Martial Arts

I feel you should start him now. My sister and I were both 3 when we started. I couldn't think of any other way to help with self control. My son started when he was 3 and my daughter will start this year. My son is now 6 and it has helped him so much. We have never had any problems with him in school or out of school trying to use this skill towards anyone. They learn when to use it and when not to.

Hi V.,

Have you ever heard of Poekoelan? It's a rare form of martial arts that has three locations here in Portland. I know a few people who train in it and absolutely LOVE it. Poekoelan is based on the movements of four animals, the snake, the monkey, the crane, and the tiger. It is entirely focused on self-defense. They have a program for 3-5 year olds called "Little Monkeys" where (the impression that I get) the kids play in a jungle gym based on the movements of the three animals. We're planning on taking my son to it when he turns 3 so he can start interacting with other kids and also have something in common with his dad, who trains there also. The SE Portland center has a great website, www.onewithheart.com. I know they also teach a lot about meditation, patience, and working as a team. It seems like a great and amazing program for anyone.

Regards,
A.

hey V., i have a 3.5 yr old girl and she has been in tae kwondo since just before she turned 3, total of 8 months now...i think it is great, it has not made her more aggressive at all and it has actually helped me a bit when it comes to dicipline. she goes to ATA, american tae kwondo association, they are very child oriented and at least at our school they work so well with the kids, they are national, im in arizona right now but am coming back home to seaatle at the end of may, if you go to thereweb site u can find a school in ur area. they will have you bring your son in and evaluate to see if he is ready, its a little spendy but like i said i love it and my daughter would rather go to "karate" than to pre school. hope that helped u.....

Venessa
HI,
My daughters go to Kung Fu Martial arts. They are 5 and 7. The 7yo doesn't like it so much so when our year contract is up we are going to find another avenune for her. My husband has been going him self for 2 years and He started taking the girl last summer which was nice as a father/daughter thing. After the girls had their class they would sit and color while their dad had his class. There was a little dragons class but i'm not sure if it was 3 or 4yo.

I think it was a great experience, and weither or not they want to continue, it is something they had experience in. I did like the instructor and he worked really well w/ children, even mine. Even our son who is 2 is mimicking the girls ha ha ha it is cute. Good luck w/ your choice.

My own personal experience is that my children don't start extra-curricular activities until 2nd grade. I believe that kids are too over-scheduled and especially in my situation my kids really needed to get "school" first before throwing in anything else into the mix. However, my children attend a charter school and have music activities. 3 of my 4 children are now over that age and 2 of them do activities and one of them does not because he still needs to concentrate on school.
My oldest takes several dance classes and is really advanced in his school studies, so I think I made the right decision for my family.
I think you'd be better off registering your son for preschool or headstart if preschool isn't in your budget. That is a great way to get some extra energy out and make it productive, plus get him ready for school! Even if your children attend daycare, it's better if you can get them into a different preschool. I've taught both: preschool and daycare (and headstart for that matter!)
When I taught kindergarten I had a child who was taking Taikwondo (sp?) and he was constantly doing "moves" and pretend fighting with other kids. When I discussed this with his parents they told me that if the "master" knew, that the child would have to sit out or have disciplinary consequences.
So... if you choose to do something like that, really interview the teachers and ask them what would happen if they used their new found knowledge inappropriately.
Hope this helps! Good luck!

I don't agree at all with your husband! During class, he'll learn discipline, and self control. He may learn to fight better, but he won't be as agressive or likely to use his new skills, since you have found a better outlet for him. Try having your husband go with you to talk with the instructors, and maybe that way, he'll feel better about the whole thing.
Good luck, I think that sounds like a great way to keep your boy occupied.
A.

My 5 year old son is taking a class called "Little Ninjas" it is taught by a JuJitSu instructor but the class is not agressive at all and they start kids as young as 3. Its more about confidence, focus and dicipline. They also learn about things like balance and fitness. I put my son in the class because he is very large for his age and that made him rather awkward. He is also very tender-hearted and he was starting to get picked on a bit by his classmates. Since we have started his confidence in himself has gone way up and he is so proud of his accomplishments. His teacher has even commented to me about his focus in class. Most places will let you observe a class or two before you sign up, maybe you and your husband should go watch (without your son so he doesnt get his hopes up if you decide against it)and see if its right for you.

I put both my children in Karate at 8 and 5. Not only did it not make them fight more, but it taught them dicipline. They are taught you only defend yourself, never take the initive. It also helped to rid themselves of access energy and by the time they ate dinner, and bathed, they wanted sleep. In my opinion, it was one of the best childhood activities my children had. They are almost all grown now, but when we look back at the photos, trophies and belts, it is always a good memory.

I had my son in martial arts...big mistake. He started kicking kids in class, tripping teachers...And now, two years later, he still throws punches and kicks, although not with the intention of hurting anyone, just showing us what he can do. I have also had to work hard to teach him that if there was a bad guy he could not just "kick" him.

