The other day we recieved our insurance premium bill. It went from $600. to $1245. My other half decides to start calling around to try and find another insurance company. I suggested to him that he contact the home office of our company to see why after five years it doubled all of the sudden since nothing had changed other than we installed an alarm system. He had spoken with our local agent who all she could say was that insurance has gone up this year. When I asked him later on if he had called our current insurance company he stated no. He informed me that he had been on the telephone with other insurance companies getting quotes. When I asked him why he had not called our company he said, "I will take care of my business!" This really hurt me. I did not expect him to say this to me. I thought I was trying to help. Am I wrong in making suggestions? Am I wrong in trying to help?
Should I just keep my mouth shut?
Well, some of you are wondering why I didn't pick up the phone and call myself. Had I done that, then he really would have gotten mad. Unlike my ex-husband who I had to do everything for him. I did not sleep a wink last night. I am just so hurt by his reply to me. I just thought we were a team and helped each other out.
He is feeling the stress of added bills & ?may? feel like you're hounding him. & I have to admit: by doing his homework & researching what other companies are charging.....he is "armed" with the data he needs to renegotiate with your current company! His process makes sense!
Back off!
I'm appalled by the fact that so many women seem to think that you are demasculating your man by asking a simple question, thereby insinuating you should keep your mouth shut!!
What I see here is that you offered a suggestion, followed up ONCE with a 'did you do it?' and then asked why not when he said no. Where's the badgering and nagging in that?
On a side note, maybe a less aggressive 'how come' instead of 'why not' (and tone of voice means everything in these situations) may have yeilded a different reaction.
You have every right to know why your premiums doubled and he (or you, in my house I would be doing the investigating) should find out, whether you stay with that company or not. What is he hiding by NOT asking? If it is a simple as nothing happened and it's a general increase in rates then by all means let him shop around.
Do NOT let him treat you that way over something so silly as asking him ONE TIME if he took your suggestion!!
I'm so sick of rude posters on this site! I forgot there are so many perfect wives on here!
I don't think you should stop trying to help out. Maybe next time offer to call the current company while he calls around for quotes. I'm guessing he just snapped at you from frustration from being on the phone w/ so many different companies. Not excusing him but I know I have taken my frustration out on my husband before (GASP! Yes, ladies, I'm not on one you perfect wives!).
You do not state what kind of insurance ... Home is what I am assuming by "installed and alarm system" and if that is the case, I do not own so I am not 100% on this, but my car insurance comes with a breakdown every 6 months to explain any reasons in price diff. Husbands do not like to be questioned on a regular basis about something... when I need my man to take care of something I tell him once and make sure he has the number(s) and other information needed to take care of it, allow 3 days to go by and say, "hey you never told me what the _____ company said about ______". He will respond by saying, 'Oh they said _________ 'or he will say 'I'll tell you later when the house is not so crazy." If I get the second that means he did not do it I give it 2 days and if it is not taken care of by then I do it myself. No nagging, the way I approach it makes him feel like I trust him as a man to do things for our home and I do not assume he can not take care of it himself. It is all about ensuring he still feels masculine, like the provider, and YOUR MAN. Do you have any idea how de masculating your conversation with him was? I am not at all shocked he snapped. There are a few "old" rules on dealing with men that I still try to follow... 1 make sure he thinks it was his idea, 2 smart women quietly run the home and thier man in the background. They have worked well for me thus far.
He shouldn't have snapped at you like that. That was rude. You were only showing concern (like--maybe it was a mistake on the bill? etc.)
BUT when we got sick of our insurance rate, my hubby got quotes from a few companies then said "should we call 'joe' to see if he can match this lowest price" and I was like 'No way! He was happy to take our money for over 10 years and never tried to offer us any better rates, so screw him!' (I know, not nice, but I really hate that!)
So maybe your husband was so angry at the rate hike that he wanted nothing to do with them anymore--even to question the increase? That still doesn't make him snapping at you acceptable though. You were just asking a reasonable question!
Oh....yeah....this has Obamacare written all over it.....PLEASE!
How on earth were you trying to help? By asking him repeated questions? That doesn't sound very helpful.
Why wouldn't you help him by picking up the phone and calling other companies AND your insurance company? Really, the best way to do it WOULD be to call other companies to get their quotes, and THEN call your company.
Why didn't you pick up the phone yourself?
If he is getting other quotes probably what he'll do is then call the current company and say these companies have better prices, what can you do for me?
Why are you emasculating your man by being so grumpy about it? Do you complain about the way he does housework too?
Our premium did the same...In addition to many economic factors etc...let's all not forget because of Obamacare premiums are going up so Ins companies can insure everyone which means we who are already paying have to pay for those who both deserve and don't deserve the help.
Hey Marcela,
It does sound like he might be freaked about the extra $ going to the bill. However - you states "my other half" - are you married or just living together. If you are married it's your money too that has to pay this bill. I got a vibe from your request: Could he be hiding a claim from you that would have doubled your payment? This would cause him refrain calling your current company since he already knows the new price. Instead of asking about the insurance again - just let him make his calls and see what the outcome is. You have already made your request that he call - just wait and see if he follows thru.
I think calling your insurance company seems logical. Is there some reason why you, yourself, can't call them? Maybe your husband is miffed that your premium doubled and doesn't really care to know the reason he just wants to go with another company. A 'fine, they won't get my money' type of thing. Does your husband usually snap at you when he is stressed (I am assuming this incident has him stressed...money issues usually do bring stress)? Did you suggest he call your insurance company multiple times? I tend to get a little annoyed and waspish if someone continually suggests something and I just haven't gotten a chance to do it yet.
By asking him to do something and repeatedly asking if he did it, that is not helping. That is nagging. Sorry, but it's true. We all do it sometimes. Helping would be to say "How can I help? Why don't I call our insurance compnay while you get quotes."
But the fact of the matter on insurance - it really has gone way way up. When the price of oil went up, they started trying to squeeze more usable gasoline out of the sludge. Well, sludge is what roofing shingles are made of. So a roof that used to cost 4,000 to replace now costs 7,000. Add the billions paid out in hurricane claims, and insurance is just going up. Car insurance too. The number of uninsured driver claims have driven that cost up. As your getting quotes, scratch Farmers and Allstate off your list. They have just filed for big increases. So, even if you get in on one price, your 1st renewal 6 months later will go way up. Some of the more reasonable companies are Travellers, the Hartford, and USAA.
Call yourself. Sounds like someone needs to get down the bottom of it.
Make sure you do not just look at what the cost is, but this website explains how to find a company that actually services you quickly and pays you when you make a claim.
http://www.edmunds.com/auto-insurance/how-to-choose-the-r...;
Check your own state's Division Of Insurance Consumer Affairs website where there will be data on the companies in your state and their complaints ratio per claims. You want one with the least complaints.
There is a house near my inlaws that burned and for 6 months they had a huge sign out front that they were "not in good hands" since their insurance company slogan was a joke and they had to argue for months to get them to pay even a partial payment. So make sure it is not just the premiums but that you get a company that pays claims.
Well, if it were auto insurance, and the premium went up that much, your husbands reaction might have me thinking he was hiding an accident from you. Did he have a passenger in the car with him at the time? You can call them yourself and find out what is going on. If there's been any kind of claim, your rates are going to be high no matter what company you go with.
It's possible the rates have just gone up all over. There's no harm in shopping around for the best deal you can get.
