Need Help Keeping My Two-Year Old in Big Boy Bed

Updated on August 19, 2009
J.N. asks from Chandler, AZ
10 answers

Hi Moms! My husband and I recently moved our two year old son into a big boy bed. He sleeps fine in it once he falls asleep, but getting him to go to sleep is a nightmare every night and every afternoon for nap. He is constantly getting out of his bed and leaving his room. I don't want him to get in the habit of one of us laying with him until he falls asleep, so I'm looking for some suggestions on how to get him to stay in bed once we tuck him in. We are expecting a baby at the end of October, so I'd like to get him as situated as possible before his whole world changes. Thanks in advance for your help!

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J.J.

answers from Phoenix on

We used a baby tension gate across the doorway. We had a routine of reading them a book or two before bed then they could look at a book or two in bed and then go to sleep, but they had to stay in their room. Good Luck!

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K.B.

answers from Yuma on

You didn't mention exactly how long ago you switched your son's bed, but it will take a little while. He is discovering a little bit of independence. We are expecting as well, and moved our two year old to a big girl bed. It tooks almost two weeks for her to stop being excited about being able to get up. We almost gave up after the 1st week until we decided to take all of her toys and books out of her room (books are mainly what she wanted). I got some black out blinds, and at about day ten, she started just playing in bed until she fell asleep. It's been almost a month now and she is great.

I decided to lose the sleep now, because I am much more exhausted in my last trimester and there is NO way I would try this after the baby came. So I am happy that we did it and stuck with her. She is very proud of her big girl bed now. ood Luck. I know you must be so tired, but it will be worth it.

P.S. maybe you can try a baby gate in his doorway to keep him from roaming around the house?

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T.J.

answers from Flagstaff on

I sympathize because we recently did this with our family. We moved our almost 2 year old at the time into a big boy bed due to having a baby this September. We also didn't want him getting in and out of bed, as well as into the house if we were asleep too. We started off with putting a baby gate in his door because I wasn't going to close his door at all. The first few days and nights, my husband or I would sit just outside his door and anytime he started to get up, we went in, put him back in and came back in without saying anything. This seemed to work with our little guy. If it's a disobedience thing, let him know before hand that anytime he gets out of bed, you're going to come in and take something out with you. A blanket, stuffed animal, etc. . . We have not needed to do this, but we took a parenting toolbox class through our church and the pastors wife had mentioned this. Good Luck!

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A.D.

answers from Tucson on

With my son, we made sure his room was a safe environment, and then put up a gate in his doorway. He gets out of his bed, but then once he's tired he'll usually crawl back into his bed or fall asleep on the floor. I asked his doctor and she said it was fine. Maybe he is just not tired?

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D.K.

answers from Phoenix on

here is what we did for our very strong willed daughter. We needed the crib when she was about two, so she needed to be in a big bed. We took all toys and anything hazardous out of the room and put the mattress directly on the floor. Then we put a baby gate in front of her door. I left the gate off during the day so that she could go in her room when she wanted. At night she was in her room and it didn't matter if she slept on the floor or on the mattress. Point was...she had to stay in her room. It only took a week to get her to not cry at the door or freakout. After about a month I took the gate off the door. The first night she refused to stay in her room and thought it was a fun game until I put the gate back on. She never "escaped" again.

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D.S.

answers from Phoenix on

J., get a gate for your son's door. My son was in a big boy bed at 18 months. The same day I put up his big boy bed, I also put up a gate. I think in over a year he has only cried at his gate 2 times because he wanted to get out. He understands he is not coming out to play and immediately goes back to bed. Often once he is asleep, I open the gate and leave it ajar so that if he wakes up, he can walk out and find me. We travel for months at a time and I just take the gate wherever we are going and it works like a charm even in unfamiliar places. I bought a Safety First Tall gate from Target online. I highly recommend it. Good luck.

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S.D.

answers from Phoenix on

In our two year old's room, we put one of those door nob lock things on the inside (the kind that you squeeze to open) so that when her door is closed, she can't open in. We also have a video monitor so we can see what she's doing when she's in there. Do you have a baby monitor? If not you may want to consider one so that you can do the same thing. I would try to explain to him that he needs to stay in his room for "quiet" time and give him a few calm, suitable toys that are okay to play with until he's tired enough to crawl into bed and go to sleep. Good luck!

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M.G.

answers from Phoenix on

I always transitioned my kids to the big bed by putting side rails on the bed. It felt more like a crib and they never crawled out with the rails on. When we took the rails off they were alittle older and better able to understand the consequenses.

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K.E.

answers from Phoenix on

I agree with the first response. If you feel you want to still try, I'd try saying things like, "I am so proud of you being in a big boy bed." "I know you can stay in bed until
you go to sleep, and I am so proud that you listen so well. Thank you for staying in your bed." The hard part is walk
away and see what happens. He may not be mature enough to stay, but it's worth a try.

Ours are 15 months apart and I put my little one out of her crib so the baby could have the crib. However, she had already been crawling out of her crib. Was your son climbing out of the crib. If not, it may not be worth moving him yet. The new one can sleep in a bassinet for several months, so you don't have to rush it.

Take care,
K.

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S.R.

answers from Phoenix on

I would put him back in the crib for a while. If you are due in Oct, the baby will be in your room for awhile. Don't rush it, not worth losing sleep!

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