We have twin boys. We are going to do the same. We are going to put them in to Tae Kwon DO. They need to learn the self discipline. We have a nephew who has A. D. D. He went from a wild 5 year old on drugs (medication) to a straight A student. Who loves school and sports. His parents said that he has learned self control and self discipline. It has impressed us so much, That we are putting our Twin boys in it. And maybe our oldest daughter. We have checked in to it. And they have told us that they do not even teach them aggressive moves. That is for old kids who show self control and self discipline. I don't know about the other forms of martial arts. We have only looked in to Tae Kwon Do. Hope this helped. Good luck.

I'm not sure what city you live in but there is a really good Tae Kwon Do studio in Sumner. My two little brothers went there as kids and so did my mom and my friend. They all loved it. The teacher is a really nice guy. If I remember correctly, he's actually the owner of the Sumner Tae Kwon Do. It wasn't really something that I personally was interested in doing but I was there all the time watching them. I think that it's a really good experience for kids because it teaches discipline and self control as well as self defense. They definantly don't just teach them how to fight but they teach them to know when it's appropriate, like at tournaments or if you were to get attacked on the street by a stranger. Here's the address and phone number if your interested.

If your not in or near Sumner, I'm sure they can refer to someone.

15715 Main St E
Sumner, WA 98390
###-###-####

V.,

My 8 year old son is in taekwondo and loves it! I do believe it inspires confidence, respect, focus and the ability to defend one's self. There are classes for the 3 - 5 year old set. I have a five year old and have observed the other children in the classes who are 4 or 5 and a lot have trouble paying attention, respecting the teacher and understanding the priciples. Some are very good however. I would recommend waiting until he is in elementary school, IMO. It is also pretty expensive so you might want to make sure he's getting everything out of it he can (by waiting until he's older).

B.

My husband knows both aikido and kempo. Akido is all about defense and using your opponents moves against them. So it isn't teaching then to be aggressive but to protect themselves. I am going to enroll my daughter in it. =D

My husband is a 2nd degree black belt and he said 5 is the best age and at home for 2 years keep him flexibal and work on his ame on kicking and punching.

My mother in law put him in about 8-9 and it taught him to press his control on how to avoid fights it will give him stranth in mind and body.It all on a good tranner.

hope this helps are daughter is going to be in martial arts before she can date.she is 3 now and doing well on ame and learning to control temper.

T.

Venessa,

Hello there. I have been in the same shoes as you. I did Tae-kwon-do for a number of years before I got married and had kids, and always wanted to incorporate martial arts in our family. Hopefuly someday we'll get to do that. But just research out the different karate institutes in your area. The "masters" in most of the institutes are very open with parents (especially if they are tapered more for younger children). They do teach the kids self control, and that violence is never the answer. When I was speaking with a "master" at one of our new dojos, he said that if a child uses his martial arts when it is not appropriate, he asks the parents to bring the children to him to further instruction and "discipline" if you will. Because they HAVE to learn from the person they look up to who is teaching them this new sport...when it is okay to use it. They also teach what to do if an adult graps them, say a kidnapper, and that no matter how long you've been in karate...you can not fight off an adult. I think that is HUGE for little guys to hear. Because they think now that their in karate, all of the sudden they are invisible, and can fight like Jackie Chan! :) Sometimes I think karate could be the answer to a violent child, or a child with violent tendencies. This will give him an avenue to express thet behavior in a safe environment that will teach him/her how to use it respectfuly, and in a controled manner. My son can tend to have violent tendencies...and if we could afford martial arts currently I would put him in without hisitation. I think it would be good for him. Anyway...Good luck!

Actually I agree with you, this is a REALLY good idea to get them involved young. I grew up in the Martial Arts, and later taught young children, and loved every minute of it.

If your husband is worried about agression, he does have a concern there, but I would recommend looking into the more "Defensive" martial arts, like Aikido (if you're in the greater Seattle/Redmond Area, look into aikido kids) I grew up in "Jukido" which was a combination of Aikido and Judo. (Jukido - The way of gentle flowing power) And let me tell you, this is GREAT stuff for kids. Because it requires an agressive action AGAINST them, before they can do harm. it's really hard to just go up and throw someone. :)

Judo/Aikido are very "Defensive" types of Martial arts, because it teaches a defensive posture, how to fall properly without getting hurt (which is good for all kids). and like what I learned growing up, is that "Size doesn't matter", and it allows someone smaller to utilize the motion and agression of someone bigger against them. (The bigger they are, the harder they fall).

Instead of Blocking a Punch (physical connection) Aikido and Judo avoids and redirects that motion -- I.E. the "Bad guy" is doing all the work. :) Generally speaking Punches and Kicks aren't taught, but things more intuned to kids, (what hurts the other, but not themselves) like wrist locks, arm bars and such. Nothing quite like watching a 6 year old boy move a 32 year old adult around like a puppet. :)

And on the self Esteem side, I find these types of Martial Arts amazing for kids, because they become confident knowing that should someone try to hurt them, they will be just fine, and can deal with it. That they can fall down or get knocked down without breaking something. and a child will "Walk taller and carry" themselves with confidence, which usually scares away most bullies and bad-guy types anyway.

