Nights/days Mixed Up

Updated on September 27, 2008
T.M. asks from Amarillo, TX
49 answers

Baby boy is 4 days old. He is up all night and sleeps for hours at a time during the day. HELP!!! How do I get him on a schedule?

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S.H.

answers from Dallas on

Yes, get him a Miracle Blanket! www.MiracleBlanket.com

It TRULY is a miracle and will definitely help with his sleep patterns. It's guaranteed to help too!

Congratulations!

1 mom found this helpful
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J.B.

answers from Dallas on

Most babies enter the world that way. Keep a consistent feeding schedule. They usually grow out of it.

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D.S.

answers from Dallas on

Don't stress too much now, he's brand new, things will sort out eventually. Feed him when he's hungry, let him sleep when he's tired. It's what newborns are supposed to do :-)

Stay away from babywise, scary stuff.
http://www.ezzo.info/

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M.S.

answers from Dallas on

Hi T.,

Please, please, please, do not use the book Babywise. Even the American Association of Pediatricians discourages using this method, as it limits feeding for very young babies, who need to eat when they are hungry, not when a clock has certain numbers on it.

A great book with common sense is Dr. Sear's The Baby Book. It is readily available at amazon, Barnes and Noble. He is a pediatrician and a great comfort. Visit his website at http://askdrsears.com/

It is completely normal for a 4 day old to be mixed up about day and night. Please do not worry about getting him on your schedule so soon. Try to see what his schedule is for a while.

You will get through, just with less sleep. You're doing great, mom!

Peace and Joy,
M.
www.yogapotential.com

1 mom found this helpful
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M.K.

answers from Dallas on

Its okay! Calm down! Sleep when he sleeps so you can get your rest. My daughter was just like this and it took about a month to finally get her to a schedule I liked. It takes time and patience. I would try to wake her during the day, but she wouldn't budge. Try to keep him awake a little bit longer or let him sleep a little bit longer each day and slowly he will get on your schedule. Infants don't know what is day and when is night they sleep when they feel like it. Try to keep him entertained and active during the day so when night comes he will be more willing to sleep. And if he wakes up at night keep the rooms dim and quiet.

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S.L.

answers from Dallas on

Keep him on schedule like you already are, but put him near sunlight (open the blinds all the way) for day naps and darkness at night...soon his biological clock will work its way out.

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J.H.

answers from Dallas on

Wow - I'm surprised every time I see that people recommend keeping a tiny baby up when they want and need to sleep. Like others have said, it's normal for a 4 day old to not have a schedule and to not know the difference between night and day. Babies this young tend to have a 1 to 2 hour cycle where they sleep for an hour to 2 hours, wake to eat, have about 60 minutes of wakefullness, then back to sleep. Let your baby guide you in what to do - if he wants to sleep, let him sleep. What worked best for me was to bring my daughter to bed with me (yep, I'm one of those crazy co-sleepers!). She slept much better when she was near me and slept longer when I was asleep too.

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S.J.

answers from Dallas on

I recommend Baby Whisperer and Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child. both are lifesavers and great books to help you to get your baby on a routine.

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M.D.

answers from Dallas on

Read BabyWise. It helped me a lot.

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H.P.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter was on a normal schedule by 1 week old. Make sure during the day you are not putting them in the crib. I brought out a basinet and kept her in that all day when she slept. I also did not keep it quiet al all. I always had the tv or radio on during the day. I did not put her back in her crib until 9-11pm. She started sleeping through the night by 6 wks. Not every newborn is yje same but this seems to help train them to a better schedule. The first week is the hardest. It will get better.

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R.S.

answers from Abilene on

I feel your pain, as I am sure many others do as well. What worked for me is just not letting them sleep for that one or two hours during the day at first, then gradually keeping them awake more during the day by bathing them, rubbing them, just anything but that warm milk that seems to sedate them! :P

By night time, they were be so tired, they gladly went to sleep. It will take a bit, and some patience, but I wish you good luck!

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M.D.

answers from Dallas on

Try putting him on a eat, wake, sleep schedule during the day. See if you can get him to stay awake for 15-20 minutes after he eats. If you are interested in developing a good routine read On Becoming Babywise. I am doing Babywise and my 10 week old sleeps 10 hours a night!

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C.C.

answers from Dallas on

It will be several weeks before you get any semblance of a schedule going. Your little one was in a dark womb for 9 months and doesn't have a clue what "day" and "night" is. All you can do is patiently work on getting him to stay awake a little more during the day (which is not easy!) If he falls asleep during/after eating, try to wake him up a little earler for the next feeding. At that age, usually just unswaddling him will make him uncomfortable enough to wake up, but you might also try giving the bottom of his foot or under his chin a tickle or slight pinch (nothing painful!). But again, this will be a gradual process. I also suggest you read the book "What to Expect When Your Expecting". It has loads of practical advice from newborn to 12 months . . . it was a lifesaver for me! Good luck!

