My Son Vs. the Toilet

I've had similar problems. My doctor suggested giving my child prune juice everyday. You can even mix it with another type of juice if he doesn't like the taste. Believe me, he won't be able to hold it after that. It's a much better natural alternative. Good luck.

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Jen,
I Don't really have any advice but I can tell you we are going through the same thing at my house only my son will be 9 soon. We have tried everything. We have another Dr. appt tomorrow to discuss more options. He was put on kristalose and in my opinion it made the situation worse. Instead of having 1 accident we were having 3-4 a day. The latest advice we were given(from a friend who is a nurse) was stool softener. We have not tried that yet, only b/c I did not want to make the situation even worse. My son has various reasons for the problem when you ask him, from he just didn't know to it hurts to go. if you want to e-mail me directly, feel free, ____@____.com If you do e-mail me I'll let you know what the Dr has to say tomorrow.

J.

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Jen~

I had a similar problem when my oldest was about 2. I would just want to cry because I knew he didn't want to go...and he NEEDED to go! My first piece of advice is don't make a big deal about it when he doesn't use the potty, but make a HUGE deal when he does. (Kinda like when potty training!) We started using the "bribary" system! When he went, we went...to the Dollar Store and got a toy or to get an ice cream, rent a movie, get a favorite snack. We would tell him, "When you go poopie, we are going to go get an ice cream..." and left it at that.

The next suggestion is look at a laxitive to give him a couple of days a week that makes it a little easier to go (or harder not to go). We LOVED Senakot. They had a root beer flavored that we added to apple juice (did I mention at times we were DESPERATE?!?) or actual root beer. We would not give it to him every day, but if we had gone 2 or 3 days without actioln, then we broke out the Senakot.

It took a few weeks before we were able to phase everything out and he was going on his own. When we were not as stressed (translated...when we didn't SEEM as stressed to him), he was able to relax more and that made everything easier. He wasn't worried about disappointing if he didn't/couldn't/wouldn't go and let nature take it's course. The more he is told "You need to..." the more he will develop an issue over it.

Hope this helps!

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Hi Jen,
We have been going through this with our little man also. We have tried a few things. We tried giving him water and then having him sit for a few minutes a couple times a day. We would read stories and try to make it relaxing. We also got charts that had 20 spaces for stickers and every time he told us he had to go potty and then went potty he would get a sticker. After 20 stickers he would get a prize. What finally worked with our son is we took a time out. We backed off for a couple days and then tried again. You may want to cut back on dairy also. This is what our doctor recomended to make his BM less hard. A friend told us to use Karo syrup in his drink. Just a little bit because it works very quickly! We haven't used this method, but I have heard it woks very well. I hope this helps.
L.

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We went through this with my daughter when she was 3 years old. Unfortunately it lasted almost a year and it was so aggravating to us. We would give her mineral oil per our doctors advice so that she actually could not hold it to the point that she got sick. I would mix it in some yogurt everyday and she never noticed it. Another thing we did was made her responsible for cleaning her underwear out when she had the accident, we thought maybe that would help discourage her so we kept a bucket in the shower and she had to rinse her underwear out in the toilet and then drop them in the bucket. Other than doing that we tried not to make a deal out of the fact that she was doing this and hoped she would eventually stop, which of course she did. I think it was just a control issue with her and our paying very little attention to it made her eventually get over it.

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My daughter is 3 1/2 now, but had this problem for 2 years until about 3 months ago. She would hold it for 5-8 days, and I would have to threaten suppositories for her to go. And when she went, it was so hard, she would bleed. She also does not eat a lot of fruits and veggies because she is very picky. She got it in her head that pooping hurt and was very afraid to go. The doctor told me to get Miralax, over the counter. I gave her one tsp in her drink, three times per day. A six year old may need more? It completely dilutes and they cannot detect the Miralax. It softens the stools and teaches kids that it does not hurt to poop. You are supposed to use the Miralax for a month, and gradually get them off of it. It took us about 3 months on the Miralax before she was convinced. Now, she goes on the potty and loves going. I hope this helps. I know how heartbreaking this can be.

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I can definitely relate to this! My son, who was a 5 week preemie, has the same problem. We have gone to the doctor, gave him medicine for this, talked with him, we have tried everything. This went on (sad to say, for about 6, 7 year. I have even made him clean his underwear out, throw underwear away and made him buy his own. We have explained to him that if we can smell him, doesn't he realize friends at school can smell him. Well, he is finally, at the age of 14, growing out of this. He is finally going to the bathroom and not in his underwear. So their is hope. Good luck!

