Home Schooling - Jacksonville,NC

Updated on March 26, 2010
L.S. asks from Jacksonville, NC
15 answers

Can you moms please give me the in's and out's, up's and down's, postives and negatives of home schooling. I have a daughter who will be in first grade and a son in preschool. I am looking into home schooling but want mom's inputs!
Thanks,
L.

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J.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

I can't give advice as a parent who homeschooled, but I can give you advice from someone who was homeschooled. I didn't appreciate it much when I was being homeschooled, but when I got to college I realized what an advantage I had. I could... #1 SPELL, #2 WORK HARD WITHOUT PRODDING, #3 MY ENGLISH SKILLS ACTUALLY EXISTED!! Granted they've slipped a bit now, but I was going for an english major before marriage and children happened. When I'm on-line with friends I often wonder how their spelling and sentence structure could be so poor. Now my math skills aren't the best, but even with professional coaching in college they never really existed. I came to realize that I just didn't have much ability when it came to doing advanced math. However, my other skills were so well established it didn't matter.

I would recommend joining a well established homeschool group. I was in one growing up that offered classes just like a regular school. We went once a week and could take classes like Spanish, Speech, Creative Writing, etc.

I would highly recommend homeschooling to anyone. You can even get video classes through Bob Jones University that are quite good. My friend uses them.

I never felt at a disadvantage. I got good or great grades once in college.

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C.L.

answers from Las Vegas on

I will be starting to homeschool my son in Kinder this year... I'm doing pre-K this last 2009-2010 year. My sister in law has homeschooled her two boys through 3rd grade now, several of my friends are now homeschooling. The key is to get plugged into a homeschool support network in your area. I would also recommend knowing your particular states laws on homeschooling requirements. Then take a look at all the different curriculum available. The positives of homeschooling is that you can tailor the curriculum and teaching styles to the learning style of each individual child so that they are getting the best possible results. Of course the flexibility is a positive, you can choose your school days, school hours, etc. Your kids don't miss nearly as much school for being sick! Your kids will also likely be less prone to being negatively influenced or exposed to peer-pressure because they will be out of that circle.

I think the stereotypical negative is "what about socialization?" Well, let me tell you that my 4 1/2yr old son has better communication skills with both same-aged children as well as adults than most pre-K. Finding a good support group that has playdates, events, field trips, etc so that the children don't feel left out of those activities is just as important. Also involving your children in extra-curricular activities such as sports or music will help them develop those social relationships that are also important.

Personally, I believe the positives far out-weigh any negatives.

Best wishes in your search and your decision!
C.

p.s. I will add that you are going to find examples of children that failed after homeschooling and those that succeeded. So it's a personal family decision and you have to see how each child responds. Here is an example of a great accomplished homeschooler. http://www.examiner.com/x-26328-Canada-Homeschooling-Exam...#

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A.R.

answers from St. Louis on

Hi L.,

As you will see, moms have very different experiences in home schooling. My experience has been great. I have a 4 year old boy and an older one to be 10 soon. I started about more than a year ago, and I love it! If you ask my kids, basically the oldest, he will tell you he loves it, too.
We work 4 hours in the morning, with two-10 min breaks. After lunch, we study a couple of hours more or one an half. Both of my kids attend to different activities. The older one goes to Tae Kwon DO, swim and PE with a fantastic group of homeschoolers. I managed to teach my younger one all he needs to know to go to Kindrgarten IF I decide to send him. Besides that, he attends to gym and playgroups, so he does not feel alone without interacting with peers of his age.

I probably would call disadvantages "more effort" in keeping the house clean and balancing all the chores, errands and stuff that we, moms, have to do. It is essential to be organized. It is not easy, but doable, depending on your goals, depending on whether you want to homes school your kids by zero routine, lots of outdoor playing and random subjects OR by actually teaching them real subjects in a steady way with lots of imagination and good routine. I chose the last one.

