Naptimes

My 1st was this way--only a few short naps during the day even at a very young age. But she did sleep well at night. She's now 14 & up until the teenage stuff hit, she just never needed naps during the day, just some quiet time. Remember, each child is different. If you try all these other suggestions & they don't really help, just accept that this is her sleep style.

It may sound horrible, but the swing helps my 5 month old daughter take longer naps. We have also tried putting her down in the crib when she appears sleepy rather than wait until she is sleeping to move her in there. Consistency helps, and by this age, she should be napping around the same time everyday (morning, afternoon, late afternoon, and possibly an evening nap before bedtime). I know every child is different. Good luck.

We went through the exact same thing with my son (now 1)! I had just written it off as him being a bad napper/great nighttime sleeper and was thankful for that, until he started going to a babysitter at 6 months. Every day he would take 1.5 to 2.5 hour naps, and it would drive me crazy that he wouldn't do the same at home! The only difference was that she put a small fan in the room, so I ran out and bought the exact same fan.

I didn't like the draft in his room, though, so I found a CD of an electric fan on Amazon and I am convinced THIS IS THE TICKET! He now takes at least two great naps at home as well as at the sitter's. It goes for one hour, fading slowly out at the end, or you can set it to repeat so it keeps going forever if you want.

We also learned not to go in right away when he started crying, and often he will go back to sleep for a good long time. Otherwise, he'll play and talk in his crib until he gets bored and squawks for someone to get him.

Good luck! You've got a lot of advice to choose from :-)

I recommend the book "On Being Babywise"
It was so helpful when my daughter was a baby, and I still use a lot of the things they talk about in the book.
What came to mind when I was reading your post was what they call the "45 minute intruder" This is when the baby wakes up 45 min into the nap so we think the nap is over and we get them up, but they are still tired and cranky. My daughter would do this and instead of going in and getting her up and trying to either nurse her back to sleep or rock her, I would let her self soothe. NOW, before any of you out there think I let my baby cry and cry, that is not the case. If she would wake up, I would look at the time, and give her 10 minutes. She would cry a bit, usually less than 2 minutes (which seems like 3 hours but it isn't) then she would stop, and start cooing and within 5 minutes would be back to sleep. What she was able to do was calm herself down and not depend on me to do it for her. I am not saying this is easy, but it worked wonders. She took 3 naps a day til she was about 7 months old, then went down to 2. She is now 2 1/2 and still takes a good 3 hour nap every day. She has slept through the night since she was 4 months old. The reason... I read this book and put into practice the suggestions they put forth. The main one being, that the parent needs to direct what is going on, not let the child determine what the day is going to be. Babies, and young children thrive on a schedule. It give them security and comfort. We had and STILL have a pretty set schedule and on those days when things get disrupted, we get back to normal by bedtime. People comment on how good Lily is when she needs a nap, she grabs her blanket, and bear and says night night while heading to her room. She rarely fusses (although there are days!!) And bedtime is pretty good too. She is totally comfortable sitting in her bed talking to her animals and reading a book til she falls asleep, and isn't depending on me to comfort her at every turn.
Don't get me wrong, if she cries and I know something isn't right, I am there in a nanosecond, but if it is just a fuss or a whine, she usually knows she won't get her way and goes to sleep.
The book is "On Being Babywise" There are others too about toddlers and older kids. I haven't read those, but want to as she grows up.
Good luck.

Neither of my kids were nappers. Oh well. They are both smart, bright and fun. I found their not-really-napping stage exhausting, but they both followed the same pattern. It's probably just your luck of the draw. Don't worry about it - and try to enjoy it :o)

I helped both of my boys get to sleep, nursing them until they fell asleep & oh-so carefully placing them down. But they could & did sleep anywhere, the store, friends houses, etc. Still takes them some time to settle in for the night. Both needed a bottle for far to long after they stopped nursing (#1 stopped at 16mos & #2 at 9mos). You should see our dentist bills - LOTS of cavities :(

I am determined not to make the same mistake with our daughter. I make sure she stops nursing before she's asleep or wake her just a little before I lay her down. She can actually fall back to sleep on her own if she wakes up & wow is it nice, she may fuss a little, but does not cry. I do not let my babies cry it out-I hate to hear my babies cry. #1 is soooo sensitive, I worry that it is because he never learned to sooth himself back to sleep, etc.