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I am going thru the same with my son. We've done the charts the treats etc. But I didn't realize that maybe just maybe the toll it was taking on him with the move and new school and friends and daddy eing gone on deploment. These things play a huge factor. My son not feeling like he has any control over his world but this he does. Do you think that maybe the dark period your going thru is having an effect on your son and if so maybe you need to see a therapist for your son that is your son should. It could only help. Goodluck and I know this is hard I feel your pain at least with the pooping

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Hey Jen,
Make going to the bathroom a fun time. When you or your daughter or husband need to go, run around and get excited like it is really fun. I know it sounds crazy but it seems for some reason he is scared or it hurts him. Give him a reward when he goes and sit down and talk with him. Maybe he thinks theres a monster in the toilet or something. There is some reason why he doesn't want to go.

B.
www.MoreForMyBaby.com

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I raised 5 children and never encountered that problem but
when I was "nanny" for a little boy and girl, the boy would not go #2 on the potty, when he accidendly went in the little potty he screamed and cried when he saw it. I think he was afraid of losing something out of his body. I ended up catching him when he was going in his pants, put him on the big potty. I told him that his poopoo wanted to go swiming, so he was ok with that. After a few more times of catching him at the right time, he started going so he could watch his poopoo go swiming. Worked for me... A.

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Hi Jen,Have you ask your ped. doctor to check your son for Anal Fissures which a cures when the child becomes constipated and their stool gets so hard they strain to push and they tear, my daughter's son had that problem,it would cause him a lot of pain to pass a stool, he then would hold his bowel movements and the problem got worst.My daughter called me to see if this ever happen to any of my other children and if it could be hemorrhoids ,see he started to bleed alittle form his rectum and he would scream every time he had to go do a #2.I then looked it up in the web under medweb and found out that it could be Fissures, this is very painful where the child will hold their stool in order to prevent the stool from passing through ,so he would hold his #2.When she took him to her ped. doctor without even mentioning what it could be her doctor right away said it was Anal Fissure. Her ped. doctor prescribe him an ointment to apply and made sure he would start a fiber diet to prevent from this a curring again,it took a while before he got better because that area is moist therefore it take a while before it can heal but he's doing fine now.Thank God the poor baby its sad when our babies get sick, I will pray for you and your son, I hope this helps.

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My brother and son have gone through the same thing. Your son has had a traumatic experience. It hurt. It hurt before he had a blockage, and it really hurt during that time. He's probably scared and doesn't want to do anything that will hurt that bad. He doesn't understand that holding it makes it hurt worse! He won't understand. I don't know what my mom did. But, I would give my son prune juice daily. You can mix it 1/2 and 1/2 with apple juice. My son got tired of that. So, I now give it to him in a medicine cup just like medicine. I started out with one full cup of juice 2oz of each. Then I switched to 2 medicine cups. Once I knew he was regular and having soft bowel movements, I cut back to 1 medicine cup of prune juice a day. Then, 1 every other day. Once he realized it wasn't going to hurt, he had no problem and would no longer hold it. (You give him enough prune juice and he can't hold it, which was the point.) YOU HAVE TO BE VIGILANT WITH THIS THOUGH, or you're just setting him up again. And he will never trust you with this. Now, He tells me when he thinks he needs prune juice - he's now 5. But, we started this when he was under 2. It worked like a charm. But, if you start to forget the routine and forget to give him the prune juice (which we did one time) and he had a massive problem which was traumatic again and we had to start the process all over again. Don't forget! I'll never forget again. My other son doesn't have this problem. So, it's not just a boy thing. Your son may be somewhat intolerant to certain foods/milk or just naturally needs more water than most. Either way...Once you get him regular, keep the routine every other day. My son started reminding me because he did not want the pain as much as he was tired of prune juice. It is a natural and healthy way to solve the problem. Hope it helps.

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I went through a similar problem. Our peditrician put him on a stool softner so it would not hurt to go(Muralax). Then he sat on the toilet 3 to 4 times a day for 15 to 20 minutes-with a book to read or game to play(we even used a gameboy-this kept him on the toilet the longest without complaining). Then we went to a reward system. Every time he has a bowl movement in the toilet he gets a small reward(from a small toy to extra time on the computer or extra TV time, his choice). When he went a week with regular movements and clean underwear he got a big reward(bowling, golfing, or a big toy). It worked and he got over the fear that it would hurt to go. It has a medical name but I found info by googling soiling. I went to the doctor with the info I found on the internet but lucky for me she is a great doctor and knew exactly what I was talking about. Hope this helps.