There are pllenty of curriculum, resources and tools to teach your kids (with or without cost). I chose Kolbe Academy School. I chose it because they give/sell me all the material I need (textbooks, course descriptions, all the records I need to do this seriously and according to Law State),academic advisors and every single written guideline I need to teach my kids. There are PLENTY of resources out there that you don't need to buy all the time, but Kolbe was my best option. I teach my older son 11 subjects, and he has learned so much more than when he attended to public school. I could go on and on.....
Home schooling is NOT isolation at all, I found my kids and myself to have more friends (good ones!!!) than ever before, and that was one of the remarks that my own kid told me. There is PLENTY of socialization or socializing whatever you want for your kids.

How to know if your kids are learning? Just testing, you can do it on your own (library resources, national tests available, quizzes, quarterly exams prepared by yourself or any other organization you may want to work with) I chose to use national standard test and quizzes, tests and quarterly exams send by Kolbe.

I think that the attitude and conviction you have about this will tremendously impact how your kids feel or will feel in the future. Whatever you decide is for YOUR kids and YOUR family (because this is a family decision), and home schooling works differently for each family. I made LOTS of research, I asked LOTS of questions, and I google into so many different H S websites, and I felt the way you are feeling right now....I did my homework. After all this, I made the best decision I have ever made in my life; my kids looks so happy, and active and aware and peaceful, and always remember the reasons that took me H..
Good luck!!!
Alejandra

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A.C.

answers from Cincinnati on

Honestly, I think it really depends on you as a parent and your children, and also the schools in your area. I am strongly considering home-schooling my kids for their first couple of years, although I haven't decided yet. It will depend on where we live and if I'm up to it at the time. I do think too much pressure is put on kids too young these days, and I don't want my kids to grow to hate school because they have hours of homework in 3rd grade. However, I do intend for them to eventually go to public school with everyone else. I was not home-schooled, and I did well in school, was very social, went to a good college, and then completed my M.A., so I am probably biased toward public schooling. But I was blessed to live in a very good school district, as well, and this isn't always the case for everyone.

Another reason I am biased is that all of my husband's nieces and nephews were home-schooled, and it was a nightmare for that family. The kids finally went to public school when the oldest was a junior in high school and the youngest was in 6th grade. The oldest two children both did surprisingly poorly in high school (considering that they had had their mother's undivided attention as a teacher) once they were forced to study things that didn't necessarily interest them, and both were surprised to learn that they were considerably behind their peers in math and science (but not in English, which is where their mother had excelled). The eldest blamed his teachers. He had trouble socially as well, as he had never had to deal with kids who weren't home-schooled just like him, and he looked down on his classmates' public education (while failing classes himself). Both went on to college, they were only able to get into the local community college because of their poor grades, and the older one has already dropped out because he didn't like his professors (apparently, he cannot handle any teacher besides his mother). The younger two children are in high school now, and they are doing well, although one has social troubles as well (but this may just be her personality, as she is very shy). I believe they had the advantage because they were able to adapt to classes and workloads before they reached high school. We hope that they will be able to go on to college.

Considering the case above, I will add that I do not know whether their mother was lazy or diligent with the education of her children, nor could I tell you what curriculum they used. The kids were obviously allowed to study whatever interested them, which is wonderful for kids (I wish I had had such opportunities), but were never made to study (in depth, at least) subjects that did not interest them, which left their skills lacking. Their social lives, while not neglected, were restricted to a limited group of children who may have had similar issues. I think all of these problems could be easily corrected by a dedicated home-schooling parent, but you need to decide if that is who you are. Good luck with whatever you decide.

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B.T.

answers from Detroit on

I am speaking from experience BEING homeschooled 7th & 8th grade. It was very informative for me, and it gave me the chance to excel and if I wanted to spend 2 hours writing, or reading, I could do that. I think it also provided an environment for me to flourish and my mom could teach me at my pace, not the fast-paced middle school I was in.

I also learned how to run a household. My mom taught me how to write checks, cook, clean, and it also made me an asset to neighbors for babysitting. I was able to do school and babysit too.

