I suffered from fear of flying for years, but I too LOVE to travel. Before getting married, I really wanted to get help so that I wouldn't be nutso on the flight to our honeymoon. In the past I had used valium to some effect to mellow out at the airport and on the plane.
So, anyway, I started counseling sessions that my health insurance covered. Mostly I remember that the psychologist wanted me to read a book about how to deal with anxiety/panic attacks. The book is the tool that taught me to use breathing, visualization, and positive self-talk to help cope with fearful thoughts and the bodily reactions that go with them. The book was a huge help and I haven't taken valium since even though I've flown on 5-12 hour flights since then. The fear hasn't totally gone away, but I'm not fraught with anxiety the night before the trip, crying on the car ride, or having my stomach turn in the airport. I will admit that I am nervous at take off, landing and during turbulence. But I can almost ignore that I'm in a plane the rest of the time.
I'm sorry that I can't remember the name of the book, but perhaps you can do a search and check out some of them at the library or at the book store. If you can go to counseling too, that would be great. Good luck and keep in mind two things:
1. Fear of flying is very common. One out of every 10 suffer from some level of it.
2. If the coping mechanisms mentioned above don't work, there are always drugs you can use as a back up.