My 2 1/2 Year Old Daughter Wants Bottles and Pacies for Her Birthday

Updated on September 13, 2009
V.K. asks from Roseville, CA
4 answers

My daughter will be 3 this November. She was a breastfed baby and never even liked bottles back then (or pacies). Recently she has been telling me that she wants bottles and pacies for her Birthday. She will take her baby dolls bottles and pacies and put them in her mouth (I have put them away) and do things like that. I try to tell her that she's too big to keep wanting these things.. she tells me that she's a "pretend baby". I just don't know what to do. I don't buy them for her but not sure how to get her to understand that they aren't for her.

Any suggestions?

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J.K.

answers from Sacramento on

HI V.,

Have there been any changes in your daughter's life that might make her want more attention from you? Is there a new baby around that she sees getting attention?

I wouldn't worry too much about it, to be honest. I wouldn't buy her any for her birthday, but you could let her have the ones that are in the house. Sometimes kids play situations that they can't really express in words. Maybe you should role play with her when she does this. For example when she says she's a pretend baby cuddle her in your arms and say "are you my special little baby girl?" and then shift it into how she's a big girl... You can say "look at all this hair you have baby!! Look at all these teeth you have baby!! Can you clap you hands...? I think you're the most special big girl I know!!" It doesn't have to be an elaborate thing just a few minutes of special time for her.

I think it's great that she's so resourceful to try to get what she needs!

Good luck!

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R.W.

answers from San Francisco on

It sounds like she is no longer breastfed because you said "back then".
I would guess that she is just interested is the social playacting that girls often do (playing school, playing house, tea parties,etc.)and wants to act out a sort of baby role play. When she tells you she is a "pretend baby" that sounds like she is telling you that she does understand that she is not actually a baby, and just wants to pretend.
I can understand that you would feel like this is regressive, and might want to discourage it. You might try telling her it is bad for her teeth, which I know at least thumb sucking can be... or you could try to get her interested in a different kind of pretend game (maybe by playing WITH her).
It's probably really harmless. She may have become interested after seeing babies and toddlers with bottles or pacifiers, and feeling curious because she never had them herself.

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P.W.

answers from San Francisco on

Let her have them. They won't hurt her. I let my youngest son have his bottle until he was 4, mostly because I was worn out from three kids, but he's now 15 and perfectly well-adjusted, and his teeth are fine. If she wants to be a "pretend baby" for a while, indulge her. Coming from my vantage point, when my kids are all almost all grown, that is so CUTE!!! She IS a baby!!

I promise you she'll outgrow them before Kindergarten.

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G.B.

answers from San Francisco on

If It were me, I wouldn't spend the money indulging this. We are in hard financial times and things are going to get harder.
I would just kindly say , "no honey, were not buying you infant formula bottles, because you don't drink infant formula and buying things is expensive and we have to watch our money. If you want to pretent to be a baby drinking a bottle you can use the doll bottles you have now and pretend with those." That is where I would leave it.
Does she have a baby doll that can pee? Those can be fun, she can feed them and see the pee in the diaper.
I dont think the pretending is a problem but I wouldn't buy real bottles specifically for play.

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