Need Help or Advise About Tapering My 3Mth Old off the Bottle for Night.

Have you discussed this with your pediatrician? I think that with a baby that is essentially 9 weeks (gestationally) old it is unreasonable to expect him to sleep through the night.

I know it's tough to get babies to sleep through the night and even tougher for us mommies to not get to sleep through the night.

I would suggest talking to the doctor first.

Secondly, I have found that successful night time sleep in a baby over 5 months (not yours yet!) is more about falling asleep and less about feeding.

I just really caution you to push the little one to sleep longer by reducing the amount of night time feedings... for now at least!

Best of luck. Mine is almost 7 months old and still wakes up 1-2 times per night... but not for feeding. I usually go to him to snuggle for a few minutes so I dont stay awake in MY bed listening to him fuss. probably not the most efficient way to do it, but every minute I can sleep makes a huuge difference in my work day!

I'm not sure if you are breast-feeding - but try mixing in a little cereal in his milk bottle (you will need to widen the nipple opening since it is thicker than milk.) I breast-fed both my kids but as they got older, I my Pediatrician suggested this - it just fills them up and lets them sleep longer between meals. If you are breast-feeding, just pump some milk and add a teaspoon or two of rice cereal to a bottle for the before bed feeding (check with your Dr. first) but this seems to work wonders! (and since I nursed, this became my husbands chance to feed the kids (and I got a nice little break :) Good luck! (check out my book for other mommy ideas: www.coolyourepregnant.com)

Hi H.,

I hear your frustration of wanting to get baby off the bottle through the night, but his desire to feed every 2 1/2 to 3 hours is very normal. He is still very young to give up night feedings! Sometimes if you can feed baby more frequently in the evening they will go longer between feedings through the night. But sounds like your baby is still hungry. If he had gone full term, he would only be about two months old! Give him time... be patient. As he grows his tummy will get bigger and he will be able to go longer between feedings.

H. W.

At 3 months he is supposed to eat every few hours. As for the family bed, if it is/was working for you why change it? Tell your family to buzz off, it works for you and you get sleep! When he wakes up in the night to feed, keep him awake to feed. My baby was a "lazy sucker" according to my doctor. My baby is nursed, so it's a little different, but the rules should still apply. When he woke up, I'd get him undressed down to his diaper and take my shirt off. This is to keep him cool enough to not want to go to sleep so he'll eat, yet your body tempurature will rise slightly so he isn't freezing (unless your house is too cold in which you'll need to modify some parameters). Rub his cheek if he stops sucking. Pump his arm to annoy him, tickle his feet, etc. I don't know how much formula babies drink at this age, but my baby was truly full when he unclenched his hands while nursing. Good luck and go back to the family bed if it works for you. It didn't work for me, because I can't sleep with my baby - he's noisy and kicks a lot. Oh, and if your husband is the one who doesn't want the family bed make him do all of the night feedings!

H.,
As a mother of four children and a career in birthing I would advise you to just be patient your little one is not ready for Any of the expectatins you have of him he is just way to young and not mature enough yet. He is waking in the night for feedings because he needs to be fed try to not lose sight of the fact that he was born premature these babies need extra care and attention, As far as moving him to his own bedreoom and crib I would give that a few more months to. As far as your work goes they will just have to understand your baby comes first and if you practice this it will be much easier in the long run and your baby will make these adjustments it is just clearly to soon.
Take Care and enjoy your motherhood...

Hello!My daughter used to get the bottle for bed until about 2 months old. My husband actually took her from me and said She doesn't need a bottle to go to sleep. He let her cry for probably 20 minutes. After that she did not need a bottle anymore. I know its hard to hear your child cry but it worked for us. You should do it on a night that your family does not have to work the next day. Good luck!

