Hi ladies,
My 14 month old has never been a good sleeper. I am still bf'ing at night, and she has gotten into the habit of holding and playing with my hair while feeding and also in order to sleep. I can't get her to sleep without it, it really was bad for me to let it get this far. I either hold her until she falls asleep, or lay down with her (we both sleep on a mattress on the floor in her room) and she twirls my hair until she falls asleep. She never took to a pacifier. I have tried getting her hold a small blanket (I used a burp cloth) or small stuffed animal. I slept with them close to me to try to get my smell on them beforehand. But she has no interest in grabbing anything other than my hair. Has anyone gone through this or have any tips on guiding her to take to a blanket or some other item? thanks so much for any thoughts!
Thanks ladies so much! What great suggestions - I think the fleece blanket with knots or fringed blanket may work. I'll try that, and then maybe the doll and other suggestions. They are all such good ideas, thanks so much! It helps to know that there are solutions out there that have worked for all of you. As always, everyone has been so helpful. thanks! :)
You've gotten some great suggestions already. My daughter's blankie is one I made from fleece. I cut strips across the side and tied each strip in a simple knot. She loves rubbing the "fringe" edges. I would recommend making at least 2 so you can wash them. They don't age well, so you might even consider making a few. I will say, however, my daughter prefers her oldest blankies to her newer ones.
Good luck!
J.
What about a doll with hair? Like a Dora doll that she can use?
The 2 things that helped me personally with sleep training the most were:
sleep is NOT innate. It is a learned habit - so if your child learns to sleep on you, with your hair, a pacifier, etc, etc, they will NEED that to sleep unless otherwise TAUGHT differently. Just like some of us adults need the TV, a certain pillow, darkness, a night light, etc to sleep.
And those habits take time to break.
Secondly - only change ONE habit at a time. So maybe the hair first, the BF'g next, then sleeping with you....
Good luck!
I had the same problem with my now 3 yrs old daughter. I found my own solution, I'm not sure of your ethnicity, but I have dreadlock, so I cut some of them and gave them to her. I know that is weird, but it works. If you have don't have the same hair texture as me, maybe you could braid a small piece and cut it, hold it with a rubber band. My daughter only has hers in the car or at home, grandma's house, she takes it to bed with her. I hope this help.
M.
My daughter did the same thing and we bought her a corn silk hair Cabbage Patch doll. She had no interest in that doll at all. We finally got her night weaned -helps to have dad deal at night when she wakes up, and then put her in her own bed. We graduated from sleeping on the floor of her room for much of the night, putting our hand in the crib when she needed comfort, to sleeping across the hall in the guest room, to finally going back to our own room. We could not have gotten her to sleep alone and all night without night weaning her first.(She finally learned to play with her own hair for comfort, and at 4, still does that.) We tried a similar approach with our son, who was way more stubborn about sleeping with me and being able to nurse all night long. I finally found a book by a lady who they call the "Sleep Lady." Her approach is called the "Sleep Lady Shuffle" and it is similar to what we did by staying by the crib. She recommends you do that for 3 days and then move farther and farther away every 3 days until you meet your goal. Google the sleep lady and find the book. i found it at the library and it was so helpful. Good luck!
By the way, my daughter was sleeping in her bed most of the night (until about 3 or 4 am) by 9 or 10 months -nursing only morning and night, and totally weaned by 15 months. My son is still inconsistently sleeping the night at 19 months, but stays in his bed for the most part and was finally totally weaned at 18 months. He stayed all night in his bed starting at 9 months, but couldn't sleep all night till about 15 months. They are all so different!
Hi M. - There is a company called Taggies. They make blankets & dolls and all sorts of items. The blankets in particular have small tags of different fabrics all around the edges. I think your daughter would like this kind of thing, especially if you only use it while nursing, so it's special.
Here is the link on Amazon:
http://www.amazon.com/Little-Taggie-Blanket-Starry-Night/...
Hope this helps,
T. Y SAHM of 4 (9yrs, 7yrs, 2yrs and 10 weeks)
my daughter loves to play with and pull my hair too when falling asleep. to be honest, i wear a hoodie, super tight, and then she can't find my hair. maybe its not the best solution, but it works.
Oh I empathise! I went through the same thing with son #2. A mom at a playgroup had the same issue and her daughter had a "lovey" - it was a crocheted blanket (small though maybe 6x6")with fringe at all the edges. So I tried it - took some time for him to get use to using it but it eventually worked. I would put the blankie near my shoulder so when he reached he got that instead of my hear (I also pulled my hair back in an elastic) - he still uses it to this day (he's almost 4). I've made a few so he could have one at daycare when he was little, one for the car, etc... He still does from time to time play with my hair but now I enjoy when he does because it's just a loving touch - my hair is no longer breaking and he is no longer relying on it to fall asleep! Good luck
HA! This could have been written my me! My daughter (now 2 1/2) did the same thing. She still does when she's overtired or very upset.
Similarly, my daughter never took a pacifier or showed any interest in a blanket or other lovey. I breastfed her, so she associated sleep/comfort with me and my hair!
I bought her a very fuzzy stuffed duck and explained that was her sleeping buddy. I would sit next to her bed, but when she reached for my hair, I took her hair and pet the duck and explained that he would sleep with her all night. She even found twirling her own hair to be comforting!
Keep in mind that it's just the habit she's formed that lulls her to sleep. She will develop another with your help. GOOD LUCK!
What about a dolly with life-like hair? My daughter is a hair puller too, she is now 4 and plays with her own hair at night, but will still request "pay wif your hair" if I'm close enough. Maybe a doll that has hair like mom's would be a good transitional object?
Our little one was the same way! Horrible sleeper woke up a few times duringthe night until she was 2 and loves "mommy hair". We should have stopped it sooner. This is what we did and it worked. Start a nap/bed time routine. Tis is ours we read book. While reading books she would try to play with my hair as I read I gently keep movingher hand down. After a few weeks of that I sit so she can't reach and if she tries, I gently move her back without saying anything, I just keep reading. Instead of my hair she has moved on toher own hair.
Our little girl is in a bed, so as for falling a sleep and staying a sleep, we put a gate up inthe door way. It took a couple of weeks, but we just let her cry it out. She learned how to put herself to sleep. At first she cried for 1/2 hour then 20 minutes, then 15 now we say goodnight and she knows that is it, time for sleep. Keep your routine the same and she'll start to know what to expect. Don't give in to crying or "mommy". If she wakes during the night, don't do anything. Stay in bed!!!
Good luck. You're not alone!! And soon you'll be caught up on sleep.