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M.K.

answers from Houston on

I homeschooled my son through K and half of first - it didnt work for me because I also have a 2 year old who was determined her brother would never get any peace and quiet for studying! - he is now in a private school and is doing 5 times the amount of work I used to do with him, and is flourishing - school is better for him, but with your situation your children are closer in age, and you could work with both of them together and that could work.

up's are - lie ins every day lol, spending time with your kids, your way, you choose the curriculum, you choose field trips, friends and teacher (you lol)

downs are - its hard to be mom and teacher, its hard to seperate them, I always felt I didnt spend enough fun time with my kids because I was always trying to make him get his work done.
Its hard to know if you are doing a good job or not
socialization - the big S - most homeschooling people will say that h/s'd kids are socialized enough - that's not what I saw - I felt highly isolated, and my son was socially stunted through it - but there again we live very rural, not many homeschool families, no co-ops etc - it may be different where you live.

all in all, my stint at homeschooling cured me for life, I grew to loathe it, I and my son are so much happier now - but that is my take on it - I don't want to discourage you, as your situation may be very different.

Oh and we used BJU dvd program which was excellent - I am actually selling the whole first grade set at the moment - you would have to buy new workbooks - but everything else is there (apart from the dvd's which you have to send back)

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M.M.

answers from Jacksonville on

The Onslow County Library is holding a homeschool fair Sat 5/15 10am to 2pm. Go. THere are a bunch of groups, AGAPE, ECHO, the Classical Communications. Plus last year they had used books.
OCPL is on Doris just past the Dance theater.

You will have to inform the NCDNPE.
Go to http://www.ncdnpe.org/index.asp
You need to let the state know in writing that you are opening a homeschool. It is not necessary to let the schools know but they think you need to bring them proof. We let the school know once then when I pulled my 2nd I just didn't even bother.
Testing is to be done in the spring every year. Even the first and 2nd graders. I use the CAT/5 but you can use any test you want.
Attendance is mandatory 180 days a year.
You are supposed to get a visit in the 2nd year of having school. They have not come to see me yet. I'm sure they are underfunded.

Get the book The Well Trained Mind by Susan Wise Bauer. it is very informative and gives specifics on how to implement so much. THe main library has a copy, I then got my own after reading only the first couple chapters.

The POlished Apple on Western has units from Evan More. I use them and they are really good. THey are geared for grades k-3 and 4-6. THey also have literary units geared for age groupings.
If your daughter wants ot be in Girl Scouts they have all that there too.

Homeschooling is the best thing we have ever done. It is a huge commitment. I am on the internet and making worksheets every night. mine are in 6th and 3rd.

Good luck and you can PM me any time. M

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J.C.

answers from Raleigh on

Hi L., After 21 years of homeschooling and still going, there's not enough room to list all the ups of homeschooling. But just a few... freedom to teach your choice of content, on your own schedule, in your own style, to your unique children, according to your own values, with a lot more time left over to pursue life in general. The downs? You might have to work hard at protecting a favorite time-consuming pastime or hobby. Your house might not be sparkling clean and tidy all the time, but you'll have extra help cleaning up. You might miss being alone all day from time to time. You might second guess yourself more, because freedom comes with responsibility, and the more you invest, the more valuable your choices will be. You'll probably miss your kids a LOT when they fly the nest, but you'll have mountains of memories of them as you've walked through that adventure together. It might help you most to contact your local home school group (google HSLDA to start surfing) and ask if there's a venue for you to come to a meeting where you can have your questions answered. While you'll hear a lot of diverse answers, you'll also hear some things repeated from family to family. You can probably count on those things for a general idea concerning if home schooling is a good fit for your family. If you determine that it might be, you can then ask about favorite curriculum for your age group, support groups (in the flesh, or over the web), or activity groups for your kids, etc. I hope that helps you get your start. J.

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C.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

Homeschooling our kids was the best decision we ever made. I am homeschooling my second grader and kindergardner . I also have a three year old and one more on the way. There is so much curriculum to choose from that you can fit it to whatever learning styles your children have. There is also a lot of flexibility if your children are ahead or behind in anything. Your kids will not slip through the cracks because they have a one on one teacher, not a teacher trying to handle 30 something kids. Sure we can have tough days, everyone does. Joining a support group or co-op is also a great idea for support and for getting together with other families. Ours does regular field trips, classes and mom's nights. I hope this helps.
C.

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B.N.

answers from Fayetteville on

I cant think of a single negative to homeschooling-- we absolutely love it.

