My 2 Year Old LOVES Television

hey T.!

i have an almost 25 month old daughter (started terrible 2's at 15 months) and an almost 4 month old boy. i know what you are going thru with the potty training and the t.v. thing. i wish i had some great advice for you. all i know is, my daughter is bright and she pretty much grew up with the t.v. on. she knows her alphabet and she knows how to count to 20. she knows her colors and shapes. she speaks in sentences and knows how to speak certain phrases in korean. she loves watching the letters and numbers shows on comcast's "on demand" channel. she actually asks for it all the time. she also loves to watch "night at the museum" and "happy feet". i tell you, "night at the museum" was a savior for me when i was pregnant because it calmed her down and she watched the whole movie every time. i was so huge (my son was 10 lbs 11.5 oz, 3 weeks early) that i couldn't chase her or play with her that much. i feel guilty sometimes for letting her watch movies/t.v so much, but i get over it quickly when i realize that she's learning from the movies/shows. i give her enough time outside (although it's difficult with the heat and humidity), so that she can use what she's learned from her shows out in the "real world".

i started the potty training thing when she was about 18 months old because she was saying that she had to poopy, but she didn't catch on and she wound up really hating it, so i stopped pressing the issue. i'm going to leave it up to her to come and tell me when she's ready. she is aware of when things are wet and when she's pooping or has to poop, but she still won't go on the potty. i can tell though that she's getting close. when i was pregnant it was pure hell trying to get her to go, so if your little guy is not doing it now or fighting you, i would suggest you wait for a little while.

sorry about the novel...i tend to ramble on at times. good luck with the pregnancy and let us know how things go.

Hi T.,

There is a web site: http://life.familyeducatio.com/toddler/behavioral-problem...

http://www.parenting.com/article/toddler/activities/Easy-...

Hope this helps. D.

I gave my son pots and pans to play with while I cooked and worked in the kitchen. Sometimes he liked to help me cook and put things away, etc. I moved all the toxic things up high in the kitchen and otherwise child-proofed it and the room adjoining the kitchen so he couldn't harm himself or anything when he didn't have my complete attention. I put up a safety gate to keep him in the area where I could supervise him. Also, I put cans and cartons down low along with pots and pans so he could take them out and put them back when he was in there with me. I kept most of his toys in that kitchen/dining area so he could have access to them. He had a play kitchen, so he could cook and shop while I cooked.

On another note, I purchased educational video tapes that were his movies. He was only allowed to watch movies that were educational for him. He didn't know anything else. I am still pretty strict about what he watches (he just turned 11 and he is only able to watch postive PG or under movies and plays only E rated video games). A lot of people disagree with me and his father and grandfather have broken my rules repeatedly, but I think it has kept him innocent.

I admit that I pacify my son with TV as well when I'm trying to get some thing done around the house. The things I have done to limit the TV time is get him out of the house and involved in activities. There are plenty of things to do with your 2 yr old; gymboree, MOPS, book babies at the library. play groups or dates ect. Some preschools even have toddler programs that meet once a week for a few hours.
At home keep some toys in the closet and rotate with the toys you have out every week or so. That way he won't get bored and he will get excited all over again as if they were brand new.
In our family were all tv junkies so we need the background noise. Sometimes I turn on music instead tv.
It would also help to have a scheduled daily routine something like this; 1 show in the morning, breakfast, play, outing, lunch, nap, play, one show, dinner, play, one show, bath, bed.
Hope this helps bit.

T.,
Even if most moms won't admit it--I think the majority of us allow too much t.v. I agree with the previous poster to at least have a schedule and a limit in mind andtry to keep to it. Just don't pop the set on every morning and let it run all day. If you do--of course he won't do anything BUT watch it! Pick times of the day that allow you to get something productive done.

T.,
My son is 18 months and LOVES Elmo and sesame street. He has 10 Elmo's world Dvd's and now knows when the credits come up the dvd is over and starts yelling until we change it. I have cut back his TV time by getting him outside (it has been really nice lately too). I also enrolled him at Gymboree in play classes and we go to open gym. Get your boy outside! Take a walk together, water the plants or blow bubbles! There is nothing wrong with tv when you are trying to get things doen, I do the same thing. Disney is educational so don't be so hard on yourself! I tried the coloring thing too and he wanted to eat the crayons :0)
Good luck
Christina

T.,

My 3 1/2 year old twins love the television and DVDs. They're only allowed to watch Disney Channel in the morning or parent-approved DVDs. Once they started with the movies, what I did was put the subtitles on. I figured if they were going to be watching them, they could see the words. Honestly, they like to have the TV on, but rarely sit still long enough to watch anything all the way through nowadays.

