I Need Help Potty Training

I really liked many of the suggestions, especially what Betty O. had to say. For youngsters, toilet learning can come in fits and starts. When we honor them by helping them with this process as *they* (not we) are interested, the effects are far more lasting.

A child will certainly use the toilet for a reward (stickers/candy) for a while, but my experience has shown me that the children who responded best to this method were already on their way (and interested) in using the toilet to begin with. Uninterested chidren usually stopped responding to the reward or upped the ante, asking for more. Or, wanting the reward without having "produced" anything in the toilet, which can lead to a whole other wrinkle of conflict. I have seen rewards become a real pain in the neck, and don't use them myself. I also do tend to discourage families I work with from using them, for the above reasons.

If you are curious about "toilet learning", (not potty training, which is typically adult-led) look online. There are many terrific articles that focus on the child's signs of readiness and help parents assess whether or not their child is developmentally ready to start this process. Some children initiate the process on their own because they are curious, some because they really prefer not to be in wet diapers and are ready to use the toilet. It's hard to know if our child's interest in the toilet is a passing fancy or a serious intent to master this skill.

When we give our chidren space and time to go at their own pace, when we honor their process and let them feel really proud when they find moments of success (and reassure them when they don't!), we give them the wonderful experience of having accomplished a goal they have set for themselves, with the addition of knowing their parents support them unconditionally, through their mistakes and triumphs!

2 moms found this helpful

It sounds about right:) Toddlers move in out of using the potty because they are physically growing into controlling/holding their bodily functions, and they are learning about self-ownership of their bodily functions.(i.e. I own my poop and will poop where I want to)
Don't worry, the road to potty training is stop and go sometimes, not every child is the same.
I personally am not a fan of the praise/reward method, as alot of children need bigger rewards past stickers and more elaborate praise to keep doing the same task. But I have also seen kids do well with the sticker method.
What I do for my own child is let her acknowledge her own accomplishment at potty time, then I re-enforce her self-praise. Sometimes she goes for weeks in the potty,and sometimes she tells me she wants to go in her pull-up. I respect her wishes either way. She still wears a pull-up, because she is still growing and developing, and when she has growth spurts, her bladder has growth spurts too:)
Every child is different, and only you know what is going to work best for your relationship. Good luck!

2 moms found this helpful

My daughter started to show interest at about 20 months. I bought all the stuff and got so excited and figured we were on the way. But it was all fun and games for her. So, I just went along with what she wanted. I decided that I cannot make her do anything she doesn't want to do. So, I decided every day to ask her if today was the day she wanted to wear panties. I got the no answer until about 3 weeks ago. She is about 2 years and 3months. And then she said yes to panties and we are now well on our way to being potty trained. She is doing so well. Poop and pee.
I did not use pullups unless we are going out somewhere. They are too much like diapers for her. I also reward her for each potty attempt with one M&M. She loves chocolate and that treat worked for us. Now the treat isn't needed although she asks on occassion for it. Some don't believe in rewards, but I think you do what you need to do, or what works for you. Stickers or a future gift didn't work for us. I knew chocolate would do it for us.
My suggestion is to let your son take the lead otherwise it will lead to your frustration. He may be interested, but really not ready. Ask everyday if he wants to wear big boy pants and ask if he wants to try the potty. If he says no, then take that answer and go on. When he is ready, it will happen.
Good luck to you.

1 mom found this helpful

I too used the run around naked method with both of my kids and it worked wonderfully. We kept the potty in the bathroom and whenever they would feel (or see) themselves start to pee we would say "hurry hurry" really excitedly and start to run for the potty. It took a very short time and they both basically potty trained themselves. My son did regress a little when he was playing outside because he would get too busy and not want to come back in, but when we told him it was OK to potty outside that seemed to fix that. My daughter, who is now 3, liked peeing outside as well and it cracks us up to catch her at it all by herself lol.