It never seemed like my babies slept as much as they were 'supposed' to, with regular nap schedules, etc. We have a neice & a nefew the same age age as #1 & #2 & they had a lot more energy, but took long naps & slept longer at night - but never stopped moving when they were awake. So I guess they needed better & more sleep to recharge. Try finding ways to help her help herself get & stay comfortable at naptime. make sure she has a dry diaper before you nurse her, only wake her just enough, so she opens her eyes as you lay her down, keep it a little quiet & a little bit darker in her room, but not like it is nighttime, maybe try going to her as she stirs & give her her pacifer, maybe she'll calm back down & go back to sleep, try not to wait until she is really awake if it is too early for her to get up.

Good luck & if she does wake without seeming tired, than the nap was long enough. Remember all babies are different, our family is proof.

Jess

I am the mother of an 11 month old, but I think when my daughter was around 3 or 4 months, I started nursing her on our bed lying down. I continue to use this to get her to sleep at night, and it seems to work better than anything else I've ever tried. If you've never tried nursing lying down, I would encourage you to try it because it always puts my daughter to sleep. You just have to be sure to put pillows around her if you don't plan on taking a nap with her in case she's to the point where she's starting to roll over. And, when she was 4 months, she was sleeping more during the day than the two short naps your daughter is taking, so I hope this helps!

Good for you for being a no cry mommy! :)
How are her sleep totals overall? My son hasn't always been the best sleeper, but I found when I looked at his sleep as an overall 24 hour total, he was generally within the recommended totals/averages. I always count from midnight on, since that is a stable time and count as the day goes by, while factoring bedtime. The average 4-11 mo sleeps around 14 hours per day, with an overall range of 12-16.5 hours total. That being said, it definitely sounds like based on her behavior she may need more naps...
I would also try putting her down for her naps sooner, it sounds like you may be missing her sleep window and she's a bit over tired. It can be super hard to read some babies sleep signals, so don't beat yourself up about not being able to tell. Its all well and good for a book to tell you all the signs, but they aren't there to read the intricacies of your little one. Try putting her down 30 minutes sooner than you usually do, if that works great, if not, try 45 to 60 minutes. Play around with what works best for you and your daughter. Keep in mind the general rule, never keep a baby awake more than 2 hours.
When she starts napping more, try your best to never wake her up- even if it means ditching your plans for the day. Let her wake up naturally. Those plans can almost always be rescheduled.
Black out shades are a must around here, along with a CD of ocean waves (can be bought at Target). When we travel, they go with us. Black contractor garbage bags and masking tape make easy travel black out blinds, if you are staying somewhere with more light. I always have a stash in our travel bag.
Several people have mentioned it, but the swing can be your best friend. My little guy (now 18 mo) always had a lot of gas, so sleeping on a flat surface caused him a lot of tummy pain. The combo of mylocon gas drops and having him in his swing made a big difference. He slept in his swing until he was 14 mo and now sleeps just fine in his big boy bed.
As a random aside on swings, there are only a few swings on the market that can be plugged in (all by Fischer Price- we have the rainforest one). If you find your little girl sleeps better in a swing, you might want to invest in one or you'll go broke buying all those D batteries, not to mention the waste.

