A year ago I divorced and moved to Houston on a promise of a better life with a man I have known for years. The first few months were a struggle because he wasn't use to having kids or dogs around. My daughter went back to Utah for school and so it's my 13 year old son and I living with this man that my son has never known and is going by his mom's hope for a better life. We moved into his brand new home and because of his working away from home things slowly became more stable. As time went on he challenged me about my kids and how I they have been raised and didn't agree with pretty much anything I did or they did. My kids are pretty good. They aren't into drugs or running the streets. My daughter has a full scholarship to college and my son had struggled a bit last year in school due to the fact that I moved him so far away from his father and friends. Basically all he has ever known his whole life. They may challenge me at times, but overall are Great kids.
In February this man I live with lost his job and so things have really gone down hill. All he does is point out my faults and my son's wrong doings. We can do nothing right and he is so perfect. He has serious anger issues and recently busted the thermostat in the house because my son changed the temperature on it. Also, he slammed the back sliding door when mad the other day because he didn't like what I was saying. It shattered one of the glass panes. The thing here is it's his house and he doesn't care. He has worked a couple odds and end jobs here and there but nothing consistently, yet tells me I do nothing to help with the house payments and anything else. I pay the second morgtage, food and other necessities, utilities, dog needs, cell phone and gas for the vehicles and needs for my kids. I don't get child support on a regular basis, but that's a whole other story. I have written all that I pay out on paper an basically it's equal to the mortgage payment he's suppose to make. And on top of this I have my own bills. The deal here is I have worked two jobs since November, yet I was promised when I moved here that he would be taking care of me and I wouldn't have to work two jobs again. I had worked two jobs most of my life and when married did it to support my ex-husband and my kids. That's one reason I left my marriage after 20 years because I had nothing left to give and yet here I am doing it all over again. Not only am I killing myself for this man and for what, but it is hurting my son, too. He hears his mom cry and argue, just like when I was married to his dad. But, worse, this man has SERIOUS anger issues and I sometimes fear that it may be turned on me.
I need to move now and am looking for a place to live in the Spring school district so that my son can finish his year out at Wells Middle School. If anyone can tell me of Home/Condo for rent that may be available or apartments that take Dogs, I would greatly appreciate it. I don't plan on staying here once school finishes next year.
Any input you have is appreciated.
I wanted to tell all the amazing women who sent me information and support for this difficult situation I'm in, how very much it is appreciated!
This truly is a network of information and support.
Hi K.,
I am selling/leasing/renting a home in Spring. We are in the Cypresswood/dale division right around the corner from Wells.
Maybe we can work something out.
email me at ____@____.com
I wish you the best with whichever route you choose.
---K. C.- Black
K.,
I can feel for your desperation, and will keep you and your children in my prayers.
Do you have a friend or any friends that you can turn to for comfort, some quiet time to reflect?
How many bedrooms are you looking for and what is your price range. I have a friend that is in realty and maybe he can keep an eye out for me. There is a fully furnished apartment across from my work, but it is no where to being in Spring. This is off of Kempwood and Gessner in Houston. Here is the information on it:
Sub Lease Opportunity
Furnished Apartment
Address: Spring Shadows Apartments
10101 Kempwood Drive
Houston,Texas 77080
Contact for appointment:
Abhay Wanjari
____@____.com
###-###-#### (Texas)
Rent: $500/Mo.
Lease Exp. APRIL 2009
Security Deposit: $500
Application Fee: $40
I too am 47 with three gorgeous children, 27, 23 and 21. After going through a divorce from the kids father, I remarried and endured a very, controling and manipulative second marriage for 5 years. Same situation...I was constantly being told to change one thing or another with myself or my three children, nothing was ever good enough. Apparently, I was a bad mother for loving my children too much, as your children, they were not in to drugs, street gangs, etc... yes, they challenged their boundaries, but what child doesn't? I finally left after his final threat of divorce if I didn't change more things that he had listed for me. It was never ending... I prayed and prayed for three years for God to save our marriage... "I got saved from the marriage". I lost my identity and my children had to endure the controlling and manipulating ways of his, hearing me cry on many nights. This is no way for a child or children to grow up, thinking that it is ok to treat someone, anyone in such a manner.
After the last threat of divorce in 2005, I finally threw my hands up and heard God speak to me... "walk away and trust in Me". That is when I found the following website and it helped me see things from a new set of eyes. I continue to direct friends and women to it, and will continue to do so.
http://victoryas-friendship-poem-archives.com/FLOWER/THEA...
I was scared, but I did it. Before I could even move out, I left there with a fractured eye socket and a fractured nose due to his anger. I was very blessed to be able to walk away from that nightmare and it was then that I vowed to voice my experiences if it would even help just one woman from experiencing the nightmare I went through. This is a closer look in to my life and how my life has turned around.
http://afaithbiggerthanfear.blogspot.com/
You are a good woman and your children should not have to see their mother endure such pain. You deserve so much more in life, and know that God will carry you through this.
Many blessings to you!
S.
I'm sorry I'm not familiar with Spring area. I just want you to know that I am praying for you. You have a plan of action and are on your way. God be with you and you children during this transition.
If there is any chance he will be violent towards you or your kids when you leave, please get counseling from a women's shelter to help you stay safe - they may also have programs to help you finanically when you do leave. Call -
Northwest Assistance Ministries • 15555 Kuykendahl Road • Houston, Texas 77090-3651 • ###-###-####
They have both family violence and other helpful programs and are close to your area. I strongly recommend their counseling also so your child can talk about his feelings after what you all have been through.
Good luck and God bless . . .
You may also try www.realtor.com
Good luck.
Go to www.co-abode.com, register for free, and locate a Spring-area mom to co-house with (cutting your expenses in half and giving you and your son a nice place/atmosphere to live in until you move back at the end of the school year. To begin to repair the damaged trust between you and your son, perhaps with a cost saving living environment you can let go of the 2nd job & spend time with him talking, planning your move together, and planning to see your daughter when you can. Do not let this guy know where you are going. If necessary, call the Houston Area Women's Center for shelter & support information at 713-528-6798/Hotline ###-###-####. The Advocacy Services team there helps with housing resources for sudden moving needs such as yours. Call them to talk.
K.-
I hope someone has a good lead for you on a home. If not, here is a link to the local real estate website http://har.com/
You can search for leases and you can select Spring school district to narrow down your options.
Best of luck to you and your children,
K.