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I really wouldn't force this issue, it will just frustrate you both. My son started using the potty just after 2, but he wasn't fully trained until 3.5. I spent over a year trying everything. Rewards like stickers and candy didn't work for either child that I potty trained (they would like it for a day or two and then get bored). The onlyworked was TIME and thing that the child doing it on their own without bribing, rewarding or constant reminding. I even put my son in underwear full time at 2.5 because I thought that if he had to wet himself over and over that he'd use the potty. This didn't work either, he would use the potty most of the time, but if he was distracted he would hold it until the last moment and wet himself (2-3 accidents a day). One day it just clicked on and stopped having accidents. I didn't have to push, force or bribe.

I think you should leave the potty there and give him a little praise if he uses it. If you start to force this issue now it's likely that you'll just end up frustrated. I'm pregnant again and I'm not going to spend anytime pushing something that my child isn't ready for. Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

This worked for me, but some people may have an issue with it. I closed the curtains and doors and let my daughter go bare but around the house in one room with a potty, and when she had to go, I rushed and set her on the potty and had her trained in 2 days. I had to have her fully potty trained to send her to the college I was going to go to and it worked, just in time.

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Not yet two is pretty young to start potty training, despite this new trend by so many who think start earlier and younger is better. It is wonderful that he was showing signs of wanting to use to the toilet and was going once a day. However, potty training, at any age, is a two steps forward one step back process. And if your son isn't even two yet, it's more like one step forward one step back. Go back to diapers for awhile. Don't push him to use the potty. He will start showing interest again when he's ready. I truly believe it is best to go through this process on their schedule and not on yours. You will see better, faster results than if try to push them into it too soon. Know that every child has their own schedule. Some take to it early and quickly others are a little slower.
Good Luck!!

Firecracker cutie G
Let him know that the pull ups are his Big Boys underware just like Daddys this may or may not help but its worth a try good luck J. a Mom & Granma.

First thing you need to do is switch to cloth training pants or regular cotton underwear. If he is early in potty training and you want to be consistent, then cloth training pants are a lifesaver! He will feel like he is wearing underwear, but your car and his clothes will be protected from accidents when he has to pee at the far end of the store or when you are driving around and he falls asleep in his carseat, etc. The problem with Pull Up is they are glorified diapers. They still won't train a child.

Around 2 years old (give or take a few months) children start making the mind/body connection. If they are in disposable diapers, they do not feel wet and cannot connect their bodily functions with a discomfort they should feel when relieving themselves.

If he has a favorite stuffed animal or doll, have him show it how to use the potty. Children learn best by teaching.

We also used big praise and encouragement, plus we try to get children to take pride and self-praise themselves when they go in the potty. This helps them want to continue. Some children respond to rewards of other forms. like charts and stickers, presents, food, etc.

These are great for starting out. When you and your son are ready for the big day, then there are a number of methods that train them quickly. One is having them run around naked or with just underwear and have him go on the potty every 10 minutes or so to reinforce that's where he goes. If he has an accident especially if he decides something else he is doing is more fun than going potty and decides to go in his pants, then the most effective mtehod is to do a repetition reinforcement. As soon as an accident occurs, take him to the potty have him sit on it and tell him this is where he goes potty. Have him stand up and pull up his pants (good opportunity to put dry ones on him), go back to where he was playing and then tell him we don't go potty here and then have him walk back to the potty and repeat this 10 times (far more tedious for the parent than the child, but it really works in training a child fast). Your son will quickly realize it is better to stop what he is doing and go to the potty and then go back to playing rather than having an accident and having to repeat the exercise over and over.

Sincerely,
A.
www.punkinbutt.com
Ph: ###-###-####

2 is pretty young to potty train. he has shown some good signs, but I would probably let it go for now. don't make an issue of it. He will do it when he is ready. Boys seem to be harder to train than girls. They just dont seem to mind being poopy or wet for long periods of time.

My daughter was using the potty chair almost daily at 20 months and then lost interest. Very frustrating! My friend (a pediatric nurse) said she'll do when she's ready, it's like a switch in the brain. And it happened that way. BTW, another friend said that pull-up just end up being confusing (we just used them at night). Good luck!