I've never been told by another mom that their child does this. My, now 20 month old, did the same thing. As an infant (5 days old) and like clock work, he would wake up after 45 minutes. If he made it past 45 minutes than he would wake up after 1 hour and 15 minutes. IF, and this was extremely rare, he made it past the 1+ hour nap, then he would sleep for three hours (he didn't do the 3 hour naps until he was roughly 12 months old). I too was extremely fortunate with the night time sleep, he slept throught the night at one week. This meant in bed by 8pm and didn't wake up until 5-6 am. He is my fourth child, the first 3 were good night sleepers and nappers. My oldest took 2 naps until about 18 months old, each nap being 3-4 hours long; plus she would sleep 12 hours at night. What worked best for my screaming bundle of joy, was wrapping/swaddling him extremely tight and giving him a pacifier. I was able to put him down awake, in his crib. After the first wake up I would give him his pacifier back and leave. Letting him cry it out didn't work. I tried a swing, bouncy seat, car seat, etc. Nothing worked. We tried various allergy tests and anti-gas drops, because he woke up screaming. None of this found a solution. By one month, I stopped nursing, because he was worse with my milk than formula (I was eating very bland). We ended up adding "Gripe water" and bifidobacteria infantis powder to his formula, every bottle. Eventually, we weaned him off of formula at 9 months and that is when he started napping better. This meant he usually made it past the 45 minutes. By 15 months he usually made it past the 1 and 15 minutes. So most of his naps were 2 hours long. However, at 1 year I stopped giving him his morning nap. So, long story short.... up to about 6 months I pushed him to take 3 naps (45 minutes each). After that I tried for 2 naps, usually 45-75 minutes each (with brief waking/screaming). At one year, he took one nap that lasted 1 1/2 - 3 hours (with brief waking/screaming). Now at 20 months he typically takes a 2-3 hour nap. Every child is different. Books give you an average, your baby and my youngest bring that average down. It will pass! I know it is fustrating when the awake hours are just miserable. When an infant is crabby, it is hard to enjoy such a beautiful creation. I felt like my entire day was spent trying to have him take a good nap. Good luck!

Hi G.!

I can't wait to read the responses because I am struggling with naps too! My daughter is 13 weeks and I am also a first time mom. I could hardly get a nap either until recently. I am not sure that I did anything magical...maybe she just starting falling into a sleep pattern. I did read that babies start to have more organized sleep at 3 or 4 months so maybe our little ones just need a few more weeks. Anyhow--I am a first time mom so take this for what it's worth... :) Here is what I have been doing and have seen some improvement.

I try to keep her awake time very short after she wakes up for the first time in the AM. Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child says no more than 2 hours of wakefulness between sleep. It also states that the first nap of the day should start soon because it is sort of a continuation of night sleep. Who knows?! I found that my daughter was sleepy before 1 hour even---she would just start fussing (I finally realized she was likely tired). So, I tried to start soothing her a bit before the mark that I realized she would start fussing--say after 45 minutes.

At first I would hold her tight and rock her till she would fall asleep (often 20 minutes or so) and then I would VERY carefully place her in her swing (she won't nap in her crib yet!)---often her eyes would blink open immediately and I'd try all over. arg.

I have now realized that I have better luck putting her in her swing awake with her paci when I see the first yawn (before she starts getting fussy)--then she usually fusses a short bit (not really even crying) and I sometimes have to plug her paci in for a bit--and then she falls asleep for 2 to 2.5 hours. I also keep the wakefulness under two hours when she wakes up again--I find that I can only get 2 naps though--late afternoon/evening hours are harder to get her to take a nap even though I know she is tired...hopefully others have some good suggestions!

My daughter will be 4 months next week and she sounds exactly like your daughter. She sleeps really well at night, but daytime naps are few and far between. She typically takes 2 naps which are about 40 minutes long. It is rare that she will nap longer than an hour at a time. I have also felt that she could use more sleep. I've tried all the same tricks that you have, but sometimes it is more of a struggle to try to get her to sleep than it is to just let her stay up. My pediatrician told me not to worry about it, especially if she is a good night sleeper--she said that all babies are different when it comes to the sleep they need (even if the books try to tell you that they need a certain amount).

G.,
I'm sorry I can't be more helpful than this, but between 3-4 months, my daughter decided she wasn't going to take naps anymore. No matter what I did, it didn't help. I wanted her to nap, but was more thankful that she was sleeping through the night. Well, before she was 5 months, she was taking 2 naps a day. The morning was usually 30-45 minutes and her afternoon nap varied. I think your little one will eventually come around and take naps on her own. Sometimes if we played really hard, she would be so exhausted she would fall asleep on her own too. Hope this gives you a little encouragement that it should get better. Hang in there and enjoy the time you get to spend with her.

