Martial Arts

I took karate in high school. Although I didn't participate with children, i can tell you the response that adult men had. I was almost a brown belt when i graduated high school. Most men when they first joined acted really macho, but didnt' know anything about karate, so it was easy to get them in a hold...as they learned, they at first seemed a bit overzealous to use their newly acquired moves, but they never used it outside the class. I know children will be a little different because they want to show off to their buddys, etc. but as a person learns more and more karate, more wisdom follows. It actually has quite the opposite effect that I think your husband is expecting. It is true that it will teach your son to fight better, BUT it will also teach your son when it IS okay to fight and when it is NOT okay to fight. One of the first things taught is that you only use karate as a means of self defense. This discipline is normally followed pretty strictly even though children cannot be controlled outside the dojo. Kids that learn karate are actually less likely to be involved in fights because 1) they know how to do it, 2) they get to do it every week in class, and 3) they know when they don't need to do it. Most dojos will kick you out for using your karate to harm others who didn't first attempt to harm you. Hope this helps. I have a 2 1/2 year old son and i would like to get him involved in classes when he is ready. Just make sure not to start your children too early. If they are not coordinated enough or able to handle the discipline, it can be very frustrating.

Self control, self defense, and physical activity is what he will gain in martial arts. Our kids were in Tae Kwon Do. They are now 24 and 21. They did learn to "fight better." But, they learned to talk things out. If you look around your area for a really good martial arts instructor, one who will teach self control, you will find that you have a well rounded child in later life.

My son, 24, is a Marine and he is a 1st degree black belt. He is a top defender in his company when they have cometitions. He is in top physical condition, with about a 3% body fat. He love the physical part of Tae Kwon Do. It helped him when he got into high school too. He learned that fighting didn't solve everything.

My daughter, 21, can defend herself against anyone. She is a black belt too. I never have to worry about her on a date or out in the world on her own. She is also a very independent person.

Both of my kids had no problem with public speaking or talking to their instructors when there was a problem in class. They were both active in basketball, track, and softball.

Utilizing this as a time for family may strengthen your bond with your kids. Your husband may benefit from the physical activity and the accomplishment of moving to the next belt.

Make sure when you are looking for a "school" you talk with all the instructors to ensure that you agree with their phylosophies. A good school should not be worried about making money. A good class should run aroun $35 to $50 a month depending on where the class is held and how much they have to pay for rent. Don't look at a school for just the "flashy" looks. Sometimes the best ones are held in someones garage.

Good luck and let me know where you are located and I can maybe help you find a school in your area.

V.,
I think martial arts is a great way to learn both discipline and self defense. 3 might be a little young, but by 5 he would be perfect. I have both of my boys in martial arts and they really enjoy it. Mine are 10 and 12 yrs old. My 12 year old we got started in Karate at about 8 and he took off from their. He is now doing tae kwon do which focus's on discipline and self control as part of its teaching. My boys are allowed to spar in class, but get in trouble for fighting at other times. My younger one did go through a phase of being a little more aggressive and required some extra effort in channeling his newly aquired skill, but he is doing fine now. They also do weapons training now which is an aspect their school requires them to get invited into after they have shown good discipline in other aspects, and my younger one does get his weapons taken away at times for goofing around, but again it is the personality of the child. I don't know of any of the kids in their class who have issues with fighting. It really helps their self confidence which in itself helps deter fighting. Hope this helps. My husband and I just decided to join tae kwon do with the kids and it is a great work out for us as well. They have family classes where the kids and parents can go together. Their are some younger kids that go to the family class, like 6 or 7, but they are usually higher belts. the lower belts may do better in the childrens classes.
J.

My 6 year old son is in Tae Kwon Do down here in Puyallup, and there are two 4 year olds in his class (that's the youngest they take kids there). My son loves it! He's a very friendly boy who in October, when he started, always wanted to talk in school or play around. TKD has taught him self control and TONS of respect. At his first parent/teacher conference even his teacher noticed that something had changed around October. And like others have said before, it's wonderful for their confidence and self esteem. My husband and I see it as the best sport we could have put our son in and plan on enrolling our youngest as soon as he's 4.

My husband knows both aikido and kempo. Akido is all about defense and using your opponents moves against them. So it isn't teaching then to be aggressive but to protect themselves. I am going to enroll my daughter in it. =D

V.,

My 8 year old son is in taekwondo and loves it! I do believe it inspires confidence, respect, focus and the ability to defend one's self. There are classes for the 3 - 5 year old set. I have a five year old and have observed the other children in the classes who are 4 or 5 and a lot have trouble paying attention, respecting the teacher and understanding the priciples. Some are very good however. I would recommend waiting until he is in elementary school, IMO. It is also pretty expensive so you might want to make sure he's getting everything out of it he can (by waiting until he's older).

B.

I feel you should start him now. My sister and I were both 3 when we started. I couldn't think of any other way to help with self control. My son started when he was 3 and my daughter will start this year. My son is now 6 and it has helped him so much. We have never had any problems with him in school or out of school trying to use this skill towards anyone. They learn when to use it and when not to.