First of all remember that he is not even two years old. My son started using the potty at 17 months old and didn't really potty train until he was 3 1/2 years old. Boys take longer. The best strategy is to not force it or he will fight you and then you will get nowhere with it. Keep the potty there and ask him often if he needs/wants to use it. Let him be in control and as he gets older he will eventually decide to use it full time. Good Luck!

I'm going thru the same thing with my 2 1/2 yr old daughter.She went a couple weeks with wanting to sit on the toilet and wearing her pull ups and then suddenly stopped.For us we put the pull ups away, but where she could still see them and let her know she could still wear them but not right now.If she potties in them we go back to a diaper and explain that they are big girl panties.I even went out and bought a cheap pack of Diego briefs (its what she picked.as long as she gets potty trained I dont really care what kinda underwear she's in) and she wears them over a diaper which makes her want to be in a pullup even more.If she used the potty while in them then she gets a sticker :) I have a friend who's daughter wasn't potty trained till right before her 4th birthday but her son was potty trained within a few months.Also a niece of mine was potty trained in like 3 months flat.We did with her what I'm doing with my daughter.All just depends on the child.

Pull ups just delay the process. It delayed my ready to go 2 year old for a whole year. The moment I put her into training underwear (thick potty training cloth underwear) she was completely trained in two weeks. They need to feel the pee and poo as uncomfortable so they have motivation to use the toilet instead of the diaper. Pull ups just make it comfortable for them to go conveniently in their diaper. The cloth trainers are thick enough to not leak but provide the awareness for the toddler.

Good Luck!

I know a lot of people say girls are easier to potty train than boys but my son was a cinch. I used the potty training in less than a day book and it worked! He had a few accidents the first week but he did great. My daughter on the other hand had accidents until she was 6 years old and we didn't really start training her until she was 3 because she had no interest. Each child is so different. I would recommend trying the book. Don't ask if they have to go, just take them. If you do use Pull-ups try the one's that turn cold when they wet in them. Praise for sitting on the potty even if the don't go. My third child is now 27 months and has had great interest in the potty since about 21 months. He's ready, I'm not. I have a 5 month infant too. So, I'm in about the boat as you. Good luck!

I had started potty training my firstborn at 17 months but then when number 2 arrived we waited to finish the process till he was 3. One day I decided to take his morning diaper and said that there are no more diapers and threw it in the trash. He adjusted really quick to the toilet (but he already knew what to do from the previous training.) Yes, there were accidents but it only lasted for about three days since three days usually forms a habit. He is four now and we do have to use pull-ups or a diaper at night but that is because he sleeps so hard at night. I am not worrying about it because he will eventually grow out of that stage. As for my second son, I am waiting this time till he is three and if he is interested in trying the potty then great! But I am not stressing out about it till later and I will plan, one morning, to tell him that there are no more diapers and throw his diaper in the trash (he has to see that it goes in the trash.) Hope this helps. JN

It is normal for children to go back and forth a little. He is still young, I would just keep him in pullups and let him have a little more time to practice on his own schedule before you go full on to potty training.

Hi,

We potty trained our son about a month ago--he was going about once a day on the potty, but what really put us on the right track was buying him some underwear and keeping him in only those except for at sleeping times--honestly, I would have been too afraid to do it, but grandma came to visit because I had to work one day while his dad was out of town. She took him to Walgreens and they picked out underwear and a potty treats. He just ran around in underwear for a couple of days and we didn't leave the house much--for the first few days we set a timer to go off frequently and put him on the toilet. I think in part he just loved to go potty for grandma because she was so excited...we all were! Also, in undies we could immediately see if he was going and could run him to the toilet. It worked really fast and really well--he is 19 months now and rarely has an accident. We gradually and organically stopped using treats about 2 weeks after starting. Plus, he is so cute in his little undies I can't even stand it!