How to Get Toddlers/preschoolers to Nap and to Go to Bed at Bedtime /With Update

A toddler between the ages of 12 months and 24-30 months still needs a good nap during the day. Any older than that might be old enough to not need a nap. I hate that they get to that age and don't sleep anymore. I truly think that kids need to nap until they are in kindergarten. So, if she doesn't need a nap anymore you have to acknowledge this and let her stay up. She needs to have quiet time outside of their bedroom. Get the kiddo to sleep then do something with the older girl.

Sad as it is, it sounds like she is just not going to take a nap anymore and she's keeping the other girl from taking one.

If it were me I'd put her in a Mother's Day out or some other pre-school program that lasted through naptime for a while to see if they can get her back in the habit of sleeping during the day.

I agree with Gamma. I also think that if she wets herself on purpose, that you should let her feel the wet instead of changing her instantly. If she were asleep and wet herself in the middle of the night, you wouldn't know. If you do not change her, she will stop doing this eventually.

Go ahead and have the nightlight. But you might do what Supernanny does. She sits in the dark room in the middle of the floor with absolutely no talking and no interaction. If the kids get up, she gets up and puts them back in the bed. Over and over the first couple of nights. Then after a few nights, it gets less and less and soon they are asleep in just a few minutes.

I'll tell you what the woman in New York who helps people get ready for having a baby did with one SIX year old that pulled your daughter's stunt. She took ALL her toys out of her play room and sent them away. She told her that until she behaved (she was doing this bedtime thing, kicking her pregnant mommy and being absolutely dreadful), that she would not get her toys back. She straightened up a lot, and got the toys back.

I don't know that your daughter is old enough to do that, because you haven't mentioned her age, but if she keeps it up, perhaps this is exactly what you should do. Your older one will stop giving into your younger one's antics if she loses HER toys. Sometimes it's like the Army - one of them gets in trouble, they all get in trouble...

Good luck.

Just put them to bed. Nap time they can sleep or just play quietly but must be in their bed.

Schedule their nap for a specified timeframe. Make it early enough that they get some rest before they are overtired, but do not let them sleep so long or so late (generally not past 4PM) that they are not ready for bed at an appropriate time. Then once it is bedtime, use a good bedtime routine to put them in bed and encourage them to stay there.

With my DD, I allow her to have the big light on and I turn it off when I go to bed. She has a night light if she wakes up.

If the child pees herself on purpose, I'd put her in a pull up or make her change her own sheets, etc. If she's old enough to use a toilet, and gets up to do so, then let her get up, pee, and return to bed. If she pees during time out, let her sit in it. If she is in time out, she will only be there a few minutes.

If they say they want water, simply say no, and put them back to bed. Once you've said it one time, don't say it over and over. Back to bed, back to bed, back to bed. Minimal interaction. They will test you. But if you are consistent, they will get the idea.

If they cannot go to bed at the same time and not feed off each other, then put one to bed and 20 minutes later put the other to bed.

Make sure they have activity.

Ensure their nap times & bedtimes have a big span in between them.
So if their nap ends at 2pm, they most likely won't be in bed at 8pm.
So I rolled "with" their ever changing needs w/o pushing any one routine.
Their naps & times DID change. I went with it. Never had a problem.

I made sure he was active so he'd be good & tired.
He stopped naps at about age 3 or 3 1/2. Then sometimes if we had a
very busy day he'd be exhausted & fall asleep.
Sometimes he would fall asleep in the car on the way home from somewhere.

Also, I never made his bedtime early.
So he ALWAYS went to bed.

The earliest he ever went to bed was 9pm w/o a nap.

We call it "Quiet Time" not nap or bed time. Honestly, once you can get them to lay still for a few minutes, they usually drift off. If not, they are reading (or looking at picture books) and will rest if they need it.