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A.K.

answers from Dallas on

Hi T. - What worked for us was making daytime as active & bright as possible by keeping lights on, a radio, talking to the baby & just generally trying to keep him/her awake as long as possible during the day. Then, when nighttime came, keeping everything as low-key as possible by turning down lights, not talking when changing/feeding the baby at night - basically just communicating through outside cues that day is for awake & night is for quiet/sleep. They usually pick it up in a week or so! Good luck!

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M.J.

answers from Abilene on

O.M.GOSH...first of all you need to try and relax because a baby needs tons of time to adjust to just being born!! You don't even need to try to get your little boy on a schedule and probably won't even be able to for several months.I know it is hard for you because you must be exhausted but you need to know this is just part of being a new mother!!!!Get some night-time help if possible.
HANG IN THERE GIRL AND ENJOY THESE DAYS WHILE YOU CAN!!!!! They will soon pass you by!

Mom of 2 -M.

Feel free to e-mail me if you ____@____.com

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J.M.

answers from Dallas on

T.:

Babies are born mixed up; in the womb they sleep all day as you walk around rocking them to sleep, then are awake all night when you lie still and let them wake up! Your baby will get switched over soon enough, within the next couple of weeks. for now, getting outside in the morning and exposing him to sunlight (carefully covered against sunburn) will help re-set his circadian rhythms. Try going for a short walk every morning around the same time, to help him with this. Good luck!

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J.D.

answers from Dallas on

The book Baby Wise fixed it for us. J.

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M.V.

answers from Dallas on

The BEST way is to read the book babywise and follow the steps. It really does work. I have three children and one on the way and I put all three on this schudule. All of my babies were sleeping through the night by eight weeks. I would get started as soon as possible. You need your sleep at night in order to be a good mommy during the day. Good luck and congratulations on your little bundle of joy. They grow up way to quick so enjoy every minute of it!!!!!
M. V.

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C.H.

answers from Dallas on

awww he's only 4 days old. Try and relax and let it be. He will get on a decent schedule soon. You are not going to sleep for at least 2 months lol sorry about that but they are worth it!

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C.R.

answers from Dallas on

Welcome to Parenthood! He will work his way out of this, but all babies go through it. It is best to keep things very bright and even with some noise during the day, and keep things dark and quiet at night. This will help guide him to a more friendly schedule, though it may take a while. Those little one don't understand night/day yet.

Good luck & congrats!!

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T.S.

answers from Dallas on

try letting him sleep during the day and stay up during the night if it is not to hard for you

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A.G.

answers from Dallas on

T.,

I hate to say this... Some people are lucky and some aren't. You might as well except the fact that your days of getting sleep are over! lol Your baby is so young...that is very normal. There is no getting a four day old baby on a sleeping schedule hun... TRUST ME... I still don't sleep every night and my youngest will be 1 next month. Good Luck.

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G.F.

answers from Dallas on

Congratulations on your new baby!

The best thing to do is to feed your baby every 2-3 hours during the day. You should wake your baby to feed him, even if he is sleeping. Sometimes, this is very difficult to keep them a wake to feed them, but keep trying. As he gets a few days older, he will do better. During the night you will let your baby sleep as long as he will. Then you will feed your baby when he wakes.

I recommend the book, Babywise. It really helps you get your babies on a great schedule. I have 4 children and used this technique with all of them, and it worked like a charm.

Good luck and remember to try to nap some while your baby is sleeping.

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P.A.

answers from Dallas on

Giving a bath just before bed time worked well for us. Babies are tired and seem to sleep well after the bath.

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K.E.

answers from Dallas on

At four days old that's normal they are all up a whole lot at night and being so young still they sleep a ton during the day I would suggest you take naps during the day when he does because I think it's his age not that he has days and nights mixed up. Good luck!

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K.S.

answers from Dallas on

Pick up the book Baby Wise...it will answer your question completely.

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C.J.

answers from Dallas on

Take a look at the book On Becoming Babywise-it has some really good plans for helping an infant learn to sleep at night and nap properly during the day.
Hang in there-this too shall pass!

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S.T.

answers from Dallas on

I've had 5 children and even though they are all different, newborns have many similarities. Don't stress, enjoy his awake time and definitely take naps when he sleeps . You can't force him to change his time-table but as he gets older he will begin to sleep more at night. If you don't rest when he does, you will be even more exhausted than you probably are now. Don't tip-toe around during the day when he is sleeping. I ran the vacuum, t.v. or radio with all of mine when they selpt. It kept them from waking suddenly when they heard a noise.

