How Much Formula/milk Two-year=olds Should Have?

Updated on July 06, 2009
E.L. asks from Mountain View, CA
13 answers

My boys are 2 and they still drink a lot of formula (up to 3-4 7oz bottles a day), and that seem to be a large part of their diet. They feed themselves and eat plenty of finger foods, but I cannot say we transitioned to table foods. They would only eat certain foods and rarely what I make. They seem to want to be independent, they would eat with their own spoons or finger foods, yet it concerns me that they only have 2 meals a day and the rest is formula and water. Any advice? Is that normal at this age? (I'm getting a lot of response and would like to add that we do not drink milk in our household, our boys drink soy milk, but it does not seem to be as nutritiously balanced as formula. I'm not sure what to replace the formula with since we are not using dairy milk.)

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So What Happened?

I appreciate everyone's efforts to help, although I have to say I'm surprised and even hurt by the tone of some of these advices. I was looking for feedback and support but somehow attracted a lot of reprimands, lectures or questioning my ways. I am sure that everyone comes forward wanting to help but somehow the respectful attitude to a different style of life or choices has been lost on a few occasions. This is not a forum to discuss or debate the dietary choices; at least, that has not been my intent for this post, so I do not feel I have to explain or justify why we do not drink dairy in our household. While I appreciate advice received and I got some good ideas from it, I invite everyone to be more respectful and tolerant of the values and life styles differing from their own, and deliver advice in a more neutral way.

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S.M.

answers from San Francisco on

Two is too old to still be drinking formula. If you don't drink milk, then give them water and/or juice, but don't let them fill up on just drinks. They will eat what you serve them when they are hungry. If you cook spicy or otherwise difficult adult foods, have an alternative to offer, but otherwise, offer them what you are having, and if they don't eat it, let it go.

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B.V.

answers from Sacramento on

We had the same issue and asked our pediatrician about it. She said not to give our son more than 18 oz of milk a day because it can interfere with iron absorption and lead to iron deficiency anemia. We still give him 3 cups of milk a day so are probably a bit over the 18 oz limit but it certainly made us stop and think! He now is a great water drinker and will accept water when we tell him he has had enough milk. I'm sure your boys will start eating more food once the formula is a little less available. Good luck!

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J.K.

answers from Fresno on

They should not need formula at this age and should be getting all their nutrients from table food and healthy snacks. They can have whole milk in a cup and some water to drink. Give finger foods to munch on.

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T.H.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi E.,

Wow, a lot of people are being kind of harsh - you are posting because you are concerned and this is a support forum. I think that because it's formula vs milk you are right, it is a nutritiously balanced beverage, however because it's a "meal" it's filling them up and they aren't hungry for real/table food. My friend still gives her 2 year old formula and she has the same problem. I'd bet if you cut back on the milk/formula they would eat more food (though it may take a week or so for everyone to come around...).

Good luck!
T.

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V.V.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi E....

As everyone told you ...I hope I'm not harsh on you but...

take them off from formula, there's way too much you are giving them, besides they don't need it , just whole milk... and not a lot what you are giving them... make the transition right now... plus you will be making a HUGE savings here... I started to make the transition from formula to whole milk at age 1 and can't be happier about it... 3 family meals very important, snacks between, lots of water, a little bit of juice if they like (my sons not)...

Act now mom... good luck :-)

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D.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Greetings E.: What do you have against dairy milk?? I am the mother of 5, the foster mother to many childen and now the grandmother of several sweethearts.
I have talked with several mothers ( some happen to be doctors and nurses)none have known of children your age still using formula unless they have a medical problem.
Nothing about things you mentioned sound normal for 2 year oldsto me. I always start the transition to the same foods that the rest of the family eats by 9 months old. By age 2 they always use much less milk than you are giving. Generally a 3 0z cup in the morning one at nap time and one at bedtime. We give juice and water inbetween. As the parent you are the one that sets the meal standards for the children. You can find foods that are easily prepared by you if your concern is what is in the item. By age 2 you have toddlers that are transitioning to big boy needs. It is not uncommon for little ones to eat only 2 small meals a day as they only have tiny tummys and then want snacks or fruit and vegetables. You may find you have to consider how healthy the orientals feed their children and follow their example. We lived on Guam and learned from them how to prepare foods and feed our children in a relaxed and healthy way including drinking Cocnut milk ( we had them everywhere and literally drained the water and ground the meat ourselves to make the milk.)
Enjoy your adventure of parenthood, it is the greatest school that you will ever be apart of because you will learn more than any other place in the world. It is the greatest accomplishment I have ever achieved. Nana G

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B.R.

answers from Sacramento on

I hope I don't come off sounding harsh, but it sounds to me like it's time for mom to take back her role and be the mom here.
Why are they still getting formula rather than regular milk? If there's not a reason they can't drink milk, then I would take the formula away and start them on milk, but ONLY at three mealtimes and two snacks a day. You don't even have to serve milk as the drink for each of those five times, but it will probably be good for beginning the transition. Give them about half a juice sized glass of milk and refill it no more than one time during each meal. It also sound like you might want to start them off with food in front of them, and a glass half filled with water, then after they've eaten some food, offer them the milk. That way they won't be filling up on milk first rather than eating the food.