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hey jen!
my daughter went thru the same thing for a while...it was very disturbing to me...and made me upset to know that all she had to do was poop, but for some unknown reason, she chose not to. i begged and begged her...it never worked. i went crazy singing and dancing whenever she did-didn't do anything for her. i then got angry with her and would scold her that "big girls go on the toilet and babies go in their pants (out of desperation) and threaten that she would need a suppository or a visit to the dr. if she wouldn't go-no results but more anxiety...i then decided to ignore it. make no big deal about it. thinking that maybe my increased interest in whether she went or not, made her more concious of wanting to hold it more. so after days of saying or doing nothing...she pooped and has ever since. try a different approach, something has to change to make the change happen...if you haven't done what i have...try it...i'll say a prayer for you.

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My daughter did this. We gave her an enema (gross, I know), but after that, she used the toilet every day because she did not want "the medicine up her bottom" to help her go. Also, have you tried a reward system? Try using a chart, with days of the week on it. Every time your son uses the toilet, put a sticker or star on it. When he goes 5 days in a row, take him to the store and let him pick out a prize. Or take him on a special outing (movie, Chuck E Cheese, etc.) (you use whatever is motivating to your child). You can find more info on toilet resistance at: http://www.med.umich.edu/1libr/pa/pa_btrainin_hhg.htm. This website helped me alot to overcome the same problem. Good luck!

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This sounds so rough! It looks like you received great ideas for the logistics of the situation. Hopefully, the doctors are also doing a good job ruling out medical problems. The one thing that stood out for me in your request was that you're going through a dark time. A lot of time, using the potty is a control issue and a sign of self mastery. Could your son be responding to your difficulties?

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I have had the same problem with two of my boys one of which is now 17 and he would hold his bowels until he would make himself sick? Im now haing the same problem with my 3 year old he will hold it until it is coming out on its own>>(gross)I have found that increasing his fiber makes it where he just cant hold it and when he does try I know he has to go because he starts jumping up and down and acting real funny.. I give him a glass of plum smart sometimes two and he doesnt mind the taste at all.. If all else fails and Ive noticed he hasnt gone in a few days I use those baby liquid suppositories and he does hate it but when I use that he has no choice.. I have noticed that sometimes if I just mention having to use the medicine he will come to me and say he can do it by himself... I also give lots of praise whenever he goes #2..hope this helps a little..

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Hey Jen,

Don't worry I could share a lot of Poo stories as well!! Advice from my own personal experience, as I have a son (almost 5) that has gone through this since he was an infant. First, find out if the #2 is painful when he does go. Which could be a big reason why he is holding it in! Does his tummy get bloated and drumlike?
Some of the things our doctor has recommended was limiting his milk intake to 20 ounces a day. (My son is now on soy milk). I guess too much milk can constipate.
One thing we have tried was a stool softener everyday, which the doctor okayed and then a laxative as needed.
But, the best advice so far has been Miralax, which the doctor said could also be taken every day. For my sons age about 1/2 a capful. Then everyday, after meals (when your body naturally needs to go) they are on the potty for 10-15 min. At first it might just be a lot of waiting. The important thing is getting them used to going #2 regularly and the Miralax should help with the difficulty and painfulness.
You can pick up Miralax at any pharmacy, you don't need a prescription anymore. Costco also has a large 2 pack that I love.
Also, the doctor advised that first few days the Miralax dosage should be increased to "clean out" anything that might be...well...in there.
We have also had to take our son to the ER, and believe me, making him stay on the potty is a lot easier for me than knowing how they would take care of the problem in the ER!
Oh and for my son, the doctor wanted us to slowly try to wean him off of the Miralax dosages as he gets older and more accustomed to the routine. You should also look into foods that he may like that are natural stool softeners. Good luck! It was comforting to know that there are other moms out there going through the same thing! Even if it is about #2!!! Hope this helps!

A.

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Hi Jen-
My son is 4 1/2 and not fond of #2 either. When he first started potty training it was a bigger issue, but now he just waits til the very last minute. He's only had one accident in over 2 years, but it is often a close call. What I have started doing is making him sit on the potty when I smell the gas indicator. (You know those toots that let you know it is more than just a gas bubble.) He may fuss for a second about not wanting to, but I just tell him it isn't up for discussion. Mama said it, you do it. It's always been that way around my house, so he knows it is futile to argue. I just had to fight my husband on this very issue last night. He said the boy is old enough to know when he needs to go. I told him to pipe down I know what I'm doing. Withing 30 seconds of being on the toilet my son was going - and grinning at me because he felt better.
Bottom line: On those occassions when you can tell he needs to go, insist he sit on the toilet for 5 minutes. If nothing is at least beginning to happen by that point he can get up and try again later.