Most of all - try to enjoy this time with your new baby and get some rest every chance you can! This is not the time to worry about cleaning house or laundry.

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L.R.

answers from Dallas on

I highly suggest the book "Baby Wise." It's focus is on how to schedule your baby so that they feel secure and so that your life is as predictable as possible.

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T.U.

answers from Dallas on

I know what you mean, my baby is 5 weeks old and is just getting on a good schedule. Give yourself and your baby some time to get adjusted and sorry to say, just realize you will not be getting a lot of sleep in the next couple of months... sorry!
One common thing I read in books that really helped me was to get a routine at bedtime - my husband bathes and massages our son and then I feed him as we talk in low voices. It helps signal that it is bedtime, something totally different than our naptime routine. I also don't let him sleep more than two hours in a row during the day, I go in and gently wake him up and feed and play with him. Also, keep your daytime bright - open your windows and let the sun in, make noises even during his nap. Then at night time keep it dim and when he wakes up to feed just simply feed him and maybe change him and put him right back to sleep. It takes a while for them to catch on but my son is sleeping about 4 1/2 hours in one stretch at night and sometimes two stretches so I think it is slowly working its magic! Good luck!

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L.

answers from Dallas on

Don't worry, it is totally normal. Just set a schedule and set him down when you would eventually like him to sleep. Give it 6-8 weeks, hang in there!

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E.C.

answers from Dallas on

T.- This will take time but one of the best things I found with my newborn is to have her in the living room with the tv on and the blinds open with her in direct contact with the sunlight. Also after feedins during the day try to keep him up and play for a while. Then at night I would put her in her bed and when she woke up to eat she woudl eat then right back to bed no playing in between. Within two weeks they shoudl even out. Again be as patient as you can it just takes time.

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S.S.

answers from Dallas on

unfortunately, you don't. my baby is 15 weeks & on a more consistent routine now. to try & put a newborn on a schedule is just not a good thing. do everything possible to sleep when he does during the day & be sure he is getting plenty to eat- whenever he wants it (don't listen to the feeding schedule people until he gets to be at least 2 months old). some days he may eat every 3 hours then decide he's hungry an hour later. it took me a few days to figure that one out. a full belly helps him sleep more! what did help me was keeping things as normal (lights & noise- don't tiptoe around him) during the day, & keeping things dark & quiet at night. this may help to reset his clock. good luck & hang in there. i know you're the most tired you've ever been in your life, but it gets easier!

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A.T.

answers from Dallas on

This happened to me too. The lactation consultant told me to do "cluster feedings" at night. So I would feed him every three hours then the last 3 feedings were done in 2 hour intervals. This made him get really full and not have much of a chance to snooze before bed time. it seemed to really get him to get on track.

best wishes to you!

Also, do you have any other children? my church has this awesome program for new moms called Square One. Here's a link to it: http://www.watermark.org/ministries/care/square-one/

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E.C.

answers from Dallas on

This is very normal. It will take him a while to adjust. It is a little hard to get them on a schedule at 4 days old. My best recommendation would be to try and sleep when your baby sleeps during the day. However, you could also try waking your baby up during the day for feedings to keep him awake a little more during the day. He will start sleeping more during the night eventually. It should start getting better at about 3 weeks; then even better at 6 weeks. Mine is a little over 2 months old and goes to bed at 10:30pm, wakes at 2am and wakes at 4:45am. This is a blessing; however, it took a bit to get there! Hang in there. The first few weeks are the toughest!!!

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C.T.

answers from Dallas on

Newborns are pretty much going to do what they want and you have to go along with what their needs are. However, things are constantly changing with little ones and next week he may be sleeping much better, but maybe not. It will be quite a while before you get any real sleep, but you could try interacting with him during waking hours and just feeding him with little interaction at night. That's what I did with both my boys and they never seemed to have a problem with the day/night thing. Congratulations and good luck. I wish I had known about this website when my first was a baby, but then I would probably have spent all my time asking questions!!

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E.B.

answers from Dallas on

Simply put -- you don't. He is FOUR days old. This is normal.

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K.C.

answers from Dallas on

I didn't have to read all of your responses, so sorry if I duplicate!

With my daughters, I documented their schedule for 24 hours.Then I switched it. I woke them up during the day to use their exact night schedule. Worked within 1 day! good luck

ie. at night wakes up for 3 hours, asleep 2, eat, etc.

