My Mother Is Denying That She Has Bipolar Disorder and I Can't Take It Anymore!

I haven't read anyone's posts because I've learned one very important thing in dealing with other peoples problems:

"YOU CAN LEAD A HORSE TO WATER... BUT YOU CAN NOT MAKE THEM DRINK IT."

(Thank goodness it let's you edit your responses! Hit 'enter' before I was finished.)

The only thing you can do in the situations that deal with leading someone else to somewhere they don't want to go... it to take care of yourself and don't let their problem take root in your own life/mind/spirit.

If you truly care for them, you do as much as you can, point them in the correct direction, support them when you can, but do not let their situation or their life 'ruin' yours.

Hang in there, R.... /comfort /support /huggs and /strength.
J.

First of all, you ar not going to like what I am about to say but I have a mother, a brother, and an uncle who are all bipolar. First of all, how do you know it is bipolar? Sometimes those words are thrown around without any real basis. There is such a huge array of mood disorders. No one likes to be told that they have a mental illness. If she does have a mental illness, the only way she will get help is by she herself deciding to. As someone else wrote, mood disorders can get worse with hormones, environmental causes etc. but they aren't the only thing. She may not have a mental illness but there may be other causes. I agree with someone else too, YOU NEED TO MOVE!! If your mom is ill, (or not) but the situation seems to be really bad. Due to her illness (and lack of wanting medication) my mothers visitations with my son are always supervised because of her swings. You are doing your children no good by keeping them there. It may even be contributing to your daughters depression (yes I know that is medical too).
About your daughter, if you feel confident that you are taking care of your daughter's needs, it shouldn't matter what your mom says. Yes, you should be aware of the IBS, as it is usually genetic but if your daughter is not having problems, don't worry about it. If she des get her seen by a gi doctor, sometimes you have to push for those referrals though. I have crohn's disease (in same family as IBS) and it took my father taking me to 6 doctors before one thought I was sick enough for a gi but the gi agreed I needed to be there.
Good Luck..

I'm not sure what your situation is but I strongly suggest finding different living arrangements. Living with a mentally ill family member is probably not in your children's best interest.

I have a mom who is undiagnosed with a mental illness, and it's tough, but I don't have to live with her. I really feel for you, this sounds like a real suckfest.
I can tell you though, as being bipolar myself, that having someone tell you are bipolar can really make you feel like you are being persecuted. Bipolar disorder is a medical diagnosis, and really should be made by a doctor. Using the label prematurely might scare her. She may feel that everyone is against her. One of the biggest problems with mental health issues is that in order to get help, you have to have to mental clarity to see that you need help, but you don't have the clarity because you are mentally ill. Classic catch-22.
She can't be comfortable. As miserable as she makes everyone, she can't be enjoying that at all. I don't know if pleading to her maternal side helps, since telling her that she is hurting her family might make her feel inadequate and worthless on the inside and angry and hateful on the outside. If you took the less accusatory road, of talking to her in some of her calmer moments, that you see that she does not look comfortable in her own skin, even considering her other health issues, she might not feel as defensive.
As a mom, it's hard to hear that you are hurting your family. She's got to know that she is injuring the family on some level, even if it's only deep down. I am sorry you have to try and figure this kind of stuff out.
I wish you the best of luck.

Hi R.,you did not mention if you work or not.could you not get on public assistance and get you and your children in your own place?and get your children out of that environment. it is not healthy for them,don't you think the children would like to have their own space as well as you? I live in Alaska as well and even if you do work you can still get help with getting on your own.if I were you I would start by getting you and your children on your own then deal with mom.then maybe get some family together and have her tested.good luck to you but you need to make some good choices for you and the children then your mom.

Hi there R.,
I can relate some, my Step-mother was Bipoler and she had to be committed twice.But besides the Bipoler issues you really need to concentrate on you and your childrens well beings.My main suggestion would be counceling.If you Mothers not willing at least get things started with you and all of your children.Hang in there,God Bless.