Good luck!
~R.

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Hey Jen, My son who is 4 has the same issue!! He gets really bad stomach aches and ends up pooping in his pants, which is really fun when you are not at home! His problem is that his poop is so hard it hurts him to push it out so he ends up holding it, it gets even harder and more painful so he just keeps holding it as long as he can. We went to the pediatritian and she prescribed an oral medication. It is basically really thick yummy tasting syrup. But for some reason it really does the trick. He took it every morning and after about a week and half he started making reagular poop on a regular basis. It is one of those non adictive (so the Dr. said) no side affect medications that we now only give him about every other day or so. It is called ENULOSE SYRUP. Our ped. also recomended giving him a lot of raisins, Grapes, juices, fruits in general and cutting back on the dairy, especially cheese, which my son loves.
I H. this helps, best of luck and know you are not alone in this!

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A friend of mines son went thru this when he was almost 5. He had gotten constipated one time and it hurt him to go to the bathroom so he would hold it. He was scared it was going to hurt him again. So he would just hold it til i came out on his own. She wound up taking him to the dr and they told her to give him some stool softeners to make it softer, and show him it wasn't gonna hurt. I remeber it was a battle for her. She just had to keep telling him over and over this is what big boys do and mommy promises she won't let anything hurt you. My friends son, got it although it took a few months. I wish you luck girl!! God bless!

D. mattern
the mom team
raise your income and your rugrats at the same time!
Www.formyrugrats.com

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My son did this as well, while potty training and my pediatrician who has always been a God send, asked me to do something very simple. I put miralax in his juice at night. Now this is going to take time, effort, and most importantly patience. The miralax which you can buy over the counter now, is a stool softner. It will work by not really allowing him to "hold it in". At this point, you are going to have to become very scheduled oriented and do a "bowel training" exercise. I think it took two days, and when I noticed that he looked like he needed to go to the restroom, I went with him. We would sit there however long it took, I even read to him while he would sit there. After he finished I always rewarded him with something (usually skittles-his favorite) and within a week, he was able to let me know when he needed to go, without being afraid to go, and without the pain of bulk stools that had been held way too long.

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You might try message treatments. I took an infant massage class that focused on stomach massage for colic, gas, and regularity. Here is a link to a book on amazon.

http://www.amazon.com/Infant-Massage-Revised-Handbook-Lov...

Even though it is for infants, you can use the same techniques for older children I still use it on my son who is now 11 to help him with constipation from time to time.

You may also want to allow him into the bathroom when you or your husband go, so that he knows this is something natural, not just something stinky or gross. We did this with our son, and even though this sounds gross, even made a game out of the big poopy. Seems when you make a game out of something for some boys, they open up to it.

One other idea is that he was not getting enough roughage, and that it hurt him at times to go #2, so this may be causeing the delay it until it hurt real bad. Try giving him more roughage, grapes, etc.

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Preemies can be developmentally behind, especially if there are some physical problems. Also, you said you are going through a dark time right now, and that you lost a baby. This can have a very big toll on our kiddos. Stress and difficult times cause potty issues. My sister's daughter has been fully potty trained for two years and is back to pottying in the floor because of family issues. Perhaps a counselor could help him/you?

S., mommy to three NICU babies in a whole family of preemies (I was born at 36 weeks, hubby at 26 weeks, lost a twin during pregnancy, pre-term labor at 26 weeks with three girls, fourth born at 37 weeks, a whopping 7 lbs, no NICU!)

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Hi- I'm a special ed teacher and teach middle school, and i had a boy student having some issues w/ toileting....I had to do some research and found that while at middle school it is pretty uncommon, what you're going through isn't....there is something called encoprisis- might be spelled wrong...there is a web site (gross) called the poop-but it had a beginning of this info, then i just did a web search....I also found out that a teacher friend of mine went through this w/ her daughter, although it is more common for boys... some of what i remember is that they need plenty of fluids, exercise, and just as you said a scheduled "potty" time 2 x's a day...it is painful, and if it continues you need to take him to a dr. there are some biological causes as well, so you'd want to get it ruled out. The main thing it said was as a mom you shouldn't feel any guilt or shame, and neither should your son. Some changes can cause this in children that have been otherwise potty trained. As I said, i'm just a teacher, but having a 3 1/2 yr old i know how scary it can be when you can't "fix it".- my friends daughter would hold it and would soil her bed- at age 9!