The biggest problem is that I'm now afraid to take them to a movie theater because they might get upset there are no "letters." :-)

Of course, now they Google their favorite movies on the computer. <sigh>

If it helps you keep your sanity then go for it. My daughter is 6 and she watches movies,she also has an amazing imagination because of it. She pretends she is ariel and we are all under the sea. Disney movies are classic and you know they aren't as violent as some cartoons. I also have a 15 mos. old boy who likes to watch the movies with his sister. I belive the saying, if mama aint happy then no one is happy. You are the mom and you will always know what is best for your children!

I, too, have used TV for a bit of a break during the day. However, I DON'T agree that a movie a day is OK. Movies are 1 1/2 -2 hours long! That's too long for ANY 2 year old to do one activity. Think about it... he's staring the the TV not moving around for 2 hours!!! I always feel guilty if I let my daughter watch an hour of Sesame Street at 2 years old. She's simply too young. You are the adult. Be the adult. Make a schedule and stick to it. One or two half hour shows a day and that's IT! You'll be glad for it when the baby comes... your son will know what to expect.
Music is a great alternative. Find some music that your son likes and listen to it often. It stimulates the brain and he can dance, move, color or play with anything while he's listening. Books with music attached (CD) are great!
You don't have to entertain him constantly!! As a teacher, I will tell you that this is a MAJOR problem with students today. They have a constant need for entertainmnet, instead of occupying themselves. It makes it difficult for kids to learn and study without a power point presentation! Get him interested in an interactive toy and let him play by himslef (with you monitoring, of course). Do you have the Leap Frog Fridge Letters? They are great and they teach phonics. They are magnetic so they attach to the fridge. He can play with the letters while you cook or load the dishwasher. Start workign on this now or when the baby comes you'll be at your wits' end!
Think outside the box - the TV that is. What did our grandparents do when there was no TV and most likely they had many more kids? Think about it - we are really spoiled!

Hi T.:) I totally understand what you are going through with your little guy. My oldest who is just about four LOVED tv from the time he was little, little, watching Baby Einstein. Winters were always the toughest for me because he couldn't go outside as much. He still watches a couple of his shows on PBS in the morning but then he is ready to go outside and play. He has outgrown it a lot. I would try to limit it to the times when you need a break, but I wouldn't beat myself up over it or feel guilty for wanting some YOU time. That is okay and you need to get stuff done ya know. Hope this helps a little there are plenty of moms out there in the same boat. Take care. LEAH

Hi T.

Of course he likes TV, both of my kids do too. They are 3 1/2 and 1. Sometimes I have to remind myself to turn it off and do something else with them too. As for the 2 year old behavior, sometimes it does just seem so much easier to avoid other activities which frustrate you the parent, but we have all had children eat crayons and they all mark on the walls. Just tell him no and eventually he will catch on, it will take some time. He is exploring and learning, my oldest still on occassion writes on the walls, he also takes a wet sponge and cleans it off when I find it, because I make him clean his mess. You could give him sidewalk chalk and go outside and let him create that way, go for walks, play with cars, build with blocks. You should also give him some activities to do on his own, he is not too young to learn to spend some time occupying himself with activities. You'll need him to be able to play quietly on his own for short periods of time once that baby comes. For my son, cars and trains have been great for him to occupy himself with for almost 2 years now. BUT, if worse comes to worse and you need to get something done and can't occupy him - turn on his movie and get your dinner made!

Do not feel bad if you turn on the tv to get something done around the house. Just do not leave it on for hours. He will get over it. Kids eat crayons. Sounds like our guy needs something more tactile than crayons. Have you tried finger painting? Really let him get messy outside with it. My daughters love doing things that seem naughty like covering themselves in paint or mud. I love disney. Your boy could want worse...

Don't sweat it. There is so much pressure to turn off the tv and do something, but when you are pregnant things slide. I was the same way and my girls are fine. Kids do not need to be happy all the time. If he is mad you turn the tv off, tough. Keep in mind you are the adult and in charge. On that note, it is also up to you to provide things to do. Honestly, the simpler the better. We like to make play dough (can give you my recipe if you like), finger paint, run around like very loud monsters, play hide and seek...be creative. Teach him how to make a fort or involve him in food preparation. Just don't let him know he is getting to you. Good luck and congratulations on the upcoming baby!

hi T.
Try a new show called Word World. its on PBs kids. we rented it from REDBOX, since its not on very often with our service.
good luck
T.

Hi T.! One Disney movie a day while you are fixing dinner or doing laundry is not a sin! Have you tried the Noggin channel? On Comcast it is channel 148 the two boys (1 & 5 yrs old) I babysit really enjoy the programing (designed for pre-schoolers and toddlers) and there are no real commercials! They don't sit and watch it all the time, just when the music or a story line catches their attention. My girls watched Disney movies all the time while they were growing up and it didn't hurt them at all! Lots of craft things can be done as he gets a bit older and able to follow directions better, just keep trying and look for those washable art supplies! Best wishes!

Hi, T.,

I have a similar situation with my 2 year old girl who loves TV. I do try to reduce it, though she definitely watches a good chunk of TV per day (early mornings usually for us).

