Is It Rude to Ask People to Take Their Shoes off Before Entering Your House?

Updated on May 07, 2013
M.H. asks from Pompano Beach, FL
45 answers

Hi Moms! I'm curious to hear how you handle asking people to take their shoes off before entering your homes. We never wear our shoes in our house because of our 18 month old. He's always on the floor playing so we leave our shoes at the front door. When people come to my house (repair men, friends, etc.) I ask them to also remove their shoes, but I'm always uncomfortable asking them to do it. How do you all handle this situation? Am I being overly paranoid or am I justified in asking? We had some people come over today to fix our sliding doors and the guy refused to take his shoes off. I asked very nicely and even joked that my husband has to take his shoes off too, but the guy acted offended. I'd love to hear what you all think and if any of you do the same thing. Thanks!

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So What Happened?

Thanks to everyone for their responses. Many of you stated that workers need their shoes on to do the jobs in the house. The worker who sounded offended had actually been doing work outside and was coming in to wash his hands and take care of the bill. I understand that certain jobs require the workers to keep their shoes on and I didn't ask this of people who were doing some remodeling in the bathroom, only those who were coming into the house after working on things outside. I work in a hospital, so I know the kinds of bad things shoes can pick up and track in - that's why I'm a little paranoid. I appreciate everyone taking the time to respond!

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S.M.

answers from Miami on

I am a stay at home mom with a 3 year old boy and a 16 month old girl and they are always on the floor. I personally think making people take there shoes off is a little too much. I clean my floors everyday with mr clean anti bacterial and theyve never gotten sick because of that. I would think only a child that had a poor immune system would get sick. My mother in law used to be like that with my husband and his head started growing bigger than his body. When she took him to the doctor he told her to let me roll around in dirt. Kids need that to build anti bodies. Now the floor cant be disgustingly dirty but if you maintain in clean there shouldnt be a problem. I also spray lysol on the floor. Hope this helps!

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C.M.

answers from Miami on

We have a no shoes rule also, but I have to say that I think that asking a worker to remove his boots is a little too much. They are not coming in to do a specific task and it is not time efficient or professional for them to walk around without shoes. Insisting that they remove their shoes, in my humble opinion, might be construed as rude. PLus they might have grimey feet!! :) Walking without shoes in someone else's home is something I would only consider for those we are familiar with. You know?

Good luck!!

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M.S.

answers from Fort Walton Beach on

My rule of thumb would be "do you have a relationship w/ that person"? If yes, then it's "my house ,my rules" but if not, I wouldn't push the subject but would just clean up after they left...

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N.G.

answers from Miami on

Sorry to say but yes I think you are being OVERLY PARANOID. Germs are everywhere and they are a good thing. Germs help to build a child's immune system. I am a clean freak myself. I vacuum and mop at least 3 times a week but I encourage my boys to get dirty and then they get a bath. You don't want to raise your child in a bubble, relax and get a little dirty yourself.

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J.R.

answers from Boca Raton on

I would not ask a repair man or any professional coming to do any sort of work at the house to remove their shoes. I can think of two good reasons: 1) They may need their shoes on for safety reasons depending on the work done 2) The condition/cleanliness of their feet may not be desirable especially if they have been working all day. The second reason could apply to anyone visiting your home.

As far as guests I would suggest having a basket of clean socks of various sizes placed beside a small shoe rack inside by the front door. You could then ask your guests to remove their shoes and let them know that you have socks available if they would like. That way if someone is uncomfortable for any reason - in need of a pedicure, a hole in their sock, sweaty socks, etc. they have an option to make them feel more comfortable.

Personally, I would choose to avoid possibly making my guests uncomfortable and would instead choose to clean the floors after they leave. A clean environment for your child is important, but I also feel that making guests as comfortable as possible in my home is important too.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

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J.H.

answers from Pensacola on

M.,

(Just offering a different view.)

It is easy to understand your rule of no shoes, however, If you explain the reason for your request to those entering they would probably understand and comply. Especially friends and family.

About repairmen, I think you are taking on liability to ask them to remove their shoes. In many cases their occupations demand that they wear shoes and even certain types of shoes for safety. If you don't mind and can well afford the bill or suit you may get, by all means ask them. Your house, your rules.

I think they should not be made to feel uncomfortable when coming in to render a service. Many wear uniforms. Taking off of shoes for workers, and they are strangers in some cases, is a kind of share their private things with you matter and could cause them to become shy, uncomfortable and that could make for a bad job being done(smile)

Feet are private things in many cultures and some beliefs. If this is a guy with fungus, you may be getting more than you paid for that service to be rendered. You would definitely not want to expose your baby to this health hazard and with some smelly fungus feet, it would be best for them to leave on their shoes.