L. Robertson, from TX

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Jen that is difficult I'm sure! I hate to suggest it, and you will probably, hopefully, get much better advice... however, have you thought of letting him have a diaper just for going #2? You could have him ask for it and then when he is done he can dump it in the toilett, flush, etc. A friend of mine had to do this with her daughter for a short period... she was doing the same thing.

I'm sure you have already looked into his diet to make sure he is not eating too many foods that constipate and make going #2 painful.

Best of luck!

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psychological counseling.... they do tht at this age. since it is fear that is holding him bac, then address where the fear is coming from. so scary... good luck-

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Find a new Dr. If he is that resistant there might be more to it. Like it hurts a little more then you realize or you might need to talk to a child psy. to see if there is anotehr reason he isn't going.

I don't have a 6 year old so I am talking as an aunt but if my sister had this problem that is what I would tell her.

Good luck

Just read all the other responses- Be careful with an enema. Talk to a Dr. before you do it to make sure you are doing it correctly.

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Hi Jen, we have or had the same problem with our 5yr old. Sometimes this problem is caused by stress and or constipation. Our son knew it would hurt his bottom so he would hold it. He would hold it for days. When he finally went, it was the size of a large baseball. We took him to a peds. GI doctor and he has him on miralax twicw a day. It works!!!!! We still have problems if for some reason he misses his med. Anyway, I hope this helps. Good luck from one Mom to another. PS. we have two angles in heaven. Hang in there.

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My oldest son went through the same problem. We, too, had to rush him to the ER. I took him to a counselor once and then my husband, now ex-husband, forbid me to take him again. He thought it looked bad. ANYWAY...I kept Fleet enemas on hand and used them when I had to. My son finally ourgrew it and can't remember WHY it happened. He's fine now. I think he didn't like the enemas and decided on his own to stop. God bless!

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I had my first son after having five girls...boy was I in for a surprise! They are completely different in every way. My son did this very same thing and I reacted much the same way you did. He would scream as he was going and would hold it for several days. I could tell he needed to go, but he refused. One thing we did was give him mineral oil or high fiber that would encourage more frequent bowel movements. Poor diet can cause harder stools and hurt as they pass.
I read and read and read all the information I could find on this topic and I found that boys are very attached to their "parts". When they see something "leaving" their body, they begin to think other things might fall off. With this in mind, talk to him about this. Don't ask him questions, just keep telling him matter-of-factly. Our bodies HAVE to get out all the yucky stuff and extra things it doesn't need. We could get real sick if we don't go. (remind him of the er visit) If you encourage a diet that will make him go more frequently, and tell him it's ok, he'll come around.
K.

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Jen,

I've never gone through this but it sound pretty scary. I will say that I have heard about other kids doing this. I know you said your doctor has talked to him but I would go back to your doctor and find out if there is anything else you can do since talking to him didn't work. Maybe it hurts him to go- maybe he has internal hemroids? Has the doctor checked everything like that out. There may be some reason he won't go. Will he talk to you about why he doesn't want to? In the mean time- try to push foods with "natrual" laxative qualities to them- banannas, pears, apple juice- I'm sure there are others.

Good luck- keep bugging your Dr. or find a new one- it's his job to help you keep your little one healthy.

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Been there, done that. Go to www.herbdoc.com and buy the children's herbal bowel cleanse, this will soften things up. Sit him on the potty with your elbows holding his knees apart so that he has to let it out and cannot suck his legs together to hold it in. All the while before and after and the rest of his life, he needs to drink more water. Take his weight, divide it in half and this gives you the number of ounces of water he needs to drink per day. No caffeine, no artificial sweeteners, no corn syrup, no genetically modified food products (corn & soy for starters). Organic is fine for corn, soy is fine fermented like soy sauce but not as a flour, lethicin or fresh eating. Add banana, grapes, watermelon, cantaloupe, honey dew, apples, raisins, pears, oranges, pomegranates, raw broccoli, raw cauliflower, raw sweet peas, raw caroots sticks. He has probably had too many painful movements and now expects all of them to hurt. It can also tear the rectum when it is coming out too large and that takes weeks to heal. In the end, he will go fine if you can show him it is not going to hurt and give him the right foods to soften the stool. Grind up pineapple and banana in the food processor and make popcicle, he will love those and never know they are good for him. I do this with all kinds of fruits and my little non-water drinkers gobble them down.

