Husband in the Hospital

Updated on July 06, 2013
M.B. asks from Clearwater, FL
13 answers

Yep title says it...my husband has cellulitis AGAIN on his legs...ugh...my 7 year old is very upset and was crying when we left the hospital without daddy. I had to drive him because be barely made it home from work due to the pain.I plan on taking the kids to the museum and maybe Disney World this weekend. My question is with my son being so upset that daddy's in the hospital, should I bring him to visit? My husband will be there about 5 days.

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So What Happened?

Added our son is used to daddy being gone, he's gone weeks without seeing him due to moves and such, I think it's the whole daddy's in the hospital. But I've decided to head to Disney for the weekend, it will be a nice distraction for us all, and we will see daddy when we return Sunday
@mums who seems to be questioning my decisions, my husband is one of those lucky people who is prone to cellulitis no reason ibehind it he JUST IS. It's nothing to do with his circulation he's seen many drs about this because he's had it at least 4 times in the 10years we have been together. We went and had dinner with him to other and, other then blaming his baby sister for scratching my husbands leg with a book last week, he understands daddy will be ok in a few days....

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B..

answers from Dallas on

Yes, but short visits. For their mental and physical health, make it short. They will understand better as it goes along and feel more comfortable about it.

9 moms found this helpful

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H.M.

answers from Dallas on

Yes take him to visit he needs to be able to see that daddy is ok. I was in the hospital for a week and then again 3 days about a month later when my son was close to that age and it made a huge difference with my boys being able to see me and that I was ok.

5 moms found this helpful
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A.C.

answers from Dallas on

It made such a difference for my kids (ages 6 and 3) to see their dad in hospital. Someone told me "be careful, you must get rest, you can't drive with no sleep" and my 6 year old was within earshot pretending to watch tv and muttered to himself "yeah, I don't want to lose BOTH parents". I was like "boy, you haven't lost your dad! we know exactly where he is: sleeping in the hospital". He just looked at me blankly, and I knew the next day I'd be taking the boys to the hospital for their own good. They just needed to lay eyes on him and say they loved him, and for him to touch their heads or hold their hands and say he loved them too. It's important. I didn't take them when he was on life support, but when he got the big tube thing taken out of his mouth and was awake and able to talk, I brought them.
I warned them on the way through the hospital that the hospitals have germs and also don't need more "little boy germs" so they are to be careful about not touching stuff, walls, or getting on the floors. They were to be quiet and not too loud (ICU floor), but just to visit with daddy for a little bit. I warned them that he would be so happy to see him, but that it wouldn't be a very long visit because he doesn't have a lot of energy right now, he wouldn't be in hospital if he had all his energy. They both understood it, and there was no issue. It was very good for him to see the boys, and very good for them to see him! We visited everyday about 15 to 30 minutes. We brought coloring pages, notes, a balloon, a bear, some black licorice (one of his favorite treats), his own notebook/pen, his mp3 player, a couple pictures we'd taken out, something everyday to let him know we'd thought of him and to keep him "company" while we were apart. Of course they were there happily carrying balloons and "escorted" the nurse pushing daddy in the wheelchair through the hospital while I ran to get the car and pick them up on the day he got to come home.
My advice is to ask husband what he wants, and to say that your son is upset and may want to see him. If husband is up for the visit, I think it could do good for his spirits as well as your son's.

5 moms found this helpful
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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

The more familiar the child is with the hospital and what goes on there the more comfortable he'll be with dad staying there. He needs to go every day and stay as many hours as they will let him be there. It will take the scary mystery away and he'll see the factual things going on with dad.

4 moms found this helpful
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E.M.

answers from Phoenix on

Just wanted to add my best wishes for a quick recovery for your husband!

I agree with posters below that your son's imagination may be his worst enemy. If your husband feels up to a call, Skype, or short daily visits, I would go with that. If you think the hospital might be too much for him, stick with the phone/computer. When I am travelling for work I like to call home and read my kiddos their bedtime stories over the phone. It keeps a little part of our normal routine going. Maybe your husband could do something similar? Even if it is just a quick good morning or good night?

3 moms found this helpful
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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

I could only see him growing more anxious the longer they stay apart. Take him, but explain that the hospital has visitor hours and you must leave when the [time] comes.

3 moms found this helpful
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S.F.

answers from Fargo on

I agree with Mymission. I am SO sorry your husband is in the hospital! My heart goes out to you. I hope he recovers quickly and that your son feels better about Daddy being in the hospital.
Hugs!

2 moms found this helpful
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M.R.

answers from Seattle on

M., what do you mean by 'again'. How often does this happen? And why is it happening so often? What can be done to improve his leg circulation? And to minimize these horrible infections?

This is a very serious condition, and I have to say, your response seems like 'Meh." Oh well, let's go to Disney and have fun and leave Daddy in the hospital. So what.....

It sounds like your son is having a normal emotional response to his Dad being quite sick and you are quite aloof about it.

You know, you're not talking about a distant relative or friend. It's his Dad, and being gone for weeks for moves or other non-health threatening things doesn't quite compare to when there is a health problem.

So, I'm confused about the sense of priorities. Can you visit Dad before the trip to Disney. Do you have to be gone the whole weekend? Can you go on just day trips and visit both morning/night? Or are children not allowed to visit parents in this particular ward because of the infectious nature?

2 moms found this helpful
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J.C.

answers from New York on

Absolutely bring them for a visit. Just do a lot of hand washing.

Sorry to hear your news and I hope he's well and home soon!

2 moms found this helpful

C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

M.:

I'm sooo sorry your husband is ill! Having a skin infection like cellulitis must hurt!!

Do you have Skype? If not - sign up for it. that way he will be able to see his daddy before bedtime.

does your husband want him there to visit? If he's in a LOT of pain - he might not want him to see him like that. Talk with your husband and see what he wants to do. If he says "NO" to visits...talk about skype.

If your son is confused, explain to him that Daddy has an infection that the doctor's are trying to get rid of and he needs his rest, that's why he's in the hospital. He's 7, he should understand that.

Good luck! Healing prayers coming your way!

1 mom found this helpful
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D..

answers from Miami on

Can your husband Skype with him? If he can, try that. This way, your son can't see all that Daddy is going through. But they can talk to each other. Ask Daddy to keep things upbeat. He has access to a hospital social worker who he can ask how to talk to the 7 year old to help him with being upset.

I'm so sorry for your hubby. I hope that they can help him.

1 mom found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Are you sure a phone call to Dad every day won't be enough?
A hospital can be a pretty depressing place for kids and I hate all the germs they can be exposed to.
Just seeing Dad stuck in the hospital and having to leave him there every day for 5 more days might be more than your son can deal with.
But absolutely let him come when it's time to bring Dad home.

1 mom found this helpful
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B.A.

answers from Minneapolis on

Yes, you need to take him to visit. He needs to be reassured that daddy is being taken care of and getting better. This is different from traveling, he knows his dad is sick and he's worried.

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