Just sweep, swiffer or vacuum very well when they leave and place the baby in the play pen until they have done the job, left and you have cleaned the area behind them. The guy could have felt like he had been asked to get naked. Some men are still modest. (LOL) Make an exception for workers on that rule. You may get the freak of the week guy who does not hear the part about you do this for the baby and think that shoes off means everything off. Prayerfully not. You be safe and keep them safe on your property.

Best of luck to ya!

J.

P.S.
In suit happy America, you must protect yourself and family from frivolous suits and causes for liability.

J.

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A.C.

answers from Boca Raton on

Hi M.! We also have a no shoe rule..but I only use that for friends and family. I don't ask work people to remove their shoes. I think, for a lot of jobs, they might need the traction. They also might have holes in their socks, or bad feet..who knows. I just observe where they walk, and if need be, clean up after. There really is not a ton of dirt, here in south florida. If you have a dirt driveway, and it is a rainy day, then I might consider asking, but for me I don't feel the need to ask work people. Friends and family, on the other hand, must take off their shoes. I like the other moms suggestion to have those booties to put over the boots. That seems like a good compromise.
A. :)

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T.F.

answers from Orlando on

Friends and family-- no problem... But if you think about it, work people's sweaty socks (or bare feet if they don't wear socks or take them off along with their shoes) are full o germs, too. I would clean up after them but not ask them to remove their shoes. I don't believe the "your house/your rules" because YOU hired THEM to come to your home-- they may have an "I don't work in my socks" rule! Work boots protect their feet if something drops on them, so yea- I can see him being offended or thinking it was a strange request.

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D.G.

answers from Boca Raton on

I dont know that I'd call it paranoid, although children have been crawling on floors where people walk as long as there have been children, so I didnt stress over it. I think you have to bear in mind the reasons some people, especially strangers, might not be happy about it. Perhaps the man has a bad foot odor problem, or perhaps he is not well off and his socks had holes in them and he was embarrassed. Ask people to remove their shoes, but if they insist not, let it go and give the floors a quick spray down with lysol when they leave. Being flexible will teach your baby, even at this age, that everything wont always go their way and that's OK. Flexibility is a trait that is VERY valuable as an adult and can get people through the toughest times.

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C.K.

answers from Jacksonville on

I don't think so. We do the same thing. It is surprising some of the things tracked inside houses by wearing your shoes-dirt, pesticides, feces, etc.
Our house stays so much cleaner by not wearing them in the house. I just politely ask people to take their shoes off at the door-it's your house, people should comply with this simple request. I've had a few people look at me strange but I just let it roll off my back. My kids are on the floor alot too and they are the #1 priority (ages 3, 11 months and one on the way)
Good luck and hang in there!
C.

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H.S.

answers from Orlando on

I used to have a cleaning business and we would have clients like yourself. They would buy the shoe covers that you can get and have them by the front door for us.

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S.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

No it is not rude. Its your house and people need to follow YOUR rules. We always have shoes @ our door entrance and most people offer to take them off. You should absolutly stand your ground! I used to feel bad but now I've taken a very assertive attitude and nobody gives me problems anymore! Good Luck

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W.T.

answers from Jacksonville on

Glad to hear I'm not the only one who feels this way. I've been living in Asia for a number of years now where it is common practice for EVERYONE entering the house to take off shoes and I have to say that I love it! I am looking at coming back to the US this summer and have the same concerns as you. Family and friends should understand but most people just don't like to take off their shoes. Smelly feet, torn socks or having to sit and get them back on are a few reasons, I suppose.

I guess all you can do with maintenance people is make the request in a nice way and if they are uncomfortable let it go. I suppose that's what I'll do. Hopefully they will be in an area that the children don't frequent.

Good luck and I look forward to reading your other responses.

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D.C.

answers from Orlando on

M.,

I too have that same rule in my house. I also have this sign that we got in Hawaii that says nicely, to remove your shoes. It hangs at the front door and when people see it, they take off their shoes. I've never asked a repair man to remove their shoes but if they are done and come back in to use the restroom, they have removed their shoes or some have even put on the footies. When my childrens friends come over they all take off their shoes and leave them at the door.

