Ivf - Petaluma,CA

My brother and SIL did three rounds of IVF that failed. It's very expensive and physically and emotionally taxing. There are A LOT of ups and downs. The doctors were honest with them and they went into it knowing that their chances weren't great. However, my SIL knew people who had been successful so she was convinced it would work for them too. The medications she had to take cause weight gain and mood issues. The emotional roller coaster waiting for the results was almost unbearable. They switched doctors for their third and final round. That doctor refused to do any additional rounds unless they used donor eggs, which my SIL didn't want to do. For one of the rounds, I don't remember which, she was "pregnant" (I use that term loosely) for a very short time, but her hormone levels were never near what would be considered a normal, viable pregnancy. So, it didn't work for them and strained some relationships along the way, but they do have friends for whom it worked. If you choose to go that route make sure you research the doctor and the clinic and get a good one that comes with personal recommendations and references. The doctor/clinic should have very high standards and tight rules about their procedures. Ex.--limit the number of fertilized eggs that are implanted, limit the number of rounds they will attempt, etc. Also, do you know the possible reasons for your inability to conceive thus far? That information might be helpful in your decision making process. In my brother and SIL's case it was probably related to the quality of her eggs and her hormone levels, thus affecting their chances. It was a very difficult time in their lives.

Fast forward several years, in October they witnessed the birth of their newborn adopted daughter. She is 8 months old and thriving. My SIL is over the moon happy. However, that wasn't easy either. It also took a few years and at least twice people attempted to scam them. They came very close to giving up. But we have a happy ending and their daughter is perfect for them; almost like the wait was meant to be.

I'm sorry to be so negative, but that is my family's realistic story. Good luck whatever you decide!

I did IVF twice, got pregnant, had an ectopic and surgery (ectopic pregnancies are more common with IVF. The second one got pregnant but miscarried. I spent about 25,000 and came away with nothing. It was grueling...all the drugs, shots etc. I hated dealing with the office staff of the fertility clinic. They were really good at "putting me off" when I was needing information...as a matter of fact, I knew there was something wrong when I had a pregnancy in my tube, but they kept on putting me off and finally, they found it when I had a scheduled ultrasound. I could have died from it.

Anyway....the best part of my story is that even after my ectopic (and losing a tube) I got pregnant on my own at the age of 44. Now I have my daughter.

I know lots of people who ended up getting pregnant on their own either after having a baby through IVF or when they took a break. If your diagnosis is unexplained infertility...please wait and try on your own. Eat fertility promoting foods and make sure you aren't exercising too much.

We dealt with infertility for many years, 7+ years. I went to lots of "specialists" but it was a reproductive endocrinologist that finally figured out what was wrong. (Endometriosis and ovulating way too late.) My first apptmt with him was in February and I was pregnant in August using the IUI procedure once. It is much cheaper and less complicated. I did have to give myself shots which was very hard. I had had the same procedure done before by wonderful specialist #3 but it didn't work because she didn't address the underlying issues first. She just put me on Clomid and tried the IUI 3 or 4 times. So frustrating!!
If you are not seeing an endocrinologist, I would HIGHLY recommend finding one and getting another opinion.

I am sorry you are going through this. I know how emotionally draining it can be. I had pretty much given up and a friend urged me to go to the endocrinologist. I went with very low expectations (he was dr. #4 or 5) and we now have 3 kids, our son and twin girls.

Second try worked for us. I can't stand needles, but it wasn't so difficult, knowing the expected outcome.

Our doctor was great. His staff was great. I am hoping that we can do it again in the next year.

I am so sorry you are facing this. I have had a number of friends go through this with complete mixed results. Some it worked the first time and everything is great. Others are still struggling. The one thing that I see as a constant is the strain it puts on their marriages. Infertility is such a stressful issue between a couple. None of them ever divorced over it, but it definitely put them through the ringer. Be prepared for that and make sure that your relationship with your husband is strong. You guys will need each other. Best of luck to you, whatever you decide!

IVF was wonderful for us - we got pregnant with our son first try!

After having 2 ectopic pregnancies (and having both tubes removed) by the age of 27, IVF was our next option. Got pregnant on our first try with fresh eggs and froze the remaining ones. Three years later took 2 tries to get pregnant again using the frozen eggs. Had a beautiful baby girl in 2007 and then a gorgeous son in 2011. Taking all the drugs was hard - I was very emotional, very hormonal. Having to go to the dr every other day for blood tests, ultrasounds, etc. was very time consuming and stressful. Not to mention the cost is very expensive. Looking back now I have no regrets. I see it as being a small sacrifice for the life I am able to have with my kids now. Best of luck to you.

I have a friend who did IVF (successfully) and adopted after that. Her take on it all: having a baby physically come out of your body is not what makes you a mom.

Don't get me wrong - she's not sorry she did the IVF. She simply came to realize that it's what you do every day after you have your child in your arms that counts. And so when they were ready to have a second child, they went with adoption instead of IVF again.

I don't know of anyone who has gone that route, but there are some facts to keep in mind, and some things to think about:

-The success rate is around 25%, depending on your age. Success is defined as a live birth.
-Embryos are created first and stored. What will happen to the unused embryos?
-What will happen if you have multiples?
-Look up IVF and birth defects. There's a significantly increased risk of birth defects with IVF.

There are a lot of ethical implications with this procedure. Many people view it in a negative light, because it treats children as commodities.

I just read this article this morning, and I thought you were going to ask about this. Maybe it would help you to read it? I don't know... You could show the article to your doctor and see what she says...

http://www.whattoexpect.com/wom/baby/0618/first-baby-born...