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My daughter used to hold it in also and my pediatrician had a great protocol on how to deal with this. This was 8 years ago so there is pobably an even better plan of action now. My suggestion is to take this very serious as the intestine will stretch width wise from being compacted which is very dangerous and the damage is irreversable. Talk to your pediatrician and find a solution that you think will work for you and your son. The most important thing of course is to make sure he drinks mainly water to keep him well hydrated. Water helps keep things moving as well as lots of fresh veggies and fruit (except bananas). Be vigilant on making him sit on the toilet. I would pull up a chair while my daughter was on the toilet and read to her. This would help her to relax and made it much easier for her to go. I put a magazine rack in the bathroom filled with kids magazines and picture books so that she would be encouraged to sit on the toilet and take her time. This helped tremendously!! Sometimes its a matter of anxiety about the toilet and other times its just not wanting to stop what their doing to go to the bathroom. Good Luck!

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Jen,

Both my daughter and my nephew went through something similar. I found the best thing to do was to reduce the amount of emotional stress. For several months my daughter would just poop her underwear and when it happened we would laugh and put the poopie in the potty and do a little dance to celebrate the poop. I know it sounds silly, but stress seemed to be her main problem. She was scared of the potty and still does not like to flush it. My nephew - we tried some more creative techniques...we put dye in the toilet so it turned colors when he went poop in there....but he absolutely refused to poop in the potty - and as a result...just refused to poop. This is a lot of info, but when things got really bad for him (and my daughter as well) we would put them in a nice warm shallow bath and do abdominal massage and try and get them to relax their rectums....they would poop in the tub, but at least it was coming out. There is a great juice called plum smart that is made by sunsweet that has all the value of prune juice, but none of that pruney bitterness...any foods with natural laxatives.
Above everything else, I suggest patience...it may mean cleaning poop out of places you don't want to, but if it is fear, then eventually it will work itself out.

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You are right to be concerned! When I read your message I immediately remembered Dr. Phil did a show on this subject a year or so ago. The boys (2 brothers) on the show I think were about 10-13. The boys were holding "everything" in that they eventually would have accidents. It was a true problem for the entire family. I do not remember how "it" was fixed but they were able to help the boys. I would contact the Dr. Phil show.

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(Husband here) My wife read your post to me and it hit in just the right spot. * I was your son * from age very young to my early teens, so I thought I would put my two cents in. I remember my experience with a clarity that will never leave me and talking about it has helped me in the years since. My mother was a pediatric nurse of 30 yrs and used to use my "recovery" and eventual success as a tool to reassure parents who came in with the same problem. The bottom line in this situation is that the child is in a terrible catch 22. When they have a bowel movement it hurts like hell, so they do not want to have the next one until they absolutely have no choice but to do so. At my worst I think I held a BM for well over a week and a half, so I know what I am talking about. You guys need to break that cycle however you can and my suggestion for immediate results is his diet. !!I cannot stress how important this is!! This little guy just graduated to a diet that would be appropriate for an elderly person...fiber fiber fiber fiber..and then more fiber. You need to bulk up his stools so much that there is no time for him to "hold it" and compact the stool while waiting for the next awful trip to the bathroom. I distinctly remember (why this finally happened, i do not recall) the first time I pooped two days in a row. I sat there marveling at the fact that my butt did not sting and hurt and ache like always. That was the tipping point, and probably the only reason I stopped being anal retentive. Please don't forget to evaluate his environment for reasons he may be wanting to "control" his trips to the bathroom, and be ready turn the spotlight on yourself and the family.

I could on forever, but I will try to sum this all up. Use your influence as a parent and caregiver to help him discover that there is another way to go to the bathroom = Often enough that it does not hurt. Include him in the solution, but make sure to keep it as private as he needs. Even at his young age this stuff is incredibly embarrassing...try managing this in the 6th grade...Ugh. I am 34 years old and I am just fine. I will never be as regular as the next guy, but I am fully functional and your son will be too. If there are any more specific questions you have, please let me know. I hope this helps.

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This could be encopresis...been there, done that. One culprit is being afraid to go "#2" at school causing them to hold it in, but there are many causes (holding it in because it hurts if he's constipated.) Google it and you will find a wealth of information. Holding it in for so long can cause nerve damage around the sphincter, resulting in no longer have the urge to have a bowel movement. Please read up on it...he may not be able to help this and there is treatment. Daily citrucel and a sit on the pot right after dinner worked for us. Good luck!

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