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M.G.

answers from Miami on

Try as I do to keep the floors clean as long as possible (telling husband and child to remove their shoes at the door), they eventually need cleaning again. If it were me and I asked the service guy to take off his shoes and he was uncomfortable with it, (maybe he has smelly feet or dirty socks) I would have just let it go and not make a big deal about it. So after the workers leave, you could just run a mop over your floors!

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A.B.

answers from Orlando on

I do the same thing. I don't want people to track in the house. I ask that they take off their shoes. My house my rules. Your doing the right thing.

Shoes at the door already when they arrive gives most people a clue...they ask me most of the time!

A.

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B.P.

answers from Jacksonville on

After many moppings and 3 kids and husband walking in the house by the end of the day it would look like I did nothing I was practicaly mopping everyday. My baby crawls all over the floor. The last straw was when poop got tracked in. My sighn at the front door says "If you are younger than 40 please remove shoes before entering the house. Thank you, Managment".

That got the point across.

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T.C.

answers from Boca Raton on

Make a cute sign or something that can be displayed just outside the door so they have a chance to take them off without having to be asked. Also maybe create a little shoe rack for them just in front of the door either outsie or in so that they see you mean it. Its your house so whatever makes you comfy. Good luck!

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E.P.

answers from Boca Raton on

i actually put up a sign at my door. i hand painted a pc of drift wood (my home theme is beach like) and it says, "leave your shoes and your worries at the door!". and then i just remind people to please read the sign. :)

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R.S.

answers from Miami on

I felt the same way when my son was a baby. I don't have people do it all the time now since he doesn't eat off the floor; "well, not always".

As far as the workmen are concerned, it could be a liability for them. Unfortunately, I let them keep their shoes on as a lot of times they have to go inside and outside a lot. They would have to keep taking their shoes off and putting them on constantly.

Do not feel bad as it does feel uncomfortable at times but it's your child and you are only trying to keep them safe.

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M.P.

answers from New York on

Hi, I think its not bad at all to ask as long as you ask politely. I too have a no shoe policy in my house, but due to religious reason. So I have got a solution and bought something called shoe cover. I got it from home depot. They are bags like the one we get from grocery store but in a shoe design, which the worker can just tag in on the top of their shoe and walk around freely. This way they don't need to remove shoe and not expose their shocks if it has hole :)

But still with that many workers feel offend to wear that, but I think they should understand that if you have a no shoe policy in your home and in your house you don't wear it, then taking off the shoe or wearing the shoe cover is never an insult.

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V.M.

answers from Miami on

I dont think it is rude. First of all it is your house and you are protecting your child. (great job), Second these people are visiting you so if a repair man can not justify your request then ask him to leave and get another repair man. There are alot of people out there looking for work. And your friends and relatives should definately understand. Especially since you have a small child. By the way my daughter and son in law do the same thing. They have a small shoe rack right at the front door. When you walk in you take your shoes off and put them on the rack. They have a 2 year old. Your doing a great job girl.... keep it up.

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D.J.

answers from Dallas on

No you are not paranoid. You have a right to a clean environment. Your home ,your policy and a common sense one at that. Disregard the ignorant comments about being paranoid and germs are everywhere. There are good germs and there are bad germs. True our homes will have germs no matter how clean we are, however, the 'No Shoe Policy' is very reasonable even for workers that must come into our home and I have no children in my home now. ( They are adults with children practicing the same policy now) What I have done is purchased some shoe covers for the workers. I got a 100 pack for $18.09 through Amazon. If the workers respect the householder they will put them on. I do this with no quilt or shame. The bottom of shoes carry all kinds of filthy germs you don't want to take a chance with especially if you have allergies. Look up www.ehow.com/video_###-###-####_reducing_allergies-remove.... I hope this answer will be of help and comfort. D. Jenkins

V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

Hi M., I know I am late responding, but I read through most of the other responses (not EVERY one, there were a LOT! LOL). And the one thing I didn't see mentioned was having a place to sit while removing or putting back on the shoes. A mat, shelf or basket is great for a place for the shoes while they are not being worn, but having a place to sit is probably more of an issue.

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A.H.

answers from Pensacola on

I do not think it is rude at all!! - And, anyone who is friends with you probably already knows your request! - If you invite other people over - let them know ahead of time - or put a little sign up before they come over :) - I know that I have been asked this several times and never thought anything about it.