G.,

Congrats on being a mommy!! Isn't it great!! I have a 6 mon old who is going through the same thing. Although, a couple of months ago he did the same thing. I read a lot and asked my Dr., and everything pointed to growth spurt. Usually during this time, their bodies are adjusting...just not with sleep aparently! Be thankful for the night-time sleeps. She may also just not be getting enough to keep her tummy full...so she is waking up. I have done our night-time routine with a bath and a darkened room...this seems to help my little guy. Also, my guy seems to sleep a little better with me in the room...so here is your opportunity for a nap! He also likes a little background noise (because he's use to his noisy brother). So maybe a really dull playing classical cd or lullibies.
Happy sleeping!

All I can tell you is that my 2 year old daughter was the exact same way at that age. Slept well at night and hardly at all during the day. I tried everything to get her more rest during the day, because I thought she seemed tired too. Then suddenely around 6-7 months she started to fall into a very routine pattern of sleep during the day. She would go back to sleep about two hours after she woke up in the a.m., slept for about an hour and half, then she would nap again after being awake around 3 hours. I think her 2nd nap was about 2 hours. I don't think I was doing anything differently and in retrospect I feel like I 'wasted' a lot of energy and concern over something I couldn't really control. I would just give your baby the opportunity to rest by quiet time, a dark room, whatever works but don't spend too much time on it. I felt like I spent half the day rocking her or walking with her in her room, trying to nurse her to sleep and it wasn't doing any good. With good weather coming soon you can always pop her into the stroller and see if that puts her to sleep. :) Hopefully as she develops she will just fall into a better daytime pattern naturally. Good luck!

I had the same issue and it turned out that my daughters 25-45 minute naps were overtiredness. So, I started trying to catch her naps a little earlier and then she'd stay sleeping for 2 hrs. You could be missing the window of opportunity. If you miss it, it's hard to get a baby to sleep without fussing and a struggle.

Every kid is diffrent, but keep trying. Spend some days at home where you can listen to her cues. Put her down when she seems tired - rubbing her eyes or a yawn. Then let her do her thing. You can try to give her 5 minutes when she wakes up - sometimes they fall back asleep and that will help her try to soothe herself. She's too young for a lovie, but a pacifier might help. When you go in a pick her up and rock it's probably waking her up. I would think she would either take more cat naps or stick with 2 naps and have them be longer. My son is 7 months and he usually has a cat nap in the morning around 10 and then a couple hours in the afternoon around 1 or 2. Then he's in bed around 7. Not a lot of naps, but really this is my fault as we are always on the go in the morning.

I had the same problem with my youngest son when he was that age. His problem was that he was over tired so he wasn't napping well. I haven't read the No Cry Sleep Solution so I'm not familiar with the methods it talks about but I read somewhere else that babies should take their first nap about 2 hours after they wake up in the morning and each nap after that should be about 2 hours after the last time they woke up. I started using that as a guideline and it worked like magic. He started sleeping for more like an hour to hour and a half instead of 30 minutes and he was still sleeping at night.

Your problem sounds VERY familiar. My son did the same thing, although I could usually get him down for at least 3, maybe even 4 naps. There are tons of resources out there for helping children sleep at night, but not near as many for naptimes. For us it just took some time. I made certain that I got him to bed (and had a naptime routine) AS SOON as I started seeing his tired signals. I made certain he was awake when he went to sleep and basically the rest was up to him. Once he figured out what he needed to do to fall asleep on his own without my help, he continued to sleep after that first cycle (although sometimes his naps were still only 30 or 45 minutes long, he at least was no longer cranky so was probably getting the right amount of sleep). If he'd only been in bed for 30 or 45 minutes then I'd wait a few minutes before going in to get him. That did involve some crying, but he sleeps much better than he ever used to. Good luck! It's a rough road! I hope my story helps you.

My daughter is now 8 months old, but at that age she too only took little power naps. She fell into a routine though right around 3 1/2 months and now takes one good 2-2 1/2 hour nap and one to two shorter ones. It helped her to have a little more to eat around nap time. I think you also have to not be afraid to let her cry a little when she wakes up. My rule of thumb now is that if she wakes up crying, she needs more rest and I'll let her fuss until she's back to sleep. If she wakes up happy, she's ready to get up. Good luck!