The art "Jukido" that I grew up in, (I got my black belt at twelve) also had a complimentary Karate program but you couldn't learn those techniques until you were 12. Because it does require control, and learning how to punch and Kick can be agressive. I didn't understand the limitations at the time, but when I started teaching (To put myself through college) I figured it out. :)

If you want, I could always suggest some good schools or instructors in the area.

I was in martial arts as a kid as were my brothers we did not fight more at all in fact it does not teach fighting it teaches self defense and discipline I think that you should take your husband to watch some classes and research the different choices that you have because there are many forms of martial arts and some are more fighting oriented than others but i think that it is a great choice in fact I have one brother who is more prone to wanting to play fight than the others and he was never in martial arts but he did play football and soccar:) they are much more violent sports.

My 6 year old son is in Tae Kwon Do down here in Puyallup, and there are two 4 year olds in his class (that's the youngest they take kids there). My son loves it! He's a very friendly boy who in October, when he started, always wanted to talk in school or play around. TKD has taught him self control and TONS of respect. At his first parent/teacher conference even his teacher noticed that something had changed around October. And like others have said before, it's wonderful for their confidence and self esteem. My husband and I see it as the best sport we could have put our son in and plan on enrolling our youngest as soon as he's 4.

V.,
I think martial arts is a great way to learn both discipline and self defense. 3 might be a little young, but by 5 he would be perfect. I have both of my boys in martial arts and they really enjoy it. Mine are 10 and 12 yrs old. My 12 year old we got started in Karate at about 8 and he took off from their. He is now doing tae kwon do which focus's on discipline and self control as part of its teaching. My boys are allowed to spar in class, but get in trouble for fighting at other times. My younger one did go through a phase of being a little more aggressive and required some extra effort in channeling his newly aquired skill, but he is doing fine now. They also do weapons training now which is an aspect their school requires them to get invited into after they have shown good discipline in other aspects, and my younger one does get his weapons taken away at times for goofing around, but again it is the personality of the child. I don't know of any of the kids in their class who have issues with fighting. It really helps their self confidence which in itself helps deter fighting. Hope this helps. My husband and I just decided to join tae kwon do with the kids and it is a great work out for us as well. They have family classes where the kids and parents can go together. Their are some younger kids that go to the family class, like 6 or 7, but they are usually higher belts. the lower belts may do better in the childrens classes.
J.

Self control, self defense, and physical activity is what he will gain in martial arts. Our kids were in Tae Kwon Do. They are now 24 and 21. They did learn to "fight better." But, they learned to talk things out. If you look around your area for a really good martial arts instructor, one who will teach self control, you will find that you have a well rounded child in later life.

My son, 24, is a Marine and he is a 1st degree black belt. He is a top defender in his company when they have cometitions. He is in top physical condition, with about a 3% body fat. He love the physical part of Tae Kwon Do. It helped him when he got into high school too. He learned that fighting didn't solve everything.

My daughter, 21, can defend herself against anyone. She is a black belt too. I never have to worry about her on a date or out in the world on her own. She is also a very independent person.

Both of my kids had no problem with public speaking or talking to their instructors when there was a problem in class. They were both active in basketball, track, and softball.

Utilizing this as a time for family may strengthen your bond with your kids. Your husband may benefit from the physical activity and the accomplishment of moving to the next belt.

Make sure when you are looking for a "school" you talk with all the instructors to ensure that you agree with their phylosophies. A good school should not be worried about making money. A good class should run aroun $35 to $50 a month depending on where the class is held and how much they have to pay for rent. Don't look at a school for just the "flashy" looks. Sometimes the best ones are held in someones garage.

Good luck and let me know where you are located and I can maybe help you find a school in your area.

I took karate in high school. Although I didn't participate with children, i can tell you the response that adult men had. I was almost a brown belt when i graduated high school. Most men when they first joined acted really macho, but didnt' know anything about karate, so it was easy to get them in a hold...as they learned, they at first seemed a bit overzealous to use their newly acquired moves, but they never used it outside the class. I know children will be a little different because they want to show off to their buddys, etc. but as a person learns more and more karate, more wisdom follows. It actually has quite the opposite effect that I think your husband is expecting. It is true that it will teach your son to fight better, BUT it will also teach your son when it IS okay to fight and when it is NOT okay to fight. One of the first things taught is that you only use karate as a means of self defense. This discipline is normally followed pretty strictly even though children cannot be controlled outside the dojo. Kids that learn karate are actually less likely to be involved in fights because 1) they know how to do it, 2) they get to do it every week in class, and 3) they know when they don't need to do it. Most dojos will kick you out for using your karate to harm others who didn't first attempt to harm you. Hope this helps. I have a 2 1/2 year old son and i would like to get him involved in classes when he is ready. Just make sure not to start your children too early. If they are not coordinated enough or able to handle the discipline, it can be very frustrating.