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S.G.

answers from Abilene on

A good sleep schedule takes a little time. My son was the same way! I thought I'd never get a night's sleep again. But sooner or later, we started getting in sync with our sleeping. I co-slept/sleep with mine and it kind of lets him know when bed time is. I would feed him in bed with the lights out which probably signaled to him that when the lights are out, its time to sleep. We got into a routine where we would go to bed between 9 and 10 and wake up, for good, between 8 and 9 the next morning. Of course he would wake up every hour or so during the night, but when he did, I made the least amount of movement, changed him, and fed him to put him back to sleep! It worked for me and he still is on a similar schedule at 10 months! My husband was away in the air force so when he came back, I had to teach him our ways and work out a few kinks, but it should work for you!!

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L.B.

answers from Dallas on

Babywise worked for both my kids. We have #3 on the way and I plan to use the system again.

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R.C.

answers from Dallas on

Make the time to read On Becoming Babywise (often just referred to as "Babywise"), written by Ezzo and Buckman. The book is usually at Wal-Mart. It will help you with that and more. Truly a must-read.

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S.O.

answers from Dallas on

I have three and my middle one did this. They are so little and they want to sleep all the time, but if yours is staying up at night but sleeping during the day, you can change that! It is hard though. You must wake up the baby every 3 hours during the day and feed him. Undress him, use a wet cloth, rub his back and tummy, whatever you can to keep him awake long enough to feed and if possible to look around for a few minutes too. Some may say this sounds like torture, but I say that a bedraggled mama is worse! If you keep this up, he will figure it out in a couple of days, but you have to be vigilant and sometimes it is convenient for them to sleep during the day so you can get stuff done, but just set a timer for every three hours and stop what you're doing to wake him up. All of the babies I've ever known that had to stay in the hospital for longer than the usual couple of days went home already sleeping through the night because the nurses are vigilant about keeping them on a schedule during the day. I hope this works for you! Good luck!!!

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C.S.

answers from Tyler on

Hi T.!
Welcome to parenting! At 4 days old, the little guy is probably going to be up to eat every 2 or 3 hours anyway, so there's your schedule. We have a 6 week old, and it took a while to get anywhere near a schedule. There are times when he still keeps us up much of the night. What you can try to do is wake him up to eat every 2-3 hours in the day, but at this point, you're in the eat-sleep-poop phase, so you probably won't be able to keep him up too long at a time. But as the weeks go by, try to keep him up a little more during the day. Still - it will be some time before he sleeps for any significant amount of time at night. Also - is there someone who can help out and trade on and off with you on night shifts, so you can get a little sleep now and then?
Good luck!
-Christina

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M.B.

answers from Dallas on

Welcome to mommyhood! Start a good bedtime routine (bath, book, music, etc) and take a bunch of advice from all these great moms who have already posted. Be paitent I know that 6 week mark still seems really far away, but that seems to be the magic number for most babies. It is a lot of work for these little guys to adjust to the outside world. Enjoy and sleep when he sleeps for now! Don't worry about the house you'll have time again one day.

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R.L.

answers from Dallas on

My kids were the same way. What I had to do was keep them up during the day. It was hard but I played with them to keep them awake and when they did take a nap during the day, I had to wake them up after an hour or so. It worked for me...hopefully it will work for you too.

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H.H.

answers from Dallas on

You're precious little one is like most other newborns....all they do the first week or so is sleep, eat, and poop. They're trying to adjust to life outside of the womb and are just so tired from the birthing process. It's too early to try and get him on a schedule, but you can try and make days different from nights....days---keep lights on, let sun in windows, and don't 'tip-toe' around; nights---dim lights, don't have tv on, keep things nice and calm. Also, during the day don't let him nap through a feeding. So wake him up every 2-3 hours to nurse/bottle feed. That way by night time he's well fed and somewhat sleepy.

Good luck to you and enjoy the time he sleeps :)

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S.S.

answers from Wichita Falls on

He was used to sleeping with the lights on at the hospital. You might try a bright ish light near his crib. At 4 days old, though - he's still sleeping 19 hours out of 24. It's just in brief intervals.

I will tell you this though - if he's sleeping, you sleep.

Survival mode.

S.

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C.G.

answers from Dallas on

Read Babywise. It is awesome

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R.A.

answers from Dallas on

Our tried and true trick is to keep the lights on during the day, the windows open, dishwasher going, vacuum cleaner going, doorbell ringing, dogs barking, etc. MAKING it daytime for the baby. Then at night you can turn lights down, soft music on, etc. MAKING it night time for the baby.

It's no doubt they come out messed up. While pregnant, we are awake all day and moving around so we rock them to sleep and they sleep all day. And then when we lay down and get still at night, they wake up. Then they come out and we expect them just to flip flop after nine months of this routine.

Also, starting routines very early on helps ALOT. Feeding, bath time, diaper change, rock before going to sleep every night will help them know what is coming (expected) next.

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