We have twin boys. We are going to do the same. We are going to put them in to Tae Kwon DO. They need to learn the self discipline. We have a nephew who has A. D. D. He went from a wild 5 year old on drugs (medication) to a straight A student. Who loves school and sports. His parents said that he has learned self control and self discipline. It has impressed us so much, That we are putting our Twin boys in it. And maybe our oldest daughter. We have checked in to it. And they have told us that they do not even teach them aggressive moves. That is for old kids who show self control and self discipline. I don't know about the other forms of martial arts. We have only looked in to Tae Kwon Do. Hope this helped. Good luck.

I put both my children in Karate at 8 and 5. Not only did it not make them fight more, but it taught them dicipline. They are taught you only defend yourself, never take the initive. It also helped to rid themselves of access energy and by the time they ate dinner, and bathed, they wanted sleep. In my opinion, it was one of the best childhood activities my children had. They are almost all grown now, but when we look back at the photos, trophies and belts, it is always a good memory.

My 5 year old son is taking a class called "Little Ninjas" it is taught by a JuJitSu instructor but the class is not agressive at all and they start kids as young as 3. Its more about confidence, focus and dicipline. They also learn about things like balance and fitness. I put my son in the class because he is very large for his age and that made him rather awkward. He is also very tender-hearted and he was starting to get picked on a bit by his classmates. Since we have started his confidence in himself has gone way up and he is so proud of his accomplishments. His teacher has even commented to me about his focus in class. Most places will let you observe a class or two before you sign up, maybe you and your husband should go watch (without your son so he doesnt get his hopes up if you decide against it)and see if its right for you.

I don't agree at all with your husband! During class, he'll learn discipline, and self control. He may learn to fight better, but he won't be as agressive or likely to use his new skills, since you have found a better outlet for him. Try having your husband go with you to talk with the instructors, and maybe that way, he'll feel better about the whole thing.
Good luck, I think that sounds like a great way to keep your boy occupied.
A.

My own personal experience is that my children don't start extra-curricular activities until 2nd grade. I believe that kids are too over-scheduled and especially in my situation my kids really needed to get "school" first before throwing in anything else into the mix. However, my children attend a charter school and have music activities. 3 of my 4 children are now over that age and 2 of them do activities and one of them does not because he still needs to concentrate on school.
My oldest takes several dance classes and is really advanced in his school studies, so I think I made the right decision for my family.
I think you'd be better off registering your son for preschool or headstart if preschool isn't in your budget. That is a great way to get some extra energy out and make it productive, plus get him ready for school! Even if your children attend daycare, it's better if you can get them into a different preschool. I've taught both: preschool and daycare (and headstart for that matter!)
When I taught kindergarten I had a child who was taking Taikwondo (sp?) and he was constantly doing "moves" and pretend fighting with other kids. When I discussed this with his parents they told me that if the "master" knew, that the child would have to sit out or have disciplinary consequences.
So... if you choose to do something like that, really interview the teachers and ask them what would happen if they used their new found knowledge inappropriately.
Hope this helps! Good luck!

Venessa
HI,
My daughters go to Kung Fu Martial arts. They are 5 and 7. The 7yo doesn't like it so much so when our year contract is up we are going to find another avenune for her. My husband has been going him self for 2 years and He started taking the girl last summer which was nice as a father/daughter thing. After the girls had their class they would sit and color while their dad had his class. There was a little dragons class but i'm not sure if it was 3 or 4yo.

I think it was a great experience, and weither or not they want to continue, it is something they had experience in. I did like the instructor and he worked really well w/ children, even mine. Even our son who is 2 is mimicking the girls ha ha ha it is cute. Good luck w/ your choice.

hey V., i have a 3.5 yr old girl and she has been in tae kwondo since just before she turned 3, total of 8 months now...i think it is great, it has not made her more aggressive at all and it has actually helped me a bit when it comes to dicipline. she goes to ATA, american tae kwondo association, they are very child oriented and at least at our school they work so well with the kids, they are national, im in arizona right now but am coming back home to seaatle at the end of may, if you go to thereweb site u can find a school in ur area. they will have you bring your son in and evaluate to see if he is ready, its a little spendy but like i said i love it and my daughter would rather go to "karate" than to pre school. hope that helped u.....

Hi V.,

Have you ever heard of Poekoelan? It's a rare form of martial arts that has three locations here in Portland. I know a few people who train in it and absolutely LOVE it. Poekoelan is based on the movements of four animals, the snake, the monkey, the crane, and the tiger. It is entirely focused on self-defense. They have a program for 3-5 year olds called "Little Monkeys" where (the impression that I get) the kids play in a jungle gym based on the movements of the three animals. We're planning on taking my son to it when he turns 3 so he can start interacting with other kids and also have something in common with his dad, who trains there also. The SE Portland center has a great website, www.onewithheart.com. I know they also teach a lot about meditation, patience, and working as a team. It seems like a great and amazing program for anyone.

Regards,
A.