Need Help with My 3 Yo Sleeping Habits

My 5 year old is the same way. I find that if he can distract himself he will not sleep. I highly suggest taking any toys out of the bedroom. The bedroom should be a sleeping place not a play place. And my 5 year old doesn't usually take a nap unless I lay down with him and literally pin him down so he has no way of distracting himself. Not fun, but at least he gets a nap. And as for bed time....I am constantly telling him to go lay down. I don't really have any advice for getting him to bed at night, other than just be consistent. What you do to get him down at nap time, do at bed time that way he will catch the message that it's sleeping time.

Four hours is way to excessive for a nap for a four year old. Like you said, he is probably making up for not going to sleep well at night.
First I would move his bedtime to 7:00, 8:00 is when my second grader starts getting ready for bed. A three year old should be sleeping a good 13 hours solid including naps. Getting so tired like you said on only 7 hours at night is going to effect his mood and his health. I know if my kids get overly tired that it makes it hard for them to sleep. Try getting him to bed before he is wiped out and doing it sooner. For naps, how long does he take before he falls asleep? My rule was if around three they took longer then 20 minutes to fall asleep, they weren't tired and I wasn't going to force daytime sleeping. I then just adjusted an earlier bedtime then.

My four year old is in bed by 7:30!

Then take the toys out of his room, so he has nothing to play with. Start a chart for every night he goes to sleep without an issue. Have him earn the toys back with positive behavior. For my son we started each morning off with four bedtimes stories, if he didn't nap well or fought bedtime he lost a book for every little issue we had, so some nights no story, even now this works so well for him as he loves bedtime stories!!!!

We do our bedtime routine. I stagger it between the two by an hour so my oldest isn't going to bed that early. I put my kids to bed and they know they had to stay in bed. Of course you cannot force sleep but you can lay down the law they are not to get out of bed once in it. For every night he doesn't go down well, tell him you will move his bedtime up by 15 minutes! Meaning earlier!

My son last year was in bed asleep by 6:45 because he chose to give up naps. He made a deal with me if he gave up naps he would go to bed earlier, so we did it. Now he is four I have moved up his bedtime to 7:30 and my daughter 8;30 and both sleep until 7:00am.

I have a 3 yo daughter, a son who will be 2 in about a month and am expecting the beginning of next year. I had the same problem with both of my children (expecially when I first found out that I was expecting again). I finally gave in and let my 3 yo take over her own sleeping schedule. She does not take naps anymore (we do quiet/school time when my 2 yo is napping). What really helped us was setting up a really good relaxing routine for bed time. My husband and I sat down with our kids and talked about the importance of sleeping. Then had them help us set up the schedule. It is a good 2 hours of wind down (including bath, teeth, energy using activity, reading, prayer, etc.), but has not failed us after the 1st week. She now sleeps a good 10-11 hrs at night. Just be patient and down let him win the battle. It takes a lot of energy and control. The big thing is consistancy. Kids love to have bounderies, rules and routines.
Hope this helps.

C....

A four hour nap is WAY too long. I would suggest waking him up after an hour and a half, two hours at the most. I know he might be cranky, but that will only last a little bit. Personally I would rather have a grumpy toddler for a little while in the afternoon and then a full night of sleep! Put him to bed earlier if you shorten his nap...think of it as you would for yourself. If you slept for 4 hours out of your day, you would have a difficult time falling an staying asleep as well. If you think about it, he is sleeping for almost a 1/4 of the day...so come night time, he is ready to play.

Good luck...I'm sure you will find a way to get more rest for everyone...at least until the new baby arrives :)

You need to get rid of the naps, the first week is the hardest until they adjust, keep dinner light and be ready to entertain. If he is sleeping 2-4 hours a day of course he isn't going to go to sleep at night, he completely recharged himself during his nap, and is part of the reason he gets up so early, he isn't amking up for sleep he gets to much in the day and only need a little at night. Once you get through the week you will notice he is ready for bed earlier and will sleep longer periods at night.

I don't think that is what you wanted to hear, but good luck!