Hi H.,

Unfortunately, I think you're expectations of your son are a little unrealistic. Every baby is different, as is every doctor, but my doctor didn't even give me the okay to let my son cry it out until he was 4 months old. Then, he still woke up for feedings throughout the night (though I breastfed, and it slowly became less often) until he was 8 months old! That's when he finally slept through the night. And now, at 27 months, he wakes up again once a night (now just for me to cover him back up). So, I don't know of any solution to help you out, persay, but I just wanted to let you know that sleep is never going to be the same for you, now that you're a mommy. It's just part of the job I think. I'm sorry if this is discouraging news. It helped me when I realized that this is just how it is, rather than always trying to fight it.

Good luck,
M.

Not all babies sleep through the night at 3 months. Some at 2 months and others take up to a year! I would suggest changing your feeding times. Your last feeding should be closer to 11:00-11:30pm. Also, are you using breastmilk or formula feeding? Breast fed babies require more frequent feedings (every 2.5-3hrs).Later in the evening may be a little rough if you"re going back to work, but maybe get Dad to help with that last feeding? Changing the time to a later feed will help your son to get on a friendlier schedule with working parents and wake up closer to early morning.

as many others have said, gestationally, your baby is only about 2 mo. old. he does need to eat frequently. also, the AAP recommends that the safest place for an infant to sleep for the first 6 mo is in the same room as his parents. http://aappolicy.aappublications.org/cgi/reprint/pediatri...

actually, a great book about kids and sleep the world over is by james mckenna, anthropologist who has studied sleep and sids for decades (http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/). his new book is sleeping with your baby: a parent's guide to cosleeping (which doesn't always mean in the same bed!).

if only we were in another country where there is parental leave for a year or more. at a lactation conference - canadian nurses didn't have to know about teaching moms how to pump etc bc their moms get to stay home!

Hi,

I have an almost 5 months old daughter. We had similar problem since I wnt back to work when she was 3 months old. We started a daily rutine ( a schedule, that most people do not really like, but it works for us). So she has feeding playing, stomach time, sleeping and over again. At night I gave her a bath every night before she goes to bed, and put her in PJ and feed her. At night when she woke up I just talked to her, and toeched her back or stomach or head, so she new, I was there and she is safe...and she went back to sleep. It takes a few nights without sleeping, but should work.
Worst case scenario try to swaddle your baby at night, for a few nights, and when he sleeps through the night with that for a week you can try to let him sleep without it. Also putting my baby on the stomach helped with the transition.

Hi there, I think he's still way too little for you to "get him off the bottle for bedtime"...plus if he came 3 weeks early he really isn't even 3 months yet. I have two premies , my now 2 year old son was 7 weeks early and my daughter now 3 1/2 months was 8 weeks early. As for having to wake up every 2 to 3 hours , well honey :-) that just comes with the territory...it does get better just give it some time. Also my 3 mo old is still inthe bassinet next to me, i find this much easier for her current feeding routine. Why rush him out? he'll be big and grown befor you know it. hope that helps a little.

Not going to happen anytime soon. The nature of breast milk is to give an amazingly nutritious, easily digestible first food. In other words- it's the best food for them, but it is fully digested in three hours or less. Formula is gone in four hours or less, but the extra possible hour is not worth the trade off in nutritional value (especially in the brain developement and immunity areas). Consequently, for at least a few more months he's going to continue dictating your schedule with his needs. Yes, you'll be exhausted, but it's worth it in the long run and it won't last forever. I know it sounds calous or off-hand, but I'm going through this sleep vs. feeding issue too and I just had to ask myself which was more important in the long run? My child's nutritional and developmental needs being met or a few extra minutes of sleep? Especially since he's a premee, don't push him! He knows what he needs! Do you have anyone to help by taking some of the night time feedings?

Hi H.,

This is what I learned through an infant parenting class with the goal of having your baby sleeping through night by 4 weeks old. YOU create the schedule for your baby, the baby is unable to tell you when to eat, sleep and play at that age!! right? Children need structure and at that age it makes them feel safe. Try to feed your baby every 2-2.5 or 3 hours starting at approx. the same time in the morning every day. When you go back to work will he still be waking up at 10AM? Give him 7-8 good feedings during the day. So let's say he starts at 7AM - go for 9AM - 11:30 - 2PM - 4PM - 6PM - 8:30PM or something like that. With this as his last feeding of the day he should be sleeping through the night in no time. So then you can put him down in his own bed in his own roon. And the likelihood of him sleeping through night without waking up hungry is pretty good. Change always takes time and patience. If you stick with the schedule you'll start to see the changes real soon.