Hi G.,
I totally understand what you're going through. My now 7 month old daughter does the same thing and has been from day 1. She too sleeps through the night very well, so I've learned to just try and be happy with that, since not a whole lot else has worked for us.
The best thing that does work for us is putting her in her swing. I usually give her one of her favorite toys and she plays for a little while and then most of the time she eventually falls asleep. I sometimes let her play and swing for 30-45 minutes before she finally gives in and goes to sleep, but then I generally get a good hour (sometimes more) nap out of her. I do think some children just don't need as much sleep. My child is very happy and active when she's awake, always wide-eyed and looking to be sure she doesn't miss out on anything. So I guess my only advice is try the swing if you haven't already. I do sometimes give her a little juice or formula, just a couple ounces to put something in her tummy, before putting her in the swing and I've found that to work quite well. And when she was only 3-4 months old, shushing worked too. I would put her in her swing and sit in front of her and shhhhuuuushhhh. I know it sounds weird, but it would relax her and she'd go to sleep.
Good luck finding something that works for your daughter and sorry I'm not super helpful. I just thought you'd like knowing you're not the only one that is experiencing the frustration of a child that doesn't nap.
And if yours continues to fight the naps as my daughter does, I guess just try to be thankful she sleeps so good at night. That's what has helped me make peace with our nap situation.

Good luck!
A. H

Hi, my daughter does something similar. We have found that when you put her down for her nap you can almost set the clock by when she will wake up...almost exactly 45 minutes later. But when we would go in and get her she would be tired and cranky again with in 30-45 minutes. So we don't go and get her right away. She babbles in her crib at herself for about 10-15 minutes and then she is back asleep for another hour or so. She is not upset when she wakes up...she doesn't cry. She just plays with her toes and "talks" to her bear. She used to do the same thing every time we put her to sleep, but now it is just happening at the morning nap. She is now almost 8 months old.

Does she act like she needs a nap, or is she just happy go lucky? My friend's son is 6 months and he has never taken good naps. He usually will sleep about an hour in the morning, and then he will only sleep MAYBE 1/2 in the after noon, then does not go to bed until about 8-8:30pm. If your baby acts like she really needs a nap, and just can not fall asleep, I would talk to her doctor. Good luck.

I'm going through the same thing with my daughter. On average she wants to sleep about an hour to two hours after she wakes up in the morning and after each nap. The problem is like with your daughter, she only takes short naps - at least for the most part. If I sit and hold her the entire time she's more likely to sleep, but that's not my suggestion to you. From what I can tell some babies just need more sleep than other, and in the case of our little ones, they just need less sleep than the average 3-4 month old. I know it can be frustrating, esp when she's waking up obviously still tired and needing more sleep, but I don't think there's anything you can do to make her sleep more than she is. Has she been like this since she got out of the newborn sleep all the time phase? If not, maybe she's working teeth and that's just making it hard for her to sleep during the day. Take comfort in the fact that at least she (and YOU!) are getting a good night sleep at night. My thought has always been that if I have to choose whether or not she'd be a good napper or a good night time sleeper, I'd rather her sleep well at night. Sorry this wasn't more helpful!

G.; i am a mom of 3 boys, the first son i worked hard to get him to take naps, i was also a stay at home mom this helped, i struggled every day , for years, then i had my second son, of whom was totally different, never knew when he would go to sleep or wake up , never needing a nap, and was just fine, 3rd son slept and was more average, but i realized kids are humans, and they will sleep when their body says so, no book can tell you when they will sleep and when they will wake up, do what is best for you and your child, some kids just dont need naps like my first son, he did well, without one, but iworked soo hard to get him to get one, and experience found out that he did not need one, and that fighting was not needed, i wish i could take it back and just let the child be happy, if they need a nap, you will know, when they are acting idfferently or maybe stubbornly, they may be tired, lots of signs, but also need to keep things balanced, so try what you can , and keep being a good mom as it seems you are, D. s