I would agree with Jennifer. None of my 3 year olds took regular naps. They just didn't need the sleep. They will take a nap once in a while like when we have mommy group and they go to the zoo for 3 hours or when I take them to the mall and we walk the whole thing upstairs and down but never if we are just hanging out at home. If you need the quiet time naps provide then if possible just allow him to stay up with a stack of books, crayons at the table, or another stay at the table big boy toy that is he can only play with at naptime. Even though mine don't sleep we did do a movie in the middle of the day on weekends when our big ones were little so that we had some mommy/daddy time to talk and hang out together. The kids really loved it. They would get their special movie time sleeping bags out and "camp" with snacks and a sippy cups. The sleeping bags were not so they could sleep but so that there was no fighting among them about who was closer to the TV or who was touching who.

You have gotten a lot of great suggestions, like taking away nap time or lessening it to 1 hour for 14 days, which is the time it takes to create new habits. Also, make sure his belly is full. Yogurt is a great thing to eat to help you sleep better. Let him watch a really short movie to help him wind down.

I would find out how long a 3yo is suppose to sleep for naps and keep his naps within those guidelines. At night keep putting him in his bed. The first time tell the child it's bedtime. If he gets out again don't say anything and put him back in bed. Conutine the same thing until he learns to stay in bed. I have watched this method several times on Supper Nanny. It's hard but it teaches the child that it's time to go to sleep and not to play with his toys. Good Luck!

sometimes its hard to switch their sleeping habits, but it sounds like he doesnt need the nap anymore. I know he will be cranky for the first week, but eventually he will be tired sooner and possibly fall asleep around 7:30 or 8pm. When my daughter gave up naps i was more sad because i enjoyed the time when she was sleeping, but once she got her new routine down it was much better! If he his playing he most likely is just not tired yet. Another thing, try to run him until he is exhausted right before bed, this helps to get any last minute energy out. hope this helps!
A.:)

I am in the exact same situation. I have two boys both 3 and 1. My 3 YO does the same exact thing and think I have pretty much come to accept that he is outgrowing the naps. If he doesn't take a nap I still have him read books in his room or play quietly so he doesn't wake up his brother. At night he goes down much better. I'll have to check back with your responses to see if you get any good ideas!

Hi C.,
A 4 hour nap is way to long at his age, he certainly isn't going to be tired at 8 in the evening after sleeping for 4 hours during the day. I know there is a lot of work we moms get done during those 4 hours naps but they are over. Have him participate with your activities, they learn a lot then. I would try putting him down for a much shorter nap, which you have, but stay with it for a few weeks and let him get used to the new schedule. Also do a physical activity if you can, a bike ride or play tag in the back yard or go to the park after dinner to let him run off the extra energy. If he is really worn out he will probably hop in bed and go to sleep.
Good luck,
SarahMM

this age can be so hard because of the nap time changes. my almost 3 yr old gets really mad if i wake him from his nap too, but if he sleeps longer than an hour he is up until 10 or 11, even though i put him to bed at 8. if i don't encourage any nap, he falls asleep around 5. so what i do is to wake him after an hour nap (on the days i can get him to take one) by getting him immediately involved in something that he doesn't really have to participate in, but is interesting enough to get him waking up. things like sitting on my lap while i play a simple computer game or reading books on the couch. those are for the times he's kicking and screaming when i get him up because they are things i can do while holding him. for times that he's calm but just laying in bed refusing to wake up, i try inviting him to do things like wash dishes with me, play outside, play a board game, or eat a snack. after the initial fits when i when i wake him, he eventually gets involved in something and is fine, then goes to sleep at a reasonable time that night. another thing that helps is to take him outside to play or put on music to help him move around shortly before nap time. then he usually realizes on his own that he's getting tired and is willing to nap. good luck during this transition time! eventually he won't need a nap at all.

We had the same problem with our 3yr old girl. What we did is allow her to sleep in her sleeping bag, we made a big deal about it, and it has seemed to help.

C.,

Welcome to the wonderful world of three-year-old boys. Your angel baby turns to a devil baby overnight, you don't know what happened, and you wish your sweet little boy was back. You can't find him. He is not there anymore.

Do not dispair. This is probably a temporary phase while he is shifting into a new phase of development. In six months or so, your sweet child may return, even better than before. So hang in there. Be patient. Be firm and consistent in reinforcing good behavior and in discouraging bad behavior. And love him anyway. (He is probably so cute, you can't help yourself on that one).

It is not easy, but it is worth it. And, sometimes, perfectly dreadful three-year-old behavior can be pretty funny, too.