12 answers

My Baby Prefers My Childcare Provider over Me!!!!!!!!!! WHAT DO I DO!!!!

My daughter just turned 9 months old, and over the past week when I go to pick her up, she starts crying when I take her from the babysitter. She has never done this before, but every day this week so has started crying the minute I pick her up because she wants the babysitter. PLEASE tell me this is just a phase she is going through!!!!!!!

1 mom found this helpful

What can I do next?

Featured Answers

Hi - I am a "Nanny" and I care for one child at a time, each day of the week. It has been my experience with infants, babies and toddlers, that when they are with one person for the better part of a day, that is the person they are used to - at that time. It has nothing to do with preferring someone over you. I have toddlers now, who cry like it's the end of the world when Mommy leaves in the morning, but as soon as she pulls out of the driveway, they are over it. When I leave at the end of the day, sometimes they say "goodbye" and sometimes they don't even care that I'm leaving. It's not personal! The great thing about children is they love the one they are with but there is no one like Mommy!

1 mom found this helpful

More Answers

This is just a phase. When I used to do childcare this would happen often. As a stay at home mom this would also happen with my husband- the kids would prefer him. Be consistanly loving just like normal. Whatever t-shirt you sleep in at night as a sleeping shirt have the babysitter put your daughter down with it - to keep the smell. Make sure you cuddle at night and read a book - you may want to tape yourself reading to her at night then have the sitter play the story to her when she puts her down. If all else fails remember this to shall pass, every phase is just that a phase.

2 moms found this helpful

if she's w/ the daycare person all day then she's probably grown attached to her. well, fact is that youre her mommy and will be there forever. im sure she'll grow out of it. just as long as you're spending as much time w/ her as you can, one on one attention, activities, fun, etc.

2 moms found this helpful

It's nothing against you personally. She just spends lots of tme with the babysitter and is comfortable with her. If she spent all day with you she'd do the same thing. But it just sounds like an attachment phase. I'm sure she will grow out of it. Dont take it personally. You are her mommy, there isnt ANYONE beter than you. The baby sitter is just a friend she plays with all day and it's hard to want to stop playing and go home.

2 moms found this helpful

D., This is a good sign! Even though it hurts your feelings you have to remember that you are the mommy and she will always have a stronger bond with you, but the babysitter takes care of her for the majority of the time and if the child likes them then that usually happens! Wouldn't you rather have her with someone she enjoys being with than having to worry all day that she is not being taken care of. Be happy you have a good babysitter that your daughter likes, what a bonus!

1 mom found this helpful

Be glad!! Just imagine she would cry all the time when you bring her there! She must be a good babysitter! I`m sure she still knows who her mom is, I don`t think you should worry.

1 mom found this helpful

Hi - I am a "Nanny" and I care for one child at a time, each day of the week. It has been my experience with infants, babies and toddlers, that when they are with one person for the better part of a day, that is the person they are used to - at that time. It has nothing to do with preferring someone over you. I have toddlers now, who cry like it's the end of the world when Mommy leaves in the morning, but as soon as she pulls out of the driveway, they are over it. When I leave at the end of the day, sometimes they say "goodbye" and sometimes they don't even care that I'm leaving. It's not personal! The great thing about children is they love the one they are with but there is no one like Mommy!

1 mom found this helpful

I am a day care provider and this does happen. It makes me feel bad when it does, I feel for the moms because I know it must make them sad, and I am sure that it is very hard to leave your little ones with someone. But do look at it in a differnt way. Look how happy and loved your 9 month old is. You would be very upset (and you should be) if your daughter cried all day at day care. But she isn't, and believe me, your daughter loves you, you are her mommy, your provider isn't.

It could just be that she doesn't want change, meaning she is playing and she doesn't want to stop doing that. It is like if you take a toy from her while she is playing with it.

Things could be worse

S.

1 mom found this helpful

Dear D. M;

I think this is what happen when the child went to child care. Which I don't blame any parents who puts their children in child care. I think your daughter is used to be with her for so many hours and she was not with you, it is normal to behave like this. But you're her mother and that's what you will planted to her mind and heart that her mom love and care about her. When you're not working, please spend some time alone with your daughter playing or getting her involve with your life even in the kitchen to be your little helper. Always pay attention to her and give her a lot hug and kisses and keep saying that you love her from mom. Please be patient and understanding. Keep spening a quality of time with her when she comes home with you. I have four children two adults and two teenagers. I am a housewife and raised this four children. I keep them busy. Take care and cuddled her a lot and hugging,kissing,saying you love her over and over to her, she will remember that.

A.

1 mom found this helpful

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