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S.W.

answers from Miami on

Not rude. If it is your wish, then have people take their nasty grass-laden, toxic-waste filled shoes off before entering your home. You offer a clean floor for them to walk on. You may extend your hospitality by offering a special matt to wipe the feet once the shoes are off, a "mud room" is just that, the place to take off your shoes and leave outside of the house, offer inexpensive socks to wear so the feet are not cold, anything creative to make it a fun and welcoming experience. And you vacuum less...
Blessings

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A.M.

answers from Jacksonville on

I have the same rule in my house. With a basket at the front door with those blue surgical bootie covers for those who are not willing to take them off. Your house, your rules. Silly or not. You are just following the rule of "when you know better, you do better." You know what harmful stuff can be tracked in but others do not (or just don't care). Work men can wash their hands at the hose and take care of the bill at the front entry way if they refuse. Now once your kiddo is a little bigger, you may consider laxing the rules for those you don't know very well as you will have to allow a small amount of dirt to come in once your son is not always playing on the floor.

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B.K.

answers from Tallahassee on

a lot of people don't wear shoes in the house. just ask them. Have a shoe shelf or basket by the door for shoes. You could even have a cute little sign.

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L.B.

answers from Jacksonville on

I would recommend that you also briefly tell the person why you're asking them to take off their shoes. Sometimes people are clueless and may just think that you're being a germaphob (which shouldn't matter because it's YOUR house and you can run it the way you choose) but it you let them know that it's because your toddler spends the majority of his play time on the floor, then you probably won't feel as guilty and they will probably be more than happy to honor your request. Maybe just say "could you take off your shoes so Connor won't eat/get a hold of/play with anything tracked in from the ground/outdoors. Babies tend to find the smallest bits of particles interesting and easy to put in their mouths but they are unnoticeable to us."

M.F.

answers from Tallahassee on

M. - Your house your rules period. For the ones that refuse - give them shoe covers! It is not rude or crazy, growing up my best friends mom never let us wear shoes in her house. Get a cute sign and hang it next to the main door that you use. That way they cannot say they didn't expect it. You really don't have to justify your reasons to ANYBODY honestly.

Stick to your guns Mom.

M. F

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D.M.

answers from Daytona Beach on

If they don't want to. Maybe provide them with those things that go over there shoes. If they still refuse call the company.

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M.P.

answers from Orlando on

it's not rude at all; we do the same thing for the same reason. However we have a basket of socks available for people to use and put on when they come over and you can get the shoe covers for the workers that come... Many of them already have them so just ask. It's your home and they need to respect your wishes, so don't feel bad about it at all. If your friends don't like the idea of it then you might want to consider how true of a friend they are; we've never had anybody be offended when we ask and now they are so used to it that they just automatically just take their shoes off when they come and bring their own socks.

good luck!

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J.B.

answers from Abilene on

I know I'm answering a little late, but I don't think you're wrong in wanting people to take their shoes off at the door! It's your home! Many other cultures do this with no problem, and I dare say that no one would be so offended if walking into the home of a kind Asian family who requests this!

Here's a solution I've been considering for people who feel uncomfortable with taking off their shoes: Purchase shoe cover-booties like you would wear when a new carpet has just been installed. They are disposable and would even allow your workers to do jobs inside (even though I know you pointed out that he was working outside) without getting mud or dirt from outside in your house.

Whether or not it really poses a problem to the health of your family, it certainly makes it harder to keep floors clean when shoes are worn from outside to inside. You're not asking too much. When I enter the home of someone else, I prefer to adapt to THEIR customs, rather than making them adapt to mine. Guests should be more considerate.

I also leave a few pairs of shoes close to the door to help guests visually take note of this no-shoe rule, especially if I happen to be wearing "indoor-only" shoes. That way I can make the distinction and let them know without it seeming like I just don't like THEIR shoes.

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S.L.

answers from Boca Raton on

Close friends and family you can ask to take off shoes, people you first meet and invite over no, We don't wear shoes in our house but i don't ask friends to take their shoes off, if you feel you have to do this, and like that worker refused buy shoe footies to put over their shoes like they do in hospitals. I have 5 children and 3 dogs, one of my children is a heart patient, i sweep and vaccum and mop 2 times a day but, i am really not worried, I do that because i have all tile floors and 3 dogs and 2 smaller boys I think your 18 month old would be fine if someone wore shoes in the house, germs are still on your feet and socks from your shoes. Just buy the footies for people who don't want to remove their shoes. Good Luck
S. mom to 5 amazing children 17yrs,9yrs,7yrs,3yrs,and 19 months check out my sons journey at www.liamlockhart.com

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R.C.

answers from Orlando on

its your home, you can ask anything you want. maybe have disposable booties to put over their shoes if they refuse..or ask him to come around the back to the door. i mean if he has been working allday he might have gross feet and be embarrassed...