One thing I keep asking people on here is "do you have them eating at the table with you?" That helps children learn good eating habits (of course it means the adults must be exhibiting good eating habits themselves, but I am assuming you and their father do that).

You say they seem to want to be independent. If you mean by that they are trying to feed themselves... YES! They are more than ready to be independent! Let them! Give them a fork and a spoon and help them learn to use them. Be flexible enough to also let them still use their hands, - even in the 'squishy' food - for a while. I know sometimes adults have a problem seeing kids eat this way at the table, but it's part of the learning process.

Serve the children the same foods you eat, but be sure your diet includes 'child friendly' foods. You may need to cut up, mash or otherwise prepare some of the foods so they can more easily handle them, but you'll be surprised how quickly they learn to do those things for themselves too.

Eliminate any 'between meal' snacking other than a planned morning and afternoon snack that is spaced two hours before or after a meal. For those snacks, a cracker or two and piece of fruit with a small glass of milk or water should be sufficient to hold them until the next meal. You might vary that with crackers and cheese or some other combination. The rule of thumb is one food from each of two food groups, and something to drink along with it.

You may have to endure some complaining from your boys until they get used to you being in charge of their dietary needs, but it will be worth it to you and more importantly to them, in the long run.

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S.H.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi E..

I hope that you have found some helpful responses. I guess my first question is, do your children see a pediatrician and if so, what does he/she say about their feedings? Do they know that you are still doing 3-4 7oz bottles a day? My other question is, why don't you drink milk in your household? For health reasons? Are you a vegan and want to raise your children vegan? In my experience with raising my 3 children, people in society can have varying opinions on how to best raise children. HOWEVER, pediatricians should have a standard of care for children and you need to make sure that you are sticking with the general plan for children's development. I know you don't want to harm your children in any way, so you need to make sure that you are making the best choices for their health with regard to their feedings.

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N.C.

answers from Sacramento on

Wow, take them off the formula, they definatley don't need to be on it anymore. Most take them off formula at 1. Try the gerber graduate foods that are made for little fingers. Slowly introduce new foods, keep putting it in front of them and they will eventaully eat it. My 14 month old will not eat new foods, I have to put some on her lips and once she realizes it tastes good then she will eat it, but not before, she just throws it on the ground. If you are concerned about nutrtion, get sneaky chef. It tells you how to puree vegies and put them in their food. Like pizza, you use pureed sweet potatoe for the sauce and top with cheese or whatever you want. Your boys should be eating what you are eating, just keep at it they will do it eventually. Good luck

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K.Y.

answers from San Francisco on

E-mail me at ____@____.com. I'll see if I can get my hubby to help me scan a chart on serving sizes of food for you.

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J.H.

answers from Salinas on

At this age, 18-24oz of fluid a day is the recommendation. Preferably milk and water with a limit on juice. They should also be eating normal table food. You are not a short order cook so they should be offered what you and DH are eating. If they choose to not eat it, do not offer them other options....I promise, they will not starve themselves. Good luck!

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S.J.

answers from Sacramento on

Is there a reason that you are still giving them formula?

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A.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Sorry just have to comment on the controversy, and remind you that there are some very sad cases of parents being tried and convicted of involuntary manslaughter because they tried to raise babies vegan and obviously did not succeed (this is why you maybe got some negative posts because justification for a lifestyle does not include putting children at risk). . .that being said I think it IS possible (and certainly your children are thriving I assume), but most people without medical background may not ensure the children are getting enough fat/calcium without milk. . . so if you are 100% confident you can get adequate nutrition without dairy milk go for it, if not its not worth your child's health for a belief system and you can be held responsible. Looks like you are a PhD student though, so you should be able to do some better research than this board for adequate sources of nutrition because yes, that much formula is not normal and children should be eating food at 2 years. I suggest you talk in depth with a pediatrician nutritionist. Also, I know you think what you are doing is healthier, but have you research the possible estrogenic effects of soy on boys. . . it seems like a valid concern. BTW, I am fully supportive of vegan, veggie, soy lifestyles, but just think that the ramifications need to be considered and very closely monitored before taking chances with children's health. . .

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