your boy, it's hard to see that from where you are, but just start slowly & make 1 change at a time, & you should get there...Good Luck!!

You took care of the kids the kid yours they came from your body. Manage a job you got the kids. Have a place for them to stay and Divorce the abuser. Get record of all the thing he did to you and Seek a lawyer. Jame Byrnes is my lawyer in downtown in 5th Avenue great lawyer.

I know you are hurt I am going through it myself I am tried of betrayal.

Take your kid to a safe place first and seek an attorney. NOW!!!!!

Get help through the gov't for the mean time so that your kids are safe.

Don't let him get any of the medical record your find.

Girl Power is all you need... I am in a similar situation I hope you go get counselor for your insanity.

Get a Private Investigator after him....So you will win 100%

Get a lawyer, go to counseling and fix yourself. You have allowed yourself to become pitiful. I know, I have been there. No one is going to feel sorry for you or want to help you if you are self destructive. You are teaching your son to act just like his father and find a women just like you. Do you really want that?? GET A LAWYER and stop being pitiful. That is a sure way to lose. Get counseling, NOW. I am not saying this to be mean to you, as I said, I have been there. My boys went to live with dad because I knew I would lose and I have regretted it all my life. After he died it took a while to rebuild the relationship with them. Take your eyes off yourself and focus on your child. Show him the way to live. Good luck, it will be hard.