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S.S.

answers from Daytona Beach on

put up a sign on your front door and cover it in a plastic cover. that way you shouldn't even have to ask them to do so. i think that now you can even buy them at some stores

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L.L.

answers from Melbourne on

How about having a big sign that says "Socks Only Inside!", and point to it as people enter? I have a friend that has a basket of new socks in assorted sizes at her front door in case people need them. Your house, your rules!

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P.O.

answers from Jacksonville on

That's a tricky situation but I don't think you are paranoid. The question is, do you and your household take off their shoes? If you do, then I think it is rude on the visitors part to not take a clue and follow suit. You shouldn't have to ASK them to do so and be put in such awkward position. If I go somewhere and see shoes at the front door and the host have their shoes off, out of common courtesy I take off mine too. Now as for the service men, asking them (since they are on the job) might be a different story and as much as you would like them to do so, I don't think you should ask them to. Other guests however, should take off their shoes. Maybe how you say it matters. Instead of telling them to take off their shoes, you might reflect on your needs and tell them, "My son crawls alot on the carpet and with him being so young, I do't want him to get sick, so we take off our shoes", then they might see more reason to do so.

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M.H.

answers from Gainesville on

We also have a "no shoes in the house" rule, but I would never ask a repair professional, a complete stranger, (whether doing work inside or out) to remove their shoes. I think that is taking it a bit to far. I just expect that it is par for the course when they are coming over, and I make sure to clean up after them.

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M.E.

answers from Orlando on

Hi M.,

Personally, it wouldn't bother me to take my shoes off. That being said, I know some people who would not do it. My mother, for one, she has problems with her feet and doesn't walk aroud without shoes. Also, it could be an embrassement issue with some people. They may be worried about foot odor or something. If it really bothers you, I would suggest you get some of those little paper booties that doctor's put on over their shoes for people that don't want to remove their shoes.

M. E

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T.M.

answers from Orlando on

A good friend of mine is of Japanese heritage. It is part of the culture to take shoes off at the door, germs or no germs. It is simply rude to wear shoes in her home. It would never occur to me to question someone who didn't want shoes in their home.

And I have worked in a hospital also and have seen the problems that can occur by coming inside with dirty shoes. A co-worker had a husband who was a paraplegic. My co-worker ended up bringing CDT home on her shoes and it infected her husband who ended up barely surviving the illness. Young, older and disabled people can have weakened immune systems that are severely impacted from things that might not effect the average, healthy adult.

It's your house...your child...and YOU who has to clean up. If you don't want shoes in your home, then no one else should question that or belittle you. Next time let the repair guy wash his hands from the hose and write the bill up in his car. You can pay him from the door.

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T.B.

answers from Miami on

M.,
We never ever wear shoes in our our home either. I, too, at times had felt uncomfortable asking people to remove their shoes. But you know what? I don't anymore and why? Because it's MY house and they are my rules. You simply say, "We don't wear shoes in our home and I need you to remove your shoes before entering." I had a guest actually ask if this was some sort of religious act we were following. To which I replied, "No, I simply do not like walking around on a dirty floor." To simplify things, I went to my local craft store and bought a small wooden plaque which I painted/decorated myself and it says, "Welcome to our home...Please remove your shoes before entering." I have it nailed right outside of our door so anyone who knocks, will see it and if they "forget" I never fail to remind them. I don't care if people are offended by my request. IF they cannot respect or refuse to respect my rules/wishes, then they are not worth my friendship. My sister works at a hospital and got me a few pairs of those disposable shoe covers that people wear in the operating room. I'm not sure where you can buy them, but in cases where I need a stranger to come into my house, I will offer those shoe covers to them for them to use. Don't allow people to make you feel bad. Shame on them for not respecting you and your home.

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T.T.

answers from Pensacola on

No, it is not rude at all. I ask people to remove their shoes because I have two children with allergies and one of the two has allergy induced asthma. So I ask people to take their shoes off because I don't want them to track any allergens in from outside on their shoes.

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M.B.

answers from Melbourne on

M.,

Absolutely not! It is your home and your child. People don't realize all the germs that are carried on the bottoms of our shoes. We have to same rule in our household. If a visitor feels uncomfortable I offer them socks or surgical booties.

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H.P.

answers from Orlando on

M.,
What we do is when we are having people over, we put several pair of shoes by the front door. Most of the time it works.
We have an 18 month old as well & feel the exact same way.
I cannot imagine somebody getting offended by you asking them that. That is ridiculous!
H.

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