I need someone else's objective opinion . . .
Today my 6yr. old son was invited to a birthday party. That part is not unusual; but what is, is that he was invited today and the party is this Friday (09/11/09). Is it just me, or does anyone else think that this is really last minute? Especially considering that they want me to R.S.V.P. by tomorrow (09/10/09). It's a party for 3 brothers that live a couple of houses down from us. My son plays with them on a regular basis. But I'm wondering since we just got the invitation today, were they considering not inviting him and just decided to at the last minute? Or are they just last minute people? On top of that, the party is from 4:30pm to 9:30pm. I think that's odd too . . . a birthday party for 5 & 6 yr. olds on a Friday from 4:30 to 9:30pm????
What do you guys think? Am I over-reacting?
Thanks for your input everyone! Because there are so many parties, activities, etc. . . . for us, pretty much everything is planned in advance. Which is part of the reason why this had me thrown for a loop. There are 2 other kids birthday parties on our block this weekend . . . one is on Saturday and one is on Sunday. I got those invitations at least 2 weeks ago. I talked to the mom of the boys having their party tomorrow, and she said that because of the other birthday parties this weekend, she didn't know when to have theirs. I told her that my thought would have been to wait until next weekend. I had to do that with my youngest sons b-day party last month. We pushed it back a week because of all the other birthday parties going on. She said that would've been a good idea, because now she's having a party for 5 & 6 yr. olds that doesn't end until 9:30pm (no adults or other family members are attending - just kids). Because it was last minute (and I have so many other things to do Friday), I was just going to tell her that my son wouldn't be attending. But I didn't want his feelings to be hurt, or for him to feel excluded because he couldn't go. So unlike you Anne, for me it wasn't that cut and dry. I had a lot of things to consider. So the reasons DO matter . . .
I've sent out invitations that last-minute before... with three young kids it can get really crazy. I'm thinking that the wide range 4:30 to 9:30 is meant to be flexible since they realize people may already have have plans, and that going for a while would be fine. Good luck!
I'm giving this the side eyes because it is a little fishy. BUT....I think they realize this is last minute so they will understand if you decide not to have your child attend the party. If you can quick grab a gift or gifts though and want your son to attend then just go for it and try to let it go. Who cares what their reasoning is/was for the belated invite. People get busy, forget or just want to give the most for their kids and decided last minute they could invite one more. Who knows but the important thing is for your son to have some fun if you agree to it.
As far as the 9:30 - yeah it's a little late for a child's party. BUT....if you really don't mind your son being up a little later and don't mind picking him up that late then again....let it be. Or, you could just say that you need to grab him just a tad early and tell them what time you'll be back.
I was very good about planning ahead with my older kids, but now I almost need to wait until the last minute to make sure there aren't any schedule conflicts.
I usually call on the phone or email the invites about 5-7 days ahead of time. If it's a mom I talk to a lot, I tell them that I'm trying to come up with something and a tenative date.
On the flip side, I always have a spare gift laying around in case the same thing happens to me.
You don't have to stay until 9:30, you can say that you need to leave earlier if you feel like that's too late. If it's at a rental place, like Chuck E Cheese's, that might be the only time they could get. Like maybe the afternoons were already taken.
I agree with the others that said this seems to be a trend. The first couple of weeks of school are hectic and this party was most likely done at the last minute. I'd give them the benefit of the doubt here. Of course, say no if you don't want your boys to go, or say you'll pick them up at an earlier time.
For what it's worth, 9:30pm isn't so strange if they are later-to-bed people. My girls have some cousins who routinely go to bed past 10pm on the weekends - they also sleep in. My girls just can't stay up that late since they get up so early. Different strokes for different folks.
HI Lynn!
I just had my daughters bday party a few weeks ago on a Sunday and called everyone to let them know about it on Friday and Sat. We have been scrambling around because of the start of school and getting prepared that I never even sent out our invites... and I use the interent usually to do that! The weather also has not been cooperative so when I saw a good weather weekend I jumped at the chance since I definately did not want it in the house!
When I called people I was completely undertanding about people saying no.... there were a few who I thought would be able to who couldnt! We had only 12 people here and 2 of her friends since it was last minute planning! I blame myself only!
My guess for the times is because it is on a Friday night so it is extended for the adults and those who have to work late or travel a distance to and from work!
I bet she is just like me and was waiting on a good time for the weather! Friday is suppose to be a beautiful day! Do not sweat it especially if they are friends!
Blessings to you and yours!
I'm thinking, if he plays with them regularly, they may have just put a party together at the last minute. Yes, it is strange, however, I've had this happen to one of my children, too, and in my case, it really was a last minute decision for the family to even throw a party (my daughter was asked the morning of the event!) Especially given the fact that it is a "5 hour party on a Friday night"? Sounds like they are scrambling. I would be curious if this is ALL children or if it would be an adult family party, too. I've had "sleepless sleepovers" on a Friday for 8 year olds but, even then, it was a 4 hour party.
Even if your child was invited at the last minute - would you want to know that??? And, even if you did, you wouldn't be sharing that info with your son or, "just knowing the truth" could alter your opinion of your son's friends and their family. Sometimes ignorance is bliss, especially, if this is a neighbor and your son hangs with them on a regular basis. Some things just aren't worth knowing. However, I can see why it would raise an eyebrow, with you.
Good luck.
There are 2 things not mentioned. Both have happened to me. One is they were not sure if they could even have the party because of weather or even finances. The other is they thought they sent the invite but because things are so crazy, it didn't go out. I got a call for a party for a good friend of mine. She did not get my RSVP and wondered if we would be able to come. I didn't get an invite. She felt horrible and told me about it right then. We already had plans but stopped by for a few minutes. If you want your child to go, let him and have fun.
BTW: my husband's family has ALWAYS been late with planning birthday parties and invites.
We've gotten a few last-minute invitations like that. It seems like it's getting to be a trend - I've gotten invitations several times on Monday for a Saturday party, or worse. One time it was also stuffed in a backpack at school on a Wed for a Fri party, so not only was there short notice, but we didn't see it until after the party happened! I sometimes wonder if the parents do it that way on purpose to cut down the number of kids who show up.
I think considering the kind of odd time of day, they probably did decide to do something at the last minute. Are they inviting the parents too? Maybe they are thinking of hanging out with the neighbors while the kids play, sort of a casual thing?
I wouldn't feel bad about saying no, or saying your son can only go for the first 2 hours, or whatever works for you.
I know today is the day of the party but wanted to throw this out there for you in case you run into a similar situation next time - if you receive an invitation and want and can go, then go. If you can't or don't want to go, then don't.
Really the specifics about why this was planned so late don't matter. Just be happy that your son was included on the invite list. Worrying about the why things were so late will only send him a message that he needs to over analyze things in life.
Try to go with the flow, it really makes life more enjoyable.
Have a great weekend and enjoy the other parties.
Who cares about the details. Yes I think you are over-reacting. I am a little amused that you put this much time and worry into some other 6 year olds birthday party invite. Whatever the reasons for the late invite, does it really matter? You can either go or you can't. You either want to attend or you don't. Choose and move on.