During the day schedule playtime immediately after every feeding, this will prevent him from associating eating with sleep time. Then put him down for a nap. (I'm not sure how many naps he's taking at this point) These guide lines are more for infants but they really worked for us.

The problem with demand feeding (when your baby tells you when he's hungry by crying) is that by the time he's crying he's starving! So the schedule should be eat, play and nap every 2-3 hours! And please, remember, there is always that exception to the rule - in other words always use your best judgement.

Hope this helps you - it really was a blessing for us and our daughter was sleeping through night at 8 weeks old!!

Good luck and keep us updated on how it all works out for you and the little guy.
E.

It's normal for him to still wake so often at 3 months. My son is 3 months as well and was doing really well at 5 hours between feedings but now has regressed a bit. I wait to put my kids in the crib until they start rolling over on their own (about 4 months.) Just be patient, try keeping him awake longer during the day. Feed, play then sleep. He should be up about 2 hours and sleep 2 hours. Wake him if you need to and get him to eat as much as possible. Keeping him up for two hours before napping again. It's A LOT of work, but it does help in the night hours. I feel your frustration.

H.,
I have three children, now grown. I wasn't a working mom at the time, but the "toll" of getting up to feed during the night still had an impact on my day; lucky I was still at home!

None of my children were off the bottle -- or slept through the night -- at three months. That's very young. Your baby not only needs nourishment from the bottle, he needs "nourishment" from the time you -- or his daddy -- spend with him, holding him. At this age, the only things he needs are the basics: food, clothing and knowing he's loved and safe.

I, too, let my babies set their own schedule. They eventually slept through the night, without a bottle, but when they were ready to do so; infant bodies grow in so many ways during the first year, it's amazing! If you can postpone your return to work by even two months, it will make a big difference in your life and your baby's.

Both of my daughter's babies were preemies. She had regular visits from a home nurse, who advised her on a lot of things. As a new mother, as well as a mom of a preemie, I'm sure you've got a ton of questions; are nurse visits an option for you, through your health insurance? It might be something you could look into.

I know you wanted to know how to get your brand new son off the bottle, so you're probably disappointed with my answer; it's my advice, and you can do what you want to. My recommendation is to wait a few more months. Good luck in whatever you decide to do!

"Grammie" K.

The bad news is most of us don't get much sleep for the first year...
Babies need to to eat in the middle of the night.... 3 months seems very young to ask him not too. Maybe if he falls back asleep after a few sips, wake him up and make him drink more...
tickle bottom of feet, pull on ears etc.... the newborn tricks.
Try to take naps during the day when he sleeps and if you have a partner ask them to take shifts on the bottle.
This too shall pass....

My personal opinion is that a baby that small SHOULD BE feeding on demand. I wouldn't even consider getting rid of a bottle or feeding during the night until he/she was sitting up on his/her own and therefore, most likely, eating baby food. Will your husband take turns with you on the nighttime feedings?

H.,
This happened to me with my son. It is important for them to eat when they are hungry. I am a mother who does do on-demand-feedings. My boy never over eats. My pediatrician said to try and soothe him when he wakes up (and not feed him)try picking him up and putting him on your chest, etc... but if he still cries it means he is hungry. If you are formula feeding they can go a bit longer but if you are breastfeeding then they do need to eat every two to three hours. Does your son have reflux? Mine did and he woke up every hour to two hours every night. They are just more uncomfortable sleeping on their backs. I had to put one of those sleeper things in his co-sleeper so that he could be partially upright when sleeping. It did help.
You also have to remember your son waas 3 weeks premature so therefore he is more like a 2 month old. They need lots of food. This stage does not last forever and my opinion would be to let him eat when he is hungry and keep him in your room. It's only a few more months before he will change.
Trust me as hard as it was when he was waking up every night, part of me misses that stage cause now he is so much bigger and sleeps through the night and seems to be so independant. Which is good but a part of me misses that little baby time.
Good Luck!

