Moving to a New House - Glen Allen,VA

Updated on March 16, 2007
A.G. asks from Glen Allen, VA
7 answers

My almost 4 year old daughter and I will be moving to a new house at the end of the month. Since we are leaving the only home she has ever known, coupled with the fact that Mommy & Daddy are no longer going to be married, I'm worried about how unsettling this move will be for her. What can I do to ensure this transition goes as smooth as possible and doesn't turn her world completely upside down?

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J.

answers from Columbia on

A.,
I hope that all the advice that you have recieved was useful. I do have some of my own that I would like to share with you. A few years ago, my son (now seven) and I moved into another house and I am a single mother too. His father and I did not work out, but we came up with a great plan. We sent my son to his grandparens for the day. While he was visiting, I arranged his room exactly like it was in the old house. I mean to the exact placing of his bed, entertainment center, bears, toys, the whole nine yards. I must admit that when I finally picked him up, he wondered around the house and saw his room, just the way that it was (like in the old house)he felt comfortable, as if we were living there for years. His whole room was completely unpacked and organized. I think that it really worked out because the rest of the house was partially set up (boxes scattered) and my child could just go into his room and play without any waiting (for you to unpack her toys or set up her bed). I hope that this may be beneficial to you and your child.

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S.J.

answers from Norfolk on

Do everything you can to make the transition as easy as possible for her. Try to make it exciting for her. Make her bedroom a special place for her to go to. Try to explain it all to her in a way that she can understand everything that is going on.
I don't know the circumstances, but don't say anything negative about her daddy or what is going on. Make it all as positive as you can. Good luck to you and your daughter.

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T.W.

answers from Greensboro on

We just moved a few months ago into our new house. We stayed with my aunt the first night because the air wasn't on and the house was nothing more than boxes. we put our family room together first and then the kids rooms. It made it easier on the 9 year old, but the then 17 month old was just so upset with all the boxes. We just got all the boxes cleaned out as soon as possible. Even though everything wasn't in it's right place to begin with, having the boxes gone helped alot. After the first week, we was just happy as a lark. We also talked about the new house alot before moving and all the new things we could do after we moved. Good luck on your new house. I am sure she will be just fine, kids adjust better than adults most times. Take care!

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V.M.

answers from York on

A.,
It's amaizing how many couples are spliting now a days inclluding myself. I had kids involved one your daughters age and one older. My son was 5 and and daughter was 7. What I did was make them feel like there picking out the new house and the bedrooms they wanted. Then they helped me decorate it and where to put things "was not excateally where I would have put it " HAHAH but I rearranged later on.
Make her feel that this is a new adventure and maybe put a new stuffed animial on the floor inside the new door then forst time you enter it and she will be surprised. mybe with a poem on it saying " I need a new home can I live with you and you take care of me? I would love to have a such a pretty friend like you!
Silly I know but she is a little girl.
Just make her feel like she has ownership in the house, in her room and in some decisions and it will be fine.

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A.D.

answers from Charlotte on

We have 5 children and have moved quite a few times for my husbands job! We have always found that if we put the childrens rooms together and the family room (tv and such) back right away, the first night you are there, the kids seem to feel comfortable because their usual surrondings are in place. I wish you the best! Good Luck!

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J.S.

answers from Wilmington on

I agree with the advise that says involve your daughter in everything. We recently moved from a home where both my boys (ages 7 and 2) pretty much have lived most of their lives. (Before that, we moved when my older son was three and when he was 1 1/2...we are military and have moved a few times).
We told them about the big truck that would come and move their things. We let them help pack boxes for their rooms and told them the big truck would bring them to the new house.
Don't under estimate how smart these little one's are. TALK to her. About everything. And let her know that you want her to ask you any questions she has or to tell you how she is feeling.
I am not so sure that trying to duplicate your old house is a good idea. She is going to know it is a new place. She knows what your belongings look like. As long as they are there, she will feel at home. Let her "help" decide where to place her bed in her new room. If you can paint...let her "help" pick a color. (I use the word "help" since we have been given some pretty funny requests....like placing a bed in front of a closet or my 7 year old telling me he wants 7 different colored stripes in his room. We narrowed it down to 2. LOL)
I have worried each time we have moved. I really never realized how much I would worry about my kids mental health. I mean I knew that I would always worry about their happiness, security, etc..., but I never knew how much I would worry about how situations would effect them or make them feel. So I completely understand.
Although I am not a single parent...there has been many times when we have moved that my husband has been deployed and was not with us once we go got there and was gone for months afterwards. Children are resiliant!!! They really are. If they know they are loved and that everything is going to be ok....they really will be ok.
I hope this move goes smoothly for all of you.
Best wishes,
J.

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S.G.

answers from Savannah on

Talk to her about it, be excited about it. Make it a big deal!! My daughter was almost 4 when I moved over 900 miles away to be with my hubby. She was leaving everything she knew to live in a strange house with a semi strange guy. I had her help me pack her room, had her pick out a few toys to play with during the long drive. When we got there, there were two empty bedrooms and I let her pick out which one she wanted. And when we started to unpack I let her help me decide where she wanted her bed (only gave her 2 options) and where she wanted her dresser (2 options) and had her help me put her things away. My hubby had already been living there for a few weeks so most of the house was already set up with the stuff he had brought but I just tried to involved her in as much as possible. If she missed her daddy, I called him so they could talk, same with other family members. She adjusted pretty well I think and we've moved 2 more times since and are getting ready to move again here in a few months. Kids are pretty resilient, just try to keep her involved in the process as much as possible.

Good luck to the two of you!!

S.

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