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A.S.

answers from Denver on

I'm on the Alumni Committee at our local university. Last year we granted a scholarship to a student who was homeschooled for most of his life. When he got to college we was completely overwhelmed by the structure, the need to balance multiple classes and homework to go with them, and the pacing of the classes, much less dealing with several professors and lots of students. For him, homeschooling was a severed handicap when it came to be able to attend college.

My advice it to read "20 chickens for a saddle" about a girl who was homeschooled by two very bright parents in southern Africa. Not saying it's a bad thing, but you need to look beyond yourself to see what your motivations are and whether they will suit your child's needs for now and in the long term future.

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J.K.

answers from Phoenix on

I've been homeschooling for more than 10 years now. My children are 16, 14, 9, 6 and #5 due soon. Homeschooling is a joy and a blessing to our family. There are lots of curriculum to choose from so finding the one that fits your family can be tough but rewarding too. It's work but not hard. I think people either enjoy it or not. They either want to or not. Being involved with a homeschool group for support is great too... although I haven't always done this. You can join your states homeschool group and get newsletters on what is going on in your State. Good luck!

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C.R.

answers from Knoxville on

It can be the most rewarding thing that you do as well as the most work that you do. I have homeschooled all my children through high school. It is a lot of work. It can be so frustrating at times. You have to be the principal, teacher, nurse and doctor as well as making sure that they are learning what they need. On the other hand teaching them and seeing them fully understand the different things is so worth it! If you have a hard time getting your children to listen and mind now, it will not be any easier when they are students. I would suggest looking into your states rules for homeschooling. You can look up Home School Legal Defense Association (HSLDA) . They provide legal support for homeschoolers in all states. You have to fill out papers and join but it is not to expensive. Cheaper than hiring a lawyer later on. They also stay on top of legislation for all states. I would also look into support groups for homeschoolers in your area. Groups like this provide fellowship for both the children as well as the adults. Some groups also do group field trips, activities etc... In MO our group also had choirs, band, orchestra, drama etc... There are a ton of choices for curriculm also. Some of it is very inexpensive all the way to really expensive. You need to understand how your child learns and use a curriculm that will work well for them. God Bless and best wishes! Feel free to contact me privately if you have more questions.

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K.P.

answers from Memphis on

It depends on the parents and the children, so every case may be different.

Most of the people I know home school and I'm planning on that myself when my kids get older -- actually, I'm teaching my 5-y/o & 3-y/o right now. They know all their letters plus many words, their numbers and some basic math, and most of their states and capitals (love the songs with the states & capitals set to music!).

But it's not for everyone -- some parents may just not be cut out for it, and some children may do better not having their parents teach them. It also may be good for the parents and/or children in some grades or subjects but not in others. Some school districts will welcome home-schooled children for one subject or for sports, while they get the bulk of their education at home; and others may frown on it. You may be able to join a local home-school co-op, in which various parents get together and the mom who majored in math in college will teach algebra, and the one who is strong in English will teach all the kids Grammar, etc.

Many parents will home-school their children in the early years when the subjects are easier, and then send them to public school for high school. Others may do the reverse -- allow their children to go to public school for the first years, and then keep them at home when the kids are older and being more under the influence of other kids at school (drugs, sex, etc.).

And I know at least one mom who home-schools one of her children while the others go to school. She feels that he's not getting the help and attention he needs in public school, but the other two are doing fine. If they want to home-school, they can; if they want to go to public school, they can.

Most home-schoolers are as good as if not better than their public-school counterparts in most areas. However, being home-schooled is no guarantee -- I know some home-schoolers who probably ought to be in a brick-and-mortar school because they're falling behind in one or another subject, their grammar skills are lacking, or their spelling is atrocious. It may be due to some learning disability, but more likely it's because their parents don't know any better so can't teach them properly.

So, long story short -- do it if you want to, but you don't have to decide today for the rest of your kids' lives -- you can be flexible.

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J.P.

answers from Boise on

Also, think beyond this year. When/if you plan to put them into school. I went to a private school, and going into a public one in highschool was SO overwhelming. I went from a class of 18 (the whole school, K-8, had 250 kids) to a class of 350! I felt sheltered and didn't know how to handle a lot of the peer pressure type of things.

I'm not saying that home school is bad, or even private school, but think it through and how you will transition them back into school. It may just take a little more planning.

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