A suggestion that's helped me reduce her dinner prep time TV intake, if you're interested:

For her 2nd birthday, I requested that my husband and I invest in a kitchen helper stool. It puts her up at the counter in a structure that she cannot get down from by herself, and then I give her dried lentils, beans, etc, with cupcake tin, mixing bowl, measuring cups, funnel, you get the idea, for her to play with. I mix it up by rotating the tools I give her periodically. It can get messy, but that's why I only use dried things. Also, if there's anything I can let her do to help with dinner prep (pour in a spice, water, etc) she gets very excited about helping. Even a healthy pre-dinner snack up there works some nights (and can get a vegetable into her system before we've even started dinner!).

I can keep her occupied up there for the majority of my dinner prep time, at least a couple of times per week. So I've probably gone from 4 nights of TV during dinner prep time to maybe 1 or 2, which is an improvement I feel good about. Also it's starting to turn dinner prep time into kind of a routine for us, a time that we share, which I also feel good about.

I have also heard that integrating them into the kitchen at a young age, finding jobs for them, ways they can help and be a part of the kitchen-scene, is very good developmentally for them.

Below are links to 2 products I found (be warned: they are expensive, that's why it had to wait to be a birthday gift). We bought the kitchen helper and really like it so far. It is well made, adjustable as she grows, and I expect to make use of it for years (and maybe future siblings!) to come.

http://mystepstool.com/kitchen_helper.htm
http://mystepstool.com/learning_tower.htm

Best wishes to you!

Do two things for your sanity-#1): Step up the discipline and do not allow the terrible twos. Enforce your discipline when he eats crayons or does anything else he's not supposed to. Step up the fun and good times when he's behaving so the black and white boundary between trouble and fun is clear. It won't take long for him to learn if you're firm and consistent. As a reward, here's #2): Don't feel bad about putting a movie in while you're cooking etc. Clump a bunch of chores together if you're allowing the whole movie to run. Discipline is part of the attention he needs, so if you're playing with him and teaching him how to behave all the time, take a break and pop in a movie when you need to as your reward.
I would "misplace" the disney one sometimes and get some educational ones in there so you have a mix going on. Or not. Treat yourself!

Don't be hard on yourself for needing time to get things done. The right Disney movie is just fine. On the other hand you sound as if YOU don't love this idea. As for dinner, though 2 seems young, have him help out. He can put ingredients in a salad, he can mix pasta to get it ready ( sure, its an old family secret, mixing pasta. :) ), he can pour the marinade over cold food..... I also noticed another comment that you made about playing with him, that he always ends up doing something "naughty". Naughty is a bit relative. 2 Year olds still put things in their mouth. Not a great habit, but far from naughty. Try a little redirection and redefining what you feel is naughty so that you do not feel that you have to discipline so much. It also sounds to me like there are limitation issues. While 2 can be a tough year, the way to get along is to make clear, concise rules. Your son needs to know what is expected and that crying will not change that. When movie time is over it is over. If he has a tantrum, that is ok, he is mad. Make sure that he is safe and let him have it. When he is done acknowledge that he was mad and give him other suggestions on things to do when he is mad ( go to a quiet place, color, jump up and down...) Though he will not fully understand at first he will get the idea that he cannot scream to get his way BUT he can be disappointed and what a great mommy you are for understanding him.

As for occupying him, try getting Disney toys such as coloring books, dolls, legos...

B. Davis

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It is so funny to see you post twice in one day things I can TOTALLY relate too.

When my 6yo was 2 we could not afford cable so we didn't have it. He was the original disney kid. They teach alot of empathy more than anything else and my guy is sooooo sensitive (in a good way). We watched "Mee-mo" About 5 hundred thousand times. We also switched it up with other ones but he really only wanted to watch movies and play with toys on the floor.

Now 4 years later he is always outside playing and he is so smart! I think that it all goes back to wether you let the tv babysit or raise you kids. I use it to babysit my kids while I do other important things like cooking and laundry. Making the time to "eat crayons" with your son is important but everyone being happy and sane is important too. I am sure that your worry about making sure you are doing the right thing is an indication that you are doing the right thing.

I also think that repitition is good for their brains it definatly helps with memorization. Just wait until he is repeating lines from the movie to you (a favorite past time in our house).

Oh and here is one little bit of advice from the trenches, don't let anyone else pick the movies. My husband thought that "dumb and dumber" was just a funny movie until I caught them watching it and had a bird! Not funny then but now that I look back on it it was a rookie mistake that we never saw coming!
Good luck to you
Cia

Just a note to let you know you are not alone. I have 2 kids, my son is almost 3 and my daughter will be 2 in October. When I wake up I put the TV on and turn it off at bedtime. I need the noise behind me. There are no TV's in any of the bedrooms and only 1 in the house, but it is always on - 9 times out of 10 with my son in front of it. As long as you try to keep it educational I think your all right