My Son Is Having Trouble Adjusting to the "Big Boy Bed"

We had an issue similar with my oldest boy. We solved the problem by getting a small aquaruim for him. This seemed to give him the comfort that he seems to need upon waking in the night.
S. J
______FIGHT LYME DISEASE
www.ShazzArtisticVisions.com

My son is 20 months old and has recently switched to the big boy bed as well. I have let him cry it out and it has worked. He has cried it out twice and thats it over the last 6 weeks. I also have books on tape he likes to listen to as he falls asleep.

my recommend is that you go back to the crib. Our pediatrician said that there is no reason to move to a "big" bed before age 3 unless your child is climbing out of the crib, which necessitates the move based on safety concerns. Otherwise, the crib is the safest place for a child under 3.

I totally understand. My daughter is 15 mths and I am 35 wks pregnant. It seemed practical to move her to a bed rather than buy a second crib but we have had a very hard transition. She has been in the toddler bed a month and a half and while she loves the big girl bed she has trouble going to sleep and sleeping through the night in it. I;ve tried everything I can think of. I was just going to go back to the crib but she is a monkey and can get in and out of that on her own to so I guess I just have to "deal with it". We tried letting her cry it out last night and she cried for an hour and a half. I wish you luck because I understand!

Hi D.:

Maybe you should consider allowing Jackson some time to go from the crib to the Big Boys Bed. It might be too soon for him, (not every child is the same) You know him better than anyone. This is a huge transition for him to make alone. He needs the support and security from both parents in that this is okay and how proud the both of you are of how he's being a big boy. He is also probably feeling some anxiety about the new arrival and this may be why he wakes during the night crying.

One thing that might prove helpful is have you both read him a bedtime story and then talk with him about being a big boy and how proud you are of him being in his new bed. Giving him lots of reassurance will make him feel secure. You may also want to include that he is going to be a big help when his new brother or sister arrives so he knows that he is important and you still love him. This may be an outwardly response to an internal battle he is having with the new arrival. Give him some time to adjust and be positive with him. If he continues not to stay in his bed then he may need a firm response that he can sleep in the crib or the big boys bed. If that doesn't work then I would suggest speaking with his physician for further help. Good luck and congratulations.

Jackson's behavior may be related to the fact that he can now get out of bed when he wakes in the night, and something about that freedom is a little scary in the night. Yet, as you said, he chose it. One of his first lessons in getting what you want and finding it not what you thought!! Safety is always the first issue, and if Jackson was still safe in his crib (not going over the top), he could have stayed there for awhile. If you still have the crib up and can try that for a night and see if first he will lay down there, and second if he rediscovers his security, then you will have found the solution you're looking for. If Jackson will have nothing to do with the crib, then next best would be to have a way to lie down in his room if/when he wakes at night, so both of you can sleep. You will be getting up with a new baby, and getting up at night probably for years, so just make it as manageable as possible for everyone. This will pass. Jackson will eventually sleep in his toddler bed, without waking in the night. I would not suggest just letting him cry it out, that way no one sleeps, and is a little like torture to lie there and listen. Remember sleep is the objective, not control. Just my opinion. LOL.

A little about me: I am a mom and grandmom, with children from 27-8 and grands that are 2, AND 1.

We had similar challenges with the big bed change over. Just keep encouraging him back into the bed. Maybe if he had a favorite toy, blanket, or maybe put it up against a wall or in a corner it might give him more security. This wont last forever, just hang in there and praise him when he gets back into his big boy bed.
Annie

We had a similar issue with our daughter. After trying many things that did not work, we discovered the following technique and it has worked like magic for all our kids. Tell you son that you will be back to check on him in one minute. And then do it. And then keep on doing it until he falls asleep. As he gets more comfortable with this technique, you can starting checking on him every 2 minutes, and then after a while, every 5 minutes or so. Now, we only have to go in once or twice, and our kids are asleep. At 22 months, your son may be a bit young to understand the concept, but sometime in the next six months, he should get it. With your second child, you may want to try to wait longer to switch from the crib to the toddler bed. I did the same thing with my first. With my 2nd, I waited as long as possible (until after he was 3, I think). Good luck!

We have a 2 year old and a three month old so we had this transistion over the summer. I feel your pain. We still have some difficulty and our two year old has been in the big girl bed since July. Our Pediatrician recommended letting her cry it out. We did but we gave her a nightlight and a special night time stuffed animal. The combination helped but it was difficult listening to her cry it out. Good Luck! Hope you get some sleep.

Ask Jackson what wakes him up. If it's nightmares, pray with him when he goes to bed. Ask God to set His angels all around Jackson. If He wakes up again, remind him that God has sent His angels to Jacksons room to protect him and watch over and keep away the bad things.
If that's not the problem, ask him if he feels safer in the crib.

I would suggest getting a white noise machine or sleep conditioner for his room. We use the Marpac sleepmate 980 in our 16 mo old son's room which makes a constant white noise, similar to a box fan. It's about the size of a small coffee can, and can be ordered online. It does wonders for drowning out house noises, and is quite soothing (even for us grown-ups). I also suggested this to my best friend for her 20 month old who was having night-waking, and she admits that she cannot live without it now!

My son (who is 7 now) also wanted to go to a big boy bed at around 2 and we had much of the same problems. What we ended up doing was putting him back in a crib for about 6 more months. It seemed that without the high rails his sense of security was lost. Good luck and I hope this helps!

in the immortal words of dr phil, you've got the tail wagging the dog. i am NOT a fan of 'cry it out', but sitting with him until he goes back to sleep is not doing anyone any good. you're too tired to be the best mommy you can to him, and he is being rewarded with your presence by waking every few hours, which deprives him of the sleep he needs to develop and grow. you need to make his waking as unrewarding as possible. put him back to bed with an assuring 'i love you' and make it clear he is to stay there, and you will be keeping him safe and loving him from ANOTHER room. if he is upset about that, a little crying won't hurt, as long as you don't ignore it for too long. an interval (10-15 minute) reassurance, without staying or allowing him to get up (reward) will make it quite clear that he's not getting much out of the waking up deal, and he may as well just stay in bed and get some sleep. good luck and enjoy him and your new baby girl :) j

ps..get a doula for your birth!!