H.,
Hello. I have to say that as soon as we made the big move from bassinet to crib at about 2 months his sleeping improved drastically !! He slept throughout the ENTIRE night. We put him down at about 10:00 pm and he would sleep until 7:00 or 8:00 am !!
L.

I think you've gotten a lot of advice on the bottle issue. I do agree and my daughter wasn't taken off the bottle until she was about 9 months old. (During the night though I breast fed her)
We did however, put my daughter in her own room and in her own bed at 3 months. We transfered all her bedding including her bumpers into the crib and she actually slept the whole night through. She continued sleeping all the way through for about 3 months but then she started teething and eating once a night. You never know what they are going to want but we do sacrifice sleep especially that first year. It doesn't last forever though. My daughter now goes down at 8pm and doesn't wake up until 8am AND takes a 2-3 hour nap during the day. Something you'll get to look forward to. =) Good Luck! Ps. I wouldn't try the "cry it out" method at this point! I was never able to do it but this young would be really hard.

Your baby is still so young! I say just keep feeding him when he's hungry. Perhaps in a few months, you can try eliminating one of the feedings each night and slowly work toward right before bed and at wake up. Since I breast fed (and had to work), I was up alot each night and tired. When I felt that it was not hunger any more and my baby was healthy and the right weight, etc, I held my baby at the wake up times and rocked him ('night night baby!) and yes, he screamed for feeding BUT within a few days (difficult to be sure) he got the message.

If you can handle waiting a bit longer, keep feeding but otherwise, wean the night time slowly, and just soothe him down. If its too hard, feed him. He's a baby.

Hope this helps! I am a mother of two boys, 2 and 4 and we survived that very tiring first year!

Three months, especially with a preemie is really early to be expecting them to not be hungry through the night. Even with my son on solids, he was still hungry at least until 12 months at night.

I know that returning to work will be hard with having to get up, but you will just have to adjust accordingly. I would suggest going to bed earlier, making sure that you nap whenever possible (like on the weekends) and if you have a spouse or partner, engage them in helping at night (obviously if you don't, this won't work).

Three month olds are just starting to come out of their shell. You aren't going to really be able to expect a routine at all at this point. ANd if you do, it's just going to change again and frustrate you. Actually, my 22 month old is just now really adjusting to going to bed at a certain time and waking up only once a night for water. You're in it for the long haul. Go with the flow, some nights will be good, others will be bad. When you look back at these times, you won't remember how hard they were, you'll only remember your precious baby.

As far as moving baby to his own room, I would also recommend keeping baby in your room with you a little longer. DS still sleeps with us. It's SO much easier than walking into the next room in the middle of the night and having to really get up. There is nothing wrong with having your baby in your room with you at night. They will probably not be sleeping in there once they're ten years old and definitely won't be in there when they're 18, so just make it easier on yourself and let him stay for a while so you can get more sleep.

I also would NOT recommend giving solids in an attempt to sleep better. Solids should not be introduced until at least 6 months due to allergies forming when babes are introduced early.

I always encourage an active response to a baby. Remember that his only effective means of communicating his needs with you is crying. He was attached to you for 9 months inside of you and even now, he's just starting to get used to being outside of you. Attending to him quickly at night will encourage him that you are there and that he is not alone. He is not yet able to quiet himself and self-soothe. He's still so young.

I know it's hard, mama. Every mother in time has been through this and has had doubts about their abilities to parent and has struggled through those really hard hard nights.

hugs,

Jen D.

Hi,
My baby was around five months old when she started sleeping completely through the night. She did it on her own gradually. At first it was a feeding every 2-3 hours and then 3-4 hours until we were down to just one feeding a night. Once she slept through the night on her own, I let her cry it out after that if she woke up. I think three months old is a little early to expect a full night without a feeding. Since your baby was premature, he might be a little older than